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My Journey

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Some answers to Your most burning questions... How much will I lose with Lap Band?

OK, I have been posting on this blog for a year now and those of you who know me have come to realize I am a bit of a nerd and spend a lot of time surfing the INTERNET looking for and asking questions. I try hard to read all the posts and make comments when I can but one theme that keeps popping up for many is their frustration with not losing the amount of weight they wanted to or fast enough. I like many of you probably did not ask all the right questions. I am a nurse and I know I did not ask everything and have found out a lot of my answers on this blog, on the INTERNET and from my own dumb mistakes. I am no expert but I am a true believer that we can all learn from each others life experiences. I am not your typical lap band patient. I have lost greater than my 50% of my total weight in my first year and believe me I feel very fortunate but I have worked the program. But if you really knew me you would learn to know that when I set my mind at something, I can be very OCD. I use this blog as my new addiction, I checking it religiously to see how others are doing, it is free and it does not add any inches to my hips or numbers to my scales. So you ask, what is Diane trying to tell us??? Well tonight I was doing my usual INTERNET surfing. My question was, How much weight can a lap band patient expect to lose?Wow, imagine, I found some answers and all were pretty consistent with what my doctor had told me. Hmmm, I also found this calculator on gottolose.org How much can I expect to lose? So I plugged in my height and starting weight and this is what it said.... I was 116 lbs over weight when I started, My ideal body weight should be 132 and I could expect to lose between 29 to 63 LBS. Well friends do the math that is about 50% give or take a few pounds of what I need to lose. 50% of my weight would be 58 lbs. To date I have lost 80 lbs, and by their numbers I have another 36 lbs to lose. It also showed me how much I could have lost if I had the gastric sleeve or the bypass and guess what I have pretty much exceeded all their numbers. My point is, no matter what surgery we have ladies and gentleman, WE have to work the program, not 50% or 75% of the time but ALL the time. We have to continue to work to change our behavior and develop healthy habits. This is more than just losing weight, this is gaining life and a better quality of life so like the article says, focus on how you feel not how much you are losing. Focus on all the positive and not the negative. Also everyone, stop beating yourself up, we are all worth the effort and we are all our worst critque. No one ever needs to tell us we did something wrong, we are all to busy say, yes I did it that was me Guilty as Charged. So you ask, if you have lost what they statistically expected are your going to settle, the answer is NO, not only NO but Hell NO! I am going to prove their statistics wrong, invalid, and I challange each of you to do the same.   Here ya go!   Your Most Burning Questions about Lap Band Surgery So you'rethinking about having Lap Band surgery for weight loss, you're bound to have alot of questions. How does it work? How will it affect my life? How much doesit cost? These and many other questions are important to ask, and Iencourage you to learn more. But for today's purposes let's get straight to thequestion that is foremost in everyone's minds:   How muchweight can I expect to lose with the Lap Band?   There are really twoanswers to that question. Let's take a look.   ANSWER #1:Most people lose 50 to 60 percent of their excess weight with the Lap Band.   Some people lose a little more. Somepeople lose a little less. But, on average, most patients who have the Lap Bandprocedure lose half to almost two-thirds of their excess weight in the first 1to 3 years.   So what does that translate into in terms of howmany pounds you'll lose? That all depends on where you're starting from. Theheavier you are, the more pounds you will lose. For example, take someone whoweighs 600 pounds with excess weight of 450 pounds. If they lose 50 percent oftheir excess weight, they'll see 225 pounds go away. In contrast, consideranother person who starts at 220 pounds with 65 pounds of excess weight. Fiftypercent of their weight would be 33 pounds or more.   So the pounds lost will vary greatly per person,but the ultimate goal is the same: to lose a significant chunk of the extraweight you're carrying around. We strive to work with each patient to reach aweight loss of two-thirds of their excess body weight. What that means for youwill be based on your personal needs.   How much you'll lose will also depend on how muchyou adapt to the guidelines for eating andexercise after you get the Lap Band. The good news is you're notalone on this part. We have a whole aftercarestaff whose job is to help you to adapt and maintain and healthier lifestyle.Plus, your Lap Band will be the best reminder of all, helping you to feel fullafter eating theright amount offood for weight loss.   You also might be wondering how fast you'll lose the weight. The answeris that you should see a nice, steady weight loss over 18 months to 3 years.Honestly, this is not about speed, because rapid weight loss is not going to bea healthy weight loss. This is one of the great things about the Lap Band.Because it's adjustable, we can keep modifying the restriction level you'regetting to make sure you're achieving a successful rate of weight loss, allwhile also avoiding the rapid weight loss that you may not be able to maintain.Depending on your starting BMI, a good rate of weight loss will probably beanywhere from two to eight pounds per month.   All this said, there is another answer to thequestion of "how much weight will I lose."   ANSWER #2: Don't focus on the pounds.Focus on how you feel.   Don't focus too much on exactly how many poundsyou're losing per month and comparing what you're losing to others you meet,say, in your support group. You're going to know ifyou're making good progress toward your weight loss goal even if you never stepon a scale. Because you're going to feel better.   Losing weight is the main purpose for getting theLap Band. But that's really just a means to an even more important end:improving your health.   As you lose the weight, you're going to startfeeling better. You're going to have more energy. You'll be able to do thingsyou couldn't do before – from touching your toes and fitting into clothes youfeel great in to playing on the floor with your kids and going for a brisk walkwith a friend. For many Lap Band patients, losing weight even means improving orputting an end to troubling medical conditions from diabetes and high bloodpressure to sleep apnea and acid reflux.   So, while I can't tell you exactly how many poundsyou personally will lose, I can tell you this. Thanks to weight loss with theLap Band, you should be physically and mentally healthier. You'll have a betterquality of life. You'll feel more confident. And, you can expect to live longer.   Repostfrom: by Nives Champion Aftercare Manager at True Results January 27, 2011  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Maintenance

Wow! Has it really been that long since I blogged, March 2013! Yes it has been a while.   For those of you who do not know me, my name is "Love" and yes I still love my lap band 3 years post op. I am at goal weight and a normal BMI and have successfully maintained that weight for 1 year now.   The questions i still get asked are: 1. How much is in you band? ( I have no idea, I have not had a fill since January 2012) 2. How much can you eat? I eat about a cup to a cup to a half of food, Most meals consist of protein and veggies. I am one of those low carb eaters by choice because i still have issues with carbs. One I love them, two they get stuck, and three I lost weight better by eating on the low side. 3. What can you eat? Anything, yes I can eat most foods. The issues for me are, if I chose to eat a slice of pizza it will fill me up much quicker and I will be hunger much sooner. I do eat pizza and small burgers or sandwiches occasionally but it has to be the perfect storm. My band has to be cooperative and I have to be relaxed and take my time. Not the type of foods I eat out in a restaurant. When I eat out I usually eat off the appetizer menu or share with my hubby or friends. I am a cheap date! 4. If you had to do it all over again would you do the surgery again? That would be a big YES, lap band has given me back control over my life and my health. It is true you are what you eat, I eat healthy now and I feel great. 5. Don't you think you are too thin? NO, I am a normal BMI. You are suppose to see my collar bone and I am suppose to be able to feel and see my hip bones. Geez world it is really healthy to be thin. 6. Do you drink protein shakes or eat protein bars? Yes, I still supplement with protein bars and shakes. I do not drink or eat them daily but I always keep a good supply of them around. It took me lots pf trial and error to find protein supplements I like and that taste has changed over the past 3 years. I found the most difficulty finding a protein shake I could stomach the smell and taste of. I personally hated and still do the premixed drinks, too sweet for my taste. I ordered off a bariatric web site in the early days and used a lot of unflavored protein powders. Today, I like Pure Protein, Frosty Chocolate and Vanilla. They are my base and I add flavorings, fruit, peanut butter and ice. I never use milk to mix with unless I am supplementing them as a meal and need the calories. How did I learn to like the powders, it was necessary, I needed to eat between 90-100 gms of protein a day when I was weight training and this was the only way I could get in the necessary protein to build muscle and loss weight. You see I had plateaued for a very long time and still had 30-40 lbs to lose to reach goal. If you eat too little you will not lose weight and your body will stop losing. 7. How long did it take you to lose your weight and how much did you lose? It took me 2 years to reach goal and I lost 132 lbs. I like many of you thought I would have my weight off in a year, boy was I shocked and disappointed when that did not happen. I stalled really bad and stayed the same weight for about 6-7 months right before my 1 year date. 8. Do you exercise? Yes, exercise is key to losing and maintaining weight. These days I am not as aggressive and obsessive as i was when trying to melt off that 132 lbs but I still exercise.You have to really work to find out how your body burns calories and how many you need to maintain. Figuring all this out took me months to figure out. I used a fit bit, my fitness pal and a trainer to help me learn to use my body as a fat burning machine. Fat and muscle weigh the same, a pound is a pound and a pound of muscle does not weigh more than a pound of fat. Use this as your vision, a pound of jello is your fat and a pound of chicken is your muscle. The mass of the jello is greater than the chicken but still weighs the same. That is why when you are exercising and toning you look smaller and the scales my stall. I know silly but so true. Also when you are exercising to build muscle and tone you need to be in your target heart rate to maximize your burn of calories. Losing weight is really a delicate balance of everything and is so much more than just cutting back the calories. 9. Since it took you 2 years to lose the weight why could you not lose it on your own? Well I guess the answer to that is yes, I could have lost the weight on my own without my band but I never, never could have maintained it for a year without my band. I view my band as my safety net, my inner voice, my conscious so to speak. It keeps me focused and honest with my self. I was a closet eater, if no one saw me eat it, it did not count. Sound familiar to anyone? 10. Do you have a lot of excess skin? No, I am fortunate and do not have a lot of excess skin. Do I have a nice tight, firm body. No, I have the body of a 58 year old women who lost 132 lbs and I am very happy with how I look in and out of my cloths. And believe me it has taken me a while to get comfortable with those words. Would I like to have some nips and tucks, yes it would be nice but my WLS does not recommend, At my last visit in June we discussed cosmetic surgery and he informed me that the benefits did not out way the risks for me. My surgery would be completely cosmetic, I have no skin break down or health issues from excess skin. So I am happy with me and my Victoria Secret Boobs! lol 11. Do you consider you are on a diet and do you get tired of watching what you eat? No, I have adopted a healthy life style. Have you ever noticed what skinny people eat, they do enjoy desserts and they do enjoy high calorie foods but they enjoy them in moderation. Moderation and balance is the key to maintaining your weight, learning that your body uses food for fuel and if your intake is lower than your needed use you will gain. So keep moving if you feel the urge to eat. 12; Do you drink while eating? Sometimes but only sips. Fluids fill me up and if I drink while eating I get stuck and PB or slime and neither is pleasant. I do not drink high carbonated beverages, I do have a soda stream and I do drink low carbonated beverages that I make using half a pump of gas I drink these only occasionally when I want to treat myself. 13. Do you drink alcoholic beverages? Yes I do drink Alcohol. I have had several bad experiences with alcohol during this journey and had to learn the hard way that alcohol and weight loss do not mix for me. I always loved martinis but have had to learn that one is not enough and two is too many. So I drink my wine and have an occasional martini on special occasions and savior the entire glass. Remember alcohol is empty calories and has absolutely no nutritious value at all and no a fruity drink is not a substitute for one of your fruits. I do not drink beer, I have tried and for me it is too fizzy and makes my stomach hurt and causes a lot of bloating. 14. Final question, what do you do if you get hungry between meals? Silly question, but here it is. I eat! I try hard not to eat in between meals and to not give into boredom eating or head hungry. I believe in planned snacks. Boredom eating is one of issues that we all have and feel and the sooner you learn to accept and deal with them the better off you will be. We all need to Analyze why we eat and when we eat. i eat when bored and like to snack late at night. So I plan snacks and makes sure they are low in calories or if high in calories they are packed with protein. I do not keep sugary treats around, I keep dark chocolate, protein bars, nuts, peanut butter and bananas, apples and pop corn for snacks. I have to seriously watch the nuts and popcorn and not have them to readily accessible.     So this is my life on maintenance, is weight loss easy, NO! Is is worth the effort, YES! Do I love my Band, YES! Would I do it again, YES!   Everyone's experience with lap band is different, there are basic rules yes but the key for me was finding out how lap band was going to help me. I honestly do not think about my band these days, it is part of me and how I eat. Small plates and small portions are just how I eat these days. Funny, most of my family now eats off a salad plate these days, I have quilted them into my feelings on why America is fat. Portions... Portion Control and learning to put the fork DOWN and give it 20 minutes before you go back for seconds.   I wish all my lap band friends and family success and never compare yourself to others or allow others to make you feel bad about your journey.   Me than:   Me today:

