Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!
$99 Yearly Supply Alert! 🌈 "1 per Day!" Bariatric Multivitamins
  • entries
    99
  • comments
    407
  • views
    105,945

About this blog

The things I learned pre and post surgery

Entries in this blog

 

Quick FAQs (VSG) How Often Do You Weigh Post Weight Loss Surgery

Weight loss surgery Frequently Asked Questions - How often do you weight yourself after weight loss surgery? It really depends on the person and how well they can handle seeing the scale going up and down. I am more *cough cough* obsessive about it than most people. I tend to weight myself when I first get up, then again after a poop, then after I pee, and then again after work or exercising.   If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve  
joatsaint

joatsaint

2
 

Quick FAQs - Why Choose VSG Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy?

Frequently Asked Questions - Why did you choose vertical sleeve gastrectomy over the Lap Band or Gastric Bypass (RNY or Duodenal Switch)? I looked at three weight loss surgery options before choosing the sleeve. I chose the gastric sleeve because it seemed to be the one with the fewest complications.   I wasn't thrilled with the gastric lapband because I have a friend who had the lapband, but had complications including scarring on the outside of the stomach where the band rubbed. And he learned how to eat around his band. After losing over 150lbs, he resumed his old eating habits and gained it all back, plus some.   I was creeped out with RNY. I couldn't handle the thought of being required to take supplements for the rest of my life, plus the whole rerouting of my intestines didn't sound good.     If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve
joatsaint

joatsaint

0
 

Quick FAQs - What Was The Last Straw?

Frequently Asked Questions - What was the last straw the made you choose weight loss surgery?   I was at my lowest point physically and mentally in July 2012. I knew that my health would continue to deteriorate and I'd only become more and more depressed if I didn't make a change. Some people claim that weight loss surgery is the easy way out, but I needed the extra help from WLS to dig myself out of the hole I was in.   It's kinda funny that society ridicules you for being overweight and then ridicules you again if you don't lose the weight "the right way."   If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve
joatsaint

joatsaint

0
 

Quick FAQs - What Is The Honeymoon Period

Frequently Asked Questions - Weight Loss Surgery - What is the honeymoon period?   For about 6 to 10 months post-weight loss surgery is the time when it is the easiest to lose weight. Outside of the dreaded stalls, weight generally tends to fall off magically. But eventually the body becomes adjusted to the lower caloric intake and adjusts it's metabolism down. So it's vitally important to take advantage of this "honeymoon period" to stick to your doctor's dietary guidelines and lose as much weight as possible.   After the "honeymoon period" it is still possible to lose weight, but it will require more vigilance on caloric intake and diet, being careful not to fall into old habits, and increasing exercise levels to maintain your metabolism.   If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve
joatsaint

joatsaint

3
 

Quick FAQs - What Is A Slider Food

Weight Loss Surgery Frequently Asked Questions "What is a slider food?" For everyone that has had weight loss surgery, there is a slider food. Basically a slider food is anything that you can eat a lot of without feeling full and the feeling of fullness does not last.   For me, my slider foods include; nuts of any kind, popcorn, peanut butter and fruit. I have to keep careful watch over how much I'm eating of a slider food, I can easily blow the calorie count limit I've set for the day.   If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve
joatsaint

joatsaint

0
 

Quick FAQs - What Can I Eat After (VSG) Weight Loss Surgery

Frequently Asked Question: How do I transition to full foods from the puree diet? As I healed from (VSG) weight loss surgery. I came up with a simple test that let me know almost immediately if my stomach was going to tolerate a new food.   If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve
joatsaint

joatsaint

0
 

Quick FAQs - Weight Loss Surgery - How Long Before Returning to Work?

Frequently Asked Questions - How long were you off work after weight loss surgery? The length of time off work post-surgery is going to vary on your ability to recover and any effects of medications you are taking.   When I began researching weight loss surgery types, I read many accounts and watched lots of videos over how quickly people recovered from weight loss surgery. Some had extraordinary recoveries and were back at work within 3 or 4 days, others were not able to return to work for 4 weeks.   I was back at work on day 10 post-op. I have a desk job that does not require heavy lifting, squatting or bending.   I would recommend wearing the abdominal binder if the hospital gives you one. I wore mine everyday for 4 weeks post op.   If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve
joatsaint

joatsaint

0
 

Quick FAQs - Shaving After (VSG) Weight Loss Surgery

Weight Loss Surgery Frequently Asked Questions: How has shaving changed after (VSG) weight loss surgery? Plus, how to make your razor blades last longer.   A few years ago I was researching how to make razor blades last longer, after all, disposable razor blades are becoming really expensive - especially the 4 and 5 blade ones. I read an article that said most razor blades cause irritation not because they lose their edge, but because of dead skin cells and salts that dry on the blades between shaves. I make my blades last much longer by keeping them submerged in plain old tap water between shaves.   If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve
joatsaint

joatsaint

0
 

Quick FAQs - How Soon Can I Have Sex After Surgery?

