I've been coming to the realization that every mealtime is battletime for me. I often go into a meal thinking it's just time to eat, but I really need more awareness than that. It's time to make good food choices, chew very well, take tiny bites, and ask myself all the right questions. It's not as enjoyable as it used to be, but I don't mind giving up the enjoyment of 3 thirty minute meals each day if it means being happier the other 22.5 hours of the day.

And as with all of life's battles as the old saying goes... You win some. You lose some.

This morning, I won one. I started eating a breakfast burrito. I was just mindlessly eating. For the first time in a very long time, I realized I had absolutely no reason to be eating. I wasn't hungry n it wasn't even very good. So I asked myself, "what the heck are u doing?" and I threw that darn thing away. I felt accomplished.

This evening, however, I lost one. The addict in me was strong. See, I was watching Chopped. I'm usually ok with watching Chopped because they make the kinds of things that are very gourmet and I would never ever cook, or have a strong desire to try. But shorty after chopped came Alton Brown's show and he was talking about popcorn on the stovetop. My mind took me back to my mom's kitchen where the smell of popcorn filled the house from the iron skillet it had popped in. So I used Alton's method so I could afford my five-year-old that same joy and fascinate him with my culinary skills (ha). It was fun hearing the sizzles and pops. And that popcorn was soooo goooood with all that salt and homemade goodness. TOO good because I couldn't stop eating it. Fortunately for my comfort level, it went down surprisingly well. Unfortunately for my waistline (loosely assuming that I have one), it went down surprisingly well.

So today, June 2, I vow to only watch Food Network when a show is preparing food well beyond the capability of my (very) limited skills. Should a show being making a dish I can seemingly pull off, I will temporarily boycott it for HGTV.

My daddy used to make popcorn in an iron skillet every Sunday night after church. You'd better believe I'm glad I can't make it myself. As a matter of fact, anything on Food Network is beyond my capabilities. The fast food commercials are what kill me. I always get tempted to call the hubbs to bring some home. (And unfortunately, I usually do make the call.)

I love what you say about being an addict. That's me! Now, I just have to learn to deal with it, and I am confident the band will help!