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A blog by deedee

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I'm Overweight!!!!! And some other stuff...

Well, I just wrote a thread about a couple of successes and then went to change my ticker. Guess what? I am no longer obese. My BMI is now 29.8!!! I cannot believe it...this sleeve is amazing. I am still a work in progress when it comes to this new lifestyle, but every week I get better. Food is no longer an addiction, but I am falling back into some addictive shopping behavior patterns that I worked hard throughout my 20's to overcome. I did much better this weekend with my shopping and didn't spend nearly as much money as I had a few weeks ago in part because the clothes I bought a few weeks ago are already starting to look frumpy. I'm convincing myself that I do not need cute clothes at every size and also think I'll buy more dresses that I can wear through multiple sizes. Unfortunately they do not have very good thrift stores around here and the consignment shops (that I have found) only take really high-end clothing and I'd spend much more at them than at discount or regular department store sales. Did I mention that I LOVE MY SLEEVE!

October 19, 2009

2

Learning to live

I flew across the country at about 5.5 weeks out of surgery. I was still on soft/mushy food and was pretty nervous about both the flight (5 hours direct) and the 11 days I was to spend with my grandmother, family, and friends. Well...I'm now back home almost 7.5 weeks out and down an additional 5 lbs. I wasn't perfect in my eating--ate too fast many times (definitely felt it), ate more carbs than I had been, and missed my protein goal some days--but I feel like a complete success! I feel this trip was the beginning of my new life (I know it's sort of corny). It helped me realize that although I must plan ahead when it comes to food and exercise, I do not need to be obsessed about it like I had been in the pre-op and direct post-op period. I now understand that the last couple of months I have been making real lifestyle changes, not just dieting, and those changes were evident on my trip based on the decent food choices I made and fun I had incorporating exercise. Another interesting food related thing to happen was when I went to a favorite chain restaurant with friends, I discovered that without being able to scarf down food with liquid, it really wasn't that good. I am now a lot more conscious about how the food tastes seeing that I only get a few bites before being full. Overall, I learning to live with this wonderful tool and finding that I love it!

September 25, 2009

1

TMI...NSV sort of (might not want to read)

A little background... So a big reason for me to have WLS was to be healthy enough to get pregnant. A year ago this month I had my first appointment with a fertility specialist. At that time my cycle was anywhere between 55-80 days (I think). I remember that they gave me medicine in November to bring on my period so they could do 3 day blood work, and it still took 11 days before my period actually came. They determined my fibroids were so large (as well as small) and numerous that I needed to have them removed before proceeding with treatment. I was also diagnosed with PCOS (although my PCP had diagnosed it 2 years previous as well). I had the open surgery to remove the fibroids in Jan. 09 and my next 2 cycles were fairly normal (around 36 days). Then I started really packing on the weight and had an 80 day cycle. I began researching weight loss surgery (there were other factors as well). Well, for the NSV... This month I had a 28 day cycle! After the last two years, it is just so amazing. I actually recorded the date I thought I ovulated and it was exactly 14 days into the cycle. I am so excited and hopeful that this will continue.

October 22, 2009

1

Not so great week...

This has been one of the worst weeks I have had post VSG-not related to surgery, just with stress. Due to this stress my eating has not been what it should be (not planned out at all, skipping meals, stopped at Subway twice, lots of peanuts) and although I've managed to keep up with daily exercise, I am just not losing (fluctuating one pound up then one pound down). I've heard and read that stress can cause us to hold onto weight, and I'm sure coupled with poor food/eating habits has not helped in the weight loss department. So today is a new day and the week is not yet over. I took the day off for a physical and plan to hit the grocery store and get back to planning my meals. My husband and I had a heart to heart last night, so I think those issues are pretty much resolved. I hope I'm back on track to meet my next weight loss goal of weighing 165 lbs on my next follow-up visit with my surgeon on 12/2. That's 3-4 pounds I have to shed in 2.5 weeks. I think it's doable, if I just get back on track. On a positive note, I found out yesterday that I passed the movement screening for Jazzercise and can now begin preparing for the audition in February. I was so very excited!

November 19, 2009

4

I can do this!