I gotta tell ya that post-op, I didn't even think about having sex for at least the 1st hour! :-P But seriously, I was in so much pain for the 1st 8 or 9 days that all I ever thought about was, "When will this stop hurting?!!!!!!!"

But others had a much easier post-op recovery than I did, but it still surprised me how often this question is asked in both the men's and women's private forums. And as always, go with your doctor's instructions 1st - if he told you. If he didn't or you can't wait, just be careful and don't doing anything too acrobatic that might stretch your staples or stitches.

Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!
joatsaint

joatsaint

0
 

Quick FAQs - How Much Can You Eat After (VSG) Weight Loss Surgery

Here's joatsaint and Frankensleeve coming at you with another (VSG) weight loss surgery Frequently Asked Question. How much can you eat after weight loss surgery?   If you like/dislike my videos, please thumb up or down, and leave a comment about how I could improve the content. Your input helps me become a better Youtuber. :-)   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!   Google Plus https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/102076899634252886094/102076899634252886094/posts/p/pub   Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frankensleeve-Vertical-Sleeve-Gastrectomy-VSG-Community/289332951205311   Twitter https://twitter.com/frankensleeve
joatsaint

joatsaint

0
 

Quick FAQs - Frequently Asked Questions

Okay, this post is not to bash the newbies or newts (not a newbie/not a veteran), although I can see how it could look that way. My sense of humor is dry/sarcastic and it's hard to convey that in print.   I thought I'd start compiling some of the most commonly asked questions I see posted on weekly basis, just to show that you are not alone with your thoughts and concerns.                          Will all my hair fall out after VSG?      "Individuals don't begin to notice the increase in hair loss when showering or brushing the hair until about three months post-surgery. Although the resting hair is being pushed out of the scalp by new hair that is already growing, it can take anywhere from about six months to a year for the hair to return to its normal fullness.       Individuals who have undergone gastric bypass or other operations of the digestive tract designed to reduce obesity are more prone to hair loss post-surgery. This is due to the reduced intake of food in the weeks and months immediately following these procedures. The body needs an adequate amount of proteins and vitamins to maintain hair production. Protein-enhanced shakes are often recommended for these patients as a substitute until solid food can be better tolerated.     Hair loss related to surgery typically reverses itself without any medicinal intervention or the need for over-the-counter hair loss tonics or treatments. However, maintaining a diet rich in protein and iron is believed to help promote and speed up healthy hair growth. Suggested foods include salmon, beans, eggs, spinach, broccoli, nuts and whole-grain cereals. Avoid foods that can inhibit hair growth, such as those that contain high levels of caffeine and fat." Losing Hair After Surgery | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/...l#ixzz2Maz1GjQH   Can I take my leftover stomach home in a jar?        Man, what kind of sickie... um I mean, that's a very astute question. I didn't ask my doctor about it, but from what I've read, it's considered medical waste and a biohazard in the U.S. So you can't have it as a trophy or to tan and make a beanie out of it.      If you're having surgery out of the country, then they may let you take it home, just be careful going through customs. If they ask about it, just tell them you found proof that the Chupacabra exists in Mexico.   Can't I do this with out the surgery? You know, eat the crazy small amounts and still lose weight? Why isn't that ok?        You can eat the small meals to lose weight, and it is okay. I just couldn't live that lifestyle for very long. It was a non-stop battle to keep myself from eating more.   How did you choose your doctor, how much did it cost, and how did you pay for it?         I don't want to recommend my doctor, since I wasn't happy with the aftercare, but I paid about $5k between the doctor and hospital. I put it on a credit card and will have it paid off before the end of the year. I found my doctor by calling my insurance company and getting a list of approved WLS doctors. I did a Google search for each doctor and read the reviews before choosing my surgeon.   Do you regret having WLS surgery?      I do not regret it for a minute. Even with all the discomfort of the 1st 10 days, I am very happy with the result. Food is no longer the focus of my life and I love sitting at a buffet restaurant knowing that I will only eat about 1/4 plate of food.   What do I need to pack for the hospital? Here is a long list of suggestions on things you might want to consider taking with you. http://www.verticals...surgery-thread/   How soon after surgery can I start drinking alcohol? I'm sure every doctor has their own recommendations, but my doctor said wait 6 months post-surgery before drinking alcohol again. I'm not a big drinker to begin with, so I didn't miss alcohol. But I did drink about 2 oz. of Tequila at month 6 or 7 and was buzzing immediately, more so than I would have been pre-surgery. So, if you're going to start drinking again, just be aware that it may take less alcohol to impair your system. :-)
joatsaint

