No Regrets
I started this journey 7 months ago and yes it has been a journey. I had my appointment with my surgeon today, it was 4 weeks post a fill and slight unfill of .4 cc's. I had lost 10lbs since my last visit. I am down 56lbs since surgery now and have dropped from a size 24 to a size 14. I really am enjoying the new me, I went to the beach last week and actually was not embarrassed to wear a bathing suit. My husband and I had so much fun, it was great not to feel short of breath or have the pain in my knees I had the summer before. We road bikes, walked on the beach and had a wonderful time. It is the first time I can actually say I went on vacation and actually lost weight not gained weight. But back to my journey. This journey has had it's ups and downs, I have had to learn to listen to my body and what my band is telling me. Eating early in the morning is just not an option for me, I drink protein. I have learn to be creative with my protein drinks and use unflavored in my coffee or lattes from Star Bucks and call this breakfast. Unfortunately I was one of those people that thought weight loss surgery was a cop out, but believe me I have changed my opinion. This has been one of the hardest journeys of my life. It truly makes you learn to make healthy choices or pay the price. I have paid the price along the way when I have tried to eat pizza or pasta. Yes I can eat them but it is a painful process and they sit in my stomach like a piece of lead as the digest. I have found new loves, vanilla protein shakes with peanut butter powder, I consider this a treat, a little crushed ice to make it thick and I think I am drinking a milkshake. Yummy! One of my favorite desserts has always been German Chocolate Cake, last week I found, chocolaty coconut, Biggest Losers Protein Bars. I told my husband, you know you have crossed over to the other side when a protein bar is the best tasting thing you have eaten for a while. He thinks I am crazy most days, but is one of most devoted supporters. Life post lap band surgery is truly a journey and a new beginning to a better life. I ask my self daily, why did I wait so long to do this, I could have been so much further than I am. But honestly I was not ready emotionally. The emotional part of weight loss is probably the most difficult for all of us. I mourned the loss of food in the beginning and really did not realize how much I had used food as a coping mechanism until I could no longer use it as a crutch. Food has much less importance in my life now, I see it as nutrition for my body and not something to run to when I am frustrated. My family sometimes has difficulty dealing with my honesty and so do co workers, but if it is between me binging or purging my thoughts, the thoughts are coming out. I have learned in order to be successful in this journey, I must listen to my band and not to the emotional eater that hides in the shadows waiting for me to let my guard down and find a weak place in the armor. I will not fail in this journey, this is for me, I do love the new me and I love the commitment I have made to myself to give this journey 100% of my ability to succeed. As I continue I need to challenge myself to increase my exercise. Actually I need to get off my butt and exercise daily. I am making a pledge to myself today to increase my activities by taking the steps instead of the elevator, walk from my car to my office instead of taking the shuttle, spend 20 minutes each day doing some type of physical activity. I will be successful in this journey!
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