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first week of appointments

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First 2 Weeks Post Op - Nothing Like I Expected

Let me start with this; no matter how much knowledge you accumulate before this surgery, you can’t be fully prepared as to what will happen after surgery. I went through and read so many posting of people struggling with food, cheating, wondering why they hadn’t lost weight. I couldn't understand how someone could go through this surgery and do that to themselves. I knew I would NEVER jeopardize my health or my new little sleeve after surgery by cheating or going off the Dr.’s plan...   Surgery went great, I lived through it and recovered quickly with the most pain being the first few hours after getting out. Within days I was able to take normal drinks of liquids and stayed on a liquid diet with no hunger until Monday morning (4 days out).   Tuesday I ended up eating five saltines and boy did I beat myself up for it. I called my Dr. and begged for them to change my one week appointment to Wednesday instead of Friday because I physically felt like I could NOT wait all week to start full fluids and protein shakes. Appointment got changed. Wednesday morning I went and saw the PA and she said I was OK-ed for full liquids and soft foods. I was 16.8 lbs down at the first week visit. So that day I had two eggs and several bites of my husband’s country fried steak for breakfast. Two hours later I felt famished and had some more of his country fried steak. I continued eating eggs with cheese, slivers of crockpot roast, pan fried chicken w skin, lunch meat, cheese, turkey jerky bites, salami w cream cheese rolled with a pepperchini topped with green olives ( I ate around 25 of these over a five hour period, felt like I couldn’t stop eating them). My sleeve tolerated it with no problems. I realized the insane cravings for copious amounts of food came from me being on my period. Btw, weighed Monday morning and I GAINED 5lbs, not surprised in the least.   Sunday Day 10 comes and it was a HUGE turning point. Went to my Grandpa's to celebrate a family birthday and He made tri tip, a whole ham, all the sides. So I put a slice of ham and tri tip w green beans on my plate. I start with the ham and green beans, I get an ounce of ham down and get a terrible fullness and gas in my stomach. Strange, I never had that before. I literally could not eat anymore and I felt sick. So I go home and my husband’s friends are over and they make chicken and mushrooms for a late dinner. I eat a small piece of slightly greasy chicken and 10 mins after I am in the bathroom puking.   FINALLY!!!! I feel like my sleeve is working. I get totally full off 1-2oz instead of the 4-6oz I was consuming. I am shocked. The hunger is minimal and comes up around the 3 to 4 hrs after last meal. Insane! The last few days it’s been hard to get to 400 calories, are you kidding me?? I didn’t think it was possible judging from the four day binge I went on. I also switched back to softer food. I know I was justifying food as soft that was not in the soft category. Now I'm eating tuna salmon, baby shrimp and eggs. I lost 2 1/2 of the lbs I gained.   I honestly do not know why there was such a delay in me feeling the effects of the sleeve. It took a long time for me to be able to pass gas, almost 6 days because my bowls were having problems "waking up" after surgery. Maybe my stomach did too? This is my husband's theory and it is the only one that makes sense as to how I was fitting so much food in and never feeling satisfied until Day 10.   I did NOT plan on sharing this with anyone. It is embarrassing and shameful. I jeopardized my health because I didn’t get control over my hunger. But I decided to share because maybe someone else out there is new out of surgery with a ravenous appetite and might possibly be able to relate or learn from my mistakes. More importantly I would hate for anyone to feel as hopeless as I did, thinking that this surgery was a total mistake. During those few days I would not have trusted anyone had they told me things would get better and eventually my hunger would subside -- but it DID! Every person's body is so unique and will be different through this process. For some of us it takes longer to reap the benefits of this surgery. And trying to distinguish between real hunger and head hunger is no joke, I think this will take years for me to deal with. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel. So keep jugging along... I think can! I think I can!
TamaraS

TamaraS

6
 

So Incredibly Disapointed In Myself

I ate 5 saltines and I am less than a week out of surgery :'( I cant believe I would do this to myself. I read about people who cheated and was in disbelief that they would have surgery and do that to themselves. I seriously couldnt fathom how any one could be the weak willed and viola, here I am 6 days out eating crackers... terrible. I could have injured my stomach. I dont know what the hell is wrong with me. I am so incredibly upset with myself. I was not at all prepared to have any hunger after this surgery. Boy was I wrong. the last three days I feel like I am starving. I obviously cant re do eating those crackers but I hope and pray with every bit in me I learned my lesson. I am so ashamed. I hope this isnt a preview of what is to come with me...
TamaraS

TamaraS

11
 

Approved!