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Success or Failure "Who's to blame?"

Wow are we a judgmental bunch! I read these blogs daily and daily I become more and more frustrated with the lack of sensitivity we show for one another. And I am sure someone will slam me today for this blog but honestly I really do not give a flip. We all come to this site for help, think about it ladies and gentleman none of us could do this on our own. Not one of us could lose weight and keep it off. Each of us has our own personal set of reasons as to why we are obese, read the paper, listen to the news, As a society we are getting more obese daily, our eating life styles have to change if we want to succeed with any WLS and face it this is HARD. Some of us have been very successful and some of us are still struggling. Some people may never be successful because they can't get the physiological side of this process hard wired. What do I mean by that statement, eating correctly is half the battle! I am fortunate, I have lost all my weight, well don't pat me on the back too fast. I still struggle daily just like I did at 252 pounds, I wake up every morning knowing that I have to work every minute of the day on eating right. The rest of the world is not on my plan, the rest of the world could care less that I can't eat certain foods or certain foods make me throw up. My point folks is this, we have to help each other. Some of us get this really easy and quick and some of us are really hard headed and may never get this. But honestly is it not worth trying to coach one another and having a little patience, compassion and human dignity. After all remember we were all once the fat person in the mirror and the whole world has been judging us for a long time, thinking we just sit around and eat bon bon's and stuff our faces. As we become thin, please don't let us become the people who have judged us for so long.   In my line of work I am required to take sensitivity training, maybe we could all benefit from a little training! Sad we have to teach adults to be nice, no wonder our world is surrounded by so much evil and violence.   So my topic who is to blame, only us and if we choose to fail we have no one to blame but our selves, just look in the mirror!   Lapband is not for everyone, WLS is not for everyone, Surgery does not work for everyone and you and your surgeon can determine what is best for YOU!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

I Have Arrived!

Well.................... a very deep subject. So my fellow bandsters, new found cyber friends I want to share my success with you and help you to understand that this process is possible but you have to jump in with both feet and be 100% committed to this process. So I will go back to the beginning. High my name is Diane and 2 years ago I was morbidly obese. I used food as a coping mechanism for every aspect of my life. I ate when I was happy, I ate when I was sad, I ate when I was stressed and i would even eat and lie to myself about the fact that I ate. (Sound familiar) Well one day, I not only had to take a long hard look in the mirror but I had to recognize that my body was no longer coping well with the extra weight on my 5'1" frame. I weighed 252 lbs at my heaviest(Check out my profile, I was very "FAT" there is no other word to describe me. Oh yes I did have a "NICE" smile, still do but now I have cheek bones) I like many of you had tried many WL options from fad diets to Weight Watchers and Jenny Craig and also like many of you I FAILED! Notice I said "I" failed. You see all of those "DIETS" worked but what I failed to do was truly embrace the changes that were needed in my life, the changes that I needed to be successful. But I now believe I had to fail in order to succeed. I see myself just like any addict, I had to hit rock bottom before I truly could commit myself to changing my life. When I started on this site I chose to pick a name that I could grow to love, a.k.a. my user name LovetheNewMe. The other decision I made when I signed onto this site was to be honest and give back as much as I was taking away. I like many of you read and sat in the back ground for many weeks and tried to learn, not only from the successful but also from the struggles.   If I could pick three things that have made me successful I would have to say they are "Me, Myself and I" I am sorry to burst anyone's bubble but the Lapband is not why I lost weight, I lost weight because I have learned how to eat and I have learned what a portion is and I have learned that you get out of this what you put into it. If you sit on your butt and expect the weight to fall off, or have your band so tight that you can only drink liquids or puck back half of everything you eat, YES you can lose weight but YOU will not keep it off. You have to embrace the concept of the band, the band does not prevent you from eating the junk food, actually the band encourages you to eat junk food. I know your all thinking this women is flippin crazy. But think about it, when your band is tight and protein will not go down what do you lean toward. SLIDERS! Foods that are high in calories and low in nutritional value. I have read over and over on this blog that people had the surgery so they would not have to count calories, track their food or exercise. Well good luck to all of them because I know me, I am the queen of manipulation and I was real good at telling me that it was OK to eat the fast food on the way home from work and still eat dinner because no one saw me eat it but LITTLE olé me, myself and I. So, what is my point...   You have to embrace a healthy life style and you have to remember that what you lose you can always gain back if you do not embrace a healthy life style. It really is true, You are what You EAT!. You have to learn to eat like a thin person and think like a thin person to be a thin person. I am still in the phase of my journey that I am a thin person but there is still a FAT girl living inside me that still struggles to get out some days. I am determined that the "FAT" girl in me is gone forever. I keep pictures of me at my heaviest in plain site, in my house and office. I do not want to ever forget how far I have gone. Just looking in the mirror does not always do it for me, a picture is worth a thousand words. Yes I have reached my ideal body weight, Yes I have dropped from a size 24 to a size 4 (no that is not a type "O") I still log my food every day, I still weight and measure my food, I eat off a small plate, I lay my fork down between bites, I do not drink with meals 30 min before or 30 min after meals, I do not graze, I do not eat unplanned snacks, I do not succumb to peer pressure and I DO exercise 4-5 days per week.   The best advice I can give any bandster is: Follow the rules
 
Keep in touch with your WL Surgeon
 
Drink Water
 
Exercise
 
Set realistic goals (Boys and Girls we did not get FAT over night and you are not going to get thin over night. To lose weight you have to decrease your intake and increase your activity. Your body is a living, breathing machine and you to have burn calories to lose weight and the only way I know how to do this is to exercise. It still takes 3500 calories less than your body needs a week to lose one pound per week. That calculates out to 500 calories less per day than your body burns. You have to learn what your body needs just to maintain your current weight. There is a very narrow balance between what you need and not eating to little. If you eat to little your body will think you are starving and eventually stop losing weight.)
 
