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Blog 85870

A blog by Jilly29

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So.....

.....this is what they call "Bandster Hell". I have officially entered and it is definitely hell. The hunger pains are here in full force. It took about 6 days. I was good on Saturday until it hit evening. The fluids are just not enough. You don't really understand what this is like until it hits you and when it hits, its all at once and doesn't go away until the next phase!! I just want to scream and cry....actually, I have done both. So, I am hungry. I am trying to figure out if its head hunger and I really don't think it is. Easter was HARD yesterday (BTW: Hope all had a good holiday!). I had to drink my chicken broth and watch everyone else chow down. Hard when I am very hungry. Very emotional day. So, i called my doctors office today to moan about my hunger pains, my emotional pains and my head pains. The woman I talked to was sooo nice and very supportive and told me all kinds of nice things to do to help keep my mind off of food. Told me to look at the big picture, about how great I am going to look and feel, etc. But, no eating until my next appointment (April 9). 4 more days. I can do it. I know she has heard it all before but i really appreciate how nice and supportive she was. This is really taking everything out of me. I have never been told not to eat! I am actually scared to cheat. I can't cheat. I have gone this far. I will only be disappointed in myself. Plus, if I cheat and everything goes down nicely, whats the reason i won't cheat again? So, in good news, i have lost 9 pounds since surgery bringing my weight to 202. It doesn't feel like i have lost all this weight though. It could be because i am still swollen where the incisions are and my stomach is bloated. I have an appointment with the surgeon tomorrow to check them out so hopefully she can tell me when to expect to feel normal again! I am off to eat some more jello.

April 5, 2010

6

Last Meal Syndrome & The Scale

Anybody else have this prior to surgery?? I have been on the Atkins diet for about a month. I lost 10 pounds on it and totally deprived myself of carbs. Now that i have my surgery date this coming Monday (3.29) i have gone off the diet and can't stop thinking about food! Its incredible. I keep using the excuse that I might not ever get to eat and enjoy this stuff so i want it now! I got on the scale this morning after a weekend of eating and drinking and I was up 2 pounds! Can't keep this up! Speaking of the scale... I also realized that i was excited to get on the scale when I am dieting and i think i am going to see a lower number. But, this morning, i had to make myself get on it and see the damage i did. I never did that in the past, hence contributing to my weight gain. Getting on that scale, facing the consequences is making me think more before i shove bad food into my mouth. I am reminded of how hard i worked for the past month to get the pre-op weight off and here i am spoiling it in one week! Yes folks, i am able to gain massive amounts of weight in an extremely short amount of time. I need to shape up and get my head back in the game. Start making better choices and keeping it up. I have also come to realize that after surgery, i will be obsessed with that scale. I will have to try and limit myself to step on it just once a day when I wake up. I could drive myself crazy! Oooohhh, I can't wait for the big day!!

March 23, 2010

5

Amazing

I think that its just amazing that having lost over 25 pounds since starting this whole journey, i still cringe at looking at pictures of me. I mean, 25 pounds is a lot of weight! Its my 2 year old to be exact. I had my big 30 birthday party last weekend and i thought i looked damn good. I had on a new dress (in a smaller size), new shoes, and all new jewelry. I felt good until I saw the pictures. Ughhh. Oh well. I have had 3 fills thus far making it 5.5 cc's. I go for my next this Tuesday. Hopefully I will be up to 6 CC's at that point. I haven't really experienced anything of restriction although I did PB for the first time last week on a piece of pita bread. Weirdest feeling ever. So glad I was home! Weight as of this morning: 196.5. Sllloooowly creeping downward. Its a lot slower than I thought but thats mainly my own fault for not following the rules to a tee. I started a boot camp class a couple of weeks ago. Its 3 mornings a week for about 45 minutes. Feels good! Hopefully it will help tone up my jiggly parts!!

June 16, 2010

5

Surgery Date booked!

I am sooo excited! First, I have lost 10 pounds since being on the Atkins diet. Go me! I am now down to 209. I had my surgeon appointment and my medical clearance appointment this week. Surgeon appointment was a breeze. I chose to go with the Lap Band brand, we discussed where the port will go and what to expect day of and day after surgery. Then the next day i met with the clearance doctor. We went over all my test results, she felt my abdomen, checked my breathing then said, "let's get you a date! You are ready!". I couldn't believe it. I followed her to the insurance woman and she looked over my file, suggested a date and said she would call me tomorrow for my next appointments. So, I am scheduled for March 29th! Can't believe its just around the corner. Makes everything soooo real. I have to do all my last minute shopping for food and supplies and also do the Easter shopping for my little munchkins this week! I am just so relieved to have an end date and a new beginning in sight. I am ready!