Seminar July 5th   Surgeons office visit August 24th   Nutrition class August 27th   Psych Evaluation August 30th   Insurance request submitted September 10th   Approved September 17th!   I really didn't think this day would come. So many personal hurtles and worries about insurance. Im estatic! I really look forward to starting my new life which won't revolve around food. It's going to be hard, so hard, but it will be so worth it. I just hope and pray I make it through surgery <3.  
TamaraS

TamaraS

5
 

Head Hunger Articles- 1St Two Articles Are Particularly Awesome!

Excellent article on Emotional hunger Vs. Physical hunger http://www.livestrong.com/article/14885-emotional-vs-physical-hunger/     Am I hungry? important questions to ask- http://amihungry.com/whatisamihungry.shtml   Recognizing hunger signals - http://www.myfooddiary.com/resources/ask_the_expert/hunger_signals.asp   Head Hunger- http://myfoodmaps.com/head-hunger/   3 steps to take to become aware of head hunger http://www.livestrong.com/article/512246-how-to-tell-the-difference-between-real-hunger-emotional-hunger/?utm_source=popslideshow&utm_medium=a1   head hunger - http://www.palmyrasurgical.com/adjustable-gastric-band-guide/living-with-your-gastric-band/dealing-with-hunger-after-surgery    
TamaraS

TamaraS

0
 

Waiting For Ins. Approval? Call, Call, Call!

I called my surgeons office making sure they received all my paper work and results from all the testing I’ve completed. I am so ready for this surgery and really want to know if the insurance will cover it for sure. I completed all of the things specified by my insurance but I learned that my primary Dr. never signed off on the surgery :/. I personally took the papers over to his office and the girl at the front desk told me he would sign them that afternoon and fax them to the surgeon’s office (and that was two weeks ago).   I call my primary Dr.’s office today and find out that my Dr. will NOT sign off on the surgery until I get an EKG. I am pretty frustrated at this point because if I had not called I would have never known that my insurance request was not submitted. Not one person from my Dr.’s office called to tell me I needed to come in for this and it isn’t an insurance requirement so the surgeon’s office wouldn’t have known what the holdup was. I am totally for getting an EKG, just disappointed I was not told earlier. This process over the last three months has been a series of errors. My suggestion for those of you completing your requirements for surgery is to CALL, CALL, CALL! Double check and triple check your info is being received and what the requirements are for your insurance, your surgeon and your Dr. I am lucky I only had a two week hold up, imagine how long it would have been had I not called!!
TamaraS

TamaraS

6
 

Thoughts Of Death

I have been so focused on getting approved for the surgery, focusing on other people success and imagining my own that I hadn't really thought much about the possibility of dying in surgery until recently. It’s terrifying. I have a six year old boy. when my grandmother had passed in April, it was the first death He had ever experienced. I just keep replaying through my mind when he told me "mom if you ever die and go to heaven, Id make myself die to so we could be together" indescribably upsetting words to hear your child speak :’( Three nights ago I was lying in bed and panic came over me as I thought of how I will be putting myself in a position where it could definitely happen (DEATH) if I go through with the surgery. I’ve read differing statistics: 1 in 400 die, 1 in a 1,000 die, and honestly those don’t sound good. I woke up the next day still very much worried. I sat in my recliner as I do every day because my knees hurt. I watched t.v. and played on my laptop as I do every day, to numb my mind of my barely getting by existence.I sit home alone in isolation most of the day until My beautiful boy gets home and then I’m too tired to play and have a short fuse with him because I’m constantly exhausted (just like every other day). A couple tears ran down my face at the realization that my hope for a better life has to be stronger than my fears of dying this time.   Im not happy being in pain and always tired. I’m not the good mom or wife I know I can be. I can’t fulfill my dream of becoming a nurse because I can barely shower and dress myself with out resting in between. I have had to stop wearing socks with my shoes because when I try to put them on, I pull muscles in either my leg, stomach or back. My life is so far from where I want it and I know I can get it back on track with this surgery. I might die because of this surgery. I will definitely die early if I don’t get this weight off. But I might be able to live AFTER this surgery… I don’t consider this living now.
TamaraS

