It's been a while since my last entry. It hasn't quite been 3 months since I had surgery. My official anniversay will be December 20. To date, I have lost 49 lbs. My Christmas goal was to be 50 lbs lighter but since I am so close to achieving that goal I amended it. My new goal is to be a total of 55 lbs lighter by Dec. 31.
During my short journey there are things that I am still learning like the importance of slowing down when I eat, not eating too much, not drinking while I eat, and the the ever present vitamin! I take my multivitamin on a daily basis it's the calcium citrate that I sometimes forget.
Lately, exercise has been null and void. I know... I have to get better with this. I'm sure the weight would melt off faster if I incorporated a regular routine.
Not all is lost...I do eat healthy and I am very conscious of my protein intake. At my last doctor's appointment I was told the majority of my protein should come from food and that I should only use the shake as a supplement if I miss a meal.
Another plus is since surgery which was on September 20, I have gone from a snug size 20 to a comfortable 16. Ross has become my very best friend. They have some really cute and affordable clothes in there. Despite the smaller clothes, to me I look exactly the same. I guess I'll see what everybody else sees soon enough.
This has been an amazing, life changing, well worth it experience!
Whew... there is so much going on in my life right now, I really don't know where to begin. Guess I'll start with the latest change of events...
I have/had a friend at work that I chatted with throughout my work day and went to lunch with daily. Not often, but a handful of times we interacted outside of work (I'd invite her son to my son's birthday party, an invitation to a cookout, etc.) Anyway, two weeks ago (11/4), my job suffered a tragic loss when one of our partners passed away unexpectedly. As a result, the office closed early and she and I didn't have a chance to really talk.
Fast forward to last week (11/7), I assumed she wasn't in the office because I hadn't seen or heard from her. Our late partner's funeral was 11/8, and she knew him well as they worked on the same floor. I called to check on her the following day and got super shot, snappy answers to my questions. I'm thinking... ok she needs some time. So here we are, into another week when everything comes to light.
Yes, Ole Girl was upset about the passing of such a wonderful man, but the reason she's not speaking to me is because I didn't tell her about my surgery - CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?! As of today I've lost 40 lbs and my co-workers have been paying me compliments. Well she tells a few of them she knows I've had something done and she thought we were better than that and the least I could do was tell her if I'm on diet pills, had surgery, etc. When a co-worker asked her if her feelings were hurt she said no, she upset because I owe her an explanation and until I tell her what the deal is she doesn't have anything to say to me. Really?! She's upset because I didn't tell her my business.
I don't mean to be so cavalier about it but... oh well... guess we just won't be talking. Admittedly, for a little bit I was in a state of you've-got-to-be-kidding. However, as time passed, so did that feeling.
I owe her an explanation?!? Really?!? WOW!!
You hear so much about protein, protein, protein but no one told me I could get too much protein - YIKES!!! I am probably one of very few people that actually enjoy my protein shakes. Since Day 1 they have never been a problem for me to drink.
I had my surgery on September 20, and I thought the weight would simply melt off. I've heard about stalls and slow weight loss I just never thought I'd be in either one of those categories. After all, I'm dinking my protein, taking in plenty of liquids and doing well with food. Exercise is another story all together, but I digress. On post-op day 19, I called my physician's office to ask a few questions and before I hung up I asked if it were possible to have too much protein and was told yes!
My protein shakes are 28g and I have 3 of them a day. That's already 84g of protein. Greek yogurt is 16g. That's 100g already and that's without my soft meats (I'm in the mushy phase). Tuna, salmon, talapia, etc. is protein. On average I was getting in close to 135-140g! That's too much. Not to mention, protein builds muscle so if you aren't walking or exercising you may gain. Of course if you're just coming out of surgery you can't really exercise but you can walk which I haven't been doing. No wonder the scale isn't moving!!!
My doctor said to decrease the protein (keep it between 70g-90g a day) and get moving! I have lost some weight. I've lost 30 pounds since surgery, and I know I have to take it easy because it's only been 3 weeks but I still need to do my part.
Too much protein...who knew!!
This may be slow in coming but I've come to realize something...this change is truly a process and is very, very different for each person. Prior to having surgery, my physician and his staff provided me with tons of information at each appointment. I have a wonderful binder (my bariatric binder) chronicling step by step, and day by day things from vitamins, what to expect before and after surgery, pre-admissions, examples of meal plans, what kinds and times to take in liquids, etc. It is so informative and I refer to it at least 20 times a day.
During my appointment, my doctor as well as the on-staff nutritionists adamantly steered me away from certain carbs. I was under the impression as soon as something sweet or some bread like substance hits your palate I'd regret it instantly. It was/is because of this that I have stayed on point. That and I'm only 3 weeks post-op. Anyway... I've read the occassional post where someone may have had a weak moment (nope, I'm not judging) and they never mention getting sick. How can this be???
