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bringin it.

Entries in this blog

 

Some Odd, Yet Hopeful Changes....

That will happen affect being banded; - no more waking up in the middle of the night feeling sick to my stomach or having "a heavy tummy" because I made the wrong choices st dinner - no laying awake after going pee in the middle of the night, an able to fall back asleep because of Ty's sleep apnea and snoring   That's about it for now... Lol, it's 1am and Ty won't stop snoring.
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

0
 

Now It Feels Like Christmas Is Coming!

24 more days!     Now I have a good ole fashion Christmas countdown until my last two appointments. And I finally found a distraction, planning my wedding. And now sadly, my next week will be filled with doggy time. I have to get rid of my two dogs due to work and other reasons. Next saturday (the 9th) is the drop off date. BOO so I am going to cuddle as much as I can.
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

2
 

I Feel Like I'm In Limbo....

Even though I completed on of the steps that I needed to before my next appointment (requesting 2 years worth of medical records) it feels like this is going to be the longest month of my three month supervised diet. I just want it to be February 26th, but I know for sure that when that day finally rolls around, I'm going to be waiting for the next day. So much waiting to be healthy!!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

1
 

I Feel Addicted....

To thinking about lap band. I wish I could occupy my mind with something else, but for the most part I'm hooked. When working, whn Ivey out of breath, I just think about being banded. Everything banded.... All the time. I need a distraction.
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

5
 

Light At the End of the Tunnel...

is fast approaching. Today I had an appointment with my nutritionist as part of my supervised diet. It went pretty smoothly. We mostly talked about how I would need to take supplements to insure that I am getting all my vitamins and nutrients after surgery. And the rest of my appointment was spent talking about my wedding and my nutritionist wedding. I like her very much. I wish it was awkward to try to contact her to be a friend. We have so much in common. I also talked to the insurance coordinator about everything that I needed to do in the final month of my supervised diet so that I could be completely finished at my next appointment and ready to turn in my case to the insurance company as soon as possible. I need to get the last 2 years of my medical records faxed to the insurance coordinator. I should have done this last month because I switched insurances and now it might be difficult to get them from Group Health, because Group Health is terrible.
Complete a Pysch, questionnaire.
Have a Physch. evaluation done on the same day as my last appointment. (I'm slightly confused on this one... are they going to deny me if I'm to depressed or not depressed enough?)
One last nutrition appointment, on February 26. (I feel like making a count down, out of like construction paper. With the loops that make a chain. I'm just so excited to start my new life)
Tyler had his first appointment today. I'm excited that he has started. I just have this looming fear that I won't be approved and he will be. Waahh!! That would be terrible!   Anywho, I'm off to bed, I'm so tired today.   Happy losing everyone! Shelley
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

1
 

As I Sit...

on my couch with teeth whiten trays in and smelling the sweet smell of my tanning lotion left on my skin while typing with my new pretty clean manicure, I realize I spend a lot of time and money on trying to look good....to compensate for the fact that I am not skinny.   On Tuesday I'm going to be calling my Weight loss facility and then my insurance company to make sure of the next few things that need to get done before my last nutrition appointment which is on the 25th of Feb, so I hope to be able to be approved and banded in early March. It seems so far away.   So the reason why I am really writing this blog today.... something that I plan on starting to do again and from here on in. When I was in high school I used to eat in front of a full length mirror that was in the dining room. As I was able to see what i was putting into my mouth and how much of it was entering my body. I used to stop eating long before my plate was empty! and I'm going to start again.   Let me know what you think.
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

1
 

Just Ready For the Rest...

Of the week, and month, and the next two months to be over so that I can move on with the next part of my life. The last few days have felt to long. Starting my Zumba regimen today, excited about that. Not much after that.
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

0
 

It's Refreshing To See...

