I'm so sick of myself
Nighttime is the worst time for me and last night was no surprise. I just couldn't stop eating, it's like no matter what I ate it wouldn't fill me up. I was still hungry. It felt physically that I just couldn't get full. I just kept eating stuff and nothing would do it. Then finally I hit my breaking point and was so stuffed I could hardly stand it. I say I will never do that again but usually that thinking lasts until the next time. I wish I would never do it again. I have been fighting for a month to get under 225 and haven't done it yet. Now I get on the scale and it says 229.5. I can't believe how fast I gain weight. I did 5 min on the elliptical and took the dogs for 2 walks but I guess that wasn't enough. Maybe just enough to keep me from gaining another pound. I'm so sick of myself for doing this. It is like a continuous fight inside of my head that won't stop. A battle of wills. I say stop eating but my mouth won't stop, it just is on a path of destruction. I need some advice or tips on how to stop this. I am reading about emotional eating and that isn't helping yet because I just started the book. I get very bored at night and I know that is what is causing this but I don't know how to stop it. I keep telling myself I will go to the gym but by the time I get home from work I am pooped from the day and don't want to leave the house again. I feel bad when I don't come straight home and see the dogs and take them for their walk. Maybe I just need to take them for their walk and then go to the gym. I have to push myself to go or I'm not going to lose any weight. I have to get back on track. I'm so happy for the people on here that are losing at a good pace, I wish I was one of them. So tonight I vow to hit the gym before going to bed. I'll write tomorrow and let you know how this works but if anyone has any suggestions on how to stop the night binges I would love to hear them.
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