Okay, so I admit it. I've been too tight for 1 year and 9 months. Wow I can't believe it's been that long. Always feeling uncomfortable after eating, vomiting often. I cannot remember the last day I went without vomiting at all - all day. Its become such a normal part of my life. But so incredibly embarrassing. I hate eating out with anyone. I know what's coming - quick run to the bathroom, trying to act normal, feigning a small bladder - I'm sick of it. Looking back I'm frustrated that I took this long to go fix this - have fluid out. Well, no, I understand why I haven't - shame. But I still wish I'd gone in sooner. I'm to the point I'm afraid of food. I look at food and can tell how quickly it will come right back up. I can't eat this, I can't eat that. No raw vegitables, most raw fruits aren't even an option, no bread, and most meat is out the window (down the toilet). Doesn't leave you with much that works. Chips, frappes, cheese, liquids, not very healthy.

So Saturday I starting on an antibiotic for a sinus infection, and my stomach took exception to it. The antibiotic irritated my stomach, making the lining inflamed. Between already being too tight, irritation from vomiting, and the antibiotic inflaming tissue, I effectively swelled shut. Or nearly so. All I could get down was think liquid and even that was very slow and not a sure thing. By Monday I was miserable. I called for an appointment and they got me in Tuesday afternoon. I had 7cc in my band. We took out 2cc, but the test water would still just pretty much sit there - not going down. We took out another 2cc, and water was still slow but moving - and I need to finish my antibiotic. So we decided to just take out the last 3cc. So I'm down to no fluid in my band. I'm to finish my round of antibiotics and let me stomach recover. In two weeks I go back and they will put 3-4cc back in, and we'll go from there.

I feel so much better since having the fluid out. I stood in my kitchen for a long time last night enjoying a cup of water. How great if felt to actually feel cold water go through. Amazing. Relief.

Now I have to be careful. Once the swelling goes down, I'll basically have no restriction. The theory of the next two weeks - besides healing - is regaining some confidence in being able to eat solid foods. But I can't let it get crazy. I'm going to my lap band support group tomorrow night. I haven't been in probably as long as I've been too tight, so almost 2 years. They are doing a starting over type thing for starting the New Year. So I'm starting over.........