Okay, I think I can do this! I freaked out a little about lowering my carbs and upping my protein for my pre-op diet. Although I've been on and off of diets for 20 years, I have never tried a high protein diet because of my addiction to potatoes. The first week of trying, I was visiting family in another state. I had a mini-meltdown when I discovered I really did not know much about carbs in the foods I ate. I decided that I did know that I could eat meat, cheese, lettuce, and eggs. So I decided I could really focus on protein for breakfast and lunch with no or very little carbs and then not stress about dinners. I thought it was at least a start. Upon my return home, I had another meltdown. I was exhausted from the 13 hour drive the day before and just wanted something to eat. I had a protein bar for breakfast and one for lunch, but realized I would need to go grocery shopping. To tide me over I decided to have a yogurt and as I was eating it, read the back and realized how many carbs it contained. That's when I lost it. I felt that I did not have any idea what I was doing and that maybe this surgery wasn't going to work for me. Thankfully my husband was home and decided we needed to take a field trip (I'm a teacher, so he talked to me in my terms :-). I protested feeling that I needed to read the two South Beach diet books I had picked up and make a plan before heading to the store. He basically said that this wasn't that difficult and I could do it; I'd been talking daily about surgery for the last three months and reading like crazy. (A little background: my husband exercises at the gym 7 days a week and eats pretty healthy all the time, but never really knew how many carbs certain foods contained...he just makes sure to eat a balanced diet and stays away from potatoes.) We got to the store and started going through the isles reading labels and putting together foods I liked that could be for breakfast and lunch and snacks. This went really well and I was surprised at how many things we found. This all happened Wednesday, and I can say that each day I grow more confident that I am making the changes I need to to live a healthier life. I've also discovered that I enjoy cooking. We did go out on Friday and I was very pleased that I didn't crave fries. I had a salad without dressing and a chicken burger without the bun. On Saturday, we went to a baseball game and stopped by Subway (one of my favorite fast food places) and got a spinach salad with chicken and a cup of dressing on the side and didn't even use 1/4 of it. Tomorrow I meet with the nutritionist, so we'll see what other changes I need to make, but I feel good right now and think I can do this.

July 5, 2009

1

Protein

Yay! I'm getting very close to my surgery date now. Tomorrow I will begin 2 days of a clear liquid diet and have surgery on Tuesday. Over the last couple of weeks I've been trying different protein powders from the list my nutritionist provided and suggestions I've read here and elsewhere. I found one last week that I could tolerate a little (Syntrax Matrix Orange Cream) and ordered a tub and got the vanilla tub as well. Like I said, I could tolerate it if I sipped it very slowly, but I kept looking. Well, I just got some samples of Chike protein and I LOVE the orange one mixed with milk. From what I've read it is supposed to be used as a meal replacement because it's higher in calories (especially after the milk I add), but I'm hoping that I like it just as much after surgery. I'm thinking I can use it for a meal and then use another one (lower calories) for supplement purposes. I should be receiving Nectar samples soon and still have some Unjury samples (didn't like much) that I can try after surgery. On the other hand, my husband tried the chocolate Chike (I don't like chocolate unless it's a Baby Ruth:-) and said it was okay, but he likes his current one better--I thought I was the picky one. He has been a gym rat since about 9th grade and has used protein supplementation for many, many years. He did say if he had to switch to that one, he wouldn't mind, but his is much cheaper and can be purchased at the local store, so I don't think so. Just goes to show how this is such a personal taste thing for everyone. Well, I've got to help my friend prepare for her 2 year old's birthday party and get ready to eat my last real meal pre-op. I still plan on following the low carb thing today--I've done pretty well with it and have lost 17 lbs (not quite the 10% they wanted, but my surgeon was still happy and applauded my effort).

August 1, 2009

0

Huge NSV!!!