That its possible to live without food running your life. I am in a very veryy small town visiting family in Pennsyvania.....Bobtown, PA. Ya, go ahead and look that up on a map. Anyway, it's been a running joke in my family that if you need to loses weight, take a trip back home to Bobtown. Growing up and even in my younger adult years I never fully understood why this worked. See, the family that lives here, my aunt and uncle and my pap pap and a few other random older relatives, and all my cousins, they are all skinny, and fit, and beautiful. They have always been like this. They are very active and play sports through college and maintain a good workout schedule. THEY RARELY EAT! This is no exaggeration.... I have been here for over 48 hours, during the parts of the days where if I was at home I would have eaten probably 11ish times (breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, dessert) and since being here, I have eaten 4 times. FOUR. When I was younger, I used to think that it was because they couldn't afford food like my parents. (This is a very poor old mining town, just like the little towns that surround it) and that made sense to me.... But now, as I visit them during the begining of my lap band journey, after learning the things that I have learned and after seeing my nutritionist amd practicing the skills I'll need after surgery, I realize that my family here in Bobtown have had it right the whole time. It wasnt necessarily because the didn't have the financial means to eat like I always have while growing up and now (to much and terrible food)... It's because they EAT TO SURVIVE not survive to eat. Food isn't a priority, it isn't an emotnal blanket, it isn't a pass time here. They don't keep massive amounts of food in the house because its unneeded. And that is the way that I need to start living.  
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

1
 

A Stressful Beginning To the New Year....

Back to work...boo Still dealing with the switching of our insurances (Did you know they charge to print out your OWN medical record??) My grandpa that lives across the country is dying...triple boo Dealing with trying to figure out when to fly to PA to deal with that, but last night I remembered that Tyler and I have an emergency savings account that we have a little money from every paycheck go to and that was a huge relief! Finding out I won't have to worry about how to pay for my ticket and ect. Everyone needs a secret savings account that you put in just a little bit, it adds up and you forget about it and then Bam! You have money.   My next appointment is at the end of the month. I need to work harder on meeting my goals. I have been eating on a smaller plate, which is still weird, such a mind game.   Good luck everyone and have a great weekend!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

1
 

Almost the End of the First....

I'm lying in bed with 31 minutes left of the first of the new year. I'm sad because I am going back to work tomorrow and that's no fun for anyone. So for my new year's resolutions... They may not seem big to most, but they are mine and difficult for me to hold; 1) to stop biting my finger nails and fingers... I want to be a lady with nails that can be painted. 2) to do the 5 dollar bill saving challenge. Whenever I get a 5 dollar bill for change I plan on putting it in my piggie bank instead of spending it. Just 5 dollar bills. 3) to be banded and starting my journey in March.   I have already had 2 of my 4 nutritionist appointments. My last appointment is on Feb. 26 and hopefully everything will be in line for me to get approved and banded shortly after that. Ty says he will be starting his supervised diet soon, he just wanted to give me a bit of a jump start. Well I'm off to bed. Good night and good luck everyone!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

2
 

I Feel Like I Fell Off The Grid

I haven't posted in a hot minute, but I have a good reason for that. I have been TDY in Everett for the last week on 12 hour days. It takes a lot of you... and week has kinda blurred together. But I go home on Monday (tomorrow). Which I'm pretty happy about. Ty is also here TDY too and on the same schedule and that adds to the stress and draining feeling. Don't get me wrong, I love that boy, but it's a lot to be around eachother at every waking moment.   So, on Thursday, November 28th, I started my supervised diet, so hopefully surgery will happen in the begining of March. So right now my goal for the month is to start eating more protien at breakfast and to start getting 30 minutes of excerise 2 days a week. It's all about small changes to make a big lifestyle change. My next appointment is Decmeber 20th.   I got my camera! So stay tuned for my vlog! I'll let ya know!   Time for bed, work in the morning! Yippy.   Night!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

0
 

My List...

Of things I want to be able to do on and after my weightloss journey. To sky dive (weight limit is 200lbs for my height)
Be able to comfortably fit in an economy airline seat
Be able to ride roller coasts with a "no doubt" mind set that I will fit
Start training for a triatholon
Be back to my high school jean size of 11 and medium top
Learn to play violin (not really weightloss related... but whatev, I want to learn)
Be able to wear high heels longer than 3 hours with out my feet hurting from 270+lbs crushin my tooties
Not have to try on 20 dresses to find 1 that looks ok to wear
Be able to walk up the dry-dock stairs at work with out feeling like I'm dying (literally...my leg feel like they're going to fall off and my heart feels like it's going to explode)
Not having to crop pictures anymore
No more having to retake pictures 20 times to find one where I don't look huge
  I know I'll come up with more....
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

5
 

I Feel Better After...

