I expect to wake up every morning feeling thinner. I never do, but I expect to!
I expect to work out hard at the gym and walk out of there feeling wonderfully fit and look put together. I never do, but I expect to.
I expect to put on pants/skirts every day and have them be so big they need safety pins to keep them on. Sometimes this happens but not always.
I have very high expectations for myself after this surgery. I'm not meeting them, and instead of learning some amount of patience to deal with the fact that its only been 7 weeks and I'm not going to look like Cindy Crawford yet, I get frustrated and this affects my eating, sleeping and workouts.
I wish I could take a pill and sleep for a year, wake up 100 lbs lighter and move on my way. I know it took time to get this heavy, but I lack the patience to wait for the time to not be this heavy. I don't mind the workouts or the cooking or the planning, I just want INSTANT RESULTS every day, every way.
Thinking a discussion with the therapist is in order on this one.
I'm not really down, I just want to buy some patience or better yet trade in a couple dozen pounds for some patience??? :rolleyes2:
Reaching in a cupboard yesterday morning to pull something out for the picnic and I pulled something. Felt something "pop". Just under my lowest rib on my left side.
The initial pain was pretty bad, but it seemed to go away in about a minute. Kept on getting ready to go. Bent over to get some flip flops to wear and the pain came right back!
Took a couple Tylenol capsules. Went to the parade and concert. Ate fine (no problems other than finding decent food to eat around hot dogs and bratwurst lol). No other issues.
Got home, still sore like I pulled a muscle. Put some ben gay on it and went to bed where I could not get comfortable. Finally put a heating pad on and fell asleep.
No better this morning. I want to go work out and go to water aerobics but I'm gonna lay low for another hour and see if it improves at all. I'll be calling the doctor after 8 -- even though they aren't there I'll get someone to call me back.
Pulled muscle? Haven't done any weights on lower body and those muscles were tore up anyways during the surgery? Wonder if I didn't do something with the band or the port? I didn't really strain that hard, and I'm 6 weeks post op??
Any suggestions or insight are greatly appreciated. Hope everyone had a nice fourth!!!
Sandy
:frown:
Couldn't even imagine posting Thur or Friday and I'm up and doing really well this morning so here it is.
Surgery and recovery was more difficult than I had imagined. I yelled at everyone when I got home -- mom, daughter, friend -- hated everyone and everything. So much shoulder and belly pain I could not function for about 6-7 hours after surgery.
Then I just sat down in a chair and prayed hard. I should be grateful! And I did feel better after that, not a lot, but a little. Sipped some water and slept about 6 hours. Better.
Thursday was great. Walked 20 minutes, drank the shakes, water intake good, felt good. Decided to nap late in the afternoon and woke up with terrible shoulder pain again. Took pain med and slept.
Friday was not great. Didn't feel great (shoulder and gas pain), but managed to walk, drink, shower.
Fell asleep last night praying again. Woke up really early and laid in bed and got rid of gas for like 30 minutes. Sitting here putting on makeup to go to WW and the store this morning!
I've been given a tremendous gift. Insurance covered this procedure and God saw me through the surgery. Its my turn to stand up and make the most of this!!!:frown:
So I hurt myself Sunday morning. Really pulled something, even made a popping noise, and still have significant pain. I spent all day yesterday "laying low" and planning on not going to work today or working out.
Sleeping hurt on either side, I did not imagine the pain which I still feel, by the way. But now, I feel more embarassed than anything.
I called the doctor first thing this morning AFTER driving to the gym and doing 60 mins on the elliptical. It doesn't hurt when I'm on the machines, only standing up, getting up from sitting and laying on my side(s)? (Who knows).
She calls me back. It has nothing to do with my band or my port at all. Probably pulled a muscle that was torn up during surgery. I felt pretty embarassed with that one.
My band is in the center of my abdomen between the rib cage, about 4 inches above my belly button. My port is to the right (my right), just above the belly button on the right. The pain is on the left below my rib cage. She told me to go ahead and start core workouts by the end of the week which should strengthen some muscles and hopefully help me not do this again!
I've never been so concerned with not getting hurt, or damaging a band which is far more protected by layers of fat than my wrist, or teeth, or knee!
I wish I could just take back the last couple days and not have gotten so dramatic with it. I apologize to all of you as well!
I don't know what happened to my patience. I had a little. It must have been stored in my boobs and it faded away......