March 19, 2010

5

Psych Appt.-Whose the crazy one?

So today I had my mandatory Psych Evaluation. Total waste of my time, but had to do it for insurance reasons. Fine. They should at least hire someone who knows what they are talkign about. This guy was trying to find the reasons why I am heavy. "There has too be something behind your eating" he says to me. Ummmm, yeah, I love food. Duh. I am not an emotional eater, i dont eat when I am bored, i don't have stress in my life to speak of..... I love to eat and when I do, i eat the wrong things and too much of them. End of story. I love food. Now, through this awesome website and reading different blogs, i have a complete understanding that things must and will change in my eating habits and I am starting now on these changes. The cabinets and refrigerator are cleaned out. I have started the Atkins diet (very strictly) to lose the weight before surgery. I have even started working out again. I tell this knowledgable Psychologist all this and he still wants to get behind why I am obese. Then...at the end of the appointment, he wants me to pay him my co-pay. He says he will accept cash or check made out to himself. HA!! I laughed and told him to look for the check in the mail. Unbelievable!

February 19, 2010

5

Feeling better!

So, after my miserable HUNGRY blog i am feeling better!! Monday afternoon the hunger pains started to go away and my mood lifted a little. I am not sure why. I didn't do anything different. I haven't been that hungry since. I have been trying to stay more positive and thinking about the future and how great I am going to feel. Its starting to get warm here in New England and I tried on a few Capri's that were too tight last year and they fit! That has made a big difference in my mood. So, being 8 days post op, this is what I am eating: Water, diluted juice, jello, SF Popsicles, chicken broth, and 3 protein shakes with Calorie Countdown fat free milk. I did get a really good tip from Janet to add saltine crackers in the broth for a little something extra. I haven't done it yet but if the hungry horrors return, i will! Weight wise, I am down 10 pounds since surgery date (March 29). I am very pleased with this and I just hope it continues. I started this journey at 224. I did the Atkins diet to lose the required weight for surgery. Pre-Op I weighed in at 211. Today the scale said 201. Doing pretty well. Pain wise, i have next to none. I am a little sore where the port is and thats about it. I have no complaints. My surgeon did tell me to put Vitamin E on my scars to help fade them. I haven't heard of that one yet but I started it this morning. I have my dietitian meeting on Friday where I learn about the 2nd stage of this process and graduate to pured/mushies. Can't wait! I am craving refried beans, chili, applesauce, yogurt, etc. Only 2 more days. I can make it. So far so good. I haven't regretted my decision and I can't wait to see where this band takes me!! Hope all is well with the rest of you all out there!!

April 7, 2010

4

Today is the day!

I am going under the knife today at 1:30 to be a Bandster! Ohhhh the anxiety I am dealing with right now. Not at the thought of doubt, but just pure nerves of being in surgery. I am ready though! Bags are packed, house is cleaned, kids are being taken care of. Ready! So, my next post will be after I am home and recovering. I will check back then!!

March 29, 2010

4

2.16.2009-Starting Out

Okay, i have decided to try blogging about my LAP-BAND®® experience so I can remember where I started out, what I have gone through, what works and doesn't work and just for memory sake! My weight problems started back in the 3rd grade for me. I have fought weight my whole life. When i got married back in 2003, i was at 160 pounds. Not too thin but bearable. Since then, i have had 2 kids and ballooned up. I have tried all the crazy diets and pills. Even illegal ones that worked until i stopped taking them. Crazy and I have had enough. I have a family history of obesity and without some sort of help, i will continue in that category as well. I have thought about the band for the last year or so and went to an introductory meeting on January 5th, 2010. I took all the info, brought it home, discussed with the Hubs and family and decided to go for it with both feet in. I had my first official appointment on January 27th. I weighed in at 224 pounds. Ughhhh. My highest yet. Because I am only 5'2", i am over the 40 BMI and qualify for insurance purposes. I filled out the paperwork, talked with the nurse and made all my appointments. Here we go! My next appointments are as follows: 2.18-Psych evaluation Cardiac Echo 2.19-Blood work 2.23-Support Group 3.01-Dietitian Apt 3.09-Support Group 3.16-Surgeon Apt. (Hopefully I will get my surgery date) 3.23-Support Group I have read many successful blogs and it has me really excited. So, on January 27th, i weighed in at 224 pounds. Today, I am down to 219. My presurgery weight goal is 213.5 pounds. I started the Atkins diet yesterday, since that has been the most successful and quickest diet for me in the past. With a little bit of exercise thrown in, i should have no problem losing the last 6 pounds. My ultimate goal weight is 150 pounds.