Learn to eat healthy( The reason you have to do this is because of rule #5)
 
And last and the most important, EAT YOUR PROTEIN. (It has been proven that bandsters that heat 70gms or more protein are more successful with weight loss) Protein make you feel fuller longer and takes longer to digest thus decreasing your desire to eat.
 
And last bit of advice and probably the most important; Learn to love your self, believe in your self and know that you can do this. Anything is possible with hard work and dedication.
So here is the old me beside the new me.       Good luck to all of you who are just startng or those of you who are struggling. If you are struggling, forgive your self and move forward, if you are just starting or thinking about LBS, know you are going to have to work hard because this is a Life Style Change and just having the surgery and the band does not mean you will lose weight.   LovetheNewMe

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Keeping a Commitment to Yourself!

Hi, everyone! Hope everyone had a great weekend and is doing well on this beautiful, hot summer day. This past weekend I have been doing a lot of soul searching about commitment and why I seem to be stuck for the past month when I felt I was doing everything right. The first 6-7 months after surgery I did well with my weight loss, I lost 1-2 lbs per week, had 2 fills, 1 unfill. I failed to exercise regularly as my doctor told me because I was not motivated, so basically the weight in the beginning dropped at a fast rate. But I weighted 248 lbs, 5'1" tall. (check out my photos I was quite the little butter ball) I ate around 800-1000 calories a day and tracked what I ate. I used the lap band web site, watched the videos, logged my foods, read everything I could get my hands on and participated in the forums. I was committed. I thought. Then I got comfortable, I looked better, felt better,and like I said things were going well. Then the weight slowed down, but I was still losing, so I started using the expensive treadmill I bought for Christmas, 2 or 3 days a week. I had pretty good restriction after my first fill, I had too much restriction with my second fill and they removed less than .4 of a cc. Some days I feel restricted, some days I can eat what ever I want. So over the past few weeks I asked myself, " Diane are your really committed to this journey, are you in it for the long haul" Boy is that an eye opening question. My answer is yes! So I had to recommit to why I started this journey, I look a lot better now, but seriously, I am still obese. Just not as obese as I was 8 months ago. I can wear a size 14 but a size 14 today is probably not what a size 14 was years ago. Let's face it guys as a society we have all gotten larger and so the designers have made the sizes fuller to growwwwwwww, with us. Sorry just a little play on words there. But honestly, I was fat so I feel I have the right to talk about myself and have an opinion. So how do I make sure I can keep this commitment to myself, because honestly in the past at about this time I start getting Bord with things and fat Diane would seem to resurface. I cannot let this happen this time, or maybe I should say I WILL not allow this to happen this time. So this is what I did this weekend to try and figure out why I seem to be sorta stuck, lose a pound, gain a pound, loss two pounds, gain one pound, loss nothing. What I committed to a month ago. 1. 2 weeks ago I joined curves, and I am proud to say I have went 4 days a week since I started. I got my curve smart key today and boy I thought I had been working out, well now I am really working out. 2. I committed to blogging and being honest with all of you, I have kept that commitment also, I make every attempt to blog my feelings at least weekly and I read the other blogs and comment to lend encouragement and honesty to others. Many of you have encouraged me, some directly and some indirectly. I find even though I have never met any of you formally, we all share so many experiences and we can learn so much form each others successes and failures. 3. I committed to writing down all of my food and not snacking between meals," the graze thing" boy I think this has been the hardest. I tired using the lap band web site to record and this wasn't working well for me, when I was at work I would write my food down and try and log it to the web site in the evenings. I wasn't always consistent. I had post it notes all over my office with bits of info on them of what I had eaten daily. I tried drinking protein for breakfast, no between meal snacks, increasing my protein, watching my carbs, looking at my fats, etc, etc. I thought about getting a fill so I would eat less, but realized over the 4th, I may not have total restriction but I was not listening to my band. I had fallen into the crutch of wanting my band to do the work not me. Now let;s face it guys, I loved food, I love to cook, I love to eat because no one gets as big as I did by just cheating a little. Seriously! Sorry for digressing. Like I said logging the food on the lap band site was not working well for me so by reading the forums' blogs and internet searches I found some answers I am going to try. Saturday, I did a lot of Internet searches; How many calories should a lap band patient eat?, How much protein should a lap band patient eat? How many carbohydrates should a lap band patient eat? How many calories do I need to decrease to lose 1 lbs a week? How many fewer calories do I need to eat to lose 2 pounds a week? What drives the metabolism, How do you jump start your metabolism? I am not sure but I am sure I did a few more I have forgot about by now. So what did I find, lots and lots of information. So what now? I think the best site I found, was right here on our own blogs. www.myfitnesspal.com The site is free, you plug in your height, weight and your life style. (Now be honest about the life style) You can tweak the protein to what we should eat, and there is a mobile application that you can use on your droid, I-phone, I-touch or blackberry. It is free, it will allow you to add stuff that isn't in the data base, build a recipe and calculate your servings. It tells you how much you should loss based on what you eat and exercise. Honestly, not sure what the long term result will be but it will also allow me to run a report I can take to my nutritionist for her to evaluate at my next visit. It adds your exercise points back in but I have decided to eat these for now to see how the next few weeks go. So what have I learned about myself over the past 72 hours, I am OCD big time. But I need to be OCD or I will never make it for the long haul. I have to hold myself accountable, I can not expect anyone else to do that for me. I can not lie to my self and I can not expect the band to do all the hard work. Some of the work is changing my own thought process about food and how I cope with life. Do I have restriction, yes if I listen to my band and to what I was taught. Eat off a small plate, cut my food into bite size pieces, chew each piece 20-30 times, lay my fork down between bites, eat at the dinner table NOT in front of the TV. If I finish my food under 20 minutes give my brain time to catch up with my stomach oh and lastly make healthy food choices and eat protein first. Now if I do all of those things I do have restriction and I am satisfied for 3-4 hours. Question is, do I feel full? The answer to that is no, but I feel satisfied with what I eat. I still measure all my food, eating 2-3 ozs. of protein at each meal, learning that a serving of vegetables is really 1/2 cup except lettuce of course. I will probably measure my food for the rest of my life because obviously I do not understand serving sizes.   So guys I challenge all of you to commit to your self. Think about why you did this, it should have been for you. You are the only person you have to be honest with, you are the only person who knows what you put in your mouth everyday. You are the only one who really can answer the question."ARE YOU REALLY COMMITTED TO THE LONG HAUL?" We will have good days, great days, bad days and totally sucky days? We will lose weight, we will gain weight, we will stay neutral but what matters most is our honesty to ourselves and our commitment to change how we use food, how we think about food and taking this one day at a time.I am committed or maybe I need to be committed some days I am not sure but I will say, I am so glad I had the surgery, I am thankful for this support forum and last but not least I LovetheNewMe! Have a great week and believe in yourself because "YOU" are worth it!   Edit note: (p.s. I learned by logging my food that I may not be eating enough consistently and maybe my body is going into starvation mode. I will keep you posted if I lose anything over the next week. I started tracking every morsel on Saturday the 9th of July. So crossing my fingers ) Try out the web site it is pretty neat and I got the idea from reading one of our blogs. :iloveuall:

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Are you a Pessimist or an Optimist

