ok so I have hit the mother of all stalls.And all the doubt and all the anxiety has returned.
Am I eating to much?Am I eating to little?What should I eat?What am I doing wrong.I must be doing something wrong.
I know,with the rational part of my brain,that I have TOM and the 2 pounds that I am up is normal for this time of the month.My housekeeper reminds me every morning when I storm down the stairs in a bad fat mood that this is the way its been since surgery and that I look thinner to her.She is so sweet.And such a LIAR..lol!
It has been quite a while since the scale has moved and I dont know how to survive these stalls.My mood still depends way to much on the number on the ruddy scale.I must say I dont weigh near as much as before just because I just dont have any expectations anymore,which is not a good thing!
I am just so scared every time I hit a stall that it will nwvwr end and this is as good as its going to get for me.
But nothing I do changes this so I guess I will just have to sit it out.(this is punishment for always thinking that peolple who said they stalled were cheating with their food..lol)
For the past week I have been thinking of what to write for my one year update.
Firstly,I dont regret having the sleeve as far having lost the weight and the way I am looking.It feels good to be thin even though I have loads of extra hanging skin.
But,and I am so sad that there has to be a but here...
I went into menopause at the age of 45 3 months after having the surgery.At the time my dr said it might just be because I am losing a lot of stored estrogen and the symptoms might disappear,but it didnt quite go away.I now have a period every 4 mnths or so and hotflashes,as they please.Horrible to be dealing with this now.Anyway,I am dealing with it.
I am bruised black and blue the whole time.Bruises that is clearly not casued by bumps as they are in such strange places.My bloods are all out of wack,different ones every time I have it done.The amount of pills I have to take is unreal.This would be fine if it wasnt affecting my stomach the way it does.I now have to add carafate to the PPi I am taking.As for the bruising,no one seems to know why this is happening and I am due for more tests in the next couple of weeks.The one thing that has also changed drastically is my lipid profile.My TC was never high,I had great HDL and LDL was normal.Now my HDL is super low,my LDL is super high and my Tc borders on high.Who knows how the heck that happens while losing 137 pounds?
About a month ago I started having symptoms of peripheral neuropathy.I dont want to comment on this too much as I am still inshock dealing with the burning,tingling and pain in my hands and feet.I hope this will go away with the supplements I am taking as I have no idea how one live with this indefintely without going stir crazy.
Just to top all this and make it more interesting,my neck,back and tailbone is giving me hell.I seem to be growing a hump om my upperback and the kids tell me I am bent like the moon.I have a lot of upperback and neck pain but the bad thing is I cannot atand for longer than a couple of seconds before my lower back is killing me.I can sit and I can walk,no problem.I just cannot stand.
I am extremely sad that things are not as straight forward for me as for others as it would have been nice to enjoy being at goal at this point.To have dealt with my fears about having plastics as I am almoat ready to so it I dislike my arms that much...lol.
However I am constantly trying to deal with some health fallouts at the moment.I am so scared that this will be my life now.Hands and feet on fire,a back that cause for me to have to sit down all the time.A neck that keeps me awake all night and to top that I look like I was in a bad accident or fight,all the time.
This all sounds so negative.But I might have gotten sick just from being fat if I didnt have this surgery.If only dealing with these issues werent so complex.If only there were some easy answers and fixes.I am a fixer.I am a doer.If something is wrong,fix it and most of my issues I cannot only not fix,I can hardly manage them.
Maybe in a couple of months I will find myself healthy.Painfree!Burn free!Free of bruises!Taking less than 15 pills a day.But for now I am a little fearful about my future.
And then I want to just delete this post as it isnt what I want things to be like and about.
But then I will leave it to read in a little while when things are better and the problems have been resolved.
Part 2 will talk about all the nice stuff...like wearing a size 36B bra..hehehe!And having bought a size 10,yes a size 10 broadshort, yesterday!Not all is bad and life does go on!
Since the 13th I have lost another 3 pounds for which I am very happy.
But today I had a fat day.Where I am not satisfied with my weight loss so far and I wished I could just enjoy anything I ate like I did before the sleeve.Silly really as I would allow myself "anything" if only I knew what that was.
