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Lauracat's Blog

A blog by Lauracat

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About this blog

just about my life with the band

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Goal Setting

One of the things i am working on is setting goals that make sence for me. Thinking about things diffently So i put down my goals and I was told to think of it like this what can i do today what can i do in two week what can i do in a mouth So for example I want to be a size 10 yes 10 I am a 14. 1. write down everythin i eat and drink 2. try and adovid head hunger cravings 3. reach for support make sure i go to all my OA meeting and Weight watchers no matter what. Goal 2 was to become a zumba instruter 1. Get cerferfied - I did this today 2. Work on getting my club to let me sub 3. Woek on my zumba danceing rutines so i can do them no matter what Goal 3 Get skinny jeans 1. Look for skinny jeans in size 14 with out makeing my self feel bad about how i look 2. watch what i eat better by writing it all down 3. make sure i go to the gym to all my work out with out skipping Goal 4 work on Abs 1. Go to abs class 2. Get new trainer who will help me with goal 3. Not stopping just becuse i am being lazy and feeling my abs Goal 5 sround my self with pepole who are supportive 1. Goal one get rid of old trainer who will not change and was never supportive of me undergoing WLS to one who will work with me and understand how my body is changing and will be supportive of this and not say i should have tryed anything else. - ( I think i done this as I have found someone I love and told the old one it time to leave just have to get paper work done to switch over) 2. Make sure that pepole who know are not jellous of my succcess and relizese how hard i worked to get were i am and How hard i must work to stay were i am 3, Weed out pepole who call me a cheet or other names ( be more fussy who i tell) So thats my goal setting for today

July 28, 2012

1

Another Fill

Well it been 3 weeks since my unfill so it time to get my fuild back. While i not gained i not relly lost i gone up and down about 2 lbs. I also talked to my nurtionist kate. When ever i am not feeling great nurtionly she the one to go to. we talked alot about diffent types of hunger and what to do for them. I talked about how i get dizzy when i do not eat enough and work out hard she said thats real hunger thats your body telling you need more. She said think of it like this when you eat if you were to place a plate of brorcklie in front of you would you eat that if the answer is yes then thats hungery nunger you body sending you the message. If the answer is no then thats head hunger. We also talked about things to do for head hunger such as keep busy keep hands busy and mind busy. My Dr Fellow who saved the band Dr Odokey she I look great. She said it nice to she you move and be happy and prerky. We talked alot about trying to keep kidney infections away so this dose not happen again. I talked to another Dr about it that day too so everyone on the same page as far as my kidney go. I get another fill in september. So far i not relly felt anything with this fill he put two cc in my band I thinking it could take some more time. The best part was he found my port on the frist shot no Flor need for him to find my port. His fellow and I laughed. He also hides the nedale so i have no idea how huge it is I told her thats makes it easyer on me. I saw her in the elvator going to the pre-op meeting and she said Hay did Dr jones ask you to speak you should. I said no I going to support group she like yea come down after and tell your story. I feel it too soon to do that pluse i don't want to scar everyone with my story.

July 27, 2012

0

Head Hunger

There nothing worst the getting unfilled on Juily 4 So i thought. Nothing worst then have my dr fellow stick me four times with a neadle and then say i just did not place this port and can't feel the edges so it very hard. I thought have an florcepy to be unbanded was band then haveing endocpepy to be fixed was alsp bad. But now I am stuck in hunger land. I am back of Lquids for the next week and half but who counting. The worst part of the huger is not the hunger i feel. It the head hunger the hunger to eat something in my head. It became a thought of mine at all times I see food ad on TV and then i want that. I drive by a place and can smell the food and want that. I made a list of all the food i going to eat once i am better enough to not be on lquids. I know it all in my head and this is the worst part. It like when i did pre opt deit all i would dream about food roast chicken I just wish i had an easyer time. I guess it good that I was able to save my band but God i would kill for an egg roll just one bit. I find that i can't do normal stuff becuse i am just too tempted right now to do the worng thing.

July 14, 2012

2

A Oneserst Party

for every body who ever been over 200 lbs you know what it feels like when you brake the mark and for the fritst time see the big 1 on the scale. Well it happend to me when i was so sick i did not even care. But now that i am feeling alot better i want to do something to cellbrate as this is huge!!!!!!! I gone from a 24 to a 14 I goe form a 44 dobble d to a 40 d or a 38 depending on the bar. , So i was told to cellbrate millsotones along the way. At 20 lbs i got a pair of shoes at 30 lbs i got some cloths becuse mine were falling off at 35 i did a mani pettti and now were ready for the big one 45 the oneseter land. I want to thow a party but how dose some one party with out food. Well after talking it over today with my Zumba teacher we came up with the Idea a zumba party yes no food but plenty of zumba and just a good time. I don't have a date yet as I have to wrok it out but I think this is a great way to cellbrate onester land.

