I don't know what it is about the band and my cycle, but everything seems to be really off kilter since the surgery. I have been using birth control for years since being diagnosed with polycystic ovaries, so my cycle has been somewhat regular. After surgery, I had breakthrough bleeding for the first time in years that lasted for almost two weeks. I was so scared I went to my GYN, but she said everything was fine. She said it was the IV antibiotics and the stress from surgery that threw me out of whack.

This month has been the worst yet. I've had cramps, fatigue, breakouts, and horrible chocolate cravings. I feel like a teenager again. It's almost like the birth control stopped working or something. The mood swings are terrible too...my poor fiance doesn't know how I'll be from one minute to the next. I thought I'd grown out of all this nonsense years ago, but here it is again to make one week out of the month miserable. I'm hoping my body will adjust and I'll go back to normal, but right now it's just hard to deal with on top of all the other things that have changed in my life recently. I'm just scared that these cravings for chocolate will throw my weight loss in reverse and all my hard work will be for nothing. I know I'd have to eat an awful lot of chocolate for that to happen, but one bad decision usually leads to another with me. I'm trying to stay strong and not fall off the wagon completely like I have so many other times. This time it's different though. I'm not technically on a diet anymore. I'm using the band as a tool to help me make good decisions and keep my portions and hunger under control. I know it will help keep me strong where my willpower failed me so many times. I'm just having a brief moment of weakness and need to acknowledge it so I won't go back to my "all or nothing" attitude that I've always had about weight loss. Maybe this PMS junk is just a test to show how strong I've become since having the surgery and that I will continue to succeed no matter what. I can and will lose this weight and keep it off for good this time. For my health, my self esteem, and my well being. I can do this!