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Adventures in Sleeving

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Don't feel sorry for me, seriously.

I have been very forthcoming about my surgery with all of the important people in my life and also many people who would qualify as acquaintances. I don't see the point in hiding or lying about it. If anyone things that I took the easy way out, that is really their issue. I know that I have to do the work for all of this and that the surgery might help me, but it isn't going to "fix" me. My father and I are not close. Sometimes I hear from him every two weeks, sometimes every two months. This is ok with me, because he is a difficult person. I love him because he is my dad, but I wouldn't be able to tolerate him if he wasn't. He called me this evening and when I told him I was having surgery in two weeks, he asked why. I had mentioned this to him before and he quickly changed the subject. I don't know if he wasn't listening or if he just didn't want to discuss it. I didn't push it, because we aren't really close and he is entitled to his opinion. Today he said, "It makes me sad that you feel like you have to do that." I told him that I am doing it because I want to live, not just exist. I also told him that I am tired of having my weight hold me back from doing the things that I want to do. I think he was coming from a good place, but it was frustrating for me that he just couldn't be happy for me. I don't need his pity, that's for sure. I am proud of myself for taking things into my own hands and I am definitely not going to let him take that away from me.

courtines

courtines

 

This is all happening so fast.

On August 15, 2011 I had a consultation with a bariatric surgeon and now my surgery is scheduled for October 10, 2011. In some ways things seemed to move along glacially and in other ways I feel like I just made this decision yesterday. I was blessed with a fairly easy approval process that hit some bumps in the road: 1. The psychologist that was supposed to do my psych evaluation went on vacation and no one bothered to tell me, and 2. My PCP office took 3 weeks in getting my paperwork back to my surgeons office because they lost the papers on 2 separate occasions. I know these are minor things compared to the hoops that other people have to jump through and I am blessed that my insurance coordinator was on the ball with everything. She even got the psychologist to call and apologize to me personally, while he was on vacation. She also managed to put the screws to my PCP's office and managed to get them to fax her the paperwork the same day she sent it. She is a rock star. Today my surgeon's office called me with my date and it was a lot sooner than I expected. I called my boss and she is willing to give me the necessary two weeks off. I am a little worried, because things are so weird at work right now, but hopefully it won't have a negative impact on my job. I am hoping that my mother, who lives 4 hours away will be able to come and babysit me for a week. It would be nice to have her around and I am going to need some help dealing with my three rowdy beagles. My husband and daughter are both going to have school, so it would be tricky for me to handle these things on my own. I did it last winter when I had a broken foot, but I would prefer to have a little help. I am excited, but I have a few fears. I have never had surgery before, so I am very scared that something bad will happen to me during surgery. I am terrified of leaving my daughter without a mom. However, that is also the reason I have decided to have this surgery. I don't want to have a heart attack in 5 years and leave my daughter motherless. She has assured me that my surgery will go great.

courtines

courtines

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