July 9, 2012

3

There Is No I In Team

Being form boston area i am huge base ball fan and i love the red sox even when they stink like this year. But in 2004 when the redsox were down they pulled them self toghter and they landed up not only winning the play off agaist the Yankees but the worlld sezies. Huge as they had not won in over 50 years, So what dose this have to do with my Lapband. Well more then you think. You see my lap band is the red soxs some times you get down and you need to work with your team to pull you back up. It knowing you can trust that team when things look bad is what matters So who is my team Well I am the Leader of the team - Jason Vertic of the red sox ( he was the team caption) Then there are my support members My surgon - Dr Jones and his fellow who is my new favorit dr Dr Odsky - they call the shots there there like the pitcher thow thow the balls ect in this case fill and unfill the port) Nurtionisht - Michelle and Kate - they are like Big pappi the teach us how to eat so we can hit the home run My Traine Dave r and My exsizese teachers Roberta, Michelle, and Evelynn - they like the out feilder they porovie do the feilding and make me move My family and Freinds- There my fan the root for me for thick and thin Now why am i scard to uses my team like meany of you I was scard to email nurtion with my long winnyey email about lquids for 3 weeks becuse i was embrassed that i was unfilled and did not succed but then i rember something michelle she my nurtionist Laura win lose or draw we be here for you all you need to do is email we can't help if we do not know whats going on. So i will be writeing that long winney email as i know they will be there for me beucse there part of my team and when i uses the team i can win the world sezies just like the 2004 boston red sox