I don't see any change or feel any change in my weight or clothing or looks for a LONG time. I'm losing, but VERY slowly now and its bugging me to no end. I work out 4 x a week at the gym and I don't eat over 800-900 cals/day. My hair is thinning and I'm tired.
I feel like my house is not in order. My house where I live in this case. I spent hours this weekend washing blinds and cleaning cupboards and washing bathroom accessories. It doesn't seem like its been that long since that's been done, but it was all dirty and I'm mad about that.
I am just impatient with my life right now. Nothing is in order (it feels that way to me) and I've lost control. As a Christian I realize I have no control but logically that is not computing right now.
Thank you all for letting me vent. I'll get better............:biggrin:
I considered myself motivated to lose weight, eat healthier and get back into shape. Not so much.....
I meet with a personal trainer from my gym every Sunday morning. The last few weeks I'm not even motivated to go, and I actually cancelled an appointment and had to pay for it two weeks ago. Although I've been doing some work at home, it wasn't nearly at the level I was the first six weeks following surgery.
I talked about my lack of motivation with the PA on Friday at my fill appointment. She suggested I need a Bob Greene instead of a Jillian Michaels. and I felt like I needed to make a change, so I booked a different trainer.
I just got home from a great training and motivation session. He understands where I'm at, where I want to go, and my issues I've had along the way and gave me some great tips and advice. I felt so good I even did the elliptical for 45 minutes afterwards.
Some people have partners that can motivate them. Some people can do it themselves. I have figured out that I don't really have either of the above, so I'm going to look to my trainer for now. Booked two appointments for the next seven days. Hopefully this will help!
:thumbup:
Observations with a smile........
- a regular towel wraps around me without a major gap!
- my friend gave me two pairs of pants with tags that were too big for her and they fit! I have clothes to wear!!
- I did 1000 situps on the ball (over a 90 minute period). Might not be able to move tomorrow, but got them done
- Someone at the gym said I looked "smaller". LOL
- I found a pair of cute capris in the back of the closet (pays to clear it out lol) that I probably wore 5 years ago. I have them on today!! This is the last time they will work. I guess I must have been about 240 then? I'm about 230 now so that's reasonable. My bottom half is shrinking much faster than the top half (arms mostly) with the exception of.....
Bad thing (but oh so typical!). My bras are huge! My poor boobies are already non-existent. That is just not right! LOL.
Have a great day everybody
The LAP-BAND®®® surgery was the first surgery I had since I was 3 (48 years ago). I did pretty well and I've done well with the band. I was told in May (right before surgery) that I had a cataract in the right eye and surgery was required. I didn't want to have two surgeries back to back, so I scheduled this for October.
I had my cataract surgery on my right eye on Tuesday. I felt fantastic afterwards, but have had some complications. I had astigmatism and lens correction in addition to the cataract surgery, and while my vision is better I have flashing and other issues I'm told are will require a second surgery for retina issues.
My lesson is never to take anything related to your health for granted -- joints, heart, AND VISION. I've been sailing along for years seeing with contacts without a problem. I took a lot of things for granted and I learn day by day its not as simple as it seems.
To top it off I can't do any kind of exercise this week and with the additional surgery next week I also can't exercise a week after that. That is hard for me as I'm used to a lot of cardio and weights and this is a setback -- weight -wise.
It is what it is, I guess. I'll follow instructions and be a model patient and do everything I can to ensure my eye is good. Thanks for "listening".
I'm just tired. I feel every bit of my age today. Yesterday was a very busy day at work which is good, and I worked out hard. This morning I kind of went through the motions at the gym and I'm kind of going through the motions at work as well.
I'm tired of working hard and not getting anwhere. I try to stay upbeat, but today its not going to happen.
I eat less than 1200 calories a day, every day. I work out every day at least once (elliptical, weights, water aerobics or a combination), every day. Today I put on a size 22 skirt that fit before the surgery, and it fits now.
Nice. I'm just fed up with this. I must be one of those people that don't lose weight no matter what. Maybe 50 is too old to do this.
I have a fill set for Monday, but seriously, what good will that do? I don't eat any carbs and my calories aren't out of whack for losing at least 2 lbs a week.
I'll let the doctor decide Monday I guess. Until then I think I'm gonna lay off the working out and get some rest.
I'm not getting enough sleep and its starting to affect my emotions, reactions and even my motivation.
I get home at 7:30 at night and still have to eat and do miscellaneous stuff before I go to bed. But I get up at 4 - 4:30 so I can do the elliptical, cool off (important piece) and get ready for work to leave by 6:30. I laid back down this morning and skipped the elliptical. I was just too tired. Instead of eating breakfast I grabbed a slim fast and drank it in the car.
