Wow, time has flown by. Surgery was surgery. Felt awful for 4-5 days after. I am fine now, although Christmas was very rough with no fill. Got my first fill last Monday, and I have lost 2.5 lbs already. Yay. This so far is harder than I thought it would be.
I have discovered how messed up my head is about food. I am so stressed now with work and Tim's teen angst, I keep feelinghungry. My band will not let me eat the amounts I feel I need to eat to get through this. I never realized how bad my head hunger is. I really feel like I have no backup and I am flailing around without my life jacket.
I love the idea of losing weight and being slim again, but this head stuff is really hard to start fixing. I don't even know how, and I don't know where to go for help.
Here are some stats so I don't forget. Most ever weight verified by a scale : 244. weight the day before pre-op diet: 239. My Dr. was incredulous that I would spend so much money to lose weight. His comment was why don't you just use the Optifast without spending all that money. I got mad, but I didn't say anything. He just has never understood the problems with obesity and has the sensitivity of a rhino.
I am on my 5th day on Optifast. It doesn't taste so bad now, but I would rather it tasted better. Yesterday I pigged out and had 4 strawberries in an optifast and ate a whole green pepper as well.
I weighed myself this morning, and I am down 5 lbs., but the other times I weighed myself was not first thing in the morning, so I'll hold off on congratulating myself. Also, I have been using the ketostix, and - nothing. No Ketosis. I wonder why that is?
I am starting my pre-surgery diet today, but can't eat till I see the doctor at 2 so I can get my blood test and ECG at the same time. I am hungrey already.
Went to Mississauga to visit the clinic and meet with Dr. Cobourn. The office works at a frenzied pace. Made my decision to go ahead with it and signed on the dotted line. I came home VERY excited. So far, I have only told John and Vickie. I also told Sister Sandi when she called on Friday, and Taya when we went to Bancroft for her driver's test.
Today I posted on the forum, because I realized the since I signed on, I have been eating like a maniac. The advice given was great. I hope I can rely on this forum for support.