"Up in the air" sums up recent events around my house. My son is going through a period of distress which affects all of us. We have hopes for a quick and satisfactory conclusion, but it has been disconcerting and upsetting to watch events unfold. My daughter is working her way through her last year of high school and her first semester of college simultaneously. Coming to terms with having her go away to college in a very few months is proving more difficult than I thought it would be. I'm not such a hoovering bird mom that I fear an empty nest, but she is good company and my husband and I will miss her.

In May I retired from being a legal assistant specializing in civil litigation. I have not missed it for a single minute, though not having the regular extra paycheck each pay period has made a difference in our household budget. I now write for a local newspaper as well as continuing to teach dance and needlework design. These are far more congenial occupations for me than the law, but I am still learning to balance my life between work and the demands of a family that doesn't seem to grasp that I do work even though I don't go to an office each day.

To complicate matters just a little more, I am dealing with personal health issues, some of which must be dealt with ASAP and others that can be put off for a few years if I'm lucky. The biggest one and the one that affects my weight loss program the most is a problem with my thyroid. A biopsy came back negative, but the nodules are still suspicious enough that my doctor says the left lobe of my thyroid needs to come out. I see the surgeon who did my lapband surgery on Thursday and will ask when he can do this latest surgry. If solving my thyroid problems means I will quit being cold, constantly sleepy, dried out, hoarse, etc., I will be glad to do it. I also can't help but wonder if it will kick up the speed of weight loss.

As of last week, I was down to 196 pounds. I have lost weight much more slowly than many people who have lap bands, but have been mostly content with my progress. I go through periods when I eat the wrong things or between meals, none of which does me any good, but which hasn't totally derailed me, either. The last couple of weeks have been more off track than usual because of an almost unconscious return to stress eating. Well, I'm conscious of it now, so can start to do something about it.

Dang. Don't you hate it when you become fully cognicent of a bad habit and can no longer indulge in it with impunity? :thumbup:

On the up side of life, I've had the pleasure of packing up my size 22s for the consignment shop and shopping for interim clothes in the misses section instead of in the plus sizes. I don't want to buy a lot because I intend to shrink out of it by this time next year. On the other hand, wearing clothes that hang off my shoulders is inconvenient, unflattering, and not much fun. My favorite purchase was a pair of size 15-16 Wrangler Jet jens. I feel positively (dare I say it??) normal again.

I am still about forty pounds from where I'd like to be, but I am over halfway to my somewhat vague goal. If I can level out between 155 and 165, I'll be content. When I started this lapband venture, the dietician at the hospital told me that on average people lost about half of what they wished to lose. I have to aim at not being average, then, because I am not ready to give up yet, getting side-tracked occasionally not withstanding.

That being said, I am very happy with my new jeans and my newly recovered ability to get on my horse without a mounting block. I intend to enjoy each weight milestone along the way, without obsessing over how fast I'm losing or where exactly I'm going. I spent a lot of years trying to stay at or reach some magic number on the scale, and it just didn't work for me.

I do have concerns that I've perhaps stretched my mini-stomach out in recent weeks. Just happened to come across an old but now ressurrected thread on the forum about this subject that gave me some information I need for my next step. Don't see any reason to have a barium test to find out if my mini-stomach is stretched or not. If its true, then a week or so of liquids will help; if it's not true, a few days of full liquids won't hurt me. Either way, it'll be a chance to revamp my committment to this way of life.