Gonna try to spend some time this weekend figuring out how to make it a little better, somehow.
At least its Thursday! The weekend is almost here :-). Have a great day everybody.
Had another great week - 3.4 lbs. I eat solids and am doing pretty well. I exercise 6 days a week but I have to drink more water.
I feel good about this loss and the fact that I went out to lunch three times this week and made really good choices and logged everything very carefully. I'm only hungry at night and I'm going to work on a plan to have a small snack while I'm making that 47 mile trek home -- a protein bar, definitely water, something. Otherwise I tend to overeat when I get home and then go straight to bed -- not a long term winning combination!
Off to the gym and a personal training session. I can't do anything core or lower body, but I want to go over the upper body routine again because I can't seem to make it work on my own yet.
My first fill is the 28th and I feel I'm being successful changing habits and managing hunger (although that starvation stomach thing is still noisy lol) pretty well. I hope this bodes well for continued success after the fill!
Have a great day everybody!
:thumbup:I didn't sleep all that well but I am organized that's for sure. I have everything ready for coming home and spending a couple days just resting and recuperating. My surgery is at noon, but I'm leaving to be at the center at 9:30 for a 10:00am checkin. Its only 3 hours away.
Had some time so I decided to keep a pictoral journal of this journey.
Loving life!
I am in a place where how my clothes fit means everything to my happiness for the day. I put on a pair of pants that was baggy before surgery and they are actually tighter now (4 weeks later) than they were then. Nice.
I work out hard. I have little if any restriction, but my "cheating" consists of eating 1200 calories a day of good foods instead of 1000.
The car dealer hasn't called me back about the damage they did to it during an overnight stay. I shouldn't have to keep tracking them down. My trainer raised their rates a lot, and I won't be able to afford her for much longer. My family is getting tired of me talking about my new life. I'm tired.
I guess I should have gone back to bed and tried to get up on the other side...........
I'm attaching the three recipes from the support group healthy eating cooking class on Monday. Enjoy!
Next year I'll be able to say I'm no longer dependent on airplane seat extenders, shopping at Lane Bryant, and not being able to go on roller coaster rides.
This year, 6 weeks in, I'm no longer dependent on food as my primary source of focus during the day. I'm no longer dependent on needing three minutes to recover from walking up a flight of stairs. And no longer dependent on worrying about my feet swelling and my blood pressure.
That is a good feeling. However, at the base of all this is the fact that I live in a country where people fought and died to allow me to enjoy those lifestyle changes, and I'm grateful for living here in USA.
We are watching fireworks over Coronado on the Navy Base in San Diego. Beautiful day full of picnics, games, beach and awesome fireworks. Have a great day!
Yesterday I made lunch for myself and a couple co-workers. I might not have ate enough as I'm watching the fill and taking it easy. Ate around 11:30 and didn't eat again before going to the gym at 5.
Got on the elliptical and started kicking it up. I am off my bp medications and I can get my heart rate into target with a little effort, so I was working pretty hard. About 30 minutes into a 45 minute workout I got really hot, sweaty and a little dizzy. My stomach was GROWLING. Loud. I stopped, took several sips of water, and kept going.
I got off at 45 and I was downright dizzy. I sat in a chair along the wall for about 20 minutes before I was able to get up and walk to the car. Then I waited about an hour to meet a friend for dinner. Headache, dizzy, not good.
I need to pack more snacks and protein, and try to eat more at a single setting. I'm pretty sure I had a cup of food at lunch, but working out on an empty stomch didn't go well. Iget all my protein in for the day, so I am missing something somewhere.
I was still a little lightheaded this morning, and skipped the gym. Brought some fruit, tuna snacks and deli turkey to work. If I'm going to work out I am going to have to eat more than 1000 calories a day for sure.
If anybody has any suggestions, please let me know. I did not like this feeling.
And the kicker? After the fill Monday and fun Tuesday? I have what feels to be less restriction now (at 5.5ccs) than before the fill (at 4.0 ccs). And next fill can't be until 8/6. Ish.
Did you guys every play that game in the car? I was thinking about it driving home tonight. Random thoughts:
I have changed so much in the past nine months. A lot on the outside, to be sure, but just as much inside. Setting and working toward healthy goals has helped me in SO MANY WAYS. My energy and self confidence have enabled me to make some changes in my behavior -- reactions, enthusiasm, ability to work harder and smarter -- that mean my professional and personal lives are on a happier track than they were before.