Some movies, a facial mask...a face wash...a face steam with peppermint...and then alcohol swabbed onto my face. We shall see if this is the perfect combination treatment or if this will irritate my skin further.   ETA of my gorgeous camera is the 29th... a day after my first appointment. So I am planning on recording my first vlog then! I'm so excited to document everything! Hopefully my skin is cleared up by then :wub:   It's pretty late (for me) so I'm off to bed. Night!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

3
 

Ugh... I Can't Wait Until....

I can feel good enough about myself... even when something isn't going well. I was invited to go out with some friends and I went to go shower to get ready and after looking in the mirror and staring at my aweful skin (I just went off my birth control and I have broken out like a teenager) so I made up some fib to get out of going out so that I could do a face mask and wallow in my self pitty. I'm normally a confident girl... but that's normally because I have flawless skin that I can rock with awesome eye make up... that over powers my body size. But not tonight. I don't think I have enough makeup or skill to cover up the mess that is my face. So tv, face mask and a fire for me. Cleaning tomorrow and santa on Sunday.
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

3
 

A Quick Blip Before Bed

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving! I sure did! It was a little out of my ordinary, but a wonderful holiday and a day off from work. Woke up and watched a bit of tv, waiting for Ty to wake up. Then we had breakfast and went and saw an early movie. We saw Red Dawn.... it was fantastic!!! I couldn't believe it! Then we drove back to Ty's hotel and when we got there we realized we had nothing to do and nothing was really open for us to do anything... so we decided to see another movie! We had lunch then headed back to the theater... to see... Pitch Perfect. Again! Another hit! It was awesome! Then after the movie we laid around the hotel for a bit, then decided to go see my family for a bit and maybe get a free dinner out of it... so we drove over to Seattle and saw a small bit of my family. Dinner was awesome and then we played a few games. I was able to tell my mom that I am about to start my Lap-Band journey, and she is pretty excited for me. Then I said goodbye to Ty (since he is TDY in Everett) and I went and barely caught the ferry home. And now, I am ready for bed and ready to get tomorrow at work out of my way... lol we shall see if I have to work on Saturday. I just want it to be Wednesday soooo bad!!   Well, have a great night everyone!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

0
 

And The Wheels Are A Turnin!!

So I have set up the first 4 appointments needed to start everything! And I'm so happy about it!   1st appointment: Novemeber 28th (nutritionist) 2nd appointment: Novemeber 30th (doctor for recommendation letter) 3rd appointment: Decemeber 20th (nutritionist <--- this one is tentative because of work, but I'm surveillance be able to go) 4th appointment: January 25th (nutritionist)   I may have another appointment after that, but I won't know until my first appointment on Wednesday, I have already seen this nutritionist, but it was in July and the person I was talking to to make all these appointments wasn't able to tell me if it would count. I hope it does. If it were to count then I could possibly be banded at the end of February, if not.... Then march. Which I'm ok with, because this is all happening about a month and a half faster than I though it would happen. Eeep!   Well I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving!      
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

0
 

And My Night Keeps On Getting Better!!

Even though Ty is staying 2 hours away from me, he couldn't have been a better fiance' than today! After I called him with our amazing news about being able to start the process, he went and bought my Christmas present so I could have it early! A brand new Canon camera!! So that I can take photos of my journey and start recording a continuous vlog of everything! I'm soooo happy today! Nothing could bring me down! (Except this sad episode of Catfish ) I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving eve!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

1
 

Oh My Gosh!! Such Great News!

I found out that I can start my process now!! I can start the 3 month supervisied diet now! And it will still count when I actually get the new insurance! I'm so happy!! So it's just less time until I get banded!!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

5
 

A New Day Has Come....

It's kinda cheesy, but I kinda set myself up for success this morning. I set my alarm so that it would play "A New Day Has Come" By:Celine Dion. I feel like it's just the good juju that I'm going need to undo yesterday.   TODAY is the day that I change health insurances! Then I just have to wait until January. Which is fine since I've already waited 6 months already.   So now I'm off to work. Easy day today. Then just work tomorrow, then Thursday off. So really an easy week.   Have a great day everyone!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

1
 

When It Rains... It Pours.... Literally.

