When I get to feeling bad for whatever reason, I try to remind myself about the things I'm trying to accomplish. While I may not be there yet, I can see that I have made big changes already that get me just that much closer. So, with that in mind, (and for my own future reference) here is my list of motivators:
1. I want to ride all the roller coasters at Six Flags with my daughters next summer! Right now I can't fit. Very embarrassing experience! :mad:
2. I want to like shopping for clothes again. It really hasn't been fun for awhile. I remember trying on all kinds of outrageous outfits just for kicks. Looking forward to that again. :thumbup:
3. I want less pain! Pain in my back, neck, feet, knees. :crying:
4. I want to be able to sleep like a normal person. I currently have to use a CPAP. I hate it, but I hate having to choose between breathing and sleeping even more. :smile:
5. I would like to take less daily meds. I'll probably always have to take some, but the cornucopia of morning pills bothers me.
6. I have to be around to see the milestones in my daughters lives; proms, graduations, marriages, births etc. (Besides I have to see how my youngest manages to be the first female President, Astronaut and Whale Dentist all at the same time!) :wub:
(These are likely to be edited as I read what everyone else writes, or as I hopefully reach my goals.)
So I still haven't hit my second goal and the scale has slowed down dramatically. I went in for a fill yesterday, so maybe it'll pick up again. I was told to basically "Quit my bitchin" because loosing 15 pounds in the 2 months since I've seen him last was right on track. I can't help it, though. I guess I'm an immediate gratification kind of gal. I want to see steady decreases every day. I'm still 10 pounds away from my second goal, but it feels like I've been here for a while.
I've really begun to notice many little things that I either hadn't noticed before or just plain didn't expect. Examples, you ask? Of course... my shoes are too big! I expected my rings to get bigger, but my shoes? I guess I didn't realize I had fat feet, too. Another example? I had to move the car seat forward to drive comfortably. Did my arms and legs just get longer? Oh wait, no, the butt padding got smaller, so now I'm farther away from the steering wheel and pedals. It took about a week for me to figure out why my arms got tired and my legs couldn't reach when I was driving the car. My third ground breaking observation is that my bra straps don't fall off my shoulders any more. I'm still working the "Why?" of this one out. Last, but not least, regular trouser socks don't feel like they are going to amputate my legs below the knees. I've worn ankle length socks for so long because of that pinching, that it feels strange to wear the cute knee length ones again. But I like all the designs and color, so I'm glad.
Last time I mentioned that I had gotten rid of all sizes larger than 24 because I was in a 20... Now I'm in an 18. I've started pulling out clothes from the back of the closet. The clothes with dust on the shoulders, because they haven't been worn in so long. I don't think I have any clothes (even buried ones) that are smaller than an 18. My Mom wears a16, though, so I'll raid her closet for some clothes. Then I can give them back when they get too big. Won't THAT make her happy... :devil_smile:
All in all, life is good.
Last time I posted I was just shy of meeting my first goal. Well, I finally passed that one. It took longer than I had expected but who cares, right? I'm not really racing anyone here. I had originally set the date for my second goal at Valentines Day. I don't really see that happening unless I get a bad stomach virus or the flu (Yikes! Let's hope not!) We'll just stay on track and see how it goes.
Now I'm working towards reaching my second weight loss goal, 225 lbs. I have about 25 lbs to go. I have about 3.5 ml in the band now and am doing pretty well with it. Beef is a problem and most bread and pasta is out of the picture. I find that I don't really miss it too much. Especially since I had to go shopping for new clothes with Mom last week. We hit the resale stores hard! There were sales everywhere. I didn't even know what size to buy since it had been so long since I shopped! When I got done trying everything on, we ended up buying clothes 6 sizes smaller than I had been wearing! 6 sizes! That's crazy!
After thinking about it for awhile, I realized that the last time I weighed what I do now was right before I got pregnant with my first daughter 11 years ago. I had been slowly but steadily going up and up ever since. I still just shake my head at how it all just sort of creeps up on me. I'm still looking forward to riding the roller coaster at 6 Flags and to burning my CPAP!
I have another fill day after tomorrow. I'm looking forward to having the loss pick up again. It has really tapered off over the last few weeks. I have been hungry like no ones business this past week, too because of the whole "girlie thing." Glad that's over and I can get back on track now.