Well Good Morning to all of you LapBanders! Are you having a wonderful day, are you having a successful lap band journey? Well I am choosing to have a wonderful day and I have had a wonderful lap band journey. If you can't answer yes to both of those question, you need to ask yourself WHY the H E L L NOT!   Hi, my name is Diane, Love to all my BFF's on lap band talk. I have been banded since October 2010, and yes I am a successful lapband participant. I set her dormant most of the time, surfing the site, occasional liking a post or making a comment. I don't really get caught up in all the Bull S H I T that goes on in the blogs or on the forums, because honestly people are going to do what they want and you can't fix stupid.   My philosophy on life is to live to the fullest and you get out of life what your willing to put into it. There are times in life when we all ask the question,"Why is this happening to me?" God, why do you put so much burden on me? Seriously, how much more can I take or can I do?   Seriously folks don't ask those questions because, life is just that LIFE and it will always throw you curve balls and it will always put obstacles in your path, it is how YOU chose to deal with the curve balls and the obstacles that defines your path. If you want to be successful or optimistic about anything it is your attitude that is your defining grace.   Let me explain: What is a pessimist? a person who habitually sees or anticipates the worst or is disposed to gloomy.
What is an optimist? the tendency to EXPECT the best and see the best in things, hopeful, confident.
Now I want you to read both of those definitions and take a good internal look at your self, stand in front of the mirror and ask your self, Am I a pessimist or an optimist?   If that person staring back at you from the mirror is a pessimist, I am here to tell you, YOU WILL FAIL at this WL Journey. You will never lose all your weight, you will struggle at every obstacle the band throws your way. You will whine about being hungry, you will whine about being stuck, you will whine about not losing weight, you will blame the band, the surgeon and everyone on this sit who has been successful or is really trying. Face it everyone, trying to lose weight sucks, and it is hard whether you have Lap Band or some other tool helping you. It is going to be hard work but if you believe in yourself, NOT the BAND, you can and WILL be successful I know because I was and am!   So the next time life throws you Lemons, instead of crying over split milk, Make a nice cool, refreshing glass of Lemon Ade sugar free of course.   Today, I dedicate my blog to my mother. My mother is 84 years old and is dealing with Dementia. Well maybe I should say we are dealing with mama having Dementia. Honestly I never thought we would be here, my mama was always such a vibrant lady, always a on the go, the life of the party. But now she is scared and lost and what is the saddest is she knows she is lost. She woke up yesterday morning at my house and walked out of her room like a frightened 2 year old waking from a bad dream. She was disheveled and crying. "Di, how did I get here? I went to bed in one place and woke up here? How did I get here?" She was sobbing, it broke my heart to watch. It took us the better part of the morning to reconstruct the night but with time and patience she was able to put her night back together and realize why she was with me instead of at her place. You see we are relocating my mama to be closer to me and my brothers, she had spent 4 days of hell, saying goodbye to all her old friends, her great grand children and grand daughter. She had packed her 84 years up in boxes and loaded them on a big truck. She spent the night in a hotel, had lost her suit case and drove for 8 hours, unpacked a truck into her new home, went to dinner in a strange town, went to bed in a strange bed and woke up scared. Now I ask you, What would you do or feel? Lost, scared, unsure of what is happen, Yes you would and so would I. I told my mama it was going to be OK! She said to me" Di, it may be OK but it will never be the same!." WOW what a powerful statement, and you know what she is right, it will never be the same. But it will be OK, and why will it be OK, because we are choosing to be optimistic.   We all know the end result of Dementia, you slowing lose your present, live in your past and forget that there is a tomorrow! So why not make the most of what time you have left of today and continue to enjoy life. We could all give up on mama and just pretend this isn't happening or let others deal with it but is that really fair?   So you see, life has now thrown me another curve ball or more lemons, I have whined, I have cried, I have asked those questions, Oh why me and my mama but today, today I am choosing to be hopeful and confident that my mama will slowly descend into the shadows of darkness known as Dementia, I am choosing to be hopeful that she can remain independent with minimal assistance from her family. I am choosing to make Lemon Ade. I know the odds, I know what the final outcome will be but it truly is about the journey and I am choosing to make this a wonderful, hopeful journey for me, mama and my family.   So friends I ask you again are you a Pessimist or an Optimist and if you are a pessimist may I suggest you look really long and hard at that person staring back at you from the mirror and ask WHY?  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Keeping It Real!

Well Bandsters another Thanksgiving (#4 since I had surgery) has came and gone and even though I made enough food to feed an army I still was true to my healthy self. it is amazing how I have changed over time and how much I continue to appreciate the healthier side of life. This year has been filled with ups and downs and there have been many challenges that could have made me resort back to old habits and gain back my weight but I stayed true to my belief in myself and maintained my weight. I read a post this morning on my FB page and I really loved it. It was called the "15 things to give up" I thought I would share them with all of you and I hope you can use them in your life and your journey.   1. Doubting yourself 2. Negative Thinking 3. Fear of Failure 4.Destructive Relationships 5. Gossiping 6. Criticizing yourself and others. 7. Anger 8. Comfort Eating 9. Laziness 10.Negative Self Talk 11. Procrastination 12. Fear of Success 13. Anything Excessive 14. People Pleasing 15. Putting others needs before your own   When I read these words this morning I thought WOW!.... Someone wrote these just for me because I think at one point or another I have done one or all of these behaviors and they have not served me well. I have been very successful with my WLS and I am very thankful for that. I so appreciate the friends I have met on LBT and this site. I have made 7 wonderful friends who without some days my life would seem empty, they are always there to support and never hold anything back. LBT brought us together and FB keeps us together. Some of us have had the pleasure of meeting in person and this has made our friendships all that much stronger.. Dawn, Janet, Terri, Michelle, Cheryl, Dee, and Carole you are all so very special to me and I am Thankful this Thanksgiving that you are all a part of my life. WLS and LBT brought us together but what keeps us together is our bond of friendship and sharing our lives and families with each other.   We have a few more holidays to go this year but I am looking forward to each and everyone of them. As many of you know my mother has Alzheimer's disease and each day that she continues to have the memory of her life and her children and grandchildren I cherish and consider a gift from God. Dealing with mom's disease has really put prospective back in my life and continues to help me on a daily basis to try and remember to stop and smell the roses. At Thanksgiving this year my family all came together, yes we had a wonderful meal with everyone's favorites but the best of the day was watching the smile on my mother's face as she sat and talked with her sons, her grandchildren and her great grandchildren. Here is a picture of four generations of the women in our family and Mom is the glue that has held us all together all these years.   So as you work toward your goal remember to" Keep it Real", this is your life and remember we only get one chance at this life so make it worth it. Believe in yourself and your success with come in time with patience and hard work.   "Love the New Me" aka Diane  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Top Things That Just Tick Me Off And Just Rambling!

Hope everyone is having a great weekend and a wonderful relaxing Sunday. The day is beautiful here in SC, sun is shinning but it is still a little cool for the south. I don't know about everyone else but I can't wait until spring. I have so much more energy and motivation when it is warm outside. I find the winter months to be a little depressing and I do not feel as motivated to be outside and exercise. I am proud that I have went back to curves a week ago and have met my goal of going on Saturday mornings, and Tuesday and Thursday evenings after work. I need to set a new goal this week of at least doing 30 minutes of exercise daily of at least walking or something. I need my tread mill moved so I can use it, my son moved in late last year and it is in his room and a little hard to use. My husband says he has to take it apart to get it out of the room and has not done that yet. First thing that ticks me off lately. I go back to see my surgeon next week one , I had my last fill on Jan 30th and I am still struggling with solid foods most days, I do eat but it is usually late in the afternoons and evenings, I am getting all my protein in but with supplements. I keep thinking the band will loosen up a little and some days it seems to and others like yesterday, I just gave up and ate Greek yogurt and drank protein. I am still holding at 160 lbs, so at least I have slowed down on losing for a while. On the 30th I was at 175 which was up 5 lbs from before Christmas. I did find something good to eat this weekend, we ordered take out from the local Chinese restaurant and I ate a tofu stir fry, it was yummy and the tofu was silky soft and slide right down. I was only able to eat about 1/2 cup but it was yummy. I went out today and purchased a fit bit and tied it to my fitness pal account so I could track my activity and calories burned. I will let everyone know how that works out. I have been a little lazy lately and feeling a little frustrated with food and eating in general. I haven't felt this way in a long time but it is just so frustrating when one day things go down with out problems and they same things don't the next day. Welcome to bandster hell, I guess. The last thing that ticks me off today is people who use this site to promote sales of products. I was reviewing the forums and blogs this morning and found a blog that someone had started yesterday, she said she was 2 years out from lap band and had lost 150 lbs but was promoting a protein drink diet to get back on track. I thought to my self, every lap band patient knows that gimmicks don't work, diets don't work and getting the lap band has to be about changing your life and behaviors. Not sure why it pissed me off but it did, I feel we all work so hard on trying to live with lap band and trying to change out lives and live like others and the last thing I needed was someone telling me I could lose weight with lap band drinking yummy protein shakes. SERIOUSLY! I drink the damn shakes because nothing else goes down some days and this is not how I intend to lose my last pounds. I want to eat, enjoy my food portion. So shame on you if you are a lap band patient for encouraging us to drink protein to lose weight instead of change our behaviors and learn to live with lap band. I know we all have the freedom to post and believe what ever we want but SERIOUSLY give me a break. Ok, I feel better now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

No Regrets

I started this journey 7 months ago and yes it has been a journey. I had my appointment with my surgeon today, it was 4 weeks post a fill and slight unfill of .4 cc's. I had lost 10lbs since my last visit. I am down 56lbs since surgery now and have dropped from a size 24 to a size 14. I really am enjoying the new me, I went to the beach last week and actually was not embarrassed to wear a bathing suit. My husband and I had so much fun, it was great not to feel short of breath or have the pain in my knees I had the summer before. We road bikes, walked on the beach and had a wonderful time. It is the first time I can actually say I went on vacation and actually lost weight not gained weight. But back to my journey. This journey has had it's ups and downs, I have had to learn to listen to my body and what my band is telling me. Eating early in the morning is just not an option for me, I drink protein. I have learn to be creative with my protein drinks and use unflavored in my coffee or lattes from Star Bucks and call this breakfast. Unfortunately I was one of those people that thought weight loss surgery was a cop out, but believe me I have changed my opinion. This has been one of the hardest journeys of my life. It truly makes you learn to make healthy choices or pay the price. I have paid the price along the way when I have tried to eat pizza or pasta. Yes I can eat them but it is a painful process and they sit in my stomach like a piece of lead as the digest. I have found new loves, vanilla protein shakes with peanut butter powder, I consider this a treat, a little crushed ice to make it thick and I think I am drinking a milkshake. Yummy! One of my favorite desserts has always been German Chocolate Cake, last week I found, chocolaty coconut, Biggest Losers Protein Bars. I told my husband, you know you have crossed over to the other side when a protein bar is the best tasting thing you have eaten for a while. He thinks I am crazy most days, but is one of most devoted supporters. Life post lap band surgery is truly a journey and a new beginning to a better life. I ask my self daily, why did I wait so long to do this, I could have been so much further than I am. But honestly I was not ready emotionally. The emotional part of weight loss is probably the most difficult for all of us. I mourned the loss of food in the beginning and really did not realize how much I had used food as a coping mechanism until I could no longer use it as a crutch. Food has much less importance in my life now, I see it as nutrition for my body and not something to run to when I am frustrated. My family sometimes has difficulty dealing with my honesty and so do co workers, but if it is between me binging or purging my thoughts, the thoughts are coming out. I have learned in order to be successful in this journey, I must listen to my band and not to the emotional eater that hides in the shadows waiting for me to let my guard down and find a weak place in the armor. I will not fail in this journey, this is for me, I do love the new me and I love the commitment I have made to myself to give this journey 100% of my ability to succeed. As I continue I need to challenge myself to increase my exercise. Actually I need to get off my butt and exercise daily. I am making a pledge to myself today to increase my activities by taking the steps instead of the elevator, walk from my car to my office instead of taking the shuttle, spend 20 minutes each day doing some type of physical activity. I will be successful in this journey!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Personal Pity Party