TamaraS

14
 

My 1St Week Of Appointments

I just had my first consultation this last Friday! I was so anxious and excited I could barely sleep the night before but the actual appointment was very basic, not at all what I had worked up in my head . I met with the surgeon’s physician assistant and filled out a lot of paperwork and discussed how the surgery was performed, length of time in the hospital (2 - 3 days), nutrition, she asked me some questions about my obesity history and current health problems, I took a short quiz and she also asked me why I wanted the surgery. After about 20 to 30 minutes she sent me to talk to the girls who deal with insurance and they sat me down and told me the requirements of my insurance. I have California Anthem Blue Cross Medi-Cal so my personal insurance requirements were to get primary doc’s approval, a tsh test, see a nutritionist and a psychiatrist and get them to state I was fit for surgery. Most insurance also want a 6 month doctor supervised diet although that was not the case with mine. As soon as I got out of the appointment to the car, I made my nutritionist and psychiatrist appointment. I just finished them both yesterday and I feel so relieved!!     The meeting with the nutritionist I paid for out of pocket because it takes insurance a while to get around to approving you to go. I met with her Monday and the cost of the appointment was 65.00. My particular registered dietician was very pleasant. When I arrived I had to fill out the diets I been on and what I ate the last 24 hrs. It took a while for me to recall the info. We spoke for an hour and a half. She had lots of children’s play food and empty bottles of protein shakes and vitamins which she used as props as she went over the new way I would be eating. It was very helpful seeing the portion sizes while we talked since I had no idea what small amounts I would be able to consume. She asked me questions about how much I usually eat, the kinds of foods and when. Most of the time was spent with her telling me about the different stages of food intake after surgery and reinforcing over and over chew at least 20 – 30 times, no water with meals or up to an hour after, and the importance of protein and vitamins. At the end of the session she tells you whether or not she will recommend you for the surgery and then has to create a report (can take up to two weeks for her) to send to your surgeon. By the way, she never asked me what surgery I was getting and assumed it was for the gastric bypass. Make sure you tell them on arrival you are getting the sleeve! Our appointment ran over 30 minutes because she had given me bypass info.     I went to see the Psychiatrist yesterday. I also paid out of pocket to get in and be seen sooner. He was the least expensive at 150.00 but some of them went up to 450.00. I spent around 45 minutes there. I will share something with you; I wasn’t at all nervous about seeing him but as soon as he seated me in his office and went to go get paperwork for me to sign, I had an anxiety attack. I wanted to get up and run out of his office for no explainable reason. I knew if I didn’t get his ok for surgery I couldn’t get it so I am not sure if it was self-sabotage or if I just put too much emphasis on the importance of the meeting. Either way, he was gone long enough for me to pull myself together and as soon as he started asking me questions everything went really well! The majority of the appointment was him asking me questions and I realized my answers were too long based on how he kept cutting me off! I’m sure you can tell by this, I am all about the details. Better to keep it short and sweet with the psych since they have so much information to cover. The questions were about where you grew up, family relationships, have you seen a psych before, medications you have been on, any history of trauma, are you an emotional eater, what’s your stress level like, hobbies, do you have a support system, what you expect from the surgery and why do you want the surgery. He then gave me a survey to take home of almost 400 questions which ask about drug/alcohol abuse, violent or suicidal tendencies and self-esteem. (I did the survey in my car outside the office to cut down on mail time to send it back.) At the end of our appointment he told me he would be recommending me for surgery! What a relief     Now I just have to play the waiting game and wait for the registered dietician and the psychiatrist to send their reports to my surgeon and hear if my insurance approved the surgery! If the surgery approval comes through I will take a four hour pre op class and that’s it!!
TamaraS

TamaraS

2
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