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Angry much?

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drae0879

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:angry:<FONT face="Comic Sans MS">So I finally start this whole process of preparing mentally, physically and emotionally for finally winning this war of my flub and all I have been hearing from everyone around me is negativity. The main thing I am hearing is how I dont need the surgery, that I'm not "big". Uhhuh. Right, because fitting in a size 16/18 is healthy for me? Oh and my knee is the size of a softball from arthritis swelling not because of my weight but from some other issue? Not so much. I'm frustrated. I'm angry and hurt. Why is it so hard for people to be either neutral and not say anything or maybe a little good luck! on your journey? Sheesh. I have my date for surgery on December 14th and I'm finding my mood to be more on the darker side than I expected. I'm not sure why. The only thing I can think of is I'm disappointed its so far away? I can not begin to explain how I do not want to feel like a failure, especially to my child. She is going to be 12 and I don't know how to tell her mommy is having surgery because she can't get skinny on her own. This all stems back to my coworkers telling me I don't need the surgery and my daughter feeling (possibly) that I am a failure for needing surgery. Its not like I WANT to be sliced open! :angry: My Lord! Not everyone is so negavtive about this though. My mom started telling me to get the surgery when my BMI was about a 30.
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The surgery will go fine for you. Its a very simple proceedure and you will only have some slight soreness and some gas pains for a few days. Its not that big of a deal. Im he same size you are and I heard the same things. Im 7 weeks post-op now and I have not lost one pound. Thats abnormal and Im sure you will do better than me. Im doing all the right things according to my doc but I think my body just wants to be fat. My best advise to you is to not get your mind set on losing weight very fast. I thought by now I would have lost 10 lbs and all I have done was gain 5! Its a very long and slow process. Even after a fill Im still not losing weight. With that being said Im sure this will end up being a good decision for both of us. Just keep your head clear, your body healthy, and your spirits up.

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Your not doing this for your co-workers, so ignore them. I have people like that around me like that too. "are you sure this is safe?" my response a hell of alot safer than carring around an extra 60 lbs. Don't give up or feel negative, thats what they want, people like failure its easier to talk about. Try a support group, you'll meet new friends. I thought I would never do that , and now I look forward to going to more! Good luck

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I've not had weight loss surgery but I've been thin and mostly overweight for my 60 years. I think you are brave to take such a step and obviously you have thought it through thoroughly. There never is a perfect decision and it is truly your very personal journey. You deserve support for your decisions but there will be those who will impose their own ideas, views, experiences and tell you what you don't want to hear. Try to remember it is your life and your journey; try to tune out others who are negative and stick with true friends who support you no matter what. Try not to share your personal feelings with others who have no clue and can't offer support. Above all be brave and be a positive role model for your daughter: meaning that this decision is not a perfect one, it will have its trials but it is yours and that is good enough. Trust yourself and follow through...if you change your mind, ok, so what: if you regret it, so what: you made the right decision for you at the right time. Just move on and realize you are part of the human race. Good wishes to you, dear one, I'm excited for you.

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To avoid all this I did not tell my coworkers or hardly anyone. I foresaw what would happen if I did. I also weighed 190 lbs and the few people who knew about my lap band consideration thought I was crazy and not a candidate at my weight. I had tried every single diet and nothing worked. When I hit the big 40, I am currently 41, everything, including my weight, went beserk on me. The best decision that I have made in a long time is getting the lap band. As of today, I am 40 lbs lighter and 15 lbs away from my goal. I am wearing a size 9/10 and sometimes 7/8. I am also wearing size medium tops. Who would've believed! My co-workers and clients are in awe and asking telling me how wonderful I look and asking me what diet i am following. I just smile and tell them, " I'm just exercising and eating right." I felt I didn't need to be scrutinized every step of the way, so I decided to keep it under wraps and I'm really glad I did.

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