July 8, 2012

0

One Great Nurse One Great Dr One Very Scary Emenencey

So i going to start off with i am sorry about my spelling i can not help it i have dylsixia and i would love to spell better for years when pepole would say things about it i woulld slove it by eating large amountsto make my self feel better abouut it beat my self up call my self names and since i said i was trying to tun over a new leaf about life and i not going to do any of the above any more knowing that it took me to being bigger make poor chocies and feel badly about my self and eat more. So that being said I am going to try just telling the turth about it. So with that being said I last left off with dr Stupid. Then that night i went to the ER at the er they were going to give me a percrpiton and let me go but we had trubble finding it and since they called around too they could not find it they did IV antibotics and since they were doig IV antibotics and then 500 cc of fuild and some anti nauness medication and some pain meds. This go me though the next day but they also said don;t come back call your PCP if you can not keep anything down. The next day it was 90 out but i was shivering wereing long sleaves and swetter winter socks and winter shoes.and called the DR they said go back to the hospital that told me not to come back I said no it did not work like that I did not want to just go and be relsed and they did not want me to come back. So i made an apppointment to go there office . After two hours and two diffent floors they saw me. I had a fever of 101.9 and i wight 199 I would have cryed if i was not so dizzy and naunses and felling like i wanted to die. the dr takes one look at me and said you need to be in a hospital I said i would not go back to were i went last night She said were did you have your band done. I said the Great dr jones did it at Beth Israeral in boston, She said well i think you need to go back there. I said okay I had asked my mother for a ride and she gave me a long lecture about how we would wait for ever and ever and i made a mistake and how she was so mad at me. I said look All i want is a ride don't even park or come in I relly don't need you, She said Laurea I am your mother I will wait one hour then i going to leave I said Fine just leave I don't want you. With in 15 min i was taken back with in 15 mins. The frist thing the dr said to me if i can get you feeling better do you want to go home.I said thats what happend yesterday the dr said good point i don't want you to come back tommorow worst I am admitting you. Iv fuild started they gave me a breathing treatment becuse i was weezing and then pain meds and nusness meds and with in a few hours i was taken up to Farr 2. were the dr comes and and said You got quite an infection going were growing it out but we going to give you big gun aantibotics and hope we kill it and tweek it as we need to. The next day I tell her i am haveing stucknenss in my chest hard to explan stuck to a skinny dr who has no idea about lap band. I we talk about my other symotoms thowing up nunesouss The day was full of test x-ray of my tummy and ekg times two and tons of blood and just feeling bad lots and lots of iv fuilds. That night my 3-11 nurse was named Kate she comes in around 7 with pepicd for me to chew and some water. We get talking about my band. And why i did it. I explaned i have walking up stairs i was out of breath i had high blood presser and was taken 4 diffent meds for acid reflex was one point away from being debitic had sleep apena. I said it took alot of planing. We talked how it had changed my life and 43 lbs . I tryed to take my pecid and i thow it up. Kate said Laura i want to see somthing she just take a sip of water for me. I said okay I did and up it came. She had been watching me vomit up white stuff all day. She looked at my vomit bucket that had become my best freinnd. She said Do you have anything in that band. I said yes i said stupid dr only gave me one CC i can get what ever i want thought this thing till i got sick. She said Laura I think you band is too tight . No way I don't want to lose my fill. She said talk to your dr about it The next morning my Dr comes in and I tell her what Kate said and the Dr said I know nothing about lap band. I said of course you don't skinny pepole don't need lap bands. She smiled and said Hay five pound on me is worth then it is you. and she said I hate to brake it to you but you don't look too fat your self. I said I was a tub 43 lbs ago. She then said I going to concelt with the GI i team. with in 30 mins i get a Knock on my door. We start talking about my symotoms. I said you know how when you eat bread and it back up and you get stuck or you eat too much i said it like that but all the time I said i can't evne get water though. This is Juily frist. He the frist one to get what stuck feels like. I said I loved the band we talked about all the things I could get though he lauged and i said but some things there just no way and I said those are the things I know cause pain and I hate that and avoid like the pleag he said hay now this is not see how much you can stuff though this thing. i said it was about expermenting and finding what was going to work for you. In walks Dr Odesky My new hero and one of the best dr and fellow every were. She said I am dr Jones fellow I said Great get out. She said what wrong I said Dr Jones last fellow sucked he yelled at me and He hated me and I was not found of him and now i not going to be found of you, She said aww Laura Dr jones tell us about you. I make you a promice i will not yell at you and If you do not like me then you can kick me out okay. I said okay. We start talking about what i was felling she knew my story all the date and every thing. Then she examns me, She then calls dr Jones this is the 4th of Juily. I said I can't belive you called him on the 4th of Juily he going to yell at me and You. She said Na if he get mad I promice you it will be just at me not you. No one going to yell at you we all just going to help you. We talk about what to do I we going to try to unfill my port right there in my room. She said she was having trubble feeling my prort edges so was nevous about the whole thing. In walks my nurse with this bord thing and said the bed needs to be harder to unfill your port. she tryed to get my port 4 times. I start screaming at the fouth time the other fellow is makeing me laugh he looks at him and said Stop makeing her laugh when i am sticking large neadles in her. So we gave up she said look I could get it under florocepy no problem but it the fouth i not sure there do it. We could just wait for dr jones tommrow. I said yea She said well i need an xray any ways so i talk to them . I down to xray and I get a chest x-ray everything looks okay but hard to tell if there prolaps but it looks okay. so then I see her in this x-ray apron thing she said Okay were going to unfill that port this time. I said you promice me you can do it. I never done one under floro before but yes i done loss of port it not a problem. Not as meny as dr jones he dose 100 's a week but yes I done more than one you be fine I promice you I know just what to do we get it done trust me okay. I said Okay. we then do Floro that is complated by i can not lay flat on my back due to kidney pain and she gets it from the side and get out all the fuild I sit up and the frist thing i notice is i can sollow my own sliva again and that all what was sitting on top of my band gone then. She said lets give it about 2 hours and then you can have water again she said just get used to being able to sollow your own stuff again. 2 hours latter she comes up to my room lets go for stage one she said how do you feel i said it like my presser is gone completly thank you and i not thown up my anything in two hours I have no problem with stage one expect i not a big water fan I like it flavored. Next morning they said Okay lets go for stage two problem is my reflex is back it start buruping up stuff. They said stop stage two and lets go back to one just long enough so we get a sollow study. A few hours latter i get my sollow study the radigigist said nothing to me and said your hear soon. I thought it was funny since before they just said looks good. With in a half hour dr Odskey comes not walking but running into my room i drinking my water that she said I had to stop right then. i was like no you said i can have stage one I am okay. She said No not any more your back on 0. Just make sure your on fuild and we need to make up your mind about something i going to give you 10 mins to make up your mnd okay . You have prolaps thats when the stumic moves up into the band she like we already emptey your band so thats good but I need to know how you want to preceed so i can make the argements right now. Option 1 do an endpepocey and try and save the band and we try and get it to move out. Opoin two lose the band I call the dr on call about loseing it and we can get you into an or tonight but till then Nothing more by mouth nothing not even water. . We talk about it we desied endoscpey was the way to go.. The nurse comes in and ups my fuilds too 150 an hour from 75 since i am now NPO. we start talking At this time it kate it 3- pm and it is again I told her i was nevous about eveything and that my ephoousss was so sore. She said Yea she under stood everything would be fine in a few hours eveything would be done i be back to stage 2 before i knew All day my roommate was nuts too she was an old rushin lady who they had this alrm on every time she get up and it happend all day but she became better as the day went on but my god it was annying. She truned out to be like a little grandma. With in 2 hours i was taken down to endopopey and sadated and prolaps fixed. Dr Odesky held my hand the whole way up to the floor she also made sure that i was postioned on my left side she said rember side becuse she rembered that i had back pain. She also waited till i was less doped up by my bed side she said i fixed it nothing by mouth till latter then stage 1 for a few hours then 2 again till morning okay. I guess my roomate was worried she said she going to be okay. She like yes she had sugery she needs to rest you need to be quite okay so she can rest. with in a few hours i was ready to go up and walking drinking till i got lose bowl movents from hell spent most of the night in pain and cramping but dr odseky came up and made sure i be okay By the next day Dr jones came back to cheek one me he said Laura I alway love you play by all the rules and you still buck the systum. He said how much have you lost now i said about 43 lbs. He said well your on lquid for the next 3 week i expect to see 20 more off he said you be skinny by then. I laughed and said and tryed to play lets make a deal for 1 and 1/2 weeks He said no 3 weeks I said i give you two her said I give you 3. I said your mean he said look your ephougous is very sollown and enfalmed it going to take some time for the pain to go away anyways as well as the swelling and i want to make sure you relly need that fill and were going slowly He like you have no idea how lucky you are. I said by the way Dr odeskey she a much better felllow then the last guy. He laughed and said yea she pretty found of you too now get back to being better will you He like your going to have to tell Dr odseky about the thing you do body what ever that you keep trying to drag me to, I said Body pump and your just scard i kick your butt at it and I can lift more then you can. He laughed he said you can also tell her how at two weeks you con me into letting you do it again I said yea by 3 weeks i was at abs class i just did not tell you I figered since you gave me the okay for body pump why not. He like i see you in 3 full weeks be good stay out of trobble and get better for god sake no more kidney infections and vomiting so hard. my nutty room mate truned out to be a sweet old lady once they got her meds readjusted. She keeped trying to feed me and i had to say no alot. I had my nurse tell her i can't eat and showed her my protine drink and said this is her food. I so wanted the french frises she was eating too. It was funny i said to her CNA i want food so baddy I would kill to be able to chew. She said how long are you going to go with out eating I said i am on a full lquid deit for 3 weeks then i can go get a fill have 2 more days of lquid 3 days of Mushy and then real food. So lquid it is I just have to live with it and be thankful that all my vomiting did not to more damage then it did. Things i am thankful for my family my the great nurse and fellow my own bed good antibotics and the fact i can sollow my own spit and good pain meds. So 3 weeks of the lquid deit is is. then i can be refilled lucky i still have my band and i am very sore in my kidneys and my ephougous but plan to be better so