I dont find pleasure in food anymore.It is not fun to eat anymore.But then my little kid tells me that eating is not fun.It is nice to eat good food but it is not fun.Fun is stuff that you do,like swimming or dancing or playing a game...lol.And she is right.
And maybe I feel like this because Im getting a cold again OR
Or maybe it is because of this skinny woman at my kid's gymnastics who never speaks to me, that for some reason tonight, decided to loudly and in front of everybody say,O you've lost so much weight.I can even see it in your face now.Are you following a specific diet? To which I answered,yes very specific...lol
Whereupon she said, o its very hard but its got to be done! In front of everybody!!!
And goodness knows why that got to me so badly.of course everyone comments on the weight loss but this was just embarrassing for some reason.The be-atch in me wanted to say to her and maybe if you changed that horrid hairstyle of yours you would look so much better too.Its very hard,but its got to be done! But I didnt.and I have never been too sensitive about what others would say,goodness as a fatty Ive had to bite my tongue a few time in my life when people would make comments.So whats up with me now?
Crazy thing is whereas I was just thinking about food today,I came home and actually had a packet of weight watchers crisps which I dont even like.So Ive been thinking of how I need to get over myself and toughen up a bit.I cannot let peoples comments get to me.Since we have this big family reunion in December (my housemate's family not mine) and boy are they a bunch of rattlesnakes (hehehe...she doesnt want to go if we dont go with her) of course they will make their snarky comments.I can bet top dollar that the extra skin on my arms will be mentioned a few times and my eating this little will be critized now,I have to not allow myself to eat "away" what I feel.Maybe,just maybe I should for once say these quick comebacks that come up in my head out loud.That might just shut people up.But I wont,because I am not like them.
I suppose this is life and a good nite's sleep might just give me back my perspective.And tomorrow I might have a thinner day!
when we went on holiday in July I lost loads of weight.eating out all the time,no tracking,counting carbs no execise (ok,I didnt exercise at all until then)
Now,back in our old routine,I have startes exercising loads.I burn about 3000 cals most days and about 2300 on the days I rest.
My food on execise days are about 1000 cals (naturally more hungry days) but on non exercise days at 800.
The lack of consistent losing is still driving me batty!
My head is seriously done in by this.
I have considered stopping the exercise again but boy am I flabby!On the one hand exercise is not going to help me reduce the skin at all but it might help for the additional blubber to even out.I am very lumpy on my legs.
Sometimes I consider doing fluids only for a day or 2 but I hate protein shakes.And I drink way to much tea with milk when I dont eat.Besides that the moment I decide to do fluids I want to eat....lol
I know I am super impatient about this as the average weight loss is still 1kg a week but I want to lose more.It is amazing to me that others can be so happy to just plod along.I try but fail to be happy with that.
Mainly I am impatient as I feel stuck above 200.199 would have been fine to sit on for a while but boy I want to be out of the 200 so badly.
It is an issue that I am thinking of eating so often.Maybe if that was different I wouldnt have minded losing slower but it just feels like a super strict diet that I am on.I am trying to get hold of some half and half so that I can stop worrying about the carbs in the milk.
And maybe I should just add carbs to my diet now so that my body can adjust to that and lose weight while eating carbs again.It worked just fine for 5 months,why wouldnt it work now?
Writing these things down helps me.I've looked back on this blog a few times and it changes my perspective sometimes to see that there is good times and bad.
So,weight is still 205 and I will only post again when it is down some more.
A positive post this next time as I have started using this as the place to whine!However,I have stopped talking about the weight loss and food issues with others and when I finish here,I feel better and can face the day with a more positive outlook.
Having said all this,I am a crazy optimist that would expect a weight loss tomorrow just to often be disappointed again.Maybe the issue really is the fact that I am weighing every day.It is difficult to not get on the scale though.
Ok,upwards and onwards!
This blog has saved my life this morning.
The sleeve is seriously messing with my head.I thought I was in a looooong stall.In the mean time I have only not lost for 5 days.
The pattern with wich I lose is so different from before.I usually drop a few 100 grams every day,or most days.
Since being sleeved the weight will stand completely still for a week,sometimes a little more and then I drop about 4 pounds.But I mean completely still....not down even 100g.
