I was told to write it all down and it would make me feel better...Well here it goes! All my life I was up and down in my weight but never considered myself to be obest..weighting in at about 150lbs my highschool year. Right out of highschool I was pregnant with my daughter and weighed near close to 225lbs. After delivery 199 seemed to be where I was at. I should have been more concerned as my weight started to go from 199 to 215 to 225 while trying every weightloss gimic out there.... 7 years into my weight gain..I had the biggest weightloss imaginable..lol I lost a 250lb husband (divorce) and about 30 lbs of my own. Funny cuz even at 199..or even 189 (Smallest Ive been since giving birth) I always had a gut I could just hide it better then, than I can now ..lol however I was in a size 8 (I'm 5'9 BTW) some may have even said I was too thin..of course I didn't think so..How did I loose that much weight and keep it off you ask? Strees Stress and more stress...Getting back into the relationship scene, I slowly started to get alittle too comfortable with myself and the weight (after 2 years of keeping it off) started to find itself back to me whether I wanted it too or not! age 36, 242 LBS..it could be worse right? I mean at least I wasn't 250 LBS..well just give me another 1/2 year Id get there... I decided to look into the lap band when I stepped in the scale and weighed in at 253 LBS..High closterol, High Blood Pressure, bad knees, bad back...I was convinced this was the only way to go. Found a clinic in my home town and Feb 1 2010, I went for a consultation. Did my psych test and nutrictional evals over the phone and March 26, 2010 went in for Surgery..**** I didn't even meet the Dr untill the day of...

It's been 2 years this month..I feel like it was just yesterday and I'm still learning and struggling..Lol I can't speak for others but in my opionion "this was a get thin quick"..or so I thought..I rememeber I use to tell my adjustment guy that I refuse to beleive that all those people on the commercials did EXACTLY what they were supose to do when they were supose to do it! How do you automaticlly just get UNLAZY? They say the band is a tool, to help you with the eating..you eat you full faster..you stop eating...well mines broke!..lol I know I need to do the things I am supose to I just think that my Dr forgot to fill my band with Motivation!...I am hopeing to find some sort of inspiration joining this group.

My day starts off with a cup ( or I should say Coffee Mug of coffee) breakfast? How am I supose to eat breakfast and drink coffee at the same time..I need my coffee so breakfast doen't exsist ( I know I know mistake). Computer, housecleaning, laundry, occasion trip to the store..continues my day By about 1 am decided that I should prolly eat something althougth I am not hungry..Really? I'm not hungry? tell that to my mouth! I eat so fast that I'm throwing up what looks to me like a ball of slim! Research... your body produces saliva to help break down your food the more you eat the more salvia builds up and has no where to go cuz your stomach is smaller so out it goes... Slow down? How do I do that? I have always eating this way... By dinner and soon there after I am looking for anything and everything that I am able to eat..to eat..and I say able to eat cuz we all know there are things that just don't mesh well with us anymore..some pasta, bread, bananas, grapes, But low and behold! I have NO PROBLEMS keeping cookies and Ice cream..anything sweet ( my weekness).. My adjustment guy explains to me that most things sweet disolve in you mouth there for there are no restrictions!.. Great who knew? besides my Dr!.

My current weight post surgery is 205...2 years and only 52 lbs lost...(Yes I know thats off alittle, cuz i gained a few)

I just resently went to see my Dr for the 2nd UNadjustment in the past 8 months...For a few months now Ive been having alot of heartburn..after the first scare (I got sick with fever, dehydration ) I was better for a few months and all the symptoms started up again only this time I was spitting up what looked to me to be coffee grounds, Dr says it's blood! Great! Now what? the blood could be 1 of a few things, bleeding ulcer..or stomach erosion.. After having me drink water and feeling pressure build up he rules out Erosion...Good for me no Surgery!!! But now what. Back on the bland diet and food diary (ugh) no NSAI's (bad back, knees mentioned before) and come back in a month! I ask again "What did I get myself into!...needless to say I'm not gonna give up...I'm gonna figure out a way to get thru this all without the strees and headach of when and what did I eat and how long did it take me to eat and how much protein have I had today!!! And hopefully reading other peoples experainces with help me make sence of this all!

I beat myself up because I know I need to take control!! It just hard..I have no paying job (I am a stay at home Mom) which means no insurance so I can't afford for these issues to get any bigger... Any suggestions? Diet wise, excersises for the Lazy...Good and inexpensive protein powders...horror stories so I don't feel alone!..lol