July 7, 2012

0

Dear Dr Stupid

Dr Dr Stupid i am glad you have never had anyone with a lap band before come into your office. I know i have a UTI i glad that you could not even do a stupid dip stuck test to show that i have a UTI. I am dizzy and vomiting That would mean that i am probley dehiraded. I am glad you think it funny to precribe medison i can not take with my band. I do not were a med alret bracelt that said no NIsads for no reson so telling me to take advill was stupid, Teling me to wait for monday to talk to my PCP is even more stupid. I glad you do not belive in the lap band thanks for telling me that over and over but I wonder were you got you MD if you can not even rightly treat a simple UTI right. Next time i save my self the money and just wait till monday since thats what i will have to do anyways Singed a person who belives in her band becuse she lost 40 lbs by useing it and yes it was worth it. What was not worth it was seeing you becuse your an stupid person who can't even treat a simple UTI/ Kideny infection right

July 1, 2012

1

Ugg

welll it was bound to happen soner or latter. I seem to have hit the Palto i been 209 for now over 2 weeks I was 208.6 then gained and am back to 209. I am eating well expect fot my ice coffiee thing that i need to have with my skim milk and 4 spenda i think coffeee is a fuild or should be count tords it. I guess i going to have to suck it up and make the call asking for another fil. I am hungery at all time it like i can't get enough food. I can eat well over 2 cups and eat snacks though out the day. I am trying to make them heathy snacks. The big thing for me will be this comming weekend and Juily 4th. The twins brithday. We are having a party for them at a spray park / petting farm they are both so excited about it. I have order the cake and every knows i have a weekness and a foundness for cake once i get one bit before i know it i have eaten the whole cake this is why we can't have it in are house. We are having are anunal Juily 4th BBQ for familty. This dose not worry me as much as the cake thing again I have order a second cake this one going to be a real show stopper so i not sure i going to want to cut into it. along with cake come ice cream i have bought my self some ice cream that it low fat lactose free suger free it okay not the same. good new i have found i can fit into banna repblic i love there stuff never went in there now that i fit i can get stuff there. I also gone form a 44 DD to a 40 D that four inches off my back wow.

June 27, 2012

1

Doing Something About It

I had my frist fill an i am in what they call bandester hell. I can eat what everi want i never vomit any more and i can get it all down i have no resrtion with my 1 CC fill to make it worst i can't get another fill untill september. So i am going to do something about it. I could wine and complan that i have nothing i went though a sugery for nothing i am hurgery and can eat what ever i want. I guess i just did that Or i could say Okay it time to do something about it you lost 30lb and maybe you can do something with nothing. So i did something drastic i joined weight watchers again. yes I did same again I done weight watchers meny times before i quit each and every time. But this time I need to do it or i be back were i started sugery or no sugery. If the band can only help me a little and at this point nothing then maybe i can do it with extra help

June 18, 2012

1

I Am Starving

OMG i never been this hungry . I had my frist fill one cc in my 10 cc band he said see you in September do 3 days of lquids 3 days of mushies yesterday i did notice that i could not drink my whole protine shake but then by this afternoon i was so hurgy. I thought my pre opt diet was bad the only way i can stop my self is by brushing my teeth but i am starving everything going down the same as before only thing is i am back on the liquid diet. Will this get better i fell like there is nothing in my band well there is only one cc I think i may have to start the mushies a day early as i just can't live like this, I have a head acke and it not dehydration as i have had all my fuilds no problem i had 3 litters of fuild it something else like lack of food I think i need more fill would it be too soon for me to say that this fill is not enough this can't be what the green feels like.