Somehow my head is seriously done in by this.I just dont get use to this.My obsession with the scale is somehow more in control.It is not a matter of jumping on the scale every time I walk past it anymore.But I still get very anxious if I dont weigh every day.Cannot figure what to eat as I doubt myself so much,even when I track the food on fitday.Keep thinking maybe I had more,maybe Im not real about it...even when I weigh the food.Somehow when Im not losing I feel like I am doing something wrong even though I know Im not.
I suppose my fear that I will fail is still huge as I still feel I failed with the band as I did lose the weight but regained it.I am so resistant to believe that this will work as my big yap coudnt keep shut about the surgery and everybody knows.Maybe that is also why I havent climbed on the intense exercise band wagon yet.
Anyhoo,upwards and onwards christian soldiers....lol
Its my birthday today and I decided to buy food from a place called limetree.They make the most delicious salads and quiche and of course,carrot cake.I bought 2 salads and 2 slices of quiche for 4 of us and I had a tiny bit of each...or thought I would have.
Since this morning i have had a tummy ache like I have gastritis. (know what it feels like as I had it often while I had the band).I had a few bites and fed the rest of my food to my 11 year old that came back from camp today and was starving.Then I cut the 2 slices of cake in half and for myself half of half....and it made me feel so sick.
Had a nice long bath afterwards and then at about 22:00 I decided that it is m birthday and I am allowed to eat..got myself a little tiny 100 calorie packet of sweet chilli ryvitas,minis, and low and behold,at about 5 and have been spitting it out ever since.Just like with the band the food just seems to pop back into my mouth..I dont vomit and the food is really clean just as it was when I swallowed it.
I have realized once again that I cannot at his point eat just to eat...even if it is my birthday.Food have to be more functional and the protein thing is something I will have to get right.
Sweet stuff makes me feel horrible and i seems nothing tastes as nice as before the surgery.
Maybe if I try to get a bit more serious about exercise I will feel a bit more serious about the adaptations I have had to make around food.I am just struggling a bit with the very small portion size...like I've said before,just when I get ready to eat I am full.
Ok,this day is over and maybe my tummy feels better tomorrow.
As I cannot comment while on the Ipad (dont know why) I thought to write about it.
I honestly hope it is not my galbladder.Before my sugery I decided that as I am so scared of surgery,I will have my galbladder out at the same time as sleeve.When I went fo galbladder sonar I told the radiologist to find a stone...just even a 2mm stone pleaseeeeee!He said he would.He spend such a long time doing an xray and doing a sonar and searching for something wrong with my galladder.then they did a functional galbladder test where you have to go and eat high fat food,wait half hour and then do test for when the galbladder start working....well mine took almost 2 hours before it started and yet he didnt think it was delayed.Just slow but normal.No stones.the surgeon came to look an said hey dont like taking out such healthy organs.At That I backed off...he said 60 persent stays healthy only 40 persent gets removed...I asked him what if I am one of the 40% and he said but what if you are one of the 60%.
I am not planning on another sugery before I leave this country.I only have 3 months left of end of year issues at school,gymnastics competitions for my daughter and a trip to the USA to see where we are moving as i've never been there...and a Month holiday in South Africa to see my folks...moving from one country to another takes some planning and dont need the stress of surgery as well.(and as it is the company has complicated issues with the possibility of a move to the UK instead of the US but we think living in America will be nicer)
So no,it is not my galbladder.I have gastritis or something that will clear up tomorrow after I have played squash for the first time after sugery....lol.I am on super soft to mushy foods to help the stomach recover.
xxo
And Im down 128.2 pounds.Weighed in at 168.8 pounds today.Only 4 pounds from my dr's goal.Not too bad if I might say so myself...lol
Am still all over the place with the eating at the moment trying to find my "normal" again but plodding along which still seems to work for me.
I will start exercising.Ok,I dont even believe myself anymore.But I should,I know.Still playing squash twice a week though.
Have revised my goal for myself to 154 pounds.70kg's or maybe 69.8 will be even better...lol.I might take my time getting there though or then I might just decide to seriously low carb for 4 weeks and drop all of it in a month (lost 14.6 pounds from mid November to mid December and 6 from Mid Dec till now) I can be done but is it important to do it so fast at this point?I am going to wait with PS till sometime later this year so there is no rush now.
