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Negative family and friends?

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Noturningback15

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I am having issues with some of my family members making remarks to my sister and me about losing weight. We both had lapband surgery about two weeks apart and we are so excited to be going through this journey together. Several of our relatives have made comments like “don’t get too small” or “XL will be too small for you and I don’t think you need to get that small” What are you serious an XL shirt is too small? It’s like they have seen us so big our entire lives and cannot wrap it around their brains that we are losing weight and may be smaller one day. I told a friend that my dream size wedding dress was 12 and she was said “you will never be a 12 sorry to tell you”! She tried to back track it and say she meant that my bone structure isn’t made for a size 12. LMBO! How does she know what my bones look like under 200 pounds of extra weight!!! By the way we are no longer friends because that wasn’t the first negative remark she has made. At that time I weighed 373 and I guess she couldn’t see me smaller either. Well, I am going to do this and no matter what anyone thinks I am going to lose weight!!! Does anybody else have issues or stigmas in their family that see skinny or even normal as a negative? My goal weight is 199 and that is not near being skinny.

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Yes, I truly understand that one!! I haven't seen any of my non-immediate family members in almost a month and I am feeling way much better about myself. For some reason I feel like they are always sizing me up when I go home to visit (I moved 2 hrs away).

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I say hold onto support, release all negativity.

Note: A size 12 wedding dress is in the 135-148 pound range. Wedding dresses run small! Don't kill yourself for a number on a dress. Depending on your height 199 will be between a 14-18 and BEAUTIFUL!

I'm 5'7 and at 194 still wore a tight 16!

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I say hold onto support' date=' release all negativity.

Note: A size 12 wedding dress is in the 135-148 pound range. Wedding dresses run small! Don't kill yourself for a number on a dress. Depending on your height 199 will be between a 14-18 and BEAUTIFUL!

I'm 5'7 and at 194 still wore a tight 16![/quote']

Yea, I remember my sister wore a size 14 but had to get a 18 and she was so sad!!! But, I figured I will be a real size 14/18 at 199 (5'5 1/2) and a size 18 wedding dress probably, but she still didn't have to shatter my dream. LOL! Yea, I would have to be a size 8 prob to get in a 12 wedding dress. IDK?

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I don't even listen anymore to comments like that. Certain things hurt my feelings at first, but I'm doing this for me and I'm as happy as can be. I control that! :) Good luck to you and I hope your journey brings a TON of WONDERFUL new people into your life.

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I remember before my band and my weight loss, I would desperately try to be happy for my friends that were losing weight. The problem was it made me feel even more like a fat a*&& loser because I COULDNT lose the weight! I was never hateful or negative because I was proud for them but it did make me just feel all the more inadequate because I couldn't. I promise you if I can do this, any one on the planet could do it. I am so blessed and feel so much better. I was 258 now 162. Try not to get your feelings hurt, keep on going and do what you have to do to be healthy. Not all of us are built to be a size 2 no matter what but we can all become healthier and get some of that weight off and Yes I believe you can do it girl. You CAN get in that 12. Remember NOTHING I mean NOTHING tastes as good as skinny feels. GOod luck and God bless.

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Thanks Loseit and NewMechelle!!!! Congrats on both of your weight loss! I can't wait until I get out of the 300's! I get excited every time I think about it. I am getting ready to go to the gym right now because yall have motivated me to work even harder!!!! Lol!!

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You have such a beautiful face now, its such a shame that we overweight can't get it in our head that we might just be beautiful whatever our size. But, I will be banded on 9-28 and can't weight. It's my only hope for better health. Be sure and post a picture when you get married in that size 12, bet you'll make a beautiful bride.

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Have some haters in my life. Some actually I don't spend much time with some of them anymore. I just don't want to deal with it. Others (my mom in particular) I either ignore their comments or remind her over and over to stop with the negative. The other day I told her if she couldn't stop it I couldn't go visit at Thanksgiving. I just can't deal with it.

Hugs!!!!

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kick the negative people to the curb! You dont need the negativity! You, and your sister, have taken a HUGE step in getting yourselves healthy for the rest of your lives! Congratulations on that!

People who dont understand why we want to be thinner, will never get it - and you dont have to explain yourself to anyone on this earth. keep it up, and I wish you and our sister good health, and awesome clothes as you shed the pounds!

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You have such a beautiful face now, its such a shame that we overweight can't get it in our head that we might just be beautiful whatever our size. But, I will be banded on 9-28 and can't weight. It's my only hope for better health. Be sure and post a picture when you get married in that size 12, bet you'll make a beautiful bride.