June 15, 2012

0

My Frist Fill

down 30 lbs since surgery The dr asked me what i could eat I told him i could eat what ever i wanted but was eating about a 1/2 a cup 5 or 6 times a day and was hungry. He said he wanted to start off with a small fill 1 cc in my 10 cc band He gave me some water after he was done and told me to drink it fast, I thought this was funny since in the hospital he was telling me to drink slow since i puked right up on him as soon as i got to protine shake, I laughed and said to him your telling me to drink fast last time you know what happened he laughed and said good point i be on the other side of the room, I drank it nothing happend, I had my nurtion vist who taught us how to live the rest of our lives. She said saying your never going to eat bad food again is silly you just need to be prepared for the times it dose happen. She said no more protine shakes I said I relly liked them in the morning they fast easy tast good and filling and i add stuff to mine, She said okay. I have to go back to lquids for 3 days then mushies for 3 days then it onto the rest of my life, Next fill wil be september I had some problem when i drink too much protine shake i vomit up alot i thinking this may just take some time i can drink water fine and i had some apple saus as a snack no problem It just the huge protine shakes i make so i need to learn my limit

June 14, 2012

2

7 Weeks

7 weeks ago today i had Zoey ( my band) put in. Zoey can be a princess when she wants if i glup to fast I have nothing in zoey so Tomrow zoey gets her frist adjement ( fill) I hit a little palto with weight so i am hopeing that a fill might help. Things i am having trobble with are still the same not eating when i am stressed So far i have only cheeted tiwce one on week two i was able to eat some bread then on week 5 i had one pringle chip but it got stuck so i had to thow the rest of my prized chips in the transh. I am excited about tommorow and getting my fill

June 13, 2012

0

Yes

it seems to be the question evey ones asking if i only knew how hard it would be would i do it all over again ?The answer is yes i would I have been strugling with my weight watching it creap up and i felt out of control i did not know what to do. The band is control even with the complations i had i stil do it all over again. Knowintg how much my life would have to change i still do it all over again, Life is about living it hard to live when you spend so much time on the side lines becuse you just can't. I stil need to work out some things like slowing down when i eat or drink I put an egg timmer on for 20 mins thats how long it should take me to eat, I still need to work out copeing ways as now the eating thing that i cused to cope is not going to work. But Yes I would do it all over again even knowing all i know now I do not regreat my getting banded I am very thankful to Dr Jones for doing my band and being my chearleader when i coulld not. I lost about 27 lbs almost 30 in the 5 weeks i have had my band, I work at it evey day thats how i succced I write evey thing down all the info in a speical joual and it makes me set a goal for the next day so i know just what i did an i can be honset with my self. This was not a quick fix it very hard and i would do it all over again

May 28, 2012

0

Fat Slob

my mother desied i should not go shopping and told me she saved things from when i was a 12 i not a 12 yet. When i was a 12 i was 120 lbs i had 6 mouths of conrinc vommiting i thow up about 3 times a day due to a conic apdexicess it like have your apedeix inflamed for six mouth i could not eat i barly drank yes i was a 12 and i did gain it all back pluse. So she made me tryed them on and then she said well you did this to your self your just a fat slob. I wanted to eat so bad as that what i knonw but i am writing it down so i rember what she did . I hate pepole who want to hurt you and not help you i think it time to get rid of her and her negive ways she had no right to bring that stuff over and say hateful things. I am sorry if this sounds like a whine and complain but i just need to get this off my chest before i handle this the wrong way with my good old freind red velet cupcake and ice cream and chips

May 27, 2012

6

What I Can Do Now

I lost about 27 lbs since i started i was working out with my tainer today and we were doing some things we have not done in along time and they were so much easyer he said you relly changed in the last mouth. He said right before sugery you could not do these things and now look at you. I said yea 25 lbs off my kneese hurt so much less. I said my hip pain is so much less. I used to feel my kneese going up the stairs. I can walk up stairs with out stopping to need to catch my breat. I can go shopping in store other than layne brayntt aloth i still go there. I can do lots of things i never did before. Thats why i must live this life becuse there a life out there that i was not living 27 lbs ago.

