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Do I DESERVE to get banded?

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bmendoRNurse

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Well here is the truth!! I am 28y/o female that weighs 304Ibs. I have a wonderful husband, and sadly no kids yet! I have struggled with my weight all my life. I was even called by some a gordita but always with affection and the crazy thing is I embraced it. I was always the one who was told " you are so beautiful and just think if you could lose a little more weight how much more beautiful you would be". Well years past and a few years ago I became an LPN and my husband supported my decision to continue in school to become a RN. All through my marriage of almost 5years I was in school. So 2010 was a year of completion for me. I started working at a wonderful hospital, and fortunately for me I found out that they had a weight management center that offered bariatric surgery to employees that carried hospital insurance. (They have a deal worked out with Humana). I contacted the weight loss center and attended a band seminar October 2010 only a few months after I statred working there and the rest is history. The month of January as flown bye with EKG, EGD, Psy consult, medical consult, surgical consult. And my last month of three months of required supervised weight loss with a total loss of 9pounds. As of today I have realized that I am scared that I won't be able to eat some of the foods I enjoy now, so I find myself eating every thing right now only weeks before getting banded. I start the 17th on my liver reduction diet. So I only have the next few days to eat what I want. In a way I feel really bad about this attitude that towards food that I have been having lately. And exercise!!! What’s that? That is another thing that I have been sucking at also. It is freezing outside and I have no gym membership because I have been saving for my personal trainer that I am hiring for after the band. I feel like I am putting aot of faith into other things like the PT and the "band" instead of myself. A few days ago I went to my GYN doc because I was have abnormal bleeding issues and she said after viewing my ultrasound that my female parts look great and the abnormal bleeding is caused by this increased weight and that when I am ready to have babies again when I am down to a healthy size (that’s a whole different blog) she see no problem in me getting pregnant. I guess I really feel like this whole bariatric surgery has just been handed to me and I am not doing "my part" pre-banded. I guess I now understand when people say its the fear of the unknown that causes the most fear. I have no idea what i am to be feeling right now!!!

 

 

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hmmm sounds familiar!! I think that if we could do this on our own we would have a long time ago and there would be no need for bariatric surgery. Yes we have to do most of the work but there is a reason the band exists...it helps, it is a tool just like any other that can make that work a little more productive. I seem to be on an "last meal" mentality too and I haven't even had my first consult. Makes me wonder if I am mentally ready for it but truth be told it seems to be a very common phenomenon from what I have read on here and on other blogs. Food is such a big part of my life I think there is going to be a mourning period for me.

BTW have you looked into Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome?? Sounds like your doc gave you a watered down explanation for the infertility that affects so many obese women., and there is more to it than just the "lady parts" it affects insulin levels too which makes it easier to gain and harder to lose.

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I did the same thing with food. For a whole month before surgery, I went to all my favorite restaurants and pigged out. I actually gained 10 pounds. Every meal was the last time I was going to eat that. I think I actually went into mourning. I now realize there is no last time. I am working really hard right now to get to my goal weight but I will eat all of those foods again in the future, only in smaller quantities. You definitely "deserve" to lose weight. We all do.

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I think your eating everything is normal we all did that... now what you need to do is figure out your underlying issues with food and why it's a comfort, etc...

If you're like me, you'll be able to eat anything you want after being banded, just not as much of it. There's the list of "No"s they'll give you but I will tell you my list of "No"s changes with EVERY FILL and one fill I can't eat bread, the next fill I can etc..

If you're serious about it then go ahead, it's not being "handed" to you.. you've been blessed with it, everything for a reason. Receive it and do the most with it.

Now if you REALLY feel like you're not serious about it then wait and get the counseling you need or you'll end up a band failure, because as I'm sure you know it's just a tool, it doesn't do the work for you. And you need to resolve the true issue, counseling will help with that.

Keep us posted and best of blessings to you!