Of course this is his profession, but I now know my doctor is really committed to steering me away from the potentials of what contributed to me having the surgery in the first place. Yes, these things could possibly make me sick but why go there. He's actually aiding me in my lifestyle change by assisting with changing my mind set.
Just one more reason why I love, love, love the bariatric staff at Temple University Hospital!!!
so good. Tuesday, September 20, 2011, at 8 AM I had my surgery. Before hand, like many of you, I had second thoughts: am I doing the right thing, did I really try hard enough to lose the weight, am I taking the easy way out, am I really ready to give up the food and change my eating lifestyle, etc. Because I had been praying about it for what seems like forever, and my family had been praying I had peace and comfort and forged ahead.
After the procedure naturally I slept like I hadn't slept in years. I mean the good, undisturbed, morphine enduced sleep that I so needed - LOL. Later on that evening, around 11 PM, I was awaken and told "come on, time to walk." I didn't think I would be up to it but it really wasn't that bad. With the next day came another challenge -- liquids. I wasn't given anything to drink in the morning but at 3 PM I was given 6 oz of chicken broth. The first 3 oz went down with ease and suprisingly I didn't feel full but I knew I needed to stop sipping. I had the last of it around 5 PM.
Home a day after surgery - yeah, I though it was a bit early too - it was time to operate in the real world. Time to apply all of the things my doctor had told me, the nutritionist shared with me, and all of the super helpful things I've read from all of your experiences.
Today, I'm sitting here 4 days post-op, getting in roughly 48 oz of liquids a day, in mininal pain and taking it easy. Initially, I said I was going to go back to work after a week but I've decided to go back Oct. 3.
Oh, and as if things couldn't get any better pre-liquid diet I weighed 323.6 pounds. The day of surgery I weighed 311. And as of yesterday when my home health aide/nurse came, I weighed 295!!! Oh happy day!!!
I know I just did a blog entry but as I previously stated - I have a lot on my mind.
Anywhoo, I have a friend and he is very supportive of me having surgery. He's fine with me the way (size) that I am and initially when I shared with him that I wanted to have surgery and later told him that I was definitely having surgery he was and has been nothing been supportive, cooperative and understanding. HOWEVER, just about every conversation we have he mentions the surgery but not necessarily in a bad way.
True examples:
We were talking about how quickly the weather had changed and just as quickly for no rhyme or reason he says, "when you have your surgery and you're all thin I'll still love you."
We were talking about 2 Fast 2 Furious and out of the blue he says, "will you still love me when you're thinner after your surgery?"
He asked if I enjoyed vacation with my family and before I could answer he said, "guys try to hit on you now, but after your surgery will you continue to ignore them? You're not gonna leave me right?!"
While talking on the phone he kinda worked my nerves and I was hang up and he said, "and the transformation begins. Before your surgery you had more patience now you don't." Then you caught himself because I haven't had surgery yet.
There's always some reason to mention it, how he knows I'll be after I have it, the "transformation", etc. He's a wonderful guy and I love him.. I do, but today I questioned for the first time why on earth did I tell him. Of course I had to because he is who I bounce things off of, he's a special friend and he cares about me, and I wanted to share it with hm, but...UGH!!!
I almost feel like I did when I was pregnant and I had the urge to handle everything. When I was 7 months I was so tired of waiting for my husband to paint the nursey when he came home from work I had it done and had the furniture arranged. That's how I feel now. I have the urge to clean, throw things away, make sure bills are handled, things at work are beyond organized, etc. I know this is because I have so much on my mind, surgery is on Tuesday and I want to be prepared. Yesterday I went to get my protein powders and vitamins so I was able to scratch that off of my To Do List. I still need to stock my fridge/freezer with the things that I will need after surgery. My mind is on so many different things every so often I have to say, "Nicole, take a deep breath and relax".
Calgon take me away...
So...today is Day 2 of my liquid diet. Initially, I was so psyched about this portion of my journey it didn't matter if my physician told me I could only have one can of Slim Fast to sip on for the entire day. Keep in mind I said initially. Today, however, I am singing a new tune. Although I love the flavor of the Slim Fast I AM STARVING !!! At this point I don't know what I want more...sleep or food. Yesterday I was not this tired. Today, I feel like I haven't gotten any rest. I'm assuming it's from the lack of food. I'm still encouraged and am looking forward to the next leg of my journey which is surgery on September 20, but right now... right now I'm exhausted and could go for some extra spicy buffalo wings with chucky bleu cheese dressing on the side. But since that's not gonna happen, I guess I'll just have to take a deep breath and hang in there! *Huge sigh*