May 26, 2012

0

I Did It

My uncle Mal died on Tueday. I was never close with him but i needed to go to his funrnal for my father. After in the Jewish religon we do something call stitting shiva pepole sit and rember the love one snd food is seved and others bring tons and tons and tons of food. This could be a bandest nightmer. the furit basket have stared to come somehow they become less fruit and more choclet and cookies all the stuff i would have gone right for. Then to make the whole thing better my faimly was there. I not great freinds whith very meny of them my 1st coisens are 15 to 20 years older then me and still look at me as the chubby kid in the family who eat becuse she sad, upset. lonely I am the only one who is bigger in the family.i looked around to see what i could eat there it was protine lots of it chicken salda and little tiny roll ups that when you un rolled with out the bred was the perfect size for me and i knew if i sat long enough i could chew it and i had tryed cold cuts at my house and had no problem. My cosin who have no idea what i did said to me why are you on a starvation deit don't you want the cookies cakes ect. I keeped a bottle of watter in my hands during all the cookies and cakes knowing i can not eat and drink at the same time. Finley my mom bulrted out Laura on a helthy kick she had Weight Loss Sugery she even truned down food from me lately. Then led to a bunch of question how long do i plan to do this ect ect. After my fear that i might lose my band on monday night i was not messing it up I need the band I also need those size 16 paints i have now and all those cookies and cakes will only lead to me being bigger and i don't want that. One family member was so taken with me she said she wanted it but did not want to give up things. I told her if your not willing to change your life and your relationship with food and work on this evey day then this would not be the right choice for you. This is only a tool and it will only work if you work the program right not if your going to screw with it

May 26, 2012

2

Ugg

so i started to have some syomtoms of another UTI last firday just that i was peeing more my thought we just incress my fuild. Then i started to have a funny feeling by sunday afternoon i supepect maybe i have a UTI sunday night i became missable. I called the dr frist thing in the morning and they said you have a uroliglist apointment on wed do you think i could wait at frist i said okay but when i started to vomit and i was not keeping water down i knew i was in trubbble i called the dr back and said no i not sure i can wait and they said the frist they could get me in was a 3:20 pm with the nurse parcton for my PCP. I am still on antibotics for my last UTI and she relly had no idea what to do, She tryed to get hold of my uroligsts to figger out what to do, she mentoned the hospital and i said no i relly rather not she wanted to send me home and wait till the next day to see my uroligist i was dizzy and i knew i was deharated and she agreed I explaned to her how banded pepole should not get behind on fuilds and i was so nausas and was now at dry heavs as there was nothing left to come up as i had stoped drinking and was thowing up what i did drink. She agreed to give me IV fuilds two litters latter i was not better and still in the worst pain every this made my lap band seem like a peice of cake it hurt so bad. Finely around 7 she said I am sorry i can not send you home with a clear mind you relly should be in the hospital they can give you fuilds iv nusness meds and pain meds i am calling an amblenes, at the hospital they started askiing about my band, They do alot of gastic bi passes not gastic banding at this hosptial. That why i went with the one i knew did the band and did it well. They said with all the vomiting they were woried about a slip and this is why they hate the band and when it comes to this and they started asking about my sugeron and whated to talk to him they said would you be willing to let us do a revison if something is wrong with the band, They even paged the resdent on call for there barartic program to talk to me about a revison, Well the good news is the band is in pace they did a ct san and saw i had kidney stones and worst a major kideny infection and the dr said you know were admitting you right at this point i was under morphine and did not care about much expect that the morphine was making me feel so much better it was the only way we got though the ct scan other wise i would have never made it, They admitted me and gave me ton of fuilds to help me pass the stone and also get rid of my kindey infection that was the start of this whole thing. They asked me to eat i keeped explaning i am banded and i have lactose intalonince and need mushy food to them this ment ice cream cut cup pan cakes cut up muffins ground pasta each meal got worst. I said i can not eat this stuff I have a band in pluse i was so nausus that it did not matter, Finely they called in the barticitic nutrionist and looked at what they were giving me and said she can't eat any of that she has a band pluse offering a banded person ice cream and cake is like giveing an alcoholic a drink she said what she needs is protiine she probely very tired form lack of it and asked me how i felt i said whiped out draned and just blah. she got everything startened out and she went down to the kichen he self and explaned she needs less food more times a day we need to offer her a snacks with protine in it we also need to make sure she has two protine shakes a day to try and make up some of the lost protine that i had not had in the last 3 days and she also need to have access to water at all time and crystal light so she can meet her fuild recments all the sudden things changed. And best of al my dr said good new we know what you have do you want to go home he frist gave me scips for pill and i said do you know if these can be crushed then he said i don't know i explaned my dr has made a big deal that everything has to be crushed or lquid. He said why would you do this to your self? did you think about how your life would change? he said i never understood why pepole do not deit and exsizes I said you want to know exsizes i at the gym before my sugery 6 days a week one hour each time sometimes two I said i worked with a nurtionist on a deit and the most i lost was 4 1/2 lbs over 6 mounths only to get my peridod every mouth and gain 5. I said i did think about how my life would change how i would never eat a pizza again how i never have a handbuger on a bun how i would not be able to eat or drink toghter how my tast buds would change i said i thought alot about and I hate that question I lost 27 lbs in 4 weeks were before the sugery i stuggled to lose 4 1/2 and if that means crushing pills and takeing lquid form then so be it he gave me some persctions and i was on my way problem is no one had these percptions I got one that can be order tommorow and they were able to be change to something else. Then i find out that Cypro lquid form dose not come genric and it 55 dollors for what would be a 3 dollor perction I am not paying 55 dollors for this I going to make some phone calls to my urolgisest and see if it dose come genric mean while i am sitting with an untreated kindeny infection till i get this mess straitgen out