Thanks, I hope your surgery goes well and it is a success for you!!

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Have some haters in my life. Some actually I don't spend much time with some of them anymore. I just don't want to deal with it. Others (my mom in particular) I either ignore their comments or remind her over and over to stop with the negative. The other day I told her if she couldn't stop it I couldn't go visit at Thanksgiving. I just can't deal with it.

Hugs!!!!

Wow, and I bet Thanksgiving is going to be ruff on a lot of new bandster. I am so use to getting stuffed!! I hope it gets better with your mom. I would love to have my mom here for support but she passed away in 07. You are blessed to have her.

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kick the negative people to the curb! You dont need the negativity! You' date=' and your sister, have taken a HUGE step in getting yourselves healthy for the rest of your lives! Congratulations on that!

People who dont understand why we want to be thinner, will never get it - and you dont have to explain yourself to anyone on this earth. keep it up, and I wish you and our sister good health, and awesome clothes as you shed the pounds![/quote']

LOL! I am dreaming of awesome clothes! I love shopping!! I think I am going to get shoes and purses to match each outfit! LOL!

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Awe gurl!! Its all talk.HATER's!!! I say..you learn to bypass all that negitave stuff. Your going if not already! start to feel and looking good, all that talk it not going to phase you.Just keep on doing what your doing..Best of luck to both of you..Best choice I ever made.Stay Strong!

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Hi :)

OMG! I know exactly what you are talking about! Haters are out there and they love to talk tons of Sh*t!!! My mother in law asked me "oh girl what size are you trying to get too"? I said I'm not sure but my dream is like 160. She laughed and laughed and was like "you can never be that small you aren't built for it". The thing is she was serious I don't even think she was being mean just hating without knowing...And my sister in laws got real defensive when they found out I was having the band done. They were all like, "its not cute to be small and I would never want to lose my shape". I mean I don't want to either, I think 160 will be perfect, but who says something like that. And then I have come across the mean ones who are like "how long is that gonna last and oh we'll see or what about your skin is it just gonna hang there". Girl I say prove them all wrong!!! LOL Thats all we can do! You will do and look great! Good luck and keep us updated. :)

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Awe gurl!! Its all talk.HATER's!!! I say..you learn to bypass all that negitave stuff. Your going if not already! start to feel and looking good, all that talk it not going to phase you.Just keep on doing what your doing..Best of luck to both of you..Best choice I ever made.Stay Strong!

Thanks i am going to keep going...I got that size XL shirt in my room right now for some motivation!! LOl!

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Hi :)

OMG! I know exactly what you are talking about! Haters are out there and they love to talk tons of Sh*t!!! My mother in law asked me "oh girl what size are you trying to get too"? I said I'm not sure but my dream is like 160. She laughed and laughed and was like "you can never be that small you aren't built for it". The thing is she was serious I don't even think she was being mean just hating without knowing...And my sister in laws got real defensive when they found out I was having the band done. They were all like' date=' "its not cute to be small and I would never want to lose my shape". I mean I don't want to either, I think 160 will be perfect, but who says something like that. And then I have come across the mean ones who are like "how long is that gonna last and oh we'll see or what about your skin is it just gonna hang there". Girl I say prove them all wrong!!! LOL Thats all we can do! You will do and look great! Good luck and keep us updated. :)[/quote']

That is so mean spirited for people to just laugh in your face like that!!! I have learned to keep my goals to myself and my sisters because everybody else got something negative to say or think it's funny! I am going to prove everybody wrong including myself! To be honest at first I couldn't see myself in a size XL shirt either after being in 4X and 5X's for so long. But, now that I am down to a 3X and it's getting roomy I can see it now!!

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been real with you when you were in your 5x and 4x clothes you should have told them to kiss your 5x ass, and now that your're in an 3x tell them to kiss your 3x ass and when you get to your size 12 tell them to kiss your little ass, they sound like my sisther-in- law putting dwn my wife when she had her surgery, she went from an size 24 to an 14-12. and now they are going to have the surgery, friend girl dnt worry about them as lone as you believe in yourself fuck the rest. and that real. myself i got band on the 27th of aug. started out weigh in at 345 now im dwn to 319. loving my band, havent had my 1st fill yet. keep doing what you're doing good luck

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My family is the same way...I was just venting on this subject earlier. They said it would never happen, that I wouldn't be a size 12...well guess what. I DID IT! (still losing too) Although my family takes it one step further by announcing to total strangers that I had Lapband surgery and "you should have seen her before" that comment gets under my skin the most...like I was some unsightly monster or something. Go get em' girl and remember your doing this for YOU! Damn Haters...ughhh

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