I feel like i have made the biggest mistake. I clearly did not get the band for "myself ", but for my other half. When i first met my other half i was "chunky" but by no means fat. I watched what i ate... worked out....ect. After being together awhile i started gaining weight. After the birth of my son i weighed 233 pounds. Over the next 15 months i gained almost 70 pounds. I started looking into lapband and my other half was all for it. He didn't by any means push me into doing it.... He just thought it was a good idea. I kinda of felt like his friends looked at me differently because of the weight gain.... Almost as if i embarrassed him. I was fairly happy being big, i knew in time i would lose the weight when i was ready and willing to give it my all. I am not ready and not focused. I am hungry and unhappy. I see all my family having such a good time today, and they are eating. I feel like i am missing out. I was supposed to be on a liquid diet for awhile and I've already cheated. I've had yogurt, potato salad, 3 cheez it crackers and a few bites of biscuits and gravy and 3 french fries from my sons happy meal. . I know in a few hours my mom is going to bring out even more food that i am probably going to eat. I have no idea what to do next. I feel like if i get it taken out that i will let down everyone. : (