I really love Lily Pulitzer clothing and a few years back they stopped making size 16. I was upset, but went ahead and bought a dress in a 14 at the end of one season (when it was like 60% off) with the goal of being able to wear it after whatever diet I was on at the time. I never once have been able to get it zipped, when I got really heavy last year, I couldn't get it around my hips. Well, this dress sort of served as my carrot. Every weekend since I started my pre-op diet I have tried it on. This weekend I had another big closet clean out where I try everything on in my closets, dresser, and under bed bins. I got to this dress and told myself that maybe in another couple of weeks it would fit perfect, but guess what...IT ZIPPED! I was so ecstatic!!! I had told myself that it would eventually fit, but to actually be able to zip it up was WONDERFUL. I had my husband take some pictures, I'm going to try to post one here and in my profile. The funny thing is, I don't really like the dress that much now that it fits, but it is such an accomplishment that I will always keep it. Edited: cannot figure out how to put a picture here, so it's just in my album.

October 25, 2009

2

Thought I'd Share...what lead me to the sleeve

I just responded to someone trying to decide which wls to get, and while I think this is a very personal decision, I thought I'd share that response here. It was a good way for me to remember and reflect on my thought process. Hello there, I completely understand where you are coming from with weighing your options here. Ultimately I went with the sleeve because from everything I read about the band I KNEW it wouldn't fit my lifestyle. Yes, I understood that this surgery provided a tool, not magic :-) and we must work it, but I wanted a tool that would be as maintenance free as possible. I read lapbandtalk.com quite a bit and also asked my surgeon (well my husband did) about fills and unfills and finding that "sweet" spot. The surgeon basically said that the majority of people would be at a good restriction with the band by their 4th-6th fill. When my husband asked what about the others and the percentage who are not, the surgeon stated that in his experience some people (about 20 % of his patients) take 8 + months to find the right restriction. Like everyone else, I wanted this weight gone yesterday, and didn't want to find myself in the camp still not at a proper restriction a year out. The reason we were questioning the surgeon re: band fill/maintenance was because both my husband and myself had similar fears as you. We were concerned with the permanent removal of so much of my stomach with the sleeve, although by that point I wasn't too concerned, but he was. I'd seen written many times on message boards...I want this weight loss to be permanent, so I want a permanent tool and that made sense to me. I read about many people, who had stomach cancer, living just fine with smaller stomachs for decades and that coupled with my own "laziness" and worry about never getting the proper restriction had me switch directions towards the sleeve. Another thing that pushed me were the stories I read of people needing to have the band removed due to erosion and scarring, nothing they could even control. I did not like that possibility at all! Now on to the sleeve. IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST DECISIONS I HAVE EVER MADE! As you know I am a little over 4 months out. I am down 62 pounds since the day of surgery and 78 pounds since beginning my pre-op diet (modified Atkins) on July 6 (so 5 months ago). I am definitely eating regular foods and in the last 2 months have not had any trouble getting anything down, sometimes I "slime" or choke from eating/drinking too fast, but I can drink water pretty quickly now without choking. Unfortunately the last month I've let some "bad" foods slip back in and started snacking quite a bit, which has lead to a slow down in my weight loss and caused some mini-stalls. But a couple of days ago I recommitted myself to getting to goal and this morning I was finally down another 1/2 pound. I know that I am not the fastest loser, but I'm happy with the success I've had so far. Below you will find some of the things I attribute my success to besides this great tool: *Consistent exercise: I do Jazzercise 4 days per week, tap dance once per week, and the first 3 months walked 2-3 times per week (hurt my foot last month and haven't made it to the doctor...it comes and goes, but I'm afraid the doctor will make me stop exercising for a while, I'd rather just limp 2-3 days per week). *Only drink water for the most part (and protein shakes when I can make myself) *Visit the message boards and post when I can...this really helps me stay accountable, although the last couple of weeks even that didn't seem like enough *Attended all of my post-op appointments...another accountability thing *Desire to get pregnant...my surgeon said that once I was at a healthy weight for a couple of months that I could start trying; I actually have some other woman issues that might hinder this process and want to begin trying as soon as possible to see if I will need more help *Allowing myself to eat anything I want, but in moderation...I added carbs back in pretty early and am trying to lose the rest of my weight the way I plan to maintain, so I feel as "normal" as possible Sorry about the book, but I wanted to give you as clear of picture as possible regarding my decision making and thought processes. For all that I stated above, I think the band might be a good surgery for some, but I just decided it wasn't best for me. Please let me know if you have any further questions or just want to chat. I wish you luck with your decision! What a great way to start the new year. Dee Dee

