I had surgery for vanity reasons only. I was tired of being fat.

I also tell everyone, in my experience, fit and thin people have been much more supportive than other obese people, men are generally more supportive than women so you might really be cutting out a big group of supporters by not telling your coworkers. Especially when you start losing and feel more like exercising, if you have athletes to go to for advice that would be really helpful.

My husband called me last week, he had found a old camera memory card with pictures on it and was so excited. He called to tell me "You were fat!" I said "Yeah, I know." and he said "I didn't know! I knew you were overweight but I didn't realize you were fat!" Your husband will probably feel that way in a year too. Remember, love is blind. He just wants you to be safe, he will come around.

I had surgery for a combo of reasons. One being vanity the other was because I have PCOS and the extra weight will hinder me trying to get pregnant when I decide I want to try. Also, my family history....I am trying to avoid diabetes, heart disease, cancer, stroke, you name it...I was given a bad set of genes.

Anyways, you will have to decide if you want to tell anyone. I told everyone....I figured it would make me more accountable and I was also hopeful I would inspire others. Some days....I wish I hadn't told anyone but close family and friends. This is mostly because people are ignorant and I mean literally ignorant about the band. They don't understand. I have a guy that sits behind me in the choir at church that asks me every week how much I have lost and if the have me "cinched" all the way up yet. He even does a hand motion of squeezing when he says cinched. He keeps asking why I haven't lost more...he just truely doesn't understand.

No one at work has said much about it at least I haven't heard them say anything. My grandmother was absolutely against it. She asked prayer for me before I had surgery that God would open my eyes and make me come to my senses. This was at church in a very rural little community so I am faily confident the whole county knew by then end of the evening. She still begs for my mom to make me have it taken out. She told my mom I could just have it taken out and then quit eating and I would lose weight.

Because of the PCOS my weight loss has been super slow but hey...when was the last time I have lost 40 lbs and kept it off? I have just learned to ignore negative people in regards to the band and dismiss it to the fact that they just don't understand. I mean...how many of these negative people have ever battle a weight issue....NONE is my case.

Good luck and remember you have a whole supportive family on this website....everyone has been great to me!

Like you, I too decided not to tell anyone besides my parents and best friend. I have yo-yo dieted throughout the years and it took me quite a few months to decide to go through with this surgery. I am a full-time single mom and my main consideration was my 10 year old son. I am all he has and I want to be around for him as long as God permits. I was always athletic and into sports. Now I found myself too tired too participate in many activities with my son and only attend professional sporting events with him. Within 2 weeks, I visited my surgeon and planned my surgery. My surgery was totally out of pocket, so I didn't have to deal with the insurance hassles and delays. Thank God I could afford it.

My co-workers and clients comment on how I've lost weight and how great I'm looking. They all want to know how I'm doing it. All I tell them is diet and exercise. I am watching what I eat (they keep an eye on me at work) and I work out on my Elliptical. When I had surgery I was out for about 5 days. I told everyone I was having laproscopic surgery to have ovarian cysts removed. I feel good about the decision of keeping a low key. You are the one who needs to feel good about yourself and your decision. Sure I want to look good, but most importantly, I want to be around time to see my son grow up to be the Attorney he says he's going to be and see my grandchildren be born.

Good luck! God Bless!

I didn't share the information with anyone buy my husband and my mom until a month afterwards. We went to dinner with family and I finally shared . .. the first thing someone said was, "cheater". That's why I didn't share before surgery . . I only wanted support - not hassles. Now people know and they've been supportive.

I think I could cry for you guys that have such critics around you. It really does make me sad that you have to feel this conflict. This is something you did for yourself for goodness sake!

I thought about it over 2 years, probably longer. My process started in late April and I had surgery on 7/27. I was able to take 2 weeks off work and loved every minute of it. I told a handful of people at work and everyone was excited and still cheer me on. My family knows and is very supportive... Basically I declared 2010 the Year of Me - it has turned out pretty good.

BUT After coming back from work (Wall Street brokerage firm) I figure out that my boss (use the term loosely since he is a wonderful man that I am close to for 15 years) has told just about all our best clients where I was and what I did!! AND they are mostly retired doctors!! When they call in they ALWAYS ask me how I am feeling and are happy when I tell them that I am doing great. YIKES! No Pressure!

I hope that everyone out there can remember that the decision is theirs and they are doing it to improve their quality of life - whether it be medically, emotionally or for vanity's sake. Let this be a time to focus on YOU.

I told all my family and friends that i am having the procedure in Oct. I have not had one negative comment, they are all really supportive. I have also told my co-workers and have had the same reaction there.

This is a decision i have made for me! I don't care if anyone does react negatively - this is for me and me alone! I won't avoid it once i start loosing weight either, if anyone asks how i am doing it - i will be honest. If they don't like it - that's their problem.

Sonny

I completely know how you feel! One of my closest friends is a personal trainer / nutritionist / exercise physiologist and I haven't told her I'm getting Lap-Band done yet. I dieted with her as my coach about a year ago (she was working me out 4x/week and coached me on food) and had some mild success (15 lbs lost) which I've since gained back plus another 20 lbs. I feel like I'm at my wits end and LB is my last resort.... but I can't tell her I'm doing this because she's going to lecture me on it. Sigh!

I FACEDBOOKED IT!!! nothing but support from family and friends..Gurl!!! it really sucks that your 1# support that you really need is not there for you. The reason why you still can't seem to tell anyone is because your not getting that ONE support that mean everything to you from your Husband lets hope he comes around and Im sorry but I really dont think that this tool is a Cop-Out..its a tool you still have to watch what you eat you still have to excirsie.I was banded in march 2010 and went in weighing 295 I am only 4.9 and im down to 226 going to the gym everyday 1hr 1/2 workout,eatting the right meals. Before my surg I was going to the gym everyday and thought I was eatting right and the weight was not comming off for years Ive been trying.I am 42 and it dosnt get any easier to drop the weight.How many people do you know that had gone on extrem diet and have drop the weight even on TV you see it and what! and a couple of months go bye and you gain the wieght back double try that every year in five years tripled your wieght back and some.If you beleave in yourself and addmit to yourself that you cant do this alone then everything will fall into place. Yea, your always going to get those few people that will comment and try to prove to you that they dont NEED A TOOL to lose the wieght but hey to each its own..Dido on grigg4's blog.You know what matters the most to me is that IM FEELING HELL-A GOOD!!! and that should be all that matters..I really wish you the best of luck keep us posted.

hserra: OMG!!! your story sound so much like mine... I'm scheduled for 09/22 and took vacation instead of sick leave from work because I didn't want people to ask. I haven't even told my best friend because not sure how she would react. My parents know and that's because my mom was the one that also suggested it because just like you one of her friends had it done and is doing well. But my mom also told my brother which I didn't want her to do because my brother can be pretty critical and doesn't understand why I can't loose the wait by exercising and watching what I eat. My husband is supportive but just wants me to realize what I am getting into..

I don't have an answer for you why society is the way it is... I went to a vitamin store the other day to get my viatamins and protein drink and I had to finally break down and tell the girl what I needed the things for because I needed her help. I think in today's society they don't realize that being obese is a disease just like any other one and we need help (they I think are being more aware of it now).

And yes you are right, I too want to be healthy and do things with my children but I also want to look good...

Good Luck and I know your will do fine... Thanks goodness for this support...