joatsaint

14
 

Quick FAQs - Can I eat ____ After (VSG) Weight Loss Surgery

Can I eat (insert food here) after Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy WLS surgery? The answer is... most likely. It's really going to depend on the person and how you have healed. I have not found any food that I could not eat, once I was back on full foods post-op. Surprisingly, the processed foods/snack foods/fast food was the easiest to digest. It was the healthy foods - boneless skinless chicken breasts, broccoli, cauliflower, lettuce, pineapple, apples and grapes that gave me trouble up until about the 6 month mark. At 9 months post-op, I can eat anything I want with only the occasional stomach growl.

The best NSV post-op is that I have not wanted all those processed/fast foods that I craved pre-surgery. I can honestly say that I don't even think about going out for pizza or hamburgers any more. So if you're worried about not being able to eat your favorite foods post-op, you may come to realize that post-op you don't WANT to eat them ever again. :-)
joatsaint

joatsaint

2
 

Punk'd by Mothra or How a Butterfly Made Me His Bhatch

Ok, the good news. I graduated from walking indoors to walking outdoors. Now the bad news. Monarch butterflies are bullies!   I've finally gotten enough endurance and stamina to start walking outdoors. I still don't like exercising, but I do like the effects. And I just can't make myself use either my recumbent bike or treadmill - they're just too boring. And besides, the computer is just 10 feet away the whole time, pouting from lack of attention. Did I mention that my Dell is an attention wh*re?   So I have to get outside to walk. I have a state park just a few miles away and there are some nice nature trails that are about 1 mile in length.   I've only been out there with my best friend. That way, if we run into a bear or wolf, I don't have to outrun the critter, I only have to outrun my friend!   But this week, my friend is out of state, visiting his sister in Ohio. So it was questionable if I was going to motivate myself to get out and walk today at the park. But I mustered up the energy and drove out to the park.   So here we go. I got my bright yellow shirt, the $5 forest green cap that I picked up in Alaska (is says, "If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes!") and shades. Oh goodie, I look like a guy cruising the park looking for other guys - that has been known to happen at this park.   Luckily for me the park was almost deserted and even better, no one was on the trails. So I started my normal route. Around the lake, skirt the canal and head back to the car through the flat areas.   There are some ups and down areas that I think help strengthen my legs and ankles, but not so steep as to cause me pain, or worse, hurtle down hill out of control! Going uphill is no problem. I just don't do down's very well. I'm not good at getting down, boogieing down or going down hill.   Anyway, back to my story. I was minding my own business, walking the trail, hugging the shade, and lost in my own thoughts when suddenly a black shape swoops out of the woods. Mere inches from my left arm.   And I did what any manly man would do. I flinched and started windmilling my arms (oops, I meant to say, "used my master karate skills"), to swat away whatever that deadly critter was - to keep it's venomous fangs away from my throat!   A lifetime later (or about 3 seconds in real time), I realized it was just a huge Monarch butterfly fluttering by. He casually fluttered across the trail and back into the woods. But I swear, this was no ordinary butterfly. I think it was a Pimp butterfly, cause he fluttered with a limp and was very colorful, like a pimp, and had an attitude. I swear I heard him say, "Punk ass bit*h!" as he fluttered back into the woods.   I'm sure he told all his butterfly friends about how he - a 1 ounce butterfly - scared a 280 pound man and made him flinch. I guess I'm lucky he didn't give me two punches for flinching or have a smart phone to capture a video of whole thing. Otherwise, I might be on Youtube ring now, going viral.   P.S. The good news is: I managed to walk just over 2 miles AND, as a bonus, got in a killer arm workout. But I fear the psychological scars may never heal.   Keep Pimpin that Sleeve!
joatsaint

