Sometimes I wonder what miscellaneous people see when they look at me. Are they disgusted by my appearence as much as I am lately?

Like, admittedly, when I see someone fat (my size on upwards of 4 or 500lbs): I wonder if there sturggles w/food have been like mine, I wonder how they feel about themselves, and wonder if they are as uncomfortable as I have been (physically, in terms of knee/hip/foot pain, exhaustion, etc) But most of all, I wonder if they have ever reached the end of their rope w/their weight/health or if they are content with being that way. I ask, b/c I know that some folks enjoy being overweight (ie: the lady recenty who aiming at trying to be 1200 lbs or something so assinine)

I’m not judging. And this is not intended to sound/read as such – I’m just curious about peoples lives…and if, like me, they too are just as fed up with being (so) fat & out of shape…but don’t know what to do about it. I know people probably look at me on the Metro when I’m about to take a seat next to them thinking “noooooooo, I don’t want that fat broad squeezing me into the seat!!”. I’m very aware of peoples reactions…and it hurts. I just wonder if it affects anyone like it has affected me. And further – at what point do you decide to do something about your health??

Being fat I could care lass about. IF I could be fat (morbidly obese is a less pretty term for the truth) AND healthy at this size…ok. But I think it’s physically impossible to be over a certain weight and not have any health issues (present & future) associated with it. Some folks are just riding down the river called denial. I know for me I wasn’t particularly in denial – its just that everything I tried never lasted long term, and I grew sick of feeling like crap about myself – especially over the past year. I don’t want to become one of those folks that acts (seems to act) like I’m so much more enlightened because I’ve decided to do something about my health – because that’s ALL this is about for me. But I wonder if people really know where they stand in terms of mortality.

I’ll put it this way – there is NO food good enough, no alcoholic beverage tasty enough…for me to remain in my current state. I need help trying to shave some years off the death sentance I’ve given myself over the past 2 decades, and pray that the Insurance “Mayor” makes the LAP-BAND® surgery an easy pardon. I’m at my wits end. Add to it married life, motherhood, 9-5 job, jewelry biz…I’m damn near ready to throw myself (and a few other select ppl) off the Woodrow Wilson bridge. But its only a matter of time. Change come soon – I bring it!

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I had the same feelings...I had to do something..tired of the failed diets (or the diets that didn't last). When I had my son I realized that if I didn't make permanent changes then he wouldn't have a mommie later in his life..let alone someone to play with now since I couldn't barely get up off the floor to keep up with him. He is 2 1/2 now!

i just got banded...i and before i did...i was always admired for the way I put myself together...i always looked smaller than i really was...i was admired by the fellas, and have lots of friends..and i let my exterior make me feel like i had nothing to change....but when you get on a plane and dont

fit in a seat...or when you sweat so much that people are looking at you crazy...or when you feel like you are about to break your heels for standing on them too long...or you cant fit into those bbq party backyard plastic chairs...all do to your weight...you start to come to the harsh reality that you need to lose weight...i cant wait to feel good in all facets of my life... physically, emotionally, and health wise...good luck on your journey!

Vixen,

You got this girl. What you desire will be yours. Bowchicawowow. I can feel it. Stars are aligning up for you to have this chance at life full of health, self love and a baller wardrobe.. holla. Go GGX Jewels!!