I wrote this several days ago and posted it on my other Blog

Have you ever been ridiculed, have you ever been embarrassed. The last 15 years of my life has been very difficult, and I am not asking for anyone's sympathy but I just want it to be known. I know that I have no one to blame but myself. Addictions run in my family on both sides and I have an addictive personality. I am addicted to food. I have lost 2 sisters; my marriage broke up, one of my best friends passed away. I always turned to food for solace. In that time I have probably lost the same amount of weight that I currently weigh. I have 5 different size pants in my closet and 3 different sizes of shirts. I have exercised, done weight loss challenges, used Xenical, done the South Beach diet and starved myself.I no longer can ride rides at the amusement park, I can no longer fit in booths at restaurants. I have to shop in the big and tall stores. I need the extension belt when I am riding a plane also I cannot fit in the exit aisle seats. My knees kill me, I have problems going down stairs, and my back bothers me at times. My doctor tells me that one of the reasons I have reflux is due to my weight.

I need to get healthier, I need to get smaller. If I want to live more then the next 10 years I need to do this. Part of what is spurring it on is I will turn the age my father died at in exactly 1 month from today. Again I know I have no one to blame but myself and I am trying to get better.