joatsaint

6
 

Premier Protein Drinks Review - Chocolate

I almost finished my first one without stopping, it was so good. The chocolate shakes deserve 2 thumbs up in a Z formation!   Very good taste, no grittiness. I like them better than the EAS chocolate carb control shakes. Although I do wish both brands were a little thicker.   I've tried Muscle Milk, EAS, Pure Soy and Premier Protein chocolate shakes and Premier Protein has been the best for flavor and smoothness. Very yummy, almost as good as chocolate milk.   Price wise, they are a little more expensive than EAS. EAS are 4 for $5 at Walmart. Premier Protien was 12 for $19 at Sam's Club (my Walmart didn't carry Premier).   But as good as Premier tastes, I will won't mind paying a little more. I only wish Sam's had the Premier Protein bars as well - but they were sold out. Maybe next trip.  
joatsaint

joatsaint

22
 

Pre-Op Diet and Worries About Being Thinner

Well, it's official. My surgery is on the 27th.   The good news is that my pre-op diet is only for 5 days and it won't be too much of an alteration of my current eating habits. From my research, I already had a good idea of what the pre-op diet was going to be like, just didn't know how long I would be expected to be on it. I had prepared myself mentally for a 2 week liquid diet. So it was really a surprise to hear that it is only 5 days and I can drink as much of the high protein/low carb shakes as I want and eat soups (like chicken noodle) as long as they don't contain high carb vegies like potatoes.   I've already figured out a combination of dutch chocolate EAS carb control shakes with 1 scoop of Total Soy (chocolate) that tastes great and has a combined 30 grams of protein and 11 grams of carbs per 20 oz shake. I highly recommend getting a shaker bottle with the little ball spring inside. It really breaks up the Total Soy powder making a smooth creamy shake. I bought a 2 pack at Sam's club for $12, and I saw them at Wal-Mart for $7 each. But with the 2 pack I can keep one at work and one at home.   I figure I'm having the same thoughts and feelings as others in the pre-op stage. So I wanted to share a moment I had last week that makes me laugh at myself now. I had a small panic attack until I realized how stupid it was. I actually got worried that post op, I wouldn't be able to eat as much I as I could in the past. Stupid, right?   But I guess it plays on my basic fear of change. How am I going to handle being thinner and how people will react and treat me at work and socially. As it is, I have 40 years of knowing how people treat the fat me. Now, I have to worry about how people will treat me as a thin person.
joatsaint

joatsaint

5
 

Post-Op 28 Days - Passin Gas or Can You Smell What the Rock is Cookin?

Gastronomically, things are crazy. I've been passing gas (and I don't mean gas as in gas station!) every night. I wake up at 1:30am or 4:30am belching and farting like crazy. I've passed so much gas I'm afraid to turn on the lights - I might set off a spark and cause an explosion.   I can lay on my left side and feel okay. If I switch to my right, I can feel and hear gurgling in my stomach. Don't understand that. But it all stops right after I wake up for work, I guess that's a small blessing for my co-workers. :-)   I'm thinking that since my bowel movements have slowed to every other day, the food sitting in my intestines has more time to ferment.     Anyone else experience this?
joatsaint

joatsaint

7
 

Post-Op 21 Days - Sick and Tired

Well, it's been 21 days since my surgery. I'm having trouble getting in enough walking. My feet and hips get seriously sore after 20 minutes of walking. I'm not sure that I've fully gotten over my cold because I feel very weak and tired every day. I've noticed that I don't sleep as much anymore. Previously, I'd sleep between 8 and 10 hours but now I sleep about 7 and wake up and can't get back to sleep.   I've been stuck at the same weight for the past 5 days. I've been watching my calorie intake pretty closely and know that I'm taking in between 700 - 1000 calories a day. I figure that plus the walking should be making an impact. It could just be a plateau, so I'll just keep on keeping on.   One bit of good news, I had to punch a new hole in my belt. So now I'm one notch smaller.   The 2nd bit of good news is that I haven't felt hungry since the surgery. Hunger has always plagued me - as far back as I can remember. It was like a little nagging kid pulling at my sleeve. And I couldn't get rid of him. I knew that 2 hours after eating a meal of almost any size, that I'd be digging in the fridge for the next thing to eat. I knew that I was not physically hungry, but the constant need to eat drove me to put something in my stomach as soon as there was room. I believe it was the over production of ghrelin (wiki link) in my stomach that caused me to be hungry all the time. I am sure that I was a food addict.   I've been testing different foods. So far I've found that my stomach can handle fat free re-fried beans with salsa and a little hamburger, peanut butter, fat free yogurt, cream of mushroom and cream of chicken soup and hard boiled eggs.   I still can't handle chicken, sugar free popsicles or sugar free jell-o. One tsp and I almost immediately feel gas bubbles rolling through my stomach.   In case you're interested in how I test new foods, I normally eat 1/2 tsp of the new food. Wait 5 minutes. If everything feels okay, I eat a full tsp. My stomach will usually let me know how it feels about a food after the 1st or 2nd bite.   I haven't tried any other drinks besides Crystal Light lemonade and water. I've been drinking Crystal Light for over 10 years and never gotten tired of it. I wish it was out there back when I was a kid. But the only diet drinks back then were horrible! Tab and Fresca - MAN, those were some awful flavors.   Anyone else remember Tab and Fresca? Anyone drink more than 1 can before throwing it away?
joatsaint