Things I need to work on.
1. Exercise
2.water.I dont drink water.I drink tea with milk.Lots and lots of it.I need to drink water.
3.vitamins.I need to have my labs done and take my multi every day with the extra vit A and C
Ok,thats it for now.
Tip for newly sleeved.Listen to the wize people that says start exercising immediately.
Now that I have started I can see how much more wobbly I am than befoe.Previously when I had to exercise from day one I was muxh more toned by the time I had lost 40 pounds.My legs are especially soft and now hat I have started I dont know why I didnt do it before.
Will start doing weights this week to see if I can catch up a little.
For some reason I am sure the weight loss will start moving again as well.
xxo
Ps.for some of the comments The speed with which your food passes depends on what it is and how much fibre is in the food.That is why I am eating more fibre.Maybe salad doesnt have nutritional value but it for sure helps me not be as constipated and it gives me great pleasure.Mind you I now add other stuff like grilled veggies too as I like it and I have missed it so much.I cannot oly eat proteins.My serotonin levels goes vwry low for some stupid reason (always have) if I cut out all my carbs.so unrefined carbs like veggies seems to do the trick for me and I am a happy sleever.I will start tracking calories burned the moment I get my new BODYBUGG.MInd you will try the old one until it gets here.
If I burn 500 additional cals per day while eating 800 I will lose weight,I know this for sure.
xxo
So,what I thought was a problem might turn out to be a blessing.
I dont know how big or how small the dr made my stomach...what can I do about it at this point anyway?
The fact that I can drink so much more and with such ease might turn out to be a blessing.I think if it is difficult to drink that in the long term,people will drink less.
In summer it gets up to 50 degrees celcius ( 130 farnheit) here in Dubai and you need plenty of water to not cook in summer.
I also know that I will use the next 12 months to teach myself how to eat and apreciate less but quality foods,for the rest of my life.
In the next few weeks I will join OA and I will seek the help of a therapist if neccessary.
This will not be just another food limited low carb diet.
At the moment I am struggling to do the protein.I am still on full liquids and the yogurt,soup and protein powder (1 scoop) does take me to 600 cals or more but not to 60g of proteins per day.
Must say,eating will be better for getting the amount of protein per day.
9 oz of fish,poultry and meat or eggs per day will give you the right amount of protein,I think.
You live,you learn!I dont know how to stay in the calorie limits.I DONT KNOW WHY!
Today I was 181.2 pounds.
The holiday starts next tuesday when we fly home.I am super excited as my family havent seen me since July and I have lost a lot since then.now I weigh less than both my mommy and my sister and they dont like this much at all.Will not talk much about weight loss and try to put the focus on them (in July I tried to put them on diet...lol)
The kind of foods I eat changes about every 2 weeks.It seems I get something I really enjoy,eat it almost every day for 2 weeks and then get tired and move to something different.I should just list the old favourites so I can start cooking something different that I like every day.It seems like I forget what I use to eat and liked very quickly..lolIt looks like someone else might be using your account
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I will take some protein shake for pancakes and some syrup with on holiday.Thank goodness Woolies have some great pre prepared protein that has no added carbs like chicken,meatballs,little kebab scewers ect ect.I will live on it and the abundance of great seafood.
I now wear a size 12 top and 14 bottom.It also seems that I will end up smaller than a 12 which I find unbelievable.
At the moment I have become quite shy and am way to easily embarrassed when people make a big fuss about my weight loss.And boy,some people have no end and selective amnesia,or they just dont really see me as week after week at church the same people act so surprized about my size and make a scene infront of others.But I shouldnt complain,people are just people.I do avoid some social situations sometimes as a lot of my very overweight friends are so uncomfortable (shame,they act guilty and start talking about their weight and plan when they will diet) that it makes me sad for them.
