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This was a crappy day!

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anglov

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ok well not totally crappy. I suppose it could be worse. I felt clogged today. I felt like something was trapped in the back of my throat. Like it was sitting there like nothing was going to pass by it. I didn't feel nauseated or anything but suddenly I just knew I needed ot get to the bathroom. I got in there and gagged. Again not nauseated it was just a feeling. I gagged three times and only spit but it dislodged whatever it was because I felt "free". Very weird. I sipped water for the next couple of hours. I am having a lot of sinus drainage that makes me cough day and night. I hope this doesn't cause any problems.

All day long I was STARVING, okay not actually starving but you know what I mean. The hunger pains were there all day. I limited myself to 2 oz per meal like yesterday and felt I could have eaten 4 more.

The pain was mostly gone today. I actually wore pants that button and I buttoned them so I would say the swelling once again is down. Maybe that is why I am so hungry? Dang if that is the case then I am a fast healer which could be problematic since I don't have the opportunity for a fill until June.

I have realized today that even though I had surgery I have a habit of grazing. And if you think about it, if we are to eat every 3-4 hours anyway then that is essentially the same as grazing. I cooked again tonight and while I kept from scarffing the mac n cheese(by the way I AM ADDICTED TO) I was sooo hungry while cooking and it wasn't time for me to eat again.

I prepared myself for how hard this would be but I guess I never thought that it would be like this. That's not true. I did I guess I just hoped it would cure some of my habits. Again a reminder this was surgery on my stomach not my brain. I have to be determined to make this my new life. I am really thankful my doctor does not require an extended liquid diet after surgery.

Tomorrow I am going back to the foods I ate yesterday since that day was optimal for me.

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Things will get better!! :-) This what I did. I knew that this was not a diet this was a change in life. I was only going to cook one meal for everyone to eat. There would be things that I would only be able to have one or two bites of (like mac n cheese) but my family would eat the rest of. I started cooking more healthy meals (unbelievable everyone loved-even the two year old). Your tastes buds will start to change especially after you have your first fill. Also, I have used pinapple juice when I have felt stuck. I buy the small cans of it just in case. I wish you the best. Keep your chin up, it will get better!! Some days are not the best but then there are fantastic ones that make you forget all about them!!

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I know how you feel. I too wish the surgery had an affect on my brain! I would automatically have motivation and discipline after the surgery! lol. But I'm with you, just keep plugging along day by day knowing the battle is worth it! Keep up the good work!

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