joatsaint

14
 

Post-Op 14 Days - Puree Diet

Just got back from my 2 week checkup. Down 21 lbs from my pre-surgery start weight. Doc put me on the puree diet and told me to walk at least 1 hr a day 4 - 5 times a week. That's going to be difficult because of all the rain coming up for the next week.   I'm doing pretty well with cream of chicken and cream of mushroom soup and peanut butter. But I've tested a tiny bite of chicken, hamburger and Vienna sausages, seems like anything along those lines is still too tough for my stomach. Almost immediately I can feel rolling gas bubbles in my stomach and I have to burp.   Found some great food storage containers at Wal-Mart. They seem to be the perfect size for how much I can eat at one sitting.
joatsaint

joatsaint

5
 

Post - Op - Day 8

Well, I'm a little late on the blog updates. I had planned to keep a daily update as soon as I got home from the hospital, but on top of gas pain and catching a cold, I've been pretty miserable until tonight. The gas pains are gone and I've pretty much whipped the cold.   I didn't know it at the time, but the Blue Bell sugar free popsicles I was eating were causing lots of gas, along with sugar free Jell-O. So once I realized what was happening I stopped eating them on day 4.   Since then, I've been doing very well with cream of mushroom and cream of chicken soup. Not that I"m eating that much at once, maybe a half teaspoon every 5 minutes. It takes me 3 - 4 hours to eat an entire 10oz. can.   I've tried a variety of things - creamy peanut butter, Vienna sausage, boiled eggs, and chicken breast. I was able to easily tolerate a 1/2 tsp of everything except the chicken breast. I guess it's too hard for my stomach to break down, but it doesn't hurt.   One thing I have discovered is that I tolerate things with a strong flavor better than weak flavors. I loved the sickly sweet flavor of the grape popsicles, but the cherry, orange, and lime really turned my stomach.   And I'm still loving my Crystal Light lemonade, but I'm having to mix it at almost double strength to be able to taste it.
joatsaint

joatsaint

3
 

Porn Mags for Women or How to Get Your Woman to Add to Your Porn Stash

We've all seen them, all those women's magazines clogging the checkout counters. With titles like, "How to find His Pleasure Spot," "10 New Tricks to Keep Your Man," "Good Girls Bend at the Waist, Bad Girls Bend at the Knees." Now I'm all for women boning up on how to please their man. But where is the equal treatment for men's magazines?   If those same headlines were in a man's magazine, the thing would be shamefully hidden, deep behind the counter in liquor stores, with a piece of cardboard blocking the cover, lest some young innocent soul gaze upon the image and be scarred for life.   And, GASP!, if you actually thought of buying one, you'd have to wear a disguise so your neighbors wouldn't know it was you. And you'd shamefully carry it home, wrapped in a brown paper bag or folded between the pages of a newspaper - stuffed under the car seat. So no one would know that you were about to abuse yourself in front of God and all your ancestors.   But stores proudly display women's porn right there on the end cap at the checkout counter. How did it become socially acceptable for women's porn magazines to be sold right next to the Tic Tacs and Juicy Fruit gum? Is it because because the target audience is women?   Another inequality, I saw a commercial for the micro vibrator sold by Trojan. The women in the commercial sit around in circles talking about how wonderful it is, and even grandma chimes in and happily gets in on the action.   Can you imagine the public reaction if it was 3 guys sitting in a circle (I know where you're headed - 3 guys in a circle, just don't go there!) expounding on the joys of the Fleshlight? It would be an outrage. The Christian Right would flood the airwaves with indigent protests of how shameful the commercial was and how we're all going to burn in Hell for it. But because it's women talking about masturbation, somehow it's acceptable.   And finally it hits me! The marketing! If the men's magazines just worded the headlines on the magazine covers differently, their magazines could be sitting right there next to Cosmo and the Tic Tacs! And the best part is, women would be happily buying the magazines for their boyfriends and husbands.   Just imagine if the latest edition of "Spread'em" changed the headlines from "Brandy's Naughty Adventure," to "Brandy's Illustrated Guide to Pleasing Your Woman!" or "Brandy Shows You 10 Ways to Make Your Woman Scream in Bed (No! Not by calling her by the wrong name.)" Women would rush to the stands to buy their man the latest issue. It's all in the marketing.   Keep Pimpin' that Sleeve!
joatsaint