May 24, 2012

2

Love Of Blended Ice Drinks

Yes every year i look foward to those blended ice drinks frapacoino , strawbery lemonaid aid slusshy i just love them. so I can stil have them just in a diffent way i thought i share some of my cool summer idea to help me with my love of ice blended drinks This one is called Elivis Has Left the building 1/4 a cup of greek youget ( i uses trader joes becuse it has the least suger around and less callors . 1. Table spoon of peanunut butter ( Trader joes make a Ruduced Gilt one that tast like a reecee peanutbutter cup that is on 100 calloris per 2 table spoon when i mentoned it to my nurtionist she said That she hears about this peanutbutter All the time and how every seems to love it) 8 oz of milk ( I uses soy I like earh blance soy the best 0 1/2 a bannna and Ice Blend well sip slowly other of my favorits is Carmel Curch 8 oz of milk ( again i like soy) 1 scoop of vanilla protione powder ( i like Unjury or Iopure ) 1 Table spoon of butter scoch suger free pudding 1 table spoon of carmmel syrupr ( suger free ) I like a little more Ice Other of my favorits is Starbery Cheese cake smoothy 1 soop of vaniila protine powder 1 table spoon of cheese cake suger free pudding 8 oz of milk ( I use soy again 1/2 cup of starberrys Ice blend Craving a Frapaconio Hazlenut Mocchcion 8 0z of soy milk 1 scoop of Cholet protine powder 1 tea spoon of decfae instent cofffee 1 pacakge of splend 1 tea spoon of halznut suger free sypryp Frozen starberry lemonaid 1 cup of crysltal light lemmonid i like the alll teady to go packs i scoop of UNjenery strabbbery sherbert powder Ice Blened well As a kid how meny of you enjoy snow cones. Guess what you can still have them just make them useing suger free sypup I have 13 diffent flavover If any one wants more i have a ton more of these yummmy frozen ice treats I have one each morning

May 19, 2012

1

This Is The Way I Plan To Live Becuse I Have To

So my order of suger free syrops came and my father was over visting and he draged the box in and he said good god why would you need these how long do you plan to stay on this deit. to my answer the rest of my life you don't go and do a band so i can go back to eating cheese bugers and frise i said i did this becuse it was my last chance i done deits and i can't do them they never work. This is they way i need to live for the rest of my life do you think i would go though sugery to have a band inplanted just so i could go back to doing what i was doing. I said this is not a magic bullit this is my tool it give me some control that i need. To wich my dad repled so you never going to eat five guys again becuse i went in and they have your faviorts the bacon dubble cheese buger and your cherry coke and there firse you know how much you love those firse.. Other freind said this is just one more crazy deit your always doing crazy deits. She said rember the blood type on the Grapefuit one or how about jenny craig or nutrosymtims she said you never succed with crazy deit no way you can succed now This is my life and you have to get mad to want to change it. One of my freinds who was larger like me we used to joke around about food and make jokes about her weight one day she droped dead of a massive heart attack leaving 4 kids she was just 40 years old. I don't want my family to live with out me I vowed to my self at her furnral that i would do something so my family would not be standing there. I keeped that promice and plan to. So yes i do plan to live like this my whole life It make me think about the relationships i have it maybe time to change the ones that are not going to work for me now. I know longer can be made to feel better with food. I know that it will not slove any of my problems. Some pepole in my life need to be cut out of my life becuse they liked me better and want to keep me fat this will not work any more

May 18, 2012

2

A Letter To Starbucks

Dear Starbucks, I want to thank you for sending me the email reminding me that it is Frapconio sesison and that you have a new flavor cookies and cream and that your offering them half price in may. But I no longer need your Frapaconis to help me deal with my feeling I know longer am going to drink a venta one becuse i am sad upset lonely tired ECT. So i hope you do not mind but i have no choice this year but to get rid of your email. I am starting a new life and Starbucks Frapacoino are not in it even if you have a new cookies and cream flavor i must say no. sincenerly Laura

