Waiting..Just waiting...
It seems like everything has simply stalled for me and as a result I have lost focus..lost my mind..lost my excitement. I have been eating like I have a bottomless pit for a stomach. I do have see the bariatric surgeon again until the middle of next month and the sleep study the week after. I keep telling myself that I will get back on track tomorrow and find myself sidetracked. Work has been very stressful and co-workers and I have been going out for drinks and as a result have found myself the next morning trying to eat down hangovers the next morning or working through breakfast or lunch because it is so busy then going overboard at the next meal. Just picking up alot of the bad habits that got me to where I am today. The little bit of wieght I lost I am sure I have gained back and I feel my distractions have come easier because I am not moving along in the process to getting the surgery at the initial pace which seemed to have me doing something once a week when I first started my journey.
One of the other concerns I have is making sure I have the money I will need for the psych and nutritionist appts that will cost me close to $500. With my oldest daughter in college and my youngest starting high school in a couple of weeks, my husband wanting to complete home improvement projects and no overtime at work my money is very "funny". So in a sense, the delay is somewhat of a blessing since it gives me some time to save but at this point and pace, I don't see myself getting a date until the end of the year or beginning of next year.
From the beginning I have told myself if it is meant to be, everything that I need will be available when I need it and I will be just fine. My faith is all I have.
So its another Sunday, and again I promise myself to get back on the horse of developing more positive habits, that will simply get me prepared for what I will eventually have to make a permanent part of my life.
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