newlife4nekaylyn's Blog

The Small Things That Keep You Going!

I have found that sometimes it really not the big things that keep you going its really the small things. My husband put up a meddle fence in our back yard but left a very small space so the kids could get through if they needed to. And when he put this fence up there was no way my fat little body was going to get through. I had looked at it many times and wondered can i get through this? And i didn't want to try because i didn't want to look like a fool trying to squeeze through such a small space. But this morning my husbands truck broke down and he needed the jumper cables from his shop in the back yard. Now we keep our back yard locked up like bank vault, and he had all the keys with him so i swallowed my pride and went for it, I thought well its early and the only person i can be a fool in front of is myself right?? So i looked at this small space for about two mins and just say oh well the worst that could happen is that i get stuck and have to call someone to cut me out right?? So as i was walking behind the trash can i thought ill just close my eyes and hope for the best and before i knew it i was through and i didn't even have to work at it. I was like OH MY I MADE IT!!!!!!!!!!! I really made it!! I even made it back through without a problem it is really a good feeling knowing that before i couldn't have made it through if my life depended on it and now i am sliding through with ease! So i am calling this my BIG win for this month!

newlife4nekaylyn

May 28, 2012

Back To College Monday!!!!!!

Monday i will be going back to school, I am so scared and excited! My life didn't really turn out like i thought it would leaving high school in 2005. Sure i went to college just like all my friends and i did the classes but after a while i realized that i had no clue what i was going to do and while i knew i had a good job i was content with not going back after two years. I always had the intention on going back but i wanted to go back when i was sure i knew what i wanted to do. However my intention's got lost somewhere between gaining weight and life. I didn't want to go back to school because the thought of sitting in a desk at about 300lbs was just to much for me. Not only that i didn't feel like going to classes everyday. I thought that i would go back to school to do hair and nails but again i wasn't sure and it felt like i was always stopping myself. When i got the job as a dental assistant at my fathers dental office he told me that i should start doing the billing and the insurance so i was told and shown how to do it and i started. I was a little tricky at first but once i got it i realized just how much i really loved doing it. So why not make that my job right? Why not go back to school because now i have no excuses. I am healthy i am fit and i have the drive to do it. I have had many colleges call me and once they talk to me they have told me how much drive i have is amazing. I know what i want and i know where i want to be in the next five years. I honestly had no clue that i had that in me. I have the drive to do what i want and i have to want to, to get it done. For the first time in a very long time i am taking my life back into my hands and not letting myself stop me. I have placed so much pressure on myself that at times i thought i was going to blow my top but really all that pressure seemed to move me in the direction that i needed to be going. I looked at my kids and i thought if they are working their butts off in school right now why cant I? And if i am telling them they have to go to college and i quit and didn't go back what kind of a message is that sending to them? I feel like i have to prove myself in order to prove to my children that just because you make a few mistakes that you can fix your life to be what you want it to be. If i can go through lap band and get to a healthy me and make my kids healthy along the way then why cant i show them that i can also go back to school at 25 and make something more of myself. I have shown them that it is ok to ask for help when you need it and to reach for the stars and find something that makes you feel like your on top of the world and go for it. Here is my main point i am a smart person, I have done things backwards and forwards, and i have made it this far. But with out the step that i made to start my second chance without lap bands help i would still be sitting on my coach drinking my sodas and eating like crazy and being an unhappy person with all these i want too's. So i want to say thanks to my Doctor and thanks to everyone at Bariatric solutions for giving me this second chance with my life! I couldn't be any happier then i am right now with myself and my choices.

newlife4nekaylyn

August 4, 2012

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The Small Things That Keep You Going!

Back To College Monday!!!!!!

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