December 13, 2009

1

First time in front of the class

This morning at Jazzercise the instructor announced to everyone that I would be trying out in Feb. to be an instructor and invited me to come up front to get a feel for how it would be. I was less than thrilled, feeling tired, bloated, and crampy, but she wouldn't take no for an answer. I'm glad I had the experience. It is different having to do all the routines in a different direction and having people watch you for the way the movements are supposed to be done (it made me a lot more conscious of how I moved and did not allow me to get sloppy). It also reaffirmed how much better shape I need to be in before auditions. There would have been no way that I could have done the routines AND cued the movements today with the headset microphone...I would have been breathing so hard they wouldn't have been able to hear any of the directions:-) The best part actually happened after class. Many people came up to talk with me and I got a lot of positive feedback on both my movements and my weight loss. One lady actually said I was easier to follow than the instructor (it's not true, our instructor is FABULOUS, but it was nice to be told anyway). My weight loss has definitely slowed to a crawl. This week's total weight loss is -1 lb. It was a hard week in the beginning and now I'm on my period, so I guess I am just grateful for any loss.

November 21, 2009

3

The scale moving in the right direction again

I KNOW that during my period I gain anywhere from 4-8 pounds, but that did not stop me from weighing myself. It was hard to see at first when I jumped up 2.5 lbs from one day to the next, but it was a good motivator to not comfort myself with bad foods. It made me more determined to follow the plan...I took in more protein than I ever have since surgery (still not the surgeon's goal, but better). Today, I was back down and even took off another 1.5 lbs. I now weigh 202. My first major goal was to be 199 lbs by October 12, my 30th birthday. I'm only 3 lbs away now. I'm thinking if I really work hard, I can be there by next Friday. But even if it takes longer, that's okay...the scale is again moving in the right direction. Next Tuesday marks 3 weeks post-op and I've read a lot about a stall at that point, so that's why I won't get too excited about getting out of the 200's soon, but I know it will happen one day. I'm just getting very excited!

August 21, 2009

1

Two Victories

This morning when I weighed myself I was at 187.5. This means I am down 50.5 pounds since beginning my pre-op diet in July AND officially am at my halfway mark. I have 49.5 pounds left to go to meet my goal. Over this past weekend, I did some shopping and fit into many size 14 pants, bought a size 12 dress, and a medium sweater. I went to Chico's and bought size 2 pants (the lady told me that is a normal size 12/14) and a size 1 (normal size 8/10) blazer that sort of fit, but I wouldn't spend that kind of money if it wasn't going to last for a while, so I bought it snug. Now obviously these must be brands that run pretty large, but it still made me feel really happy seeing that just 3 months ago I was wearing sizes 22/24 and couldn't shop in normal sections of stores.

September 29, 2009

1

Much Better Day

I had a physical this morning with my PCP. I saw him about two weeks before my surgery and briefly explained what I was having done and he hadn't seen me since. At the time he seemed a little skeptical, but was of course professional. Today I was shocked with how supportive he was. We talked for a long time and I told him the lab work I wanted for sure and that my surgeon wanted (vitamin D level was low below surgery) and he actually left for a few minutes to research what else he might want to order due to me having bariatric surgery. This was great because I was self-pay so if he didn't order everything I would have had to pay to get the additional labs done. Another great thing is that on their scale I weighed 164 lbs. I know it doesn't count because it's not the scale I weigh on all the time, but it was great to see that number fully clothed. The nurse who weighed me kept looking at my chart and then back to the scale and then finally I realized that she must be comparing my weight from the end of July (around 230 lbs) with this weight. I smiled and told her I had wls, she chuckled and said "oh." Then she told me how well I've done with it and asked questions about the procedure. I love my sleeve! Lastly, I decided to join the same gym as my husband as a way to do more things together. I only signed up for a month to see how much I actually am able to attend. Right now I can squeeze in a workout before tap class on Mondays, and Fridays after work, and Sundays. Every other day I'm pretty much booked up with Jazzercise although I might try to workout some days before going to class. We'll see.

