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About this blog

My journey out of Fatland.

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My Fat Passenger (think Dexter)

Anyone that read/watches Dexter knows about his "dark passenger" that is his inner voice that urges him to kill.   Well, recently I discovered I have a fat passenger. She is a morbidly obese woman who is addicted to eating. I kept trying to shut her up with cheeseburgers and sadly she started taking over my body. So, I'm not going to give in to the bitch any more . She can whine all she wants but I am taking control back. hahahaha
suzahhn

suzahhn

7
 

My Surgery Experience

The form fitting clothes in my closet were disappearing. So were my heels and jeans. Somehow they were replaced with sweatshirts, sweatpants, and men's t-shirts and I couldn't stand the sight of myself. I was avoiding situations where my weight would possibly be an issue. I wasn't living any more, I was existing.   Once my denial was completely drained out, I realized although I promised this time would be different, my dieting and exercise attempts failed over the past 4 years. I made the appointment to learn more about the lap band in October of 2010 and after the seminar I was sure it was for me.   At times I doubted if I could go through with it, if I could say goodbye to overeating. But then I remembered how I felt after I overate, how I looked after I overate. How my health would continue on the downward path if I keep overeating. So, I keep remembering that "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels".   Yes, I can choose to eat that bacon cheeseburger, that steak, those fries. It's not that "I can't eat it because I'm dieting". Now, I think "I don't want to eat that because I want to live".   I had a great surgery experience. My veins are usually very difficult but the nurse got the IV in on her first try . The anesthesiologist was witty and charming and the surgeon was eager for me to start my new life (and also let me know Mondays are great for him because he's well rested ). They gave me a drug to relax me then took me back to the OR. We were talking and next thing I knew I woke up in the recovery room. I was in pain, let them know, and started my pain medication regimen. Then I had an xray done on the same bed, I was glad I didn't have to move around.   Then I went to another room, my husband came in and I was released within an hour. I was happy to go home and sleep!   Today is day 2, I have no hunger for now and I'm so glad this part is over with! I will definitely find some terrible pictures my husband managed to sneak of me a few days before the liquid diet and post them .   Thanks for reading!
suzahhn

suzahhn

6
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