joatsaint

5
 

Oberto Strikes Back at Vegans - Releases Bacon Jerky

Is this just evil or the ultimate "Man" food?   OMG! Just had a piece, tastes like little bites of heaven! Little bit crunchy, but still a little chewy - call it al dente. Basically tastes like bacon. No surprise flavors!   2.5 servings per bag   per serving: 130 cals 1 gram carbs 12 grams protein 9 grams fat
joatsaint

joatsaint

3
 

NSV #2 - You Best Step Off, B-hatch!

They say the journey of a thousand miles begins with 1 step. What they don't tell you is that the journey is a b*tch if you're on step 1!   1/14/2015 Well it's been a few months since I last walked. November to be exact. With the cold weather and injuries and sinus drainage, I was pretty much out of commission. We were at it hard during September and October, hitting new highs on speed, sometimes going as fast as 3.9 mph for 3 miles.   But November, my partner hurt his ankle and was out for 3 weeks, then I got terrible sinus headaches from breathing the smoke from neighbors burning piles of leaves and then the cold rain set in. So here it is, the middle of January and we haven't walked a mile per day. Fortunately, I've actually lost weight in that time and kept it off. My new job keeps me moving quite a bit.   8/26/2014 Wish there was more the report, but it's still HOT in Texas. Most days the temp is around 91 with a heat index of 101 when I walk. I've had to start wearing a water soaked towel around my neck and a hat while I walk to complete 3 miles. I've come close to heat exhaustion a few times and had to head over to the water faucet and soak my head till the dizziness clears. I thought I'd have built up a tolerance to the heat by now, but doesn't seem like that is going to happen. Good news is, the worst of the heat is over, once we hit September temps will slooooooowly creep down to the low 90's every evening. And by October, we'll be back in the 80's. I can't wait to see how fast I can do 4 miles when the temps are down in the 80's. Hopefully, I'll break the 15 minute mile. :-)   7/30/2014 I know I keep saying this, but OMG!!! IT'S HOT IN TEXAS! The good news is that today was a cloudy day and I managed 4.25 miles @ 3.6 mph. I should be up and above 4 mph by the time cool weather rolls in during October.   The heat is still in the 94 - 95 degree range with a heat index of 101 - 104. And as Madge said on the Palmolive dish-washing detergent, "You're soaking in it." :-P I'm still walking 5 days a week and hugging every inch of shade I can find! But I had to cut back to 3 miles, down from 4. I was just getting too dizzy and sick - even with using a water soaked towel to keep cool and carrying a water bottle. Monday, I had to stop at 2.5 miles and go soak my head under a water faucet. I hit a point and knew I had better get cooled off or something bad was about to happen.     7/24/2014 OMG!!! IT'S HOT IN TEXAS! For the past week it's been between 91 and 94 degrees with a heat index of 101 - 104... during the evenings... when I'm walking! I've had to begin carrying a wet towel and carry a water bottle to prevent dehydration and heat exhaustion. But aside from that, I've managed to walk between 3 and 4 miles in about an hour, averaging 3.5 - 3.7 mph. And haven't missed a day this week. But you gotta believe it when I say I was looking for ANY excuse to skip walking after work. But alas, the weather has been clear during the evenings and all the rain has managed to miss my exercise hour. I wonder how much it would cost me to have a crop duster fly up and seed some clouds just around the time I supposed to start walking????   7/04/2014 Another 3 miles (including 1 mile in total of jogging in short stretches) in the record book. It still amazes me when I think back to just 18 months ago when I would go to bed wondering how much it would hurt to walk from the car to my desk at work.   The Texas heat is a monster and I was really dreading walking (I mean baking) in 94 degree heat with a heat index of 101. That was yesterday! But I got rained out at the last minute. :-) ****Does happy dance**** I know, I know, I should be like those workout gurus and tell you how much I missed not going out there and sweating my ass off. But I gotta be honest and say I will take any "HONEST" excuse to duck out on walking in this heat. When I say "HONEST EXCUSE" I mean just that.... a real, "believable", reason (rain, when my car had a flat 2 weeks ago, or I feel like I've been pushing myself to the point of injury or sickness). Skipping a walk just because I don't feel like it is not enough.   So this morning the I had planned to walk with a friend at Claiborne Park just north of Vidor, TX. We normally do 3.25 miles and I've been increasing the distance I've been jogging. But the radar shows rain headed right for us in the next hour or so. So we cancelled it.   Instead I ran around my neighborhood. One lap around my block is approx. 1/2 mile. 2 long sides and 2 short sides. In 70 degree weather, I managed to run 12 of the short sides for a total of 1 miles....And the amazing part was I could have done more! So we'll see how much more tomorrow when I'm back out at Claiborne.     6/29/2014 Can't believe how well my attempts to jog are working out. Averaged 3.5 mph for 3.25 miles today. I walk a figure 8 style track and managed to jog the 4 straightaways all three laps. My next goal is to jog 1 mile non-stop. Shooting to reach that goal by the end of July. If the heat gets to be too much for me, my fall back plan is to go back to wearing the 30 lb weight vest and speed walk the trails.   6/19/2014 Another 3.25 miles down. Speed is still slow at 3.1 mph. Temp 91 degrees. Managed to make the whole circuit on 13 swallows of water. It's a pain to have to carry a water bottle on the trail, but it beats getting heat stroke!   