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Perserverance Or Stubborn?

♥LovetheNewMe♥

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post-47865-13813664389081_thumb.jpgI have always loved the early morning hours of the day. The time before the sun comes up, the house is quiet, every one is still asleep. This is my time of the day to just ly quietly in bed and reflect about the day ahead and plan. This is also the time of day that I can relect on how blessed I have been in my life, thanking God for my wonderful family and friends and for giving me the strength to handle almost anything that falls in my path. Now.....back to the present! (For those of you who do not know me, I had surgery October 2010) I had a fill two weeks ago, my idea. I must admit the past 2 weeks have been pure HELL! I did my 48 hours of liquids like I was instructed but unlike every other fill I was not able to go right back to solids after the initial 48 hours. (Note: after my second fill in May of last year I was over filled and had to have an unfill. I was unable to drink liguids let alone eat.) I had to progress my self through full liguids, to soft and than to solids. I almost gave in several times and was tempted to go back and say, "Take some Damn fluid out I want to EAT." But I didn't, I drank my protein, which I do not love, every day I would take my breakfast, lunch and dinner, take a few bites push it away and drink a protein drink. I didn't have reflux, I didn't throw up, liquids passed without any difficulty and I had no desire to eat. I didn't feel hungry, Not sure I understand why but after my fill this time everything tastes different, things I loved before my fill, I don't like or want. The past 3 days have been good, I have been able to eat solids for lunch and dinner. Breakfast is still a little touchy, I do a couple of bites but than just decide to drink a protein drink. Sadly I have not even enjoyed my Starbucks! May weekday ritual is always a "Triple Tall, Skinny Carmel Machiatto" I have tried several different lattes this week and after about drinking a third i just toss it. Tossing a $5 cup of coffee is pretty expensive so I think I will give up on them for a while. They just don't seem to taste good! Sorry Starbucks, I will hold on to my Gold card but I guess you won't be getting rich of me for a while. My goal for the upcoming week is to increase my calories and find something that tastes really good and yummy. I have only be averaging about 600 cal a day for about 2 weeks, so I have been faithfully taking my vitamans and adding protein when ever I can to increase the calories and make sure my hair doesn't fall out. I have lost 10 lbs since my fill, the 4 lbs I had gained and 6 additional lbs. So this morning I way in at a "skinny 165" cool.png Hope everyone has a Great Sunday. Adding a new pic, of me and the family at Christmas.

 

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I am so happy to read your post. I went to the doctor about 3 weeks ago. He was going to give me a fill but wanted to do it with the xray. When he had me drink the white stuff my esophagus was not working right. There was not spasms until the very bottom and than it just ballooned out. He removed what he put in there and left me where I was. I then went for a endoscopy, a few biopsies and nothing showed up. No bacteria in my stomach etc. Everything seemed great. Then two days later I'm feel completely filled. Maybe something got stuck in there or something but I don't think so because I have absolutely no pain. I've been having the same problems you have. Can't eat much, somedays I get home from work and have counted my calories up and have only eaten under 300 calories all day. I'm having a little problem drinking the fluids I need so I'm pushing that more than anything, including drinking protien drinks for meals instead of eating. Friday night I had reflux so bad that it kept me up all night. I had problems keeping it from getting in my lungs . . . some may have gone in since I got up with pressure on my chest. Felt like I was having an asthma attack but I knew it wasn't asthma. I had ear aches and a headache. My husband made me stay in bed the day and and I drank water and a little bit of tomato soup. Took my nexium by dumping it on my tongue instead of swallowing the capsul, everytime I layed down reflux would come up. Heck it even came when I was sitting or standing. I felt so bad that I knew that if I went to the doctor he would have put me in the hospital because I was so bad and dehydrated. The only thing that kept me from going to the doctor was the fact that with my insurance If I step foot in the emergency room my deductible is $600, so if the doctor is not in his office, I do not call him.

Saturday night when I had supper ate 4 wheat thins very slowly and drank some protient drink. Later when I went to bed I took my meds and layed down (with 3 pillows). As soon as I started to fall asleep the reflux came. All I could think of is that I was going to have another night like the night before. I came downstairs and forced everything out of my stomach that could come out. I'm sure the doctor would not like this but it was the only thing I could think to do. For the little I drank/ate I think everything was still in there, except some of the water. I then went to bed and low and behold I sleep the entire night (on 1 pillow) not reflux. Today I have taken it very slowly, and made sure then everything I have does not make me fill too full. Actually for breakfast I had about 1/2 cup tea and 5 tiny bites of a protien bar. Then I could tell it was time to stop.

I was ready to go to the doctor on Monday and have some taken out. I've never been really tight before. I didn't get any resistance at all for about the first year after my surgery even though my doctor was giving me a fill every 2 months. Now I am tight I am going to try and stick it out. My husband had lap band on month before I did in April of 2010 and he was tight after the 3rd fill. He lost all his weight the first year. I've continued to lose but only between 1/2 lb and 1 lb a week. He has been telling me I need to just go slow and try and stick it out.

I am so thankful for reading your post today, I really thought I was too tight and something was really wrong because I couldn't eat much at all. Now I think I will stick it out and even if I can only eat 4-5 hundred calories a day for a while I won't worry so much about it. For the first time I have lost 6 lbs in 3 weeks and that feels good, I really would like to keep up that pace for a long time. Thank you again.

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In response to comment above. Yes I am tight, but please notice in my blog I do not have REFLUX. I can pass liquids without any problem. The fact that you are sleeping elevated on pillows and have reflux makes me think you are to tight. I think you should call your surgeon if this continues and at least discuss the issues. Good luck !

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