May 14, 2012

4

Eating Out

today i went out with my mom for mothers day. Frist i asked for a kids menu the guy told me he would not give me one i explaned i had a lap band and he looked at me like i had five head i explaned it like a gastic bi pass i can only eat an oz of soft food. He said this is are menu share with some else. I looked at the menu there was nothing i could eat everything was bread shrimp crab cakes a salda and best of all i asked about the soup it had pasta in it. I explaned again i can not eat these food I explaned if i eat too much i thow up all over your table. At that point the manger came in I explaned again i have a lap band he looked at me like i had five heads and I said a Gastic Bipass and he said OH okay so. I explaned i could not eat that much food and i needed it to be soft becuse i could not drink and eat. we came up with scambled eggs unsted of the 3 course meal I ate about 1 oz eggs are so hard for me by the end there always too hard no matter how much i chew, I could have had sammon but a fellow bander gaver me a great pice of adivce never ever try something for the frist time in public and i have not had samon yet so i was not going to try it out, The manger was very nice he did not even charge for my eggs I think he felt bad about the way i was treated I have to rember to get a card that said i can eat off the childern menu

May 13, 2012

3

If At Frist You Do Not Succed Try Again

so after my frist stuck eposed were i ate too big a bit of ground beef from a sloppy joe I was a bit nevous about toccos. This is one of my kids favort they ask for it all the time. I knew i could eat the meat and it was just chewing it well last time i was suck it was becuse i ate with out thinking about it so i gave in and made taccos No way was i eatting it plan so mashed it up in some avoccdo and i chewed it when i thought i had chewed it enought i chew some more and took very very small bits I am happy to report i got down my whole one oz protion and did not have a stuck eposed i was so exicted

May 12, 2012

4

If You Can Dream It You Can Do It

alot of my freinds think i took the easy way out why don't you just deit and excizes why did you need to do something so extream. I have deit and excized i go to the gym 5 to 6 days a week i try and watch what i eat nothing. I know how i got hear but i also konw that nothing else was working. I had hip pain all the time back pain and knee pain it get in the way of what you want to do when it hurts to walk up the stairs becuse you hip and kneese hurt to do it it makes you want to do less. I was one poit away from being debitic i had high blood prusser took meds for it I sleep with a sleep apena michen and i had acid reflex that i could not control. I also had lost 2 freinds this year to Obsety realted illiness they both had massive heart attacks and they were in there 40's and early 50's. I did not want to be like that I want to live for were i can do things. I dream of camping with my kids but when you bigger it not possble to do these things. I wanted to walk up the stairs with out stopping to catch my breath and thinking about my knees and hips. So yes this is extreamIt not for everyone but it is for me. I need the control I get with my band In a little over 2 weeks i lost 21.5 lbs and just that 20 lbs make my hip not hurt when i walk up the stairs I can walk up a full fight with out stopping to catch my breath. I know i can get my dreams of being heathy again and reclaming the me I want to be Thats why i did this

May 11, 2012

3

My Frist Minnor Stuck On Frist Full Day Of Mushie

I made sloppy joes i love them there very wet ground trucky easy to eat and so i thought i pulled out my 1/4 a cup portion chewing my food It tasted good after all those choclet protine shakes as i was packing up the leftover i put a big pice into my mouth did not chew it well. all the sudder i felt as if an elphent was sitting on my chest. Lucky Michelle drilled into me what to do was walk. I walked over to my dog put her leash on and off for a walk we went for a nice long walk all the sudden i started to cough out pice of meat and the rest seemed to move the dog was happy for her exra walk and i learned a lesson think before i put it in my mouth.

May 10, 2012

1

Folllow Up

I had my 2 week follow up and it went well i was advanced to stage 4 mushie/ softer food. It alot of info to take I told them that i could not even look choclet after two weeks of choclet protine powder I told them it took care of my 30 Pluse years of love with the stuff now if they could just do something about red velvet cake we be all set. I had one agenda get back to the gym. so i asked and i frist was told okay to zumba / no to body pump then I asked the nurse she said Okay to light working out maybe okay to zumba / no to body pump. Then the fellow came in and looked at me. Who i did not like and I told him that too. But he said Okay zumba oaky to working with my trainer / okay to water arobics in a week / no to body pump. so the surergon came in and i asked him he said what is body pump I explaned it weightlifting enderness. Is Fellow said you do not take no for an aswer do you. I said I not fond of the word and he said fine knock your heart out but if it hurts promice me you'll stop and no sit up. I said okay No sit up dose not mean no cruches he said sit ups and dose not mean no hover. I then told him i wanted to switch dr and he asked me why i told him i did not like the fellow and he said what happened I told him he yelled at me and did not listen and i told him about what happened in the hospital and how he let me go dehirated and then got mad when i could not catch up. He said to his fellow she mad say your sorry you owe her that. His Fellow said she looks great. The sueron said i sure she loves to hear that becuse she dose but thats not what she wants to hear just say your sorry so we can get on with it. So his fellow did muble it. I had one stich that had worked it way out that was taken care of . I lost 20.5 lbs so far I feel great and today i going to body pump for the frist time in two weeks

May 10, 2012

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