Well Diane is having her own personal pity party. Go figure. I got my feelings hurt yesterday probably not the first time nor will it be the last but this time I am really having trouble shaking it. So who was the wonderful person who decided to be so honest with me my "loving husband", I type that with much sarcasm and anger at this moment. As all of you on this site know I have lost a lot of weight over the past 19 months, 103 lbs to be exact. I am very proud of the fact that I have been able to be successful with lapband and it has not been without ups and downs and struggles along the way. So what did the "jerk" say that hurt so much. Well here it goes, we were working outside trying to get the pool open and I had to get in the pool to srub the sides and bottom so I went to put on a swim suit. OMG, as I am sure all of you are aware of is that when you lose a lot of weight your skin does not always snap right back into place. Go figure, right! Well Mr. Brilliant says to me, "Honey, you know you are damn sexy looking except for one thing." WHAT? He repeats himself, now knowing he has crossed the path of no return. EXCEPT for WHAT??? Well I am not sure you know it or not but your THIGHS really look just AWFUL. Oh yeah, he did say it. I think I turned into let me see a TIGER, no may be a RATTLESNAKE, or may be it was SCORPION. So WTF?? Does he not think I look in the mirror everyday and see what I look like without my cloths on? Why does he think I am literal working my ASS off at a gym 3 times a week and doing cardio 6-7 days a week. So have you figured out I am just a little touchy about how I look? I have been struggling for months with my body image, I still saw the fat me for months when I looked into the mirror it was not until just the past month that I was starting to accept the new me. Starting to notice that working out was paying off, I even felt my thighs were looking better, not perfect. But for real, I used to weigh 252 lbs on 5'1' frame what do you expect. I am just hurt, pissed, mad and just can't believe he said it. So what did I do last night, I binged. I reverted back to an old behavior. Well of course binging these days is much different than before, but still I hate the fact that I allowed what someone said to cause me to go back to an old coping behavior. So today I feel hurt, guilty and just totally like a failure. I have tried all day to make this into a positive but I am struggling, I am trying to be a big girl and realize that everyone has an opinion but I guess my feeling is that because he said it, it is how he really feels. So to him, I look awful. I looked awful fat and I look awful thin, so what now.   Well I guess I could continue to feel sorry for myself and give into bad past behaviors or I can just put this into prospective. I know I have lose skin, that is a given. I know I have worked to do to try and tighten up, that is also a given and why I hired a personal trainer and am working my butt off. I spent my afternoon reading the forums for other posts that could help me and this is one I read that really hoped me put into prospective what I feel: "Don't listen to the inner dialogs that continues to put you down despite your success. Because it won't suddenly start happening once you get plastic surgery. Choose to celebrate your achievements now." To take the above statement a little further I will not allow others to sabotage what I have worked so hard to achieve. I could chose to have plastic surgery to rid my self of the lose skin I have but I have chosen to try and tighten up with exercise, it takes longer may not be perfect but I do not want the scars that come with plastic surgery. I will not go back to being that person, the person who used cheeseburgers, chips and Fry's to comfort her. I don't want to be that person, I will not be that person and further more I am not that person anymore. So there hubby take that, maybe you have your own issues you need to work out to deal with the fact that "YOUR" wife looks "HOT" OK maybe that's a little much but you get the point.   So first I am forgiving myself for failing myself and not using what I have learned for the past year and a half and than I am going to forgive the "jerk" I am married to for hurting my feelings. I may not tell him for a few days because I think he needs to realize just what a "HUGH" mistake he made. Because you see I have another character flaw, I may forgive but I never forget...........................

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Blogging

I have spent the past hour or so reading blogs and catching up on the lap band community. As I was reading it came to me that we have all been given a wonderful opportunity to have the support of thousands of people. People like us, who can over advice from first hand experience and learn from all of our successes and failures. I never introduced myself when I started blogging, I just started pounding away spilling my thoughts and feelings on the page. So her goes, my name is Diane, I am 55 almost 56 this November. I am married, have two children, a boy and a girl and 3 grand children, a dog, Lexi ( She is posted with me in my picture) and a cat, Sassey. I love animals and if I lived in the country would have many more than I do, animals love us unconditionally and don't care if we are fat or thin. How and why did I chose lap band? I have been what you call the professional diet queen. I am 5'1" and have struggled with weight gain after the birth of my first child in the late 70's. I lost the weight and just gained it back with the birth of my second child. I lost that weight and did pretty good until I went to nursing school and packed it right back on. In those early years I could keep it around 180 or 190 but still thought I was fat, but I never realized what fat was until I hit my 40's. That is when I really started to plump up, I reached a high by the time I was 50 of 260's and believe me on a 5'1" frame that is a lot of weight and my knees began to tell the story a few years ago. Three years ago my right knee went out, swollen, painful, difficult to walk, etc. I went to the doctor, they x-rayed and MRI. I had some beginning stages of osteo, thinning of the cartilage on the inner part of my knee joint. The doctor injected with steroids, last about 48 hours and then I did the weekly injections to rebuild the cartilage. It puts the cushion back between the joints. That lasted about 8 weeks. Then the dreaded conversation came up, Diane you need to drop a few pounds. I knew this already, I had two bouts of pneumonia over the past two years, my BP was out of control, and I was having sleep apnea. Oh by the way I forgot to mention I have been a nurse for almost 30 years. You would think as a health care worker we would have better health habits. But no, we probably are one of the most unhealthy group of people because we are always taking care of others and not ourselves. I am very stubborn, duh so I refused to wear a CPAP for the sleep apnea, and when I saw the metal they would put in my body as a joint, I said no way. Off to Jenny Craig I marched, I joined for 500 dollars, bought my meals at 120 plus a week and lost down to 195 lbs. Then it became too expensive and I just knew I could do this on my own, portion control and 1200 calories, a piece of cake I thought. NOT!!!!!!!!!!! I plumped back up to 248 lbs within 2 years of stopping Jenny Craig. So that is how I got to lap band. Live a life of pain and not enjoy life or get off your butt and do something about it. As for the nursing, I am a critical care nurse, so you would think I would know better and make better choices. Oh well that is the past and this is the new me. I involved my family in my journey, I made my appointment for the information meeting and took my husband with me and told all of my family. I figured if I was going to make this a life style I better include the persons in my life so they could be supportive. I thought about not telling the people at work, because sadly I was one of those people who thought weight loss surgery was a cop out. Boy have I changed my mind. so once I scheduled my surgery I told all of my peers at work I was having Lap Band surgery on the 28th of October. Now a very good friend of mine at work, Ron, looked at me shocked and said" your not fat enough to have weight loss surgery." I could have kissed him but instead, I stopped and said, "Ron, I am morbidly obese. My BMI is 47.5. I have to lose weight or I am not going to get to enjoy watching my grandchildren grow up. He looked shocked and said, I had no idea you weighed that much. Thank god for the Ron's and the Paul's(my husband) who love us whether we are skinny or fat and see us for something more than how we look. I will tell you I was scared, I think my biggest fear has been that I will fail, fail to loss and keep it off. But that very fear is my driving force, I will not gain this weight back and I will be successful. The difference for me know compared to back in the dieting days is I am choosing to change my life style with a gentle nudge from my band. I always lost weight on the planned programs I paid for, Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, South Beach etc. But when I stopped paying I gained the weight back. Lap Band is a permanent solution to me because as long as i listen to my band, make healthy choices and exercise I will be successful. I know a lot of people struggle with weight loss and the band but in my opinion we fail because we fail to change our behavior. When I don't lose weight now, i sit down and look back at what I am doing. If I am honest with myself, I am snacking between meals, eating past satisfied and not exercising. I chose not to eat sweets, potato chips(which I love), I stay way from carbohydrates, pasta, rice and potato's. Not because I can't have them but because I like them to much and they make me feel over stuffed. I love pizza, can I eat pizza yes, should I eat pizza no. It is full of carbohydrates, so I look for alternatives that satisfy that void. This truly is a journey and you learn about your body and your inner self along the way. For me this journey is not about being skinny it is about learning to make the right choices, developing a healthy life style and spending quality time with my family. So now you no my story. I was banded October 28, 2010. I weighed in at 248 on surgery day and as of today I weigh 180. ( I have been stuck here for several weeks) I started in a size 24 and now wear a size 14. I have lots of shrinkels but who cares, I consider those my battle scars.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Fad Diets And Lap Band: "this Is Not A Diet"

