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Friday: Lapband Thoughts

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sweetsoutherngirl

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Happy Friday!!! I am so pleased that the weekend is almost here! So a few weeks ago I blogged about a co-worker who is banded and seems to struggle a lot. I felt bad for her and could not understand. Well over the last week I have gotten a clear understanding of why and it pisses me off a bit. I am not any better than anyone, nor do I think I know all the answers. What I do know are the basics. We work so hard to get our bodies ready for the surgery and go through so much afterwards, why would you just say screw it? We had a celebration for our top performers today and the snacks were candies, cookies and juices. I was in charge of passing out the snacks and she came to the line three times and ate skittles, starburst and capri sun. Then she ate a hot pocket. I again am not perfect but I know these things are not good for us, especially with the band. Afterwards she came to ask me how long has it been since my surgery because I was losing weight fast. I explained I was five weeks out and had started to exercise again. She told me she has had 5 fills and she is really tight but can still eat some food. I told her maybe it was time go back to the see the doc. Her reply was that she would be going back to have it taken out since the band " failed" her........ It was not my place to suggest it may be the behavior and not the band, so I just said I was sorry to hear that.

 

WHY??? It is not a quick fix, it will not stop us from making bad food choices, nor will it stop you from possibly wanting to eat those things. I just did not know what to say and it made me feel annoyed that she feels that the "band" failed her. We have to eat right, exercise and take care of ourselves. The band is only a tool. Now I am back to feeling sorry for her because I think she wants someone to help her but I dont know if I am that person. She is seven months down the line and I am a newbie just trying to get my own bearings....

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I think you should try to help her realise in some subtle ways that the band does not prevent her from eating food no matter how tight it is. Befriend her, I don't know? suggest you team up? Seems like total ignorance on her part to me. I wish few years back someone had told me or even suggested how this band really is supposed to work. I pretty much thought... I'm smart, I can read, don't need anyone to tell me how it should be done. Boy was I wrong! Try help her see the importance of sticking to some kind of plan! All the best..

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I agree...the "teaming up" idea is a great one. Befriend her and just acknowledge to her that she'd asked you about your own surgery and losing weight fast. You might even say something like teaming up would help keep you accountable. That way you've (in a subtle way) acknowledged that help is needed, we all have to be accountable and that you're willing to help if she wants it....without really saying all that in those words. Blessings to you!

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While I agree with everyone, some people actually get "offended" when you tell them its not the lapband it's them. I had a person tell me, she couldn't recommend it, it didn't work, all she could eat was candy and drink shakes.. (not protein shakes). I tend to be blunt sometimes without realizing it, and say the first thing that comes to mind, and this friend just kept saying I don't recommend it, its a waste of money. For myself, I kept talking to various people and learning more and found great support . That would be great to team up , if she is willing, just don't let her negativity get to you, let her learn from you. No one said it would be a "game of candyland!"

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I hear u day bay day about the bluntness... :-) That's why we are recommending subtle suggestions be made. But ur right about her learning from the example that sweetsg is showing...

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I will have to see if she is open to maybe teaming up, but I can not allow her to try and de-rail me. I will say again I am no expert in any of this but I know if we follow the rules that we have a better chance to succeed.

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Yes we must follow the rules, see if she's open to teaming up and following the rules. If so then go for it. If she's was to continue on the same path she's on, then move on girl friend. You have to reach your own goals and let no one get in your way. Hate to be blunt but not letting no one detour me, I want to be healthy. Hop on the train or get off the next exit. Congrats on your weight loss, keep it up. Good luck.

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