I use to be very outspoken and critical of people that said they'd made new friends and left behind old ones after surgery.The old friends were the ones that loved you and cared about you when you were fat right?But I am starting to understand this now a little better.How long do I expose myself to people that are not spontaneous in my company anymore?How long do I act as if their comments about living long for their kids so they will never do this surgery (they are overweight,joint issues,back ache,high blood pressure ect ect..how wiil they live longer?) dont slightly annoy me?How long do I have to make jokes at my own expense (ah,dont worry I am thin now but when I lift my arm my batwing knocks me unconcious..hehe,not so funny anymore)(ugg,its true,I need boob lift,arm lift,body lift,thigh lift and maybe face and eyelid lift)
So,I do think in this wonderful trancient society that I live in,some new friends that dont know that I was ever that big,is on the new years resolution list.Just some people with whom I can relax and be myself.Will still see and love the old ones but they better get over themselves pronto as I am proud of the fact that my sacrificing my stomach and all my hard work after hat has paid off,and one of these days I will have the confidence to say so.In the meantime I am trying to be patient and loving and kind to them.
Ok,now for the next 5 pounds,fast..lol
Realizing that I didnt talk about the surgery itself much,that is what I will do today.
But first: surgery day was on the 13th of March 2012. I weighed 287 on surgery day,292 for the first week post op and I am 267.5 today.....almost 20 pounds down plus the extra I had in fluid weight after surgery.This makes the whole experience worth it....or almost.Last night I regretted putting of our road trip through the USA....I would have liked to have sampled all the different lovely foods that they show on cooking channel,and the food seems to be especially decadent in America....o well,too late now..LOL
Surgery day and day 1 after was extremely difficult for me. I was not really prepaired at all for what I experienced...even though I had the band before.But if I could survive that,any one can!
Today My weight is the same than last week but I am doing good.No gin and tonics..lol,clean eating!
Cauliflour does not agree with me,even when pulverized in the food prosessor,dont know why.
ThenI decided to put what I ate in December,lost nearly 17 pounds in 6 weeks,into fitday to see how many of what I was eating.Calories worked out to 1200 plus per day.Fats were 55 plus and carbs were about 70.
At first I thought I must have made a mistake.But I did it twice and the results came out the same.
This is shocking as all I ate for weeks were the following.I would take chicken breast,cup into atrips or veal cut into strips or pork cut into strips and dust it with flour.17oz of chicken takes about a cup of flour.Then I would put olive oil in the bottom of the wok and fry it.When the oil was gone,I would add more!I didnt measure it but I am sure that it was a lot that I used!
Now,maybe I didnt eat as much as I think I did.Maybe I ate less of it after a week or so as usually when I eat protein only I gradually start eating less.I had 5 cups of tea with milk and 2 dolci gusto cappuchinos per day.Very little water,maybe one small bottel during the day and half at night.
With only 2 pounds to goal I am going to try that again this week.
At 10 and a half months out I do feel that I can eat more and should start weighing my food again.I ate like this because I regularly get a stomach ache when I eat veggies.Any veggies.I also cannot eat fruit as this causes acid even though I am on a PPI.
Now to just reach goal already and then to decide if I should drop more weight.Acouple of my friend's husbands no less,have commented that I am now getting to skinny.Thr girls just say they dont recognize me!I just wish I could see what other people say they see.(they might always be lying..lol)
I now wear a size 12 pants and top even though I havent lost more weight but it is very clear that my shape is changing,and not all for the good.I have saddlebags on my upper legs that appeared over the past couple of weeks and my boobs are now a size 36 C.One thing I never realized was that as we get older our waistline increases even when there isnt fat anymore.I use to be very curvy when I was young but now I am straight as a plank and my waist seems to have widened...lol.But I need to just get this weight loss phase over and done with now.It still takes up too much of the space in my head and I just dont want this anymore.
I had a bit of a realitly check today when I witnessed a motorcyclist die in an accident.Life is short and all this seems so much less important tonight and in the bigger scheme of things.Accepting myself and others and living life the way the Lord has intended fo me to do is what my focus should be on all the time.I am second!But while Im counting and weighing and logging and cooking and posting I do get a bit consumed with myself which is not the way I should live my life!
One more week to goal (positive self talk..lol)
when I arrived 2 days ago in SA I weighed 227.My folks live in a retriement village and this year my mom cant walk a lot at all.She needs a knee replacement.This is a tough one.I can see since she's stopped exercising she has gained weight.The thing that I thought would help keep me on track is exercise.But we will do a lot of sitting down just being with them.lol
Food is a nightmare.It is winter and I cannot figure out how not to constantly feel like something warm when it is cold.The food they eat is so different.Lots of carbs (my dad looks like a skeleton) The one thing I can do with them is take then to coffee shops and eating out.Salads seems like an alien thing in the cold.Soups are loaded with calories,low fat cappucino is unheard of ( we only have full fat milk madam!).I have eaten chicken 4 times in 2 days and well I will keep figuring this out.