I wore a size LARGE shirt today. Me. 3X Woman in a misses large! And I walked by a mirror this afternoon and happened to see a side view. Wow! I have a figure! I'm not Jabba the Hut anymore! I have cheekbones?! A neck! And ONE chin?!
In traffic, I just thought about this and said a prayer, thanking God for the many blessings I've had since making the decision to have LAP-BAND® in late December. I am so blessed.
I know who I am: a Christian bandster looking forward to decades of health, peace and happiness!
I try not to blog every day anymore. Its been 3 1/2 months since my surgery and honestly things don't change much day-to-day regarding my eating, exercise, health. I've successfully overcome most of the habit and emotional changes and enjoy immensely feeling TREMENDOUSLY better every morning when I get up.
I'm 51 (almost 52). I seriously feel better than I did at 40.
My only complaints in life are related to my job, and not really any there, either. I'm grateful to have a good job and a paycheck that gives me freedom to enjoy doing the things I do.
I do a lot more than I used to socially. I'm going to Marketing meetings in Orange County, volunteering with church, more social stuff with friends. I don't stay home much.
I attribute the attitude, the energy, the emotions with the band and the changes I've made since deciding to be banded in January 2010. Its becoming more of the usual lifestyle and less thinking about banding.
I never dreamt 9 months ago I would be where I am. I've lost half of the weight I want to lose, and a big part of the hangups I had associated with how I felt about myself. I'm still obese; but I'm truly at peace.
On to the next chapter :-). Smiling all the way..........
Went to a support group meeting at the doctor's facility last night -- healthy eating -- the presenter cooked veggie chili, murstard maple baked chicken thighs and apple cinnamon muffins. Everything was easy and fantastic. Even brought home some chili leftovers for lunch today. Also met some fellow bandsters and talked shop which was nice.
Got up at 4 again to leave at 4:30 for the gym. Thought I'd be smart and go a different way and I got lost so I was a little late. Got in weight training and a little cardio so its all good.
My stomach growls so loud in the morning everybody can hear it. It growls differently before and after I eat my breakfast, but it makes noise nonetheless. Even though I'm hungry a lot I don't give in to that much but instead choose larger protein filled meals and a couple jello or popsicle snacks. I feel good.
Except for the swelling. I think I'm going to have to take a couple days off at the gym and see if it helps. Stomach is still swelling 4 weeks post op. Not horrible, but its swollen.
Have a good Tuesday! Hugs!
:thumbup:
The working out is going really well. I have a workout buddy who is a friend from work and she is a runner and very motivating.
Last night after work I did 45 on the Elliptical and got to 3 miles. I was happy with that.
Then we did upper body and cardio this morning at 5:15 am. Rocked it again, but I'm doubtful I will be able to walk by the end of the day lol.
I can't do lower body or core yet -- doctor said to wait for 6-8 weeks post op so I have at least a couple weeks left. I have a fill Monday so I'll check on that Monday.
Eating is going really well even though I don't have much restriction.
My stomach is making a lot of noise today! There are days I'm really hungry and days I'm not. This is going to be a hungry day!
My pants are needing alterations today. I have on a big fluffy shirt so it hides the safety pins. This is a two safety pin day lol.
Have a great day everybody!
Spent the day yesterday shopping for groceries, scales, locker room supplies etc for this new lifestyle. The exercise walking back and forth to the car was more than I used to do in a day!
Went to a great service with friends and actually went out to dinner afterwards. Really had fun and never made any drama about the surgery, or the lifestyle. I felt pretty good about just living and eating within my boundaries. That will be a focus at work as well -- making sure I'm prepared to be away from home all day but also shifting the focus away from my "diet" and weight loss and back to work!
Need to get a couple more things today and pack the car to bring back all the stuff from work.
Tired. I woke up at the same time I have to get up for work (4:30) and I'm already tired! I wish I didn't have to work, but that isn't a reality LOL. Maybe next year I'll try to find something closer to home.
Have a beautiful day everyone!
My dad passed away seven years ago already. He wasn't much to celebrate -- he worked, worked out and fished for most of the years between 50 and 65.
Its going to be another busy day. I think my company should officially declare Friday a weekend day so I can get more done on the weekends LOL.
Ate more yesterday than I do during the week. Funny how now "more" means 1200 calories. Six months ago "more" was probably 3500 calories? And at that I didn't go anywhere or do anything on Sundays. Certainly did not go on the Elliptical or (heaven forbid) a gym.
