My senior year in college I dated a graduate student. It was my first head-over-heels love affair. I was 21; he was 26. Never was the line, "Hindsight is always 20/20!" more true and now more than two decades later I Thank God for the un-answered prayer titled, "Oh please let us get back together...".

Right from the start, my friends could not stand Alex. As one pal put it, "His arrogance is only exceeded by his condescension"...or was it the other way around!?!

His "friends" had a similar vibe and would ask me what I saw in him. Several weeks into dating me he was let go from his internship at due to a "personality conflict" - of course according to Alex it wasn't his fault; they were against him. I had an uncomfortable feeling then as I would several weeks later when he roughed up a fellow lacrosse player who ribbed him for a missed goal.

Alex played into my insecurities with ruthless skill. Based on my old photos, I would've been considered "cute" maybe even "pretty" and I weighed about 125-130. At that time though, I didn't think I was any of those things and agonized over my weight.

We'd probably been going out less than a month when Alex dropped me off at my dorm after a date. I still remember stepping out of his car as he made a comment along the lines of,"...if you think you're the most beautiful girl in the world, you're sadly mistaken...!". Of course he'd already informed me that he hadn't found me that attractive when he first met me, so this comment while a real kick in the gut wasn't that surprising.

My nieces can't believe I didn't "kick'em to the curb" then and there. Goes to my lack of self-esteem at the time.

As it was, we dated for about six months. I put graduate school on hold because he didn't know where he'd(we - as he implied)get a job. I starved myself because he had no problems advising me at intimate moments that he'd seen me, "looking slimmer in that teddie". I cooked and baked for him only to have him complain that boxed brownie mix was so much better and on one memorable occasion, throw a fit because there were bones in a piece of fish I'd broiled.

Stir into this pot my meddling mother who between trying to live my life for me and engineer our break up was telling me she'd never forgive me I "screwed up" this relationship(she thought Alex was a "catch") and telling him he wasn't good enough for me(well - that was true:w00t:).

Right around graduation time, I found a faux-diamond ring in a Tiffany box on his desk. Since he only bought the best for himself I don't know whether he was going to try to pass it off as the real deal or if it was left there for me to find and either get upset about or give me a clue. I never acknowledged finding it. This was a guy who told me he'd never send me flowers, because then I'd "expect it all the time".

He broke up with me three weeks before graduation. Looking back, I can see how he'd planned the whole thing. There was no concrete "reason" ... he "didn't know what he was going to do with his life", and he "couldn't stand my family"...

Oh he wanted us to stay "friends", but he "too busy" attend my graduation ceremony. Me being the doormat I was back then - went to his. His parents didn't even know he'd dumped me! One of his classmates made the comment to me that "...you don't realize it now, but you dodged a bullet..."

I moved home to Virginia and from the day after I got home he was calling me and sending me job notices from the city he landed in - but never came out and said he wanted us to be together again. Like an idiot, I got a job and moved in with one of my sorority sisters who lived in the area. Quasi-dating lasted three months and we split up again. A month or so later I'd realized I was better off without him and had been accepted to grad school at UVA for the fall term, so I was packing to move back home when he called and wanted me to pick up some things I'd left at his apartment. I should've never gone over.

He'd been drinking and wanted to know why I hadn't called in over a month? Who had I been seeing? You can guess where it went from there - I got to see the same side of Alex that his former lacrosse teammate saw - and a trip to the ER from my roomie-sister - though I had only minor physical injuries.

So jump ahead twenty some odd years. My 21-year-old niece is home from college for the summer and I'm telling her this tale. She wonders if Alex is on FaceBook. I'd prefer not to think of Alex so I never looked - but to amuse her we did. Oh - he's on there and guess who one of his Facebook buddies is - my old roomie-sister..who only knew him because she knew me...and knew what he did and said to me...Two Weasels from the Past!