I live in the great state of Washington, the state of evergreen trees, Starbucks, Vampires and Native American Werewolves. I also live in a state that rains so much you don't have to refresh your dog's outside waterbowl during the fall/winter/spring. It rained so much last week that some how my chimney got clogged with wet soot. It rained so much last night that my roof couldn't handle life anymore and crapped out and started leaking into my ceiling and about 3 inches away from my 70 flat screen. Chimney sweep came today. Fireplace good. Ty had to come home early from work and grab a friend to tarp the roof. That lasted all of an hour before it got so windy that the cinderblocks that were holding the tarp down started sliding off the roof in a death fall. One of them crashed onto a fish tank that was out side to be cleaned and sold. Not anymore... now there are shards of glass in the grass. While listening to the cinderblocks side across my roof in a sound that can only be compared to a giant sledding down my roof, I ran out to the livingroom with a book and my iPhone to see what it was. I stepped in dog pee because my dumb mutt dogs refuse to go to the bathroom outside because it's wet. So in a fit of rage I slammed down my book which also included my phone. I'm not a weak person... I threw it with some force. And well.... long story short, I broke my phone.I call Ty (who went with his friend to the driving range) and inform him of the cinderblock storm that is rainging around our house.... he tells me it's not a big deal. BAAAAHHHGGGG!! I then was contacted by someone at work to inform me that I will be sent on a tdy trip for a few months. So I go look for my government credit card... can't find it. ANYWHERE. So I call and cancel it and order a new one that will be expidited and be here by tomorrow afternoon. Call work back and tell them.... well that isn't good enough. The trip is emergant and I was to be leaving tomorrow. So now they go to the next person on the list... who might that be? Ty. So now he is leaving tomorrow on MY trip because I am so unorganized I can't handle life. But no worries, work said there is a possibility that I could be going on the trip, just on the 3rd of December. Which is fine. I just can't handle today.... and it's not even 1:30 yet.
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

6
 

It's Gonna Be A Good Day...

Found my engagement ring this morning!!!! Right where it was supposed to be.... weird, but so happy that that is over. Scary feeling! So now I going to clean my house, then wait until 4 so that I can see the new Twilight, then go to bed. Then tomorrow I'm going to make my last few calls to figure out this insurance thing and then.... COMMIT! I can feel it! less than 6 months and I KNOW that I'm going to be banded!! Now to just start working on changing a few habits to get ahead of the game. Like eating slower and not drinking while eating. those are going to be two hard habits to break. If anyone has any advice on how to start to break these habits go ahead and let me know!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

2
 

It Feels More Real Than Ever Now....

I am still doing the research on switching insurance. But I found out that the surgeon and facility that we orginially went to is accepted by the new insurance. It is the most amazing feeling!!   My only problem in life right now?? I miss placed my engagement ring... I need to find that thing!!
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

1
 

Again... It's Been Awhile :/

It's been a while since I blogged anything and I think that is becasue I kinda gave up on the idea of getting banded. I just found out this morning that BCBS covers the surgery! So I will be switching proptly! And Next year re-starting my journey of getting banded, because I have been trying things that keep failing. It feels good again to be hopeful. We shall see. HAve a great day everyone.
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

2
 

It Has Been 3 Months Since I Last Posted...

And it saddens me so. I wish that I could say that things are going the way they should be and that I have been banded, but I haven't and it still looks like I'm going to have to wait a year or more. And that isn't a good thing. I have given up in a sense. I have gained weight and I can't seem to get modivated to do anything about it in the mean time. I need to start working out to slowly start taking off the weight so that I don't reach 300lbs. I just don't know how it got so bad. I wish that my insurance covered the surgery or at least helped out. Ty doesn't seem to care, and that makes me think that he doesn't care if it happens or not, which makes me more depressed about the whole situation. I wish we could find a co-signer to help with the CareCredit but I guess I will just have to wait.   Other news though... which is great news... I'm ENGAGED! Ty proposed to me about a month and a half ago while I was visiting him in San Diego. Super excited. We won't be married though for a few years, because I want to lose weight before hand.   Until next time.   Shel   *I guess I'll have to fake it 'til I make it*
Shelleymb

Shelleymb

5

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