Mirror Mirror
It took me five months to see that i had lost weight. It took my mom forcing me to into a size 16 from a 20 (because i was scared they wouldn't fit). And sometimes i don't see that i have changed at all. When i look in the mirror sometimes i still see the old me, the me that was over weight to the point of i didn't look like i had a neck. I don't recognize the person looking back at me sometimes. Although lots of people have said to me "you have lost so much weight! How did you do it?" The first time i realized that i really wasn't the fat girl any more was really two weeks ago when i took a pic with my daughter for the first time since i had surgery. Granted i cant fit in any of my old clothes but i do still try to wear them sometimes. I cant wear the pants clearly since i am in a size 11 now but i do still try to wear my old shirts size XXX L when really i can fit in a size XL and its loose. So why do i feel like i haven't lost anything?
The mirror is my worst enemy. I have no full length mirrors in my house all my mirrors are boob up mirrors. I did that because i didnt want to see anything below that before and i really had no reason to as long as my shoes matched. I know that i have lost weight, but when i saw that it was like wow! I kinda feel like i have cheated myself like i just woke up one morning and the weight that i see in the mirror was gone. I saw the scales but i guess in my mind i just didn't want to believe it. I really hope that i am not the only one that is feeling this way. I want to be able to see what everyone else sees but im not sure that i can ever see that.
I love wearing jeans that i can buy from jcp or the buckle or where ever i want and i love to be able to go in to any store and buy any shirt or under wear or bra that i want but i just want to see it for myself!
Any ways im not saying that i am not happy that i am getting health im just saying why can i not see it? Please someone tell me that you are having the same problem, that its not just me and im not just crazy,
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