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April 15th

Well, I have my first appointment with Dr. Fisher. I'm very excited and yet nervous. I went to my first nutrition appointment with H.E.L.P., which is the only place recognized by my medical insurance. I also went to the psychiatrist, and she feels I'm a perfect candidate with not too many mental issues.... lol. The physiologist wants me to start water aerobics since this would be the only type of exercise I can do. So, I'm going to do that on Mondays starting tomorrow! I found out my current weight.... 380 lbs. But that's down five pounds since seeing primary care doc two weeks ago. So changing my diet has helped some.
Billie Elaine

Billie Elaine

3
 

The beginning....

Well, I've made up my mind about the lapband surgery. I'm very excited. My biggest fear is that I won't do well on it and/or have complications. I'm so tired of hurting. I'm so tired of just being fat and having no will power. I wish I knew what I weigh. I'm too afraid to find out actually. My goal is to just get healthy and feel better. I quit smoking and that was tough! I can surely do the same mind set and work on losing weight.
Billie Elaine

Billie Elaine

1
 

Tough Times....

Well, I haven't been doing as well as I should. I was working too many hours.... got stressed and was craving something sweet. And to top that off, I'd ran out of my almonds and couldn't get to Conrad Farms to get more! :cry   I'm back in the saddle so to speak though, and I'm working hard again to get back on track. Dr. Oz's book has been so helpful in understanding how everything works. I started taking two baby aspirins a day along with 200 mcg of chromium picolate per his advice. I do seem to be doing a little better.... or I was until I hurt myself in water aerobics! The pain has set me back again. I'm barely able to walk now. I just want this pain to stop so bad. I'm trying so hard not to get discouraged and be thankful that I'm lucky to be alive and able to walk. I could've lost my life.   I talked to a man today who'd been in a car accident too. His carotid artery had been severed..... he was bleeding to death. Luckily for him, it was in front of a veterinary hospital. The vet did emergency surgery on him and sewed his artery back up and saved his life! A doc is a doc is a doc.... an artery is an artery is an artery. It was amazing to listen to his story. So I shouldn't be so upset when I have little set backs.   I feel as if I can get my "house" in order then my life will follow. I'm working on cleaning out the old to make room for the new.
Billie Elaine

Billie Elaine

1
 

Meeting Dr. Fisher!

:clap2: Well, finally got to meet with Dr. Fisher. It went rather well. He said I was an excellent candidate for the lap-band. Yeah!!! I'm still sticking to my healthy diet. When I get hungry, I now eat red grapes and/or almonds. Amazing how well those curb those craving times. Went to see Karen, my behavior modificationist. She was really nice. She felt like I was on the right track and would be very successful with the lap-band. She wants me to take ownership of my comments. I'm gonna try real hard. I'm so excited. This is the first time in a very long time that I feel that I have the power to change my life's course. I'm hoping the weight loss will also reduce the pain.... that would be so nice. I'm also walking a smidge more..... and trying to relax when I walk instead of tensing up waiting for the pain. I think the tensing up is causing most of my pain. Deep breathing and thinking about the steps is helping a lot.
Billie Elaine

Billie Elaine

1
 

Ouch!

Well, I knew it would hit.... just didn't realize it would be such a hard whap! Craving for something sweet almost made me insane today. But, I held fast and instead had a bananna and some almonds. :faint::faint: :faint: :faint:   Glad I'm home so I have any temptations around.... those yuckie vending machines with all their alluring sweets... lol They call my name continously. How do they know my name? lol   I'm also reading "You: On a Diet" by Dr. Oz. It's a really inspirational book and is helping me understand my cravings and how to overcome them. Obviously it's working, or I'd have eaten my way through a couple of those vending machines today!   Well Journal, I'm tired and meeting with a personal trainer first thing in the A.M. - guess I need to hit the hay so I'm not wore out totally....   :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: Thanks to God for getting me through another day!!! Thanks for not hurting so much today. Thanks for getting great calls today and not getting yelled at. Thanks for making it through those bad sugar cravings. Thanks for making me happier.....
Billie Elaine

Billie Elaine

1
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