It's the strangest thing.... *Overshare warning*
It's the strangest thing to watch and feel my body lose weight and change. I mean just the weirdest sensation. I have to wonder why I didn't feel this when I was gaining weight. As uncomfortable and as many weird sensations as I've felt losing it, you would think there would have been some tell-tale signs when I was gaining; but no. Or maybe I just chose to ignore them.
So the strangest sensation to me is feeling my ummm private areas shrink. I know most overweight people have what they call a "fat pad" covering their pubic bone area.. but as my stomach shrinks and that area shrinks it's just the strangest feeling. I woke up this morning like something was "off" so I go and look in the mirror and I was right something was indeed off.. FAT and unwanted pounds. But now.. now one side of my stomach is an inch tighter than the other side.
Ok so maybe all of this is an overshare but I KNOW I cannot be the only one experiencing this. Like I look in the mirror and while I never had a HUGE belly it did hang more than I would of liked stopping just before my pubic area..but now the right side is up and so is the left, just not as much as the right.. a whole inch difference to be exact.
Thank the Lord for being celibate right now because ummmmmm my naked body changes on a daily basis! There's no hanging/sagging skin - THANK YOU JESUS! but the fat I do have is shifting/changing where it's deposited at as I lose it. For instance.. my bra-line incision is now in the middle of my stomach and to the left, not under my bra and centered like it was.
I'm at a point where I'm SO anxious to see what's underneath all of this, I now understand why people get surgeries like liposuctions and tummy tucks... Watching my stomach shrink and get definition is AMAZING to me... especially when I really haven't been working out. I know I know.. I could be alot further on in my process but I was so consumed with other things I wasn't making time to workout like I should...and the muscle weight gain I experienced was a turn off but now I'm back at it. Doing what's necessary to burn the rest of this weight off and sculpt the beautiful body I know is underneath. I've always had a nice shape, just a big shape..an hourglass but the big ben of hourglasses....if that makes sense lol.
So I'm SUPER anxious and motivated to get to the final result. In the meantime these sensations are just SO weird to me.. and when you think about it, it shows you just how amazing the human body really is.
The sensation I'm experience is my skin being able to breathe, being exposed to air after being covered by layers of fat or rolls previously. First it itches and can be painful as the skin is healing but then it just heals up into smooth, soft, supple skin. It's the most amazing thing.
The down side is seeing stretchmarks where I didn't know I had them.. like the backs of calves. I've always had nice legs, big, powerful, muscular, as the little bit of fat that was on them goes, I can see the traces of stretchmarks, everyone says I'm crazy and they don't see anything, but I see it, has to be in the right light but it's there.. I see it! Then again I've had stretchmarks since I was 8 yrs old... They're all old and faded and blended in with my skin. Only if I tan too much do they really show or turn red.
Ok I'm rambling but seriously this journey is just AMAZING to me... absolutely, positively AMAZING.
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