It's been tough getting used to the Texas heat. The heat's really been kicked up a notch since the end of May. I thought it was bad when the temps were in the high 80's. Oh how I long for those days. My walking partner calls me the shade hunter. He's much more tolerant of the heat. He can walk in full sun for the whole 3.25 miles, while I zigzag on the trail - going from one patch of shade to the next. I think I may actually be walking farther than him, but he carries the GPS, so I have to go by his distance and time. Doesn't matter to me though, just completing the whole trail every day is a win.   06/18/2014 Man is it hot! The Texas Summer heat is just getting its stride and things are baking in the park. I'm up to 3.25 miles each day/ 3.1 mph while wearing a 30 lb vest. Fastest speed without the vest was 3.6 mph for 3.25 miles. Thinking it might be time to try the couch to 5k plan. Not really sure all this effort is worth the results. It's a vicious cycle - the more I get in shape the farther/faster I have to walk to burn the same amount of calories.   ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10/02/2013 Hit a new personal best time at the park. 3.2 miles an hour, did 3 point something miles in about 53 minutes or something close to that, I've forgotten the exact time. :-) But at least I'm getting better, both in distance and being able to recover enough to walk at the same intensity day after day. It seems like only yesterday (actually it was Jan 2nd) that I started my walking program by taking the long way around the office to the bathroom. :-P Just goes to show that taking small steps can add up to bigger things later on.   7/11/2013 Well, I lost Gilligan, my pedometer. I named him Gilligan cause he was my "little buddy". Not sure where he ran off to. I left the house with him on my hip and at the end of the day, he was gone.   So now I have Gilligan the 2nd or Gilligan the Next Generation, depending on your point of view. Gilligan II is a little smarter, so hopefully he won't get lost. He keeps track not only of my steps and mileage, but takes into account my weight, lists calories burned, total steps, aerobic steps (meaning any walking continuously for 10 minutes or more) and tells me how long I've been aerobically walking . And he remembers everything from the past 6 days.   The good news is that I've graduated to a 2 mile trail in a local park. It has lots of ups and downs - and the occasional rabbit/armadillo/snake/Pimp butterfly on the trail to keep things entertaining. And I'm able to make the walk 6 to 7 days a week.   My 1st goal was to be able to complete the 2 miles every day 6 to 7 days a week. I have reached that goal as of July.   The next goal is to start increasing my speed. See if I can break the 45 minute mark for completing the trail. Current best speed is 46 minutes.     5/17/2013 Finally! Made over 10k steps a day for 6 days in a row. My original goal was to do it for 5 days in a row. Plus as an added NSV, I have graduated from walking on flat, level surfaces to walking in a parking garage. I do the 1st 5k steps in the morning on level ground, but at lunch, I step it up (no pun intended) by going out to a 3 story parking garage. Having to walk up those inclines between floors add a whole new level to the phrase "pain in the butt!" :-P   I was walking next to a coworker yesterday and she said, "I smell smoke." I said, "That's me. I'm not just hot, I'm SMOKIN!"   For those out there that have feet and knee pain like me, it pays to move, no matter how little. That's how I started out 5 months ago.   I could barely walk from the parking lot to the store without limping and being in a lot of pain. But I always parked at the far end of the lot and minced my way into the store. And I set a goal to walk the inside perimeter of my office every time I went to the bathroom or had to leave my desk. That was 4 to 10 laps a day.   When we move to a bigger office in Feb. I set a goal to make 4 laps a day around the office (approximately 1200 steps plus the 500 steps from the parking lot to my desk got me up to about 1700 steps a day).   When I got to the point where I could tolerate the 4 laps with no lasting pain, I added 4 laps at lunch. Then 5 in the morning and 5 at lunch till I could do 10 each time. That took several months to accomplish and I usually only could do that at most 3 days a week and be in pain for the other 2 days.   Now 10 laps twice a day is too easy, so I changed to going into the parking garage at lunch. The inclined ramps are easy on my ankles and ups my aerobic activity. Plus it gets me out in the sun - gotta have my Vitamin D!   That's how I did it. Little changes add up. Now I've got 2 ladies a work who SAY they want to start walking with me - but so far it's only been talk. :-)   This is from today, 5/17/2013. It's gonna break my heart to reset it in the morning!     2/19/2013 Just checked my pedometer when I got home and finally crossed the 10k steps goal or 4.5 miles in 1 day.   I usually on get in around 2.5 to 3 miles a day, but today I had a lot of extra walking at work and for the 2nd day this week I've been able to walk additional laps around the building at lunch.   Hopefully my feet and hips will allow me to maintain or surpass 10k a day from now on.   Update:3/28/2013 Still managing to get closer to my goal of 5 miles/day, 7 days a week. I'm averaging 4.5 miles/day 4 days a week. My hips no longer hurt, just some muscle soreness. And my feet are usually only a little painful after walking but the pain is almost gone the next day.   The people at work are starting to take notice of my walking before work and at lunch time. Commenting on my weight loss, that may sound encouraging, but I'd rather stay unnoticed and unremarked on. Noticing my weight loss and exercising will only lead to questions - ones I'd rather not answer.   I've had one or two people comment on how much they need to start walking with me, almost daily, but they never seem to find the time to do even one lap around the floor with me. I never made those type of comments when I'd see people working out, cause I knew that I wasn't going to make the effort. So why try to fool them and me? If I did, it would feel like I was apologizing for being fat and feeling guilty for not exercising.   I didn't feel like any kind of exercise plan was going to do me any good. I was too far gone. As Ralphie May said, "This is way past a diet coke fix."     3/4/2013 I'm still walking 3 - 4 miles per day, 5 days a week, but getting past 10k steps a day is tough. My feet and hips are pretty sore the day after doing that many steps and it limits me reaching 10k more than 2 or 3 times a week. But I keep working at it. As long as I'm walking every day, I'm getting closer to my goal.
joatsaint