On the emosional eating side...mmm...well,my sweet cousin that is the same age than me (is like my sister) is in ICU after a fall with very bad brain oedema and brain heamorage.I am so sad as she seems to just have the worse of luck in the world.In 18 months she got breast cancer ( in limf) before she could have chemo she had a bloodclot in her lung,the found she has Protein S deficeincy,she has kidney failure,her mom died last month and now this.She had the old JIB bypass surgery and I am convinced that this has been the cause of most of her medical issues.She has been sick with fever of unknown origin for 4 years now.AND OF COURSE I WANT TO EAT.And I know this will not help anyone or anything but I have always been a comfort eater.Tried a few nachos with guacamole and sourcream last night when out and I felt dog tired afterwards.This is just so crazy as yes it is carbs but why the tiredness?
Today we have a BBQ which should be fine as there's lots of meat.
Lets see how it goes!
I suppose being up for longer than 36 hours is not very helpful when making food choices.
I had half a crossant on the plane.Then a piece of chicken for lunch (good girl) but for dinner they were having fish and chips and I had about 7 chips and a too big piece of fish.I dont slime or anything.I start getting pain and then the food just keeps coming back up in my mouth.
This should be a lesson today.I need to be aware and not make stupid choices I will regret later.
Tomorrow,I will just have a carb free day.Will go and buy some chicken and smeat balls and satay kebabs that I can just keep on hand to eat when I need to.
Will update i. The afternoons to keep me accountable.
last night I forgot to take my nexium.at 5 I woke up with severe burning in my throat.I took the nexium but had severe stomach ache all day long.
Now I've been wondering.My dr said that the stomach will adjust the amount of acid over time.But how can it while I am taking a PPI in the morning and in the evening?It blocks acid formation,doesnt it?
Some other dr's patient dont take a PPI automatically from the beginning and a lot of them dont have the acid issues at all.
At the moment with the threat about senseless questions going so furiously I am to scared to aks any questions really...lol
Will try to research this or ask on obesityhelp.
xxxo
For 4 years I had constant pain in my hip and upper leg.Since buying my tempur bed and 3 months post op,no more pain!I sleep so much better and well,no pain.
Every time I exercise my "bones" ache so badly that I just want to quit.Execised again today and now the sides and front of my lower leg has this deep ache.I hate drinkng pain killers but for a while at least I suppose I will have to take 2 panadols to help me with the sleeping at night.Since I have started sleeping better for the first time in years,I am not prepaired to give it up,no way!
But exercise I will.No more cop outs and excuses!None!
Often I see posts on what happens when people take "one bite to many"....well,that has never happened to me.I can actually eat quite a lot.Usually I try not to but we've been entertaining a lot lately.Tonight after dinner I had something else to eat and for the first time I had a single hick up that I was wondering am I now full,is this it?that feeling of slight tightness in my chest and a hick-up?
It is so crazy to hear people say they cannot make 800 calories when I have to stop myself all the time or I would usually average about 1000 whr I eat what I really want to.
Then the thing of cutting carbs.I dont do more than 60 carbs on a high day but for me that is high in carbs for weight loss.When I low carbed before I had to stricktly stay under 20 for it to really work.
When I do low carb I feel a little on the depressed side.The feel good factor just disappears from my life and I start craving crisps and chocolate badly.
I am really worried that I will fail with this sleeve.I am not really dieting as I have this stange reaction of having no expectations so I will not be so disappointed.I suppose in a way after the struggle with the band it is normal to feel this but I will have to pull myself toward myself and start getting with the program and exercise and eat only the right food.
I will do this.
Earlier I posted this post about being sick of the sleeve and desperate and doing the duodenal switch...blablabla...yada,yada,yada........
Then I went back to the gym to play a game of squash.We played hard and fast and my goodness it felt soooo good.