Well I just thought I would blog a little tonight. We have all made it through Thanksgiving but we still have Christmas and New Years to survive and oh let's not forget all the wonderful goodies that will be floating around the office and at families and friends houses all holiday season... So that is what brings me to my topic today: Fad diets and Lap Band, "This is not a Diet"   First I have a couple of questions: 1. How many of you have stopped losing and felt frustrated with the band? 2. How many of you have been so frustrated that you were tempted to fall right back into the dieting yo-yo behaviors of the past? 3. How many of you have been tempted to just leave your band a little tight so you would lose weight faster? 4. How many of you have been tempted to go back to phase one of eating, you know shakes,liquidsiguids, etc? 5. How many of you have been so desperate to see that scale move that you would just about try anything?   Well if this is YOU, than STOP!   Living with Lapband is not about fad diets and continuing some of the same behaviors that got us to this point in the first place. This is a life style change and none of us got obese over night, so why do we expect to become thin over night. Simple: It is just human nature and we live in an instant gratification superficial society. I posted a book in a blog several months ago and I am reposting tonight for those of you who want to continue to use your lap band as the tool it was intended. This was a book written by a lap band surgeon after studying patients who were committed to losing 90-100% of their excess body weight.   I was one of those people who was stalled, no matter what I did the scale sat there and taunted me with the same numbers day after day. I was one of those who looked over and over my diary sheets trying to find out what I was doing wrong. So why didn't the scale move? To lose weight you have to eat 3500 calories less than your body needs to drop "1" pound. Now does everyone really understand what that means, I didn't. Well that's not true, I had read that before and I did know it but I didn't really get "it". Basically you have to eat less and do more but there is a perfect balance of how many calories you need to take in so your body does not think you are starving. Everyone needs to know what their BMR is and understand what that means. This is the amount of calories your body needs just to maintain a normal day of sleeping, eating, working and playing. Everyone;s is different and based on how active you are. I have a sedentary life style, I work in an office and I am basically inactive 10-12 hours a day, moderately active about 2 hours a day and maybe very active about 1 hour a day (if I go to the gym) I really began to understand this once I started wearing my Fit Bit and it took me weeks even wearing this before I really understood why my scales were not moving. I was eating band friendly foods, eating within my allotted calories and portions but the scale would move small increments or not at all. When I started to really analyze my intake and activity I finally started to realize i was losing what was expected due to my intake and my activity. Well I knew i was not going to eat less so I made a decision to be more active. I increased my protein intake, did cardio 5 days a week and strength training 3 days a week. Basically I became recommitted to my band and to living healthy. I had the eating part down but the activity part I still struggled with, I was inconsistant with my exercise and the level and intensity of the exercise.   This is not an easy journey by far but it is achievable with dedication, accountability and true grit!   No one told us this would be easy! No one told us this would happen over night! And they did tell us we would have to follow the rules and learn to make the band work for us. Key words, "Make the Band Work for Us!"   So for all you Newbies out there please realize that success with Lap Band can be a reality, it does take hard work and it is worth every new lesson you learn along the way. When reading the forums learn from both the postive and the negative, there is something that can be learned from everyones successes and failures.   So as promised, attached is the book by Dr. Simpson, "The Last 30 Pounds" .   Wishing everyone a Very Happy Holiday Season, and remember this is not a "DIEt"       The Last 30 Pounds.pdf

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

One Year Band-iversary

Well October the 27th was my one year band-iversary. Wow... what a year this has been. If you would have asked me a year ago if I thought I would be where I am today I am not sure how I would have answered. The road has been bumpy along my journey, I have been too lose, I have been too tight, I have peaked and plateaued weeks and months on end. I have lost no pounds, I have gained a pound or two, I have lost inches, I have not exercised, I have over exercised and I have had knee surgery but my biggest accomplishment is that I really do love "me" and I have learned that food is a necessity for nutrition not a coping mechanism. If I learn nothing else from this journey it will be that I can get angry, upset and frustrated and I know McDonald's is not my friend, my friends have been my family, my co-workers and all of you who have supported me and encouraged me. To all of you who are just starting, or who are struggling and to those of you who have been successful, share your success, admits your mistakes and love yourself! We are all worth the effort that this journey takes!   I weighed in this week at 168, still not at goal but very pleased with my progress and yes, I really do" love the new me." I am going to share some before and now photos with you. I have dropped from a size 24 to a 12.   Cyber Hugs and Kisses to All!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Picture Update

Here is a little picture update. It is possible with lap band and a lot of hard work. First photo is pre surgery, second photo is May 2011, third photo is this week May 2012. Some days I find it hard to believe when I look in the mirror that this is really me!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

MIA

Well gang I have been MIA for a while. busy with work and school. Just to update everyone, I am still on track but have had a little set back. On my journey to a healthy me, I had a little set back with my exercise routine. I selected curves as my gym because it had been such a long time since I had exercised and I wanted to start out slow, I lost 12.5 inches my first month and was so excited in my progress, I think I became a little obsessed with my progress and was attending the gym 4-5 times a week, well 2 weeks ago I went to work on a Friday like always and wham............... I started walking across the hospital campus and my knee went out, I tore my lateral meniscus, The past few weeks have been a serious bump in the road, no exercise and I am on crutches. I have to do 3 weeks of PT and than they will decide if I need surgery. I have no stability in the knee and with out the brace and crutches I end up on the floor. I have really been worried that I would gain weight and have obsessed over my calorie intake. I decided not to have my band tightened because I was exercising and maintaining my intake to the 1000-1200 calorie range. I had just finally gotten to the point I enjoyed eating again and not getting stuck. I monitor my calories on myfitnesspal.com but the not exercise is driving me nuts. I am stuck, still weighing in at 177. Hope everyone is doing good.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Valentine's Day

Well bandster family, I hope many of you took the time yesterday to spend Valentines Day with someone you love and who has supported you. I got up early yesterday, 5am and baked Valentine's for my wonderful Husband, Son and staff. I made vanilla cupcakes with marshmallow cream center, butter cream frosting and decorated with edible glitter and hearts and kisses. Now I know my friends here are saying, WTF is wrong with Diane, she is suppose to be making better choices. I love to bake and I believe it is OK for me to have a taste of something sinful like a cupcake once in a while. It is only a problem if I bake and eat the whole recipe. Actually I enjoyed less than a quarter of a cupcake and I was very satisfied. Tonight I want to share what a wonderful Valentine's Day I had with my hubby, we got all dressed up and went out to dinner and a comedy show at a place here in our local town of Greenville, SC. "Café and then Some" and saw a show called "Life after Oprah" I have never laughed so hard. We joined our best friends, my girl friend had a gastric sleeve about 6 months after my lap band surgery so we are the perfect friends who can share a meal. The night did not start out to well for me, I had two bites of salad and it got stuck, it took about 3 trips to the bath room to get it unstuck but than I was able to enjoy a wonderful appetizer of 3 succulent broiled scallops wrapped in Bacon with a Hollandaise sauce. I left the bacon but the scallops were delicious and so moist and juicy. I had one small glass of Pino Noir and a strawberry dipped in chocolate for desert. I thought I had died and gone to heaven. It was a wonderful evening, I enjoyed my meal the company and we looked smashing if I do say so myself. I am attaching a couple of pic's one from 2 years ago when I was as my hubby puts it Large and in charge and one from tonight. Life and living with Lap Band is possible and we can all do this if we believe in ourselves.         Now you tell me, does lap band work. I say, oh hell yes it does. I think I look pretty good for a 56 year old lady. Remember Lap Band Friends and Family this is a journey!   All of us can do this, with time, dedication and support of the ones we love.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Positive Energy

I sit here tonight after a long day at work, reading blogs and watching "Dancing with the Stars." As I am watching these people 'stars" put them self out there doing something that pushes them out side their comfort zone it came to me, "Is that not what each of us are doing?" We are putting ourselves out in front of everyone and allowing ourselves to be judged for our progress in our journey. I would like for all of us to give ourselves a "10" tonight. A "10" for being willing to admit we are not perfect. A "10" for taking each day, "one day at a time." A '10" for each new healthy habit we embrace and enculturate into our daily routine. We are all individuals and each of us has their strengths and weaknesses that we need to highlight. If we collectively added up all the weight each of us have lost over the past 6 months or a year, would we not be the "biggest losers." And guys being a loser on this site is a WONDERFUL thing, we need to stop thinking, I only lost a half of a pound, I only lost a pound. Instead we need to be saying, "WOW, I lost another pound. After all we are not the gainers we are the losers. For the first time in our life losing is winning. Now how often can you make a negative a positive. We may stall occasionally, we may stumble, we may even fall, but we will pick ourselves up, we will admit we strayed and we will get back on track. So I challenge each of my cyber friends in this weight loss journey to pick one positive affirmation to post for the week and embrace the positive energy it will instill in your life. I am posting a web site that I think may help us all if we could just allow ourselves to believe in our selves and open our minds to some positive thinking. http://www.vitalaffi...ons.htm#example     When I chose my name for this blog I used the positive affirmation theory. LovetheNewMe. Honestly when I started on this journey I did not love anything about me but now after a year of logging into this blog and signing on everyday with my user name "LovetheNewMe." I do love me, I love the person I am becoming, part due to weight loss but even deeper than what you see on the outside. I love the person I am on the inside. It is hard to love yourself, we are our toughest critique, we judge our selves and we always see our failures not our successes. Each time we loss an inch or a pound or make it through a day always choosing healthy foods is a successes. We should celebrate every success we have, big and small. We are learning to lIVIT not dIET, we are learning to Love ourselves.   My affirmations for my journey are:   1. I choose to make positive healthy choices for myself   2. When I believe in myself, others will believe in me also   I say my affirmations every morning as I am getting ready for work, I look in the mirror and yes I talk to myself. and no I am not wacky.   So my challenge to all of us is we put our best foot forward and and get the positive energy flowing on this blog, love your self, support yourself and most important believe in yourself, why you ask, why because you are WORTH IT.   Have a great week all.  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Lap-Band Surgery Works By Decreasing Appetite - Not Restriction