joatsaint

14
 

NSV - Peeing Like A Man

Well, this is embarrassing to admit, but for the past 2 years I've had to sit down to pee. At some point my gut and the fat pooch above my junk got too big and it was a real hassle (and messy) to use the urinals. So it was just easier and cleaner to sit on the toilet.   So it was a happy surprise when I realized yesterday that I could use the urinals again. My job requires a dress shirt.   I hated having to drop trou, tuck my shirt tale back in, and fight with my belt every time I went to the bathroom.   Now I can go back to hosing down the back of the urinal and destroying the cigarette butts at the bottom. :-P   P.S. They must think guys are pretty dumb around here. I saw a sign above the urinal that read, "Please don't eat the big white mint!"  
joatsaint

joatsaint

6
 

Night Man Coming

My 1st week post-op I was having a disturbing dream over and over. I was in a post-apocalyptic world, taking psych eval tests to determine if I would fit into a new group that was forming to rebuild society.   And I had a very frustrating recurring dream about uploading video files to a website, but it was taking forever for the files to convert and upload!   After thinking on it, I think it was my mind's way of dealing with the pain from surgery and the frustration of how long it was taking to recover.
joatsaint

joatsaint

0

PatchAid Vitamin Patches

Bariatric Forums

For Patients

Health Professionals

Search Surgeons

Bariatric Surgeons: Want to research a weight loss surgery surgeon? Enter their last name below to start!

×