Up one and a half pounds this week. I suspect half is due to the amount of ice cream I ate during this hot week and the other half is the water I am retaining, also due to the heat.

My next goal is 200 by Labor Day with 4.5 pounds to go. I think I can do it and if I don't make it by Labor Day, surely the week after. I am not going to obsess. I am not going to obsess. I am not going to...

There is something about approaching a goal that panics me into making decisions that look calculated for failure. I can't think of the number of times I have been within a few pounds of a long-desired goal only to have my weight creep steadily upward. Obviously there is no one around to sabotage me but myself and I wonder why on earth I do it.

Time to speak firmly but lovingly to myself:

Look, Llyra, honey, I think you are getting into a panic because obtaining something you want very much implies that you can also lose that thing once you have it. Is it really less painful to give up within site of a goal and watch it slip away than it is to obtain that goal and fear eventually losing it?

I know, I know, this is a lifelong pattern with you in everything from business success to weight loss success: you get within inches of the top of the heap and voluntarily slide back down. Well, there is no reason why you can't change a pattern that you've outgrown and that serves no purpose except to frustrate you. It's not like dipping below 200 pounds is something you've never done before- did it hurt the other times you did it? No, it felt pretty good.

The very idea also induces a panicky fear of not being able to reach the goal and that is what you need to deal with now. Okay. Take a deep breath. Blow it out. Another. Blow.

One more. And- ahhhhhhhhhh.

You can do it the same way you've done other things: one step at a time. The step for tonight is to be done eating for the day. That's all. Just be done eating for today. Tomorrow you can have yogurt, fruit and oatmeal for breakfast, salad with cheese and nuts for lunch, and hmmm, maybe antelope stew for dinner with a couple of crackers and more fruit for a snack if you need it.

Okay. Today is taken care of, tomorrow is planned. Take another deep breath, let it out, and go on with your evening entertainment. You don't even need to think of food or weight until tomorrow morning.

More importantly, you don't need to think about what you weighed this morning again. The scale is closed until next Monday morning. The numbers will change in your favor if you follow through with good choices, just as you've been doing for several months now.

You can do it- you have done it. This is just a small blip on the radar of your life that will soon be forgotten. It is not a blot on your soul.