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I was just like you! My last meal was everything I thought I couldn't have before. I binged and gained 10 pounds in just a few weeks from eating everything I thought I couldn't have again. Since surgery 9/30/10, I have been able to eat anything I want, just in normal portions. Also, I had abnormal bleeding to. Just in losing 35 pounds has already helped sooooo much with that! I wish you the best of luck in everything and don't be scared at all. The first few days of your diet will be the worst then you will be okay with it. I started at just over 325 and and have lost almost 35 pounds. I'm a slow loser, but it feels good knowing it will never come back!

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I am not on any special diet. I was banded 8 months ago. I eat what I want but like QTNEY1, in normal or smaller portions. There are some off limits foods because they cause issues and steak, being one of them, was my all time fave but that's okay. I can deal with that. It takes a while but eventually you can get back to normal. I was 350 lbs and I am down 91 lbs in 8 months. I know my weightloss is not the norm. My surgeon said if I lose 40 lbs a year I would be doing great. I guess I am rocking it! It has been a blessing. It's a tool and you need to treat it as such. It is not a miracle but it is fantastic when used right.

I hate exercise and I don't exercise not that I am proud of that. I really need to because I have tons of excess skin. Now that a good chunk of weight is off I plan on starting but that is still a work in progress.

You are lucky your insurance paid for it. Mine didn't so I am self pay. Don't take that for granted. You are truly lucky so embrace it!

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hmmm sounds familiar!! I think that if we could do this on our own we would have a long time ago and there would be no need for bariatric surgery. Yes we have to do most of the work but there is a reason the band exists...it helps, it is a tool just like any other that can make that work a little more productive. I seem to be on an "last meal" mentality too and I haven't even had my first consult. Makes me wonder if I am mentally ready for it but truth be told it seems to be a very common phenomenon from what I have read on here and on other blogs. Food is such a big part of my life I think there is going to be a mourning period for me.

BTW have you looked into Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome?? Sounds like your doc gave you a watered down explanation for the infertility that affects so many obese women., and there is more to it than just the "lady parts" it affects insulin levels too which makes it easier to gain and harder to lose.

Hello,

I thought for the longest time i had PCOS but my MD did an ultrasound, there are no cyst and the rest of my female anatomy was fine. She told me it was the extra weight was causing my body to produce to much estrogen. I am very thankful that God has given me health thus far in my life. Diabetes run heavy in my family and i am not even borderline. That is one reason i am ready for this extra tool in my life to help me loss this weight.

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I BLEW IT OUT, in the last days before my surgery. Yes, they told me not to eat a bunch of junk, but I did anyway. I had to give all that food a fond farewell because I knew if would be the last time I'd eat it. And, I'd love to tell you that I regretted that, but I don't. I relished every bite and I was ready to make a change! It's normal, no biggie. However, after my banding I turned over a whole new leaf. I stuck to my post op diet, religiously, and even decided to give up sugar while I was at it. I used to say that I'd NEVER give up sugar,but it's a "trigger food" for me and it just wasn't worth the hassle. Oddly....VERY ODDLY, this just isn't that big of a deal anymore. I make it through holidays and birthdays cakeless and goodieless and I don't really miss it. My new life is way worth any sacrifice.

And, I think you're just being honest about how giving up your favorite foods makes you feel. Hopefully, the rewards of losing the weight will be enough for you to realize that, "it's just food." I think, though, probably what you're anxious about, even though you may not realize it, is how you're going to manage life without being able to "use" those foods. If you're like most of us, the food is a coping mechanism and a companion. You must find other ways to cope. Know that there will be hard times and stressful times and that "friend" won't be there. You'll actually have to face situations...YUK! But, you can do it. You can. Oh, and find something you like to do more than eat, then when you find yourself wanting to eat out of habit or boredom, do that thing. Learn to knit, paint, basket weave, weld, work on cars, whatever.

P.S (What drew me to you post in the first place...) Yes, you deserve to be banded. We all deserve that chance. We all deserve to be happy.

Best of luck and celebrate every lost ounce,

Wendy

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