Hey good luck, and well done for just going through with it your right why wait for his approval if he thinks its for lazy people i woodnt even tell him after haha but thats just me let him think you done it with out the band thats what im gonna do with my friends as only my partner n close family know. You have your mums support to help you with the nerves so you go girl am sure he wont be complain as your body starts to change lol. All the best hope to here how you get on Rachel x

Good for you....Take care of yourself, you will be just fine.

This is just my opinion........I am a firm believer that marriage is a partnership, regardless of how clueless either partner can be at times. Leaving your husband out of an important health decision like this just because he doesn't understand the reason behind it may damage your relationship in a way that can't be fixed. If I were in your shoes (which I am not, again, this is just an opinion)I would sit him down some time soon and let him know what's going on, let him know that this is a decision you have made to better yourself and that you truly need his support and love. Hopefully, through standing by you, he will grow to understand and be compassionate of your struggle. If he doesn't, at least you have been honest and forthright with him. Good luck to you! This truly is a life changing event!

I think you should tell him, and share this with him, letting him know this is your FIRM decision! My husband was about the same way, except he was always there for me but thought I could still "do it" without WLS Yes, just take off 100 lbs, that should be easy~right? Right! If it were that easy I could have done it ten years ago. He was right there with me! He did not encourage or discourage, in fact he was fairly quiet about it, I wrote him a letter and gave it to him as I was being wheeled into surgery! He read it, never mentioned it, nor did I. I told him how much I loved him, admired him, appreciated him. And if anything happened to me adversely in surgery, I had to make this choice for ME so that I could be around for HIM and our children and grandchildren a LOT longer. SINCE the surgery he has seen me drop the weight and is so PROUD of me! He cooks and always cooks what I can have, reminds me to drink my protein shakes etc. He has always been a good husband, just not always supportive in every one of my endeavors. He was a LITTLE afraid I might die in surgery and he would lose me. I think he'd rather have me FAT than not at all. Could be a hidden fear of your DH(Darling Husband) LOL Good Luck and God Bless You as you go forward.

Our insurance approved my surgery & i am so excited about getting started on my new journey! My surgery is scheduled for August 27, 2010. My entire family has been extremely supportive of this decision i've made from the start. My husband has been there for me with everything i have gone through with my weight. He is truly the best man in the world! I dont think im gonna tell friends & even some family members about my surgery. Im just gonna keep them guessing how i did it. Im nervous about the weight loss as to how much i will lose & how fast i will lose it. I am so excited to begin my journey!

Your post was sad to me. Your husband should be your best friend and best support. Are you going to grow old with him? Ask him that. Good luck to you. I am happy that you are starting your jouney and jealous that you are starting before me.

You are going to need help and support along the way from him, you might want to consider telling him the day before. This is hard. Whatever you decide, whenever you tell whoever you tell, we will be there for you.

It's true that you don't need his permission to take care of your own health. Not sure this operation is something you can just tell him about later. Gonna be tough explaining those 4-5 scars that will be healing on your stomach! And why you can't lift heavy things for a few months. It is troubling that he hasn't shown compassion for others in our situation. If your partner is going to be the last person to know, it's troublesome to me. Are you shielding yourself from his reaction or shielding him from the real you and your need for some support? I'm no expert, but I have been with my partner for 21 years and keeping a secret has never been a good thing. If someone doesn't support you unconditionally, then they/you need to really figure out why. Not trying to bum you out! Good luck with the surgery and keep posting here for support!

i feel for you right now. Although I have my husbands support, I do not have my mothers or my friends support. It is very difficult to go through this journey without support. Letting him know that YOU are DOING this for YOU is an important step. It's very hard for skinny people to understand. We are all here for you!

Well I understand everyone ones concerns. Maybe it would help if I explained more. The husband and I struggled through a tough year last year. I am not totally comfortable talking to him about this subject, and I have the feeling he isn't comfortable talking to me about these types of things either. Its hard when both people are working through their issues and trying to find the new path of their marriage. Anyhow don't worry too much I am sure he will enjoy the results and if not that is ok with me to.