At the end of week 3 here. I'm getting into a routine with eating, journaling food and exercise, walking more, exercising, fitting errands into the days. There are times when I know I need a fill, but I'm not really ever not following the program. I've gotten some yummy recipes and am enjoying learning new foods.
The lifestyle is replacing the old one. Not a temporary change, but a lifetime replacement.
Have a wonderful day with fathers and friends :-)
First, I want to say how much I appreciate everybody's support and feedback yesterday. I have truly found support here and I can't communicate enough how much that means to me.
I realize I am happy and sad at the same time. This week, since I'm newly filled and very restricted, I'm not really eating any solids and I think although I'm excited to be getting closer to the sweet spot, I'm depressed because I'm so USED to chewing and eating and not having to take so much longer to eat. I am mourning my old habits, in a strange way!
I weighed today at the gym, as every Saturday. I'm overjoyed at the weight loss, and excited by the fact I can exercise, climb stairs, enjoy being active more than I have in a long, long time. I have fun working out, and even more fun feeling good when the workout is over. I'm not sad to give up sitting on the couch or playing farmville for hours lol.
I mailed off three suits I sold on EBay this week -- the first of many sets of beautiful clothes I've accumulated over the last five years. Again, happy they don't fit, sad to see them go.
I wouldn't trade where I am in this banding journey for anything. I look forward to shopping for new clothes next spring, and feeling even better every day.
Thanks for listening. I'll try to be there for all of you any time you need me.
- Sandy -
I knew what to do, I knew how to do it. One day after a great fill knowing what I needed to eat and how. Did I? NO!
I got called into a 7 am meeting last night, and I was prepared. I brought a Slim Fast for an easy breakfast, and put it in the freezer at 7, because my meeting would be over at 8.
At 9:30, STARVING, I called a break even though it wasn't my meeting. I ran over to the other building where I found my shake frozen solid. Reaching into my every-prepared lunch bag for backup, I encountered some deli turkey. I kind of downed it fast. I ran back over to the other building and sat down as the meeting reconvened. TROUBLE.
The deli meat might not have been chewed too well. It stuck right there in my chest and I started to gurgle! My boss was sitting next to me giving me these funny looks. I excused myself and walked around for about five minutes and felt better.
Lesson: the best laid plans......... AND no matter what, don't swallow ANYTHING whole!
I went to bed last night saying those words to myself. I'm not weighing on Saturdays anymore -- if it isn't good I can't stop myself from overeating (yet) and if it is good I can't stop myself from celebrating (yet).
Weekdays are better -- I'm working and farther from food. It doesn't mean I won't eat, just not as much as I did yesterday. And tomorrow is my fill so at the least I'll get some advice and at the best -- some restriction.
I'll muddle through the day -- exercising and maybe getting some soon. I'm watching season 1 of True Blood and I'll get through an episode as I'm on my elliptical this morning.
I ate twice as many calories yesterday as the day before. The big bad one? A bag of Ralph's (Kroger) popcorn. The WHOLE bag.:thumbup:
I'll try to stay away from the kitchen today as much as I can. But its Sunday and my day to do stuff around the house, so I'm pushing myself.
UGGGGGGH. This is no one's fault but mine. No band, weather, scale, doctor, fill, nothing. Weekends will be difficult for me and I need to develop healthier ways to deal with them.
Have a good day everybody!
I went back to work 2 weeks after my surgery. It was a great week that week -- everyone oohed and aahed over my baggy clothes and my skinny face, and my workout routine was formed with a friend from work who was my primary source of motivation and my "workout buddy".
We would work out together every day during the week. I drove up from my house, leaving at 4 am to get up to the gym by work by 5, work out and get ready and get to work by 7:30 or 8. She even brought me breakfast sandwiches (she would go home to get ready for work).
Then came a three day weekend. I did a lot of working out at my gym near my home, but she didn't, and she fell out of the routine. Since then she flaked on me every day this week. She won't talk about it and finds excuses and I can't say anything to motivate her.
I'm sad. It was more fun, less of a task, more challenging to work with her and I realize I have to do this on my own. I'm going to talk to her one more time today when she gets to work and if it seems like its not going to work out I'm going to "re-route" my thinking and my workouts to do them from the home gym instead.
Its early in the stages of my band, and I don't want to get off track so soon. I was already in a funk yesterday because I can't get a second fill until 8/6 (first one was 6/28), and I'm gonna need another one before then!
:confused:Thanks for letting me vent!