This all made me decide that I will lose more weight.Even if I have to learn to run a hundred km at a time.I will do whatever I can to lose the last 38 pounds.
My friend is a personal trainer and I will start train with him next week.I need to start doing some serious muscle building.
My goodness,why would I not lose weight if I really work hard?Why do I feel that its not fair that my weight loss have stopped?Who said life was fair?
No more chip on my shoulder about this.Yes,I might have terrible days where the scale might affect my mind but I will think positively about losing weight and getting to goal.
Tomorrow morning before we go out with friends I will do some exercise and in the afternoon I will either go and swim in the sea or I will go walk while it is still 97 degrees!(swim sounds like fun!)
Jippee,the weight is coming off.I am down 24 pounds and I am getting excited about this new way of life.
It will be very easy to do to many calories in a day.I liquidized 4oz of chicken breast with 2 tablespoons of ff creamcheese and it was 220 calories.then I had 2 oz of my homemade meatloaf which was another 150 cals.the milk in my tea per day works out to 150 cals per day.then at 4 I had a protein bar because I felt like it and well that was another 180 cals.that totals 700 plus a bonbell cheese at 50 totals 750 and I havent had dinner yet.So this is where the discipline will have to start.
1 protein drink per day at 220 cals and 50g proteins per day.Then,no more liquidized anything.I will now learn to eat solids.People says that chicken and tuna is soft foods but I will have to make it soft.
I will really have to learn how much to eat.I am going nuts as I dont think I will be able to keep to such low calories.Anyhow,lets see what happens.
Since surgery I have had an issue that I didnt discuss much as no one seems to have the same problem.
I get a thick white coating on my tounge and in my throat that has been driving me insane!It got progressively worse over the last month.
Yesterday I realized it must have soemthing to so with the milk Im drinking.I cut back on the milk,but not a lot,and because of this I became dry.I could feel my lips was even getting dry.So,I tackled a bottle of water,which I dont do often as I still struggle to drink water,and almost immediately the mouth started feeling better.
Today I cut the milk a little more and had a lot more water.My mouth was actually fine most of the day except tonight when I had a large cup of tea with lots of milk and didnt rinse my mouth immediately.I am now chugging some water and my mouth already feels better.I still dont know why the milk does this but I now realize that water is super important.Not tea,not crystal light but water.
My mission for this week is to double my water intake.The dr halved my BP meds and there is a powerful diuretic in it.Of course I will have to stay away from the scale for at least a week (hehehe...who am I kidding?) as I will go up in water weight.But they say the best cure for that is more water.Will also juice some celery and cucumber as it is a diuretic as well.
Went for a dexa scan today and some bloods.Vit D and A is low.LDL is still a bit high but HDL is also high,which is great!Will see what the B12 is like.
Ok,now tomorrow I am going to exercise.I think if I keep on saying it,it will be so!
today I weighed 198 pounds for the first time in many years.
It seems I really did need an attitude change...lol
The food is still mostly proteins.No obsessive behavior there...a few carbs makes no difference but boy do more exercise make a huge difference.
We now run up to 6 km 3 nights a week.It is still 95 degrees some nights and it takes a lot of mental strenght to go out there.But I want to lose weight.
Tuesdays and Saturdays we play roun robin squash for more than 2 hours.
Sundays and Tuesdays I have reformer pilates class.On Monday,Wednesday and Friday we run.
I also try to do some circuit training in the gym twice a week.Should step this up a Little to build more muscle but its a work in progress.
I am very,very,very,very achy all over.My right leg (in front from the thigh right down to my lower leg) aches all the time and sleeping without pain killers is DIFFICULT.But I want to be thin.
We went to a Ill Divo concert last night and this morning my friend told me that I looked very pretty last night.She says people looked at me.This really freaked me out as I am tall and my hearts desire has always been to just blend in with thw crowd.Now I feel even taller for some reason and I know one notices taller people just because we stand out.All this means I have to start dealing with my fear of man or my life might be a little difficult in future.
I will post pics of before and after tomorrow if I switch on my mac.Ipad does not upload onto this website and I cannot figure out how to upload with my Iphone.
So,I've now lost 99 pounds.To celebrate we are going for a run tonight.Also to see how far we can run without stopping so that we can start with a more structured running program