November 19, 2009

2

I'm Sleeved!

It turned out to be a little more of an operation than originally planned. The surgeon told me that he found a hiatal hernia and had to deal with that as well. I'm still a little confused about exactly that was/is, but we will discuss it more at my first post-op next week. Yesterday was my first day home and I sort of took a turn for the worse. In the hospital I was up walking and talking to everyone, very happy and feeling great. Late in the morning they took me down for an upper GI, and I ended up puking and getting the shakes from the stuff they had me swallow before the barium. I was never able to do the barium because I was shaking and chattering too bad. Once back in my room, I started to feel a little better, but not as good as the night and morning before. I got the news that based on the pictures they were able to take, everything looked fine for me to begin clear liquids. Around 3:30 PM all the IV fluid was through me, I'd spoken with my surgeon, the hospital dietitian, and many others, and the nurse was ready to go over my discharge paperwork. This morning I definitely felt better than last night. Last evening I barely finished a 15 minute walk on the boardwalk. Today, I easily did 30. I'm still not getting much in myself and really need to work on that. Other than that, I'm trying to take my pain meds on schedule. I have an OnQ pump for pain relief support that I'll have to remove on Sunday afternoon. I started my vitamins today and think that might have helped me feel better.

August 7, 2009

1

No Scale...

Well, I guess I would have to call myself addicted to the scale. The last couple of nights I have been house/dog sitting for a friend and she doesn't have a scale. I have not been able to weigh myself since Saturday and have actually considered going to buy one at target up the road so I could weigh in tomorrow morning. This is absolutely ridiculous because it would not weigh me the same as mine at home, and really what does it matter, I obviously have scale issues:-) I really do need to have other things to focus on besides my weight. It's hard because I'm here alone with the dog and only had time to run a few errands and meet my husband for an early dinner before I needed to come over to take care of her. I now have the rest of the evening in front of me with no cable and my mind obsessing about if I gained or lost a pound overnight...it's a bit pathetic, but by writing this post I just managed to talk myself out of buying a new scale, so that's good.:ohmy:

November 23, 2009

1

4 Month Follow-up Appointment Today

I just got back from my follow-up appointment. The whole office was very excited to see the progress I've made over the last two months. After saying thank you for the compliments, I didn't know what else to say...it got to be a bit embarrassing and I kind of felt awkward. The surgeon thought my blood work looked pretty good. He's having me take a break from the Vit. D for a month and then start taking 5,000 IUI's every other day (that level was too high, in July it was only 18). He's just having me take 500 mg of vitamin B12 because those levels were high as well. He wasn't concerned at all about my low iron because the saturation looked fine. For my cholesterol, he said to watch my cheese intake (I pretty much add cheese to everything in order to up my protein). He did bring up my goal weight and basically said he'd like for me to shoot a little lower than just normal, he mentioned 22. We'll see, at 148 lbs I will have a bmi of 24.6, and at that point I know will feel like a success. I think I'll just know when I'm done and that will be that. At the end of the meeting, I asked him about getting pregnant. He basically said what I thought, I need to be at a healthy weight for 2-3 months and that is usually around 12 months out for most. I'm considering coming back to a low carb diet to speed up the weight loss and hopefully get to goal sooner. I was planning to start trying in June (around 10 months post-op), but it would be great if I could start even sooner :001_tongue:.

December 2, 2009

1

Over one big hurdle

My week of constipation has finally come to an end. I started taking Miralax (Monday or Tuesday?) and have really worked hard at upping my water intake and protein. I'm not sure what actually did it, maybe my body just decided that 7 days was plenty long. I don't really care, just super excited that it has ended. Now if only my body would decide it was time for the scale to start moving down again, but I know that will happen in it's own good time as well. I was actually a lot more anxious regarding the constipation than not losing weight...but now that I seem to be over that, I'll probably start fixating on the scale:-)