So I had my appointment yesterday for my first fill. I haven't had much time to get nervous about it. All last week I was out on a 5 day cruise out of Galveston to Progresso and Cozumel. My first cruise ever. If I could I'd travel like that ALL THE TIME!! I mean everywhere (to the grocery store, to and from work, etc!) :wub:
But even better was that I continued to lose weight while on the cruise! The tech at Dr Carters office said that simply did not happen. Even Dr Carter mentioned it was impressive since I had no restriction in the band at all. So I'm feeling pretty good right now. :thumbup:
I ended up getting about 2 cc's at this first fill. He didn't deaden it or anything. It was pretty cool to watch it on the fluoroscope, too. (I'm a geek, what can I say...)
I had been slightly concerned that it would hurt. It wasn't bad. The actual injection stung a bit, kind of like a tetanus shot. The wiggling of the port just felt kind of funky. He was bumping the port around (to get out air bubbles?) and I asked him if he had inserted a bongo drum by mistake.
A couple of hours later I felt some mild nausea, but nothing terrible. The shot still stings a little this morning, too.
I'm looking forward to trying to having the weight loss pick up a little now. Its been really slow so far. Now, to find myself a job so I can continue to afford the fills!
So, its been forever since I've updated. I had a computer issue that my husband 'fixed' for me. So I've since been occupied with getting all my links, documents and iTunes libraries back where they belong. Bless his heart, he means well. I should just quit my bitchin'.
Well, I finally got a job, Thank Heavens! I absolutely love where I'm teaching. There are three teachers on my floor that have all had WLS in the last year or so. I had an issue a couple of weeks ago and found out that I have a (grapefruit sized!) cyst on one ovary. After many pokes, prods, scans and an emergency room visit, it has been determined that I have to have a full hysterectomy next month. Now I'm really nervous! Somehow the surgery for the band wasn't as scary for me as this is. Next week I plan on calling my WL surgeon and seeing if he needs to do any kind of adjusting on the band in prep for the other surgery. In any case my appointment for the next fill (4 days after hysterectomy!) will certainly need to be cancelled/postponed. Crazy stuff!
Other than all that... over a year post surgery and I am still convinced that it was the best thing I've ever done. I have been holding steady right around 200 for about 4 or 5 months now. (Possibly related to growth of enormous cyst? Who knows!) Within the last week or so the scale has finally slipped to about 197. My next goal is at 195. That's where I go from 'obese' to (just) 'overweight.' But while the scale hasn't been moving all this time, the clothes have been changing. I am wearing some size 14's now. I don't think I've worn 14's since college. I certainly don't have the same bod that I had then. (Do any of us, really?) The arms and legs are getting a little baggy. We won't even discuss the boobs! But I'm sort of surprised at how little that actually matters to me.
Enough of all this... I have Thanksgiving cooking to do! Gobble Gobble !!
Today I finally met my second short term goal. I can drop the term 'morbid' and be just obese! (Who woulda thought I would ever celebrate THAT term? Oh well, we take our joy where we can find it!) It took longer to get there than I had hoped, but that's okay. My BMI is down by 14 (49 to 35) and a total weight lost of 87 pounds. Clothing sizes went from a women's 26 (some snug) to an 18 (some loose). Even my shoe size is smaller (THAT was a surprise!)
My next goal is to get to be 'just' overweight. The more exciting part of the next goal is that it will get me back into the 100's! I still have trouble imagining that, it has just been so long.
So, my fellow Lappies, that is about all I have for an update this time. I'm still trying to get a teaching job for next year. Still having trouble finding one. Looking forward to the end of the school year, even though it also means the end of the substitute paychecks...
I'm not much for writing my stuff for all the world to see, but I thought it might help to have a record when I need to be reminded of where I've been and where I'm going.
I was banded by Dr Richard Carter on August 13, 2010. I'm now 31 days past surgery and all healed up and eating regular foods. I had my first follow up appointment on Sept 2. Everything was fine.
My top weight was 311, pre-surgery was 299 and current is about 287. I'm a little discouraged that I haven't lost more, and that the loss stopped when I went on solid foods, but I know it's all part of the game. I have my first fill appointment on October 21. I hope that after that things will pick up again. I'm nervous about the pain; I was told he doesn't numb it first.
Even with the band completely deflated, I've had two times where I forgot to chew and gulped my food. I paid dearly for them both. At least I know what feeling it is that I need to watch out for now. Ouch!
There, I've got this started. Tomorrow I'll give my opinion on public education! (i.e. I'll gripe about not having a job! :thumbup: )
Now to go do laundry and clean the child's room whist she is still out of the house!:smile:
So I decided I need more immediate gratification on this weight loss journey and set several small goals for myself based on lowering my BMI rather than looking at sizes or weight. My first goal is to reduce from Morbid Obesity Class 3 to Class 2. For my height this corresponds to a maximum weight of 260. I wasn't sure about the time limit, so I sort of arbitrarily choose Thanksgiving.
