(March 13, 2010) It's been a couple of weeks since my last post but I have been one very busy woman!

Since my last post I turned 40 on Feb. 23rd! I danced the night away with about 10 of my good girlfriends. We took a free Salsa class and then danced, danced, danced. It felt so good. I wore a gold, mini-dress and some high heels and carried a wand! Oh yes....I acted like the Goddess that I am and I was very proud of myself. I felt it was like my first birthday all over again. There was no shame in the way I felt. I looked good and I knew it. Vain....yes but hey, you only turn 40 once. I celebrated the whole week and enjoyed life to the fullest.:glare:

I have also has some difficult experiences with Lilith (my band) in the last few weeks. I experienced first-hand how anger and stress can make your band tighen with a vengence. I don't get angry much but I was upset with a lender who was not giving my client the attention she needed. This lender started to yell at me and I was NOT going to take that so I made sure I put them back in their place. Well, by the end of that episode, I was shaking, my head was pounding and Lilith (my band) was in an uproar! For the next few days I tried to stay calm but I could not get water down and I had acid reflux to levels I have never EVER had before! So off to the doctor I went. I had a full 1cc taken out. That took me to 4.0cc's. Well, I still was throwing up and experiencing bad reflux so just a few days ago I went back in and let them take out another .5cc's. SO that put me at 3.5cc's right now. I can't say it was bad either. Finally that fire in my belly calmed down and Lilith loosened her grip. But during that time I lost an additional 10lbs. I was already at goal but now I am in the 155 weight range. I don't think it looks bad on me, hubby says I still look great so maybe I will stay between 155-165 and feel ok. I am not really going for the emaciated look so I am trying to be careful! I don't know.....but I do know I don't really want to lose it like that again! Can you say.....ANGER MANAGEMENT???

My size 12 jeans are too loose now, I was getting away with wearing them without looking too baggy but not now. Hi-Ho Hi-Ho it's off to shop I go.....(giggle)

Since I have reached goal, I have been trying to focus on the positive changes in my life. Things you take for granted but notice when you now blend into the "normal" world.

Things like....

• Using a regular sized towel to wrap around you while you are getting ready in the morning.
  
• People looking you in the eye when they talk to you.
  
• Men whistling at you.
  
• The way you feel in your clothes.
  
• Getting a good nights rest because your body does not always have body parts falling asleep to deadness.
  
• Liking the image that looks back at you in the mirror.
  
• Shopping in the regular sized stores.
  
• Feeling sexy for no reason
  
• Knowing you can fit into a airplane seat (I have a trip coming up, more later)
  
• Accepting compliments without shame.
  
• Feeling good in room full of women! Women can be so catty sometimes, but I can hold my own now! I no longer hide in the shadows!
  

I could go on and on. This life of mine....of yes....this life of mine if finally happy and content.

There are a few other things I am watching close. My periods are all out of whack. I had two, just two weeks apart! Gotta see if I can get more vitamins in.

I am also just no longer intrested in food. Yes, I know that's weird. Sometimes I think I have cravings but when I get a bite it just does not taste the same or feel the same. Do you know what I am talking about? Sometimes eating was just totally emotional, it tasted good because it was a release. At this point of my progress I can really and truly say....I can take food or leave it.

Well friends.....I am off to Italy! I will be gone until April 1st. A full 17 days to relax, unwind, enjoy my husband and see the world. It's my first time overseas! And....I will fit into the airplane seats! (HA):wink2:

Thanks for all the wonderful comments on my photos! I truly felt beautiful for the first time in my life and now I have those photos to help me remember that feeling!

I will tell you all about my wonderful adventures when I return! Love you all BUNCHES!

And as always.....I AM BLESSED!

Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?:smile2:

Surgery Date: May 21, 2009

Starting Weight: 280lbs

Dr. Michael Metz - St. Luke's Hospital Denver, CO:thumbup:

Follow my progress thru photos:

http://www.lapbandtalk.com/members/5...lbums3475

Wow...I really enjoyed reading your post, Congratulations on your progress. I will be banded on march 19th 2010 and I will be so excited to be in the land of the banded..lol have fun in Italy My husband and I went there in 2008 for a 12 night mediterranean cruise oh what fun.

So proud of you and happy that your band is feeling better. I also had to have an unfill this past wednesday. I still feel tight though...... Not sure if I want another un fill???? Best wishes and Happy Belated Birthday GF. imaluckydog

So happy for you! I too have noticed that when I stress, my band tightens! I did not have an unfill. Also if I eat while riding, it always wants to come back up, just can't relax! I try to mentally relax myself and sit so I am comfortable for the food to go down easy. You look awesome! I weighed about what you did, and I have lost 77 lbs. I too don't want the emanciated look, or the wrinkles! I want to be in a size 12 or maybe a 10 and then maintain the weight! Have a great time on your cruise! Never been to Italy (yet!) Great place for romance with your hubby! Have fun!