I get asked this question all the time; How were you able to lose weight with Lap Band? Simple I followed the rules!   I read on this web site all the time about every one hoping to get restriction and frustrated because their band is not tight enough, worried that they need more restriction. Well bandsters, the band and our weight loss is not about restriction, that is not the purpose of the band. The purpose is to slow down your eating so you eat less and become satisfied sooner. So if you are new or struggling, read below. I have lived by the rules of lapband throughout my 2 year journey. It has not always been easy and yes there were times I was hungry. This is not easy, it is a very emotional and personal journey. No two people react to the band alike and you have to have a lot of will power and want power. If you are on this site and had surgery, I know you have tried everything else and our now hoping the band is the answer to your prayers. Well it can be but it can also be the beginning of your nightmares if you do not make healthy choices. You and only you can make the band work and the sooner you figure this out the more successful you will be. I am now in my maintenance phase of this journey and living happy with lapband. I have worked hard and continue to work hard to make healthy choices to sustain everything I have worked hard to achieve. Is is easy no, but it gets easier everyday. You can be successful with lapband but you have to follow the rules. You have to become knowledgeable about the band and how it works. You have to deal with your behavioral issues surrounding food and you have to modify your behavior. If you do not do these things, you may lose weight but research has proved that successful WLS patients modify behavior. Below is an article from another site I wanted to share for all of you who are new and for those that are struggling and of course a reminder for us that have been successful.   Good luck and success to all new and old, LovetheNewMe!   EDIT/Addition added after original post: Just to give credit where credit is due this post came from Dr. Simpson's web site. This was a site I found very early in my band journey and have referenced it many times. It taught me things about the band that I was not aware of, it also is the site that helped me lose my last 30 lbs. this is the web address, check it out. He is one MD who coaches his patients that they can lose all of their weight. I read his book , "Losing the Last 30lbs" and it was very helpful. http://drsimpson.net/index.htm     Weight loss surgery works by decreasing appetite-allowing people to eat less and utilize their fat stores more efficiently. What successful weight loss surgery DOES NOT stop you from eating anything. Whenever a patient says they don’t “feel restricted” it means they want the operation to do something that they won’t do for themselves. In this case, they want the operation to keep them from eating too much, or eating something. Successful patients DO NOT describe appetite suppression in that manner. This became clear when several groups showed that food remains above a well adjusted band for only a minute or less, not longer. It is not that the band keeps food from going through it - -it is the act of food going through the band that allows the satiety mechanism to go into effect. The study was simple – take a patient who is losing weight, and feels their band is at a good point. Give them food that they say satisfies them for a long time, and label the food with something we can see on an x-ray. We were shocked, and others repeated this experiment. But, then it all made sense. Whether they have a band, a bypass, a sleeve, or a DS – all of the operations allow a smaller amount of food to provide appetite suppression. Without that, appetite suppression does not occur. This is revolutionary in all aspects of patients – it is not “restrictive,” and having the band tight is not helpful. The bottom line is simple: solid food, slowly eaten, provides prolonged appetite suppression. This can be all overcome by: eating too fast (for band patients this leads to esophageal dilation, erosion, or slips or by drinking liquid calories, or soft food. What works for our patients who have had long term success: Measuring the food they eat
Not depending on the band to tell them when to stop
Not depending on the band to tell them when they are too full
The Lap-band will NOT tell you when you are “full”   The band will NOT stop you from eating “more” food       So the latest revolution in weight loss is not in a new tool, it is in those four simple words that will keep your tool sharp: eat small portions slowly.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Hitting The Wall Again!

Well it has been a few weeks since I have posted. Nothing really exciting going on in my life. Still sitting at 158 lbs. It seems every time I get a fill I have an immediate drop in weight and than plateau again on the scales and start losing inches. I had my measurements done 3 weeks ago and next Saturday will be measurement day again, so we will see. I know I don't need a fill because I am not hungry between meals and barely eat 1000 calories a day. I have been working really hard on drinking the water and making sure I get all of my protein in. I only went to Curves once last week but did some distance walking. My other knee started acting up, last Tuesday I had a really bad day and work and went to curves and took it out on the machines but instead I think the machines took it out on me. So I have decided to look at alternative gyms and find a personal trainer to help me lose this last 26 lbs. I contacted a local gym here in my area and they charge 35 dollars a session with a 175 dollar planning assessment and nutrition plan. The training sessions are usually once per week and you have access to the gym 7 days a week. Has anyone else ever used a trainer and does this seem like the going rate. I know I should be happy with my weight to date but some days I just find it depressing to work so hard at eating healthy and nothing happens. You would think being this far post op I would get over myself and just be happy with my results to date. I think this is the time when I usually sabotage myself and say, "oh what the hell you might as well eat what you want your not losing anyway." This is when I thank god for my band because it makes me think before I act. I am still liking my Fitbit, it does make me very much aware of how much I move during the day and today I have not been moving. Took the day off from work, feeling a little under the weather. The wonderful GI bug going around at work and it has not been a very pleasant 24 hours. Lap band and GI Bug do not mix well. Enough for now, keep you post on what I do about the trainer and the gym. Just not sure about the cost.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Panties and other things

I will apologize to the guys for this topic up front.   Now I am going to warn all of you male bloggers I am going to discuss a rather x-rated topic. My panties! lol Well yesterday I finally broke down and bought my self some new underware. I know your all asking how in the world was she still waring the same panties she wore 68 lbs ago. They were a little baggy in the seat but they were dear old friends and I just wasn't ready to go to the expense of purchasing new ones. I have had to purchase new bras, on two separate occasions but the panties worked so I left them alone. Well for two weeks I have been saying to my husband, "Honey I gotta buy new panties, one day I am going to be walking down the hall at work and they are going to fall right off." It had got to the point when I wore my tee shirt spanks that my underware gave me a wedgy. TMI right but you have to fully appreciate how much our bodies change and all of the things we go through when losing weight. Well I bought two pair of really cute hipster style panties at Target. They were so cute, "Not granny panties at all" They were a soft gray pattern with this cute little bow on the front and flat ecru colored lace on the legs. And guess what they are a size "7" and they look so cute. Ok, so they are only underware and I know I am the only one that is going to see them but they make me feel thinner. I know that may sound ridiculous but they do. I have not bought underware that was not of the granny pantie style for years, I got satin ones, lacy ones, etc.   Tomorrow, Monday June 27th I start my exercise at Curves®. I have to be there at 7am, so excited. Spent the weekend working in the yard and swimming in the pool. Also bought some delicious protein bars at CVS for buy two get one free. Had a yummy pretzel peanut butter one yesterday for lunch and a chocolate Carmel crunch one today. 200 cal 15 gm protein and low carbs. I like these on the weekend for when I am busy outside and use as one meal replacement.   Hope everyone is doing great this weekend. I will keep you posted this week on my exercise, oh and I guess I get to wear my new panties to work and won't get a wedgy!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Motivation

Thought I would update everyone on my progress with exercise. I have gotten up everyday since last Thursday and I am up at 5am and exercising by 7am. Cardio with muscle strengthen 3 days a week and walking 3 days a week. Sunday's off to lounge by the pool and give the muscles a little break. My knees are holding up pretty good, the squats are a little difficult but I am hanging in there. I had no idea how our of shape I really was. Today I finally got my heart rate up to target zone so I was getting the max effect from the exercise. I think I am using muscles I forgot I had. i can really feel the burn tonight, when I raise my arms above my head. I guess the old saying of no pain, no gain is true. I made the mistake of weighing this morning after I showered. Weight still the same, no gain, no loss. I have religiously been writing down every morsel I stick in my pretty little mouth, average of about 900 calories a day and 60 gms of protein. Sticking to the 3 meals a day and in the evenings I have 1 cup popcorn for the fiber or 1 oz nuts for protein. Staying witiin my calorie count and servings. I guess my body is just comfortable with this weight but I'm not. So girls and boys let't get movin, movin, movin. We can all make this happen!    

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Fat Pant's

Happy Wednesday everyone. Today I want to offer some encouragement to all the new bandsters and all that have been working hard on their weight loss. While cleaning out the closet I found these pants that I "USED" to wear and they were tight before I stated my journey. I have now lost a total of 112 lbs, (Banded in October 2010) This has been an eye opening experience, I never realized how unhealthy I was or how badly I ate. I wish I could say my journey was over but I know that my true journey is just beginning. I now must maintain this new me, I must learn from the past year and rely less on my band and more on the new behaviors I have been drilling into my brain. Portion Control, Protein first and "No Snacking Between Meals" and let's don't forget daily exercise and if not daily at least 3-4 times a week. This is my life now, "Learning to Stay Healthy" This journey has given me back so much, when I started I was not only morbidly obese but I had sleep apnea, I was on multiple medications for asthma and hypertension. I have none of those issues now. I must admit getting here was a journey but being here is both rewarding and scary. The band has worked well for me, it has it's ups and downs but I have learned to work through them and have modified my eating and life style. I love my cyber family and all the support and encouragement they have given me and hope I can pay it back ten times over.   Happy Wednesday!   Picture # 2 is me standing inside of one leg, yes one leg of my size 24 draw string jeans. (I am sure we all have a pair or had a pair of these) Picture # 1 is me in my small top and size 4 linen (no stretch pants)  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Is long term success with Lap band Possible?