I hadn't been losing any weight for a few weeks and was frustrated. I quit weighing. I knew I wasn't gaining, but I was sick of seeing the same number over and over. Well, yesterday I hopped back on the scale and it had decreased almost 12 pounds!
So now my total pounds down from my highest weight is 33 pounds, and I'm about 65% towards my goal for Thanksgiving. I haven't had my first fill yet, either. It is scheduled for October 21, right after I get back from my very first Cruise!
I'm feeling pretty good today :smile:
So I have begun the whole purposeful exercise thing. I had already been just "moving more" on a daily basis, but now there is actual gym membership involved! My biggest issue is what to do with my kids during exercise time. The two girls are 8 and 11. The 8 year old is very clingy. She is too young to go into the fitness part of the gym. She is actually too young to go into the teen room (where the Wii's are!) but we sort of slide her in there with her older sister. Then they fight and barge into the fitness room, drag me off the treadmill to resolve who is being mean to who. So, today we went over to her elementary school with our two dogs. I started walking the track listening to my music; stopping every few seconds to hear her every comment about bugs, dirt and the dogs. Then she wanted us to leave the track and go over to the playground way over on the other side of the school. Then the dog was pulling too hard. (Its a pekingese, for crying out loud! 12 pounds of hair!) Then she was too tired. So we quit after 20 minutes,came home early and I sent her to her room until bedtime.
I'm extremely frustrated with trying different things to fit some exercise time in. Because my hubby works in the evenings, and the little one can't stay home alone yet, they will always be with me. I feel like that means I will never be able to get anything done other than exactly what she wants to do at that moment.
---sigh!---- find my happy place------
Anyway, 19 pounds more to lose until I meet my next goal. (Morbid obesity class 1-BMI 30-34.) Obviously, that's not happening by tomorrow (the original goal date) but I'm okay with that. The scale is still moving in the right direction, though a bit more slowly these days. I was hoping that regular exercise would speed it back up, but circumstances aren't working with me on this. I cleaned out my closet of all clothes larger than size 24. It was pretty fun, too. Most of the clothes I got for my cruise back in October went away in that sweep, since I was in a 26 then. I will need to do another closet sweep soon since I am in a 20 now. However, if I did it now I would be pant-less by the end of the week. Still need to shop a bit more.
Now, I'm getting ready for my last day as an AP Physics teacher (thank goodness!) but I do need to write their test for tomorrow.
Anyone got any suggestions on how to get the 8 year old to let me do what I need to do - other than velcro-ing her to the wall, of course?
I am now 2 pounds away from my first goal. I had originally set the goal date for Thanksgiving, but I just picked that date sort of randomly. I'm still really happy with my progress. I'm down 47 pounds and my BMI has decreased by 8! I am noticing that I am wearing clothes that I haven't been able to wear in years. I've had two fills and am scheduled for the next one over the Christmas break.
I am also finally making progress on my scheme to take over the world, I mean... get a job. I have been substituting in my district in hopes of getting a long term sub position and turning it into a full contract Teaching position by next year. My long term sub position begins Jan 10. (Earlier if the teacher I'm replacing delivers earlier.) As soon as she is scheduled to return to work, another teacher is scheduled to go on maternity leave. So I am probably set until the end of this school year. Now... just to convince them that they need to hire me permanently!
I have to admit, though, there is something to be said for the flexibility I have in my schedule as a day to day sub...
So when we last spoke I was planning the hysterectomy on Dec 16th. There was no cancer and the surgery went off without a hitch. After the first two days or so, almost no pain medication was needed at all. I was recovering and feeling great. Then... on Dec 29th I began having pain. It was located up underneath my right breats. We went in to the emergency room about midnight. About three hours later they sent me home. Turns out I had gallstones. All they told me was to take the pain meds I had gotten for the hysterectomy that I had never needed. About 6 hours later, I started vomiting. Since the pain never went away, back to the ER we went. This time they admitted me and did an emergency gallbladder removal. Even though this surgery was lap and the hysterectomy was open, it is so much harder coming back from this one. The experiences were completely different; different surgeons, different hospitals, planned vs emergency.
Not to mention that they kept me in the hospital for three days with orders of 'nothing by mouth' in anticipation of having to do another procedure that never happened. Three days with only the occassional ice chip when I whined to a sympathetic nurse.
But now I'm home, recovering nicely. I have my final followup with the hysterectomy surgeon tomorrow.Hopefully he will clear me to go back to work soon.
In any case, I am down to being just overweight, not obese anymore. Yaay!