August 27, 2009

1

Failing

I am currently in a stall and IT'S ALL MY FAULT. Currently I am 4 months, one week out, and am pretty close to being at a normal bmi (my goal for now), but I'm just wondering if I'm ever going to make it. My mind knows what I need to do, but I'm just not doing it. The biggest problem is that I am now snacking, and not because I'm hungry, which has upped my daily calorie intake. I've also added more fruits and veggies (salads) into my diet, but unfortunately this has meant less protein. Each night of the past week I've had the best intention of starting the next day with a protein drink, but it just hasn't happened. I'm hoping by writing this down, I can recommit to my weight loss journey. This time of year (winter) has always been an emotional roller coaster for me, but it seems that this year, in particular, has been a lot more extreme "excitedness" and a lot more sadness. Lots of things seem to set me off in tears and then I try to pull myself out of it by focussing (obsessing) on some goal I'd like to accomplish, which excites me and gives me a purpose. The good news here is that my house has never been more organized, I actually spent 48 hours a couple weekends ago cleaning/completely emptying our sitting room, purchasing and putting together furniture and it looks great now! I guess all this rambling is to say that I'm not doing too well with my sleeve tool. I really do not want to fail and hope I can get my mind back into the game soon.

December 11, 2009

1

Each day gets better

I'm not sure if I'm still stalling with my weight because I have not weighed myself in two days. I will say that if I am, my weight must be shifting because I wore a skirt today that I couldn't zip at the beginning of my stall. I'm still learning how to eat in different situations. Yesterday I went to brunch and had scrambled eggs with cheese. It didn't go down very well, felt kind of stuck, but I kept taking bites and tried to chew better. I only ate about 4 bites but I felt overly stuffed for a couple of hours. I got the hiccups sort of (this has been happening when I eat too much), but felt better later in the day after I took a walk. Today I sort of returned to work. I am a teacher, but will not start this year until mid October because I am taking over for another teacher who will leave and not return once she has her baby. I'm going back to my old job and school, so I went in today for their first work day back. It was great to see everyone and I got a couple of compliments. There is another teacher whose mother passed away yesterday so I will be going in this week to set up her classroom and do what I can for her. Well, not much else happening right now. I'm just glad that I'm finding other things to focus on besides the scale. I was almost about to get depressed over the stall and then I remembered some fitness goals I wanted to accomplish and decided to start on those. I signed up for a two hour per week tap and jazz class that begins Sept. 10. I'm hoping my surgeon will release me for full exercise when I see him this week so I can start back to Jazzercise (haven't been in well over a year), it's been four weeks and I think I'm ready as long as I don't push myself too hard.

August 31, 2009

0

First Stall

Well, I'm now on day 5 of fluctuating between 202 and 202.5 lbs. I was sort of prepared for a stall, but it really does get old. I'm just trying to get in more protein and calories (I'm almost up to about 500-550 calories per day). I've started forcing myself to drink 1 protein shake a day and am getting in about 45 grams of protein per day. I'm also walking around 2 miles per day, but the last couple of walks have really taken a lot out of me, I was so tired and had to really slow down the second half of the walk. I called the surgeon's office today and spoke with the nurse (surgeon's on vacation) because this is also day 5 of not having a bowel movement. Her first question was about my liquid intake. I know that yesterday I got in 70 oz of water, but before probably only around 50-60 oz. She told me to take Miralax, although I did take it yesterday and today. I'm going to call back in two days if nothing has moved. I'm not in any kind of pain and just started feeling a little bloated today. So basically to get through this stall (and constipation) I'm just going to work very hard at following the program by upping my protein intake, my water intake, and walking further. I'm also going to try to start changing up and increasing my calories because I'm starting to get a little bored with my food decisions.

August 25, 2009

0

I'm on my way...

I had my consultation today (2nd surgeon) and have a surgery date scheduled for August 4. I'm supposed to immediately begin eating high protein, low carbohydrate foods/meals. I'm glad about this because the thing I am most nervous about is learning how to eat differently. I'll meet with the nutritionist on July 6, but I'm going to try to do my best up until that point. As I reviewed the paperwork from the doctor's office this afternoon, it really started to hit me that this new chapter of my life is really going to begin soon. I'm very excited and a bit nervous. I started therapy about a month ago to begin discussing some of my issues with food and I hope that the transition I'm about to make won't be as tough with the right supports in place.

June 25, 2009

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