This is the question of the day. I have been reading the blogs this week and it is so distressing to see so many of my Lap band bloggers struggling with this very topic. I wish there was a magic wand we could all wave or a crystal ball that we could all look into and see if we were going to be successful. Personally the biggest fear we all have if we are willing to admit is FAILURE. We all ended up here not because we were just wanting to lose weight but because we needed to lose weight, it had impacted our lives in some way and we wanted out. But sometimes what we all do not realize is how much work this is honestly going to be. This is a life long journey and I'm not sure all of us realized that when we signed on. I walked into this with my eyes wide open and I realize that this will be a journey that I will work and live my entire life. I had a incident this past week that made me realize just how easy it would be to screw up. I have done exceptionally well with my lap band and have lost weight well. Maybe almost to well. It has almost given me a since of false security. This past week has been hard, I went back to work after surgery and everyday I threw up. I ask why did I throw up, because I did not follow the rules. I threw up daily and sometimes several times a day for 3 days in a row. On Friday evening my husband and I went to dinner, he wanted Mexican. I didn't feel well but I went. I decided to not order and just share some of his dinner, good move I thought. Where did I go wrong, I allowed my self to eat the one thing I know I have no control over. CHIPS! Well ladies and gentleman I paid for it and I paid dearly. No I did not throw up but oh God I wish I could have. I had the most horrific pain I have ever had in my life. I hurt myself with my self destructive behavior. To be honest I don't care if I ever see another tortilla chip for the rest of my life. I surfed the INTERNET looking for how much damage I had done to my self and my band. So fearful that I had stretched my pouch with my stupidity. In my search a came across this article for some tips for long term success from a lap band patient. I like everyone of us wants long term success and I know I will not find it at the bottom of a tortilla chip bowl. Good Luck to all my new friends and I know we can all learn to lIVIT instead of dIET!     Below is just a small part of the article if you want to read the article in it;s entirety go to http://ezinearticles.com/?Long-Term-Success-With-Lap-Band-Weight-Loss-Surgery---10-Lessons-Learned-by-Successful-Patients&id=3892363, I also posted a link to her blog.     My doctor, my head coach on this banded living journey reminds me over and over again, that it's a tool, and I need to work it. I shouldn't expect "it" to do anything. (A screwdriver can't remove a screw unless you turn it.) I have to work it to get the results I want - and for me that was more than the average 5o% Excess Weight Loss. My band helps me with portion control, controls my hunger, and leaves me with a feeling of satiety when I work it. Here are the 10 things I learned about how to use my tool:       I stay close to my surgeon and his staff. I have a whole team of people to help me on my journey. It starts with my surgeon who is my head coach. I also surround myself with other successful members of the Banded Living community. I don't drink with meals. It defeats the band. I make sure I get enough protein everyday. I eat good quality meals and I don't graze. I do best when I eat for 20 -30 minutes and leave the table. I don't drink my calories - my properly adjusted band helps with portion control but only if I am eating solid foods. (It doesn't restrict ice cream or a high calorie frappuccino, or Long Island Iced Tea). I've learned to take small bites and chew, chew, chew. I also use small plates. I've learned what foods are difficult for me, and I stay away from those choices. I have lots of great choices. I've learned to dine and enjoy food again. I always have a plan or a least a plan B, each and every day for how I am going to use my tool. NO EXCUSES. I'm not afraid to carry food with me (Ziploc bags are my friends), or ask a hotel to open the gym at 5:00 am because I'm traveling and have an early meeting. I journal when I need to. I journaled consistently during my first year of Banded Living. When I wander off track, or gain a few pounds, I go back to basics and journal for a while. It helps me stay in my target weight range by keeping me accountable to myself. I make myself a priority. I take care of my health, I eat right, I exercise, I take my vitamins...and live my life to the fullest!   Now I'm not saying that I use my tool perfectly all of the time. What I am saying is that I've learned how to use my Lap-Band to get great results and keep myself in the same (small) pair of jeans for over 2 years. When I don't use my tool correctly, I gain a few pounds, but I know how to go back to basics, and keep my weight within a normal, healthy range.   If you or someone you care about has a lap band or is struggling with significant weight issues learn more about Banded Living by visiting http://www.bandedliving.com, a community for lap band patients, by lap band patients.   To learn more about how Gloria Samuels uses her lap band to maintain her 90 lb weight loss, visit http://www.gloriasbandedliving.com.   © 2010 Banded Living, LLC. All Rights Reserved.       Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/3892363

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Three Years Anniversary

Wow! Has it really been 3 years since my surgery? Some days as I look back at old pictures I find it hard to believe that time has passed and I really used to be morbidly obese. I continue to love my new healthy life style and thank God everyday for giving me the courage and the strength to continue to stay true to my self and my goals. Weight lose is a journey and weight loss surgery of any kind is not easy. I was once one of those negative people who believed WLS was the easy way out but I soon found out that it was the hardest test of my courage and strength that I would ever experience. I happen to be one of the lucky Lap Band patients who was successful and was able to reach my goal weight. I know many who have tried and failed only to have to go back and start over again. I guess the most important thing I have learned during my 3 year adventure is to never give up on your self. If you back slide, you pick yourself up and start over again. I always remember that if I fail the only person I am failing is myself. You must continue to love yourself and never compare your success or failures to others. Never judge those who succeed or those who fail, we are all different and those differences are what make us unique. I feel I owe a lot of my early success and support to LBT website, I was an early blogger and frequent reader of the forums. I sometimes remained quiet but read and learned as much as I could from all on the site. Since my first years, I have been very lucky to make some very good friendships and develop a strong cyber support group that does not judge me and is always there to lift me up when I need it and to challenge me when I become complacent. Maintenance is hard and you must practice the principles of WL everyday. I have goals for myself that have allowed me to maintain a constant weight and maintain my goal for 14 months now but I am never going to forget who I once was. I keep reminders of obese Diane in my office and my home. I never want to forget where I started and how hard it was to achieve my success.   My advice to all you new members who are starting and seasoned members who are still working toward your goal:   Never give up on your dream; you are unique and if you set your mind to it anything is possible with hard work and dedication.   the first picture is my beginning in 2012, the second picture is me in my fat pants a year ago in 2012 at goal and the third is this Halloween(2013) as a gogo dancer getting ready for a 1960's Halloween Party!   Good luck and much success to all and here's positive thoughts for a healthy eating holiday season!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

New Milestone

Well banster family, I hit a new milestone today I wanted to share. I had a check up with the doctor and when I weighed in today, I am no longer obese,I am now just over weight. Now only my bandster family can appreciate what that means. I started this journey 14 months ago and at that time by the charts I was considered morbidly obese. Needless to say I am very excited. To reach my goal I only need to loss 12 additional pounds, now to no longer be considered over weight I would need to loose an additional 26lbs. My doctor and I decided on a weight based on my bone structure and muscle mass. Now that being said I never started this journey to be thin, my Goal; was to be healthy. It feels good to have energy and not longer have knees that hurt all the time. I feel very blessed to have done so well this passed year and am thankful for my supporting husband and family and for my wonderful surgeon for always being understanding. I never considered skinny and me in the same sentence and it still bothers me when people say I am skinny. I am by no means skinny, they were just so use to seeing me "Healthy" aka Fat that I do look "Skinny". Today people said," now your not going to lose more weight are you because you sure look skinny". So I replied, Yes I do plan to lose a few more pounds because I am still above the goal my physician and I have set. Well that just lead to well, you don't want to lose too much more, you don't want to look old. OMG! Did the forget I am old, and I would rather be think and old than obese and old. So I ask "What does skinny actually mean?" Below are the definitions for Skinny and Overweight. Definition of SKINNY Definition:   1: resembling skin : membranous   2 a: lacking sufficient flesh : very thin : emaciated b: lacking usual or desirable bulk, quantity, qualities, or significance   Definition: Overweight refers to an individual weighing 10% or more of what is considered his or her recommended healthy weight   I actually think I take more offense to being called skinny then to being called overweight.... emaciated. Boy I never thought anyone would use that word to describe me. When I think emaciated, I have an image in my mind of a someone who is so thin you can count their ribs. Now I may be thinner but believe me you can not count my ribs and baby still got Back! Now for those of you just starting your journey, you are probably thinking what is this women ranting about, but seriously can no one give a compliment these days. If you can't say something nice to someone just keep your mouth closed, thank you.   Well I feel better now and I will continue on my journey and will stop losing when my physician and I feel I am at a healthy weight for my body type.   Thanks for Listening and allowing me to rant.   Good luck to all of my bandster family, keep motivated, focused and all dreams can come true with dedication and time.  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

PatchAid Vitamin Patches

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