February 17, 2010

4

Day 6 Post-Op

Just checking in. Today marks day 6 with being banded and i have lost a total of 7.5 pounds since Monday! My weight this morning is 203.5. I cannot believe it! I am strictly on fluids and got the okay to start protein shakes yesterday. I was told to drink 1 ounce every 15 minutes of the shake. I thought this was a minimum because i was able to drink the whole 4 ounces pretty much at once. BIG mistake. I suddenly got all bloated and gassy for the first time. I was extremely uncomfortable. I still am actually. So today, i have been doing what is instructed. One thing I have noticed.... I can't burp. I have the urge to but it never comes all the way up and out. Anyone else experience this?? It weird. I am still pretty sore in the port area. I am actually taking a bit of pain medicine for it. Having 2 little toddlers is definitley a challenge after surgery. I have a hard time bending over to pick stuff up. I was fixing them lunch and popped a piece of pasta in my mouth without even thinking about it! I quickly spit it out after I realized what I just did! I will have to say I am not hungry yet. The liquids are still satisfying and they will have to be until April 9th. Thats when I have my appointment to start pured foods. I hope i can last till then! I am just surprised on the amount of energy I have on really no calories. Its weird. So far so good though!

April 3, 2010

4

Atkins Diet-Day 6

I have successfully completed 5 days on an extremely strict Atkins diet to lose the pre-op weight. On Monday i weighed 219. This morning i was surprised to see 216.5 on the scale. I guess its working. Only 4 more pounds to go! I will be honest... these past 5 days has been all about food. I have been really hungry, tracking everything i eat on Sparkpeople.com and working out (only twice). I am guessing this is what its going to be like with the band as well. I have been trying to practice not drinking while eating but this diet is way to salty for me to be successful at that. I am worried about the drinking part when it comes down to me having to do it. I will, because i know its the right way to lose the most weight, but its going to be hard. I went to do all my testing yesterday at the hospital. Blood work, X-Rays, EKG, Ultrasound to look t my organs. Took 3 hours and i couldn't eat. I was already hungry going to bed the night before, woke up with hunger pains and just about passed out doing the EKG and drinking the barium. At least that part is over, one step closer to surgery, which i still don't even have a date yet. When do you get a date?? I haven't met with the nutritionist yet. Thats March 1st. Maybe then? I really can't wait to get this procedure done and over with. What a long road to lead up to it. I know it will be all worth it. I am so impressed by all the blogs I have been reading and all the success! Good work bandsters! Can't weight to join you! :redface:

February 20, 2010

3

2nd Stage Update

So, just a quick post on how I am doing with the 2nd stage of this journey. This is my 6th day on pured/mushy foods. So far I have been satisfied. I feel good, have energy and no emotional breakdowns like I had on liquids. This is what I am eating: 1/4 cup of pured foods 3 times a day. I eat it VERY slowly over a 20-30 minute time frame. No drinking 15 minutes before and I wait 1-1.5 hours after I finish eating to drink again. I also have 3 protein shakes a day with Calorie Countdown Fat Free milk. So far my go to foods are oatmeal, refried beans with cheese and salsa and canned chicken. Thats seriously all I have been eating. I need to change it up a bit! Very boring, i know. I have also stepped up my exercising as I am feeling back to normal. I seriously don't feel like I have had surgery. Everything has healed nicely and I have been using vitamin E on my incisions, which seems to be working. As of this morning, i am down to 199.5 pounds! Thats a total of 11.5 pounds lost since surgery on March 29th. I am fitting into my older clothes and feeling a lot better about myself. Now, i have 50 pounds to go!

April 14, 2010

3

Banded-day 4

Just a quick update. Today is day 4 and the pain is noticably less. I was able to sleep alot better and longer without waking up from pain from the insicions. This is what I am doing: Taking multiple deep breaths to open up my lungs. I was told this would also help with gas pains??? I am also walking laps around my house whenever I can. As a result, I have had NO gas pains at all. I also jumped on the scale this morning and I am down to 208! That is a 3 pound loss since Monday. I am on clear liquids until tomorrow. Then I can add in 3 protein shakes a day until my dietician appointment on April 9th. I am not hungry at all and the fluid is satisfying. Shocking. I know it wont last long. So, taking deep breaths, walking alot and getting in enough fluids had really made this process easier than expected. I just can't wait to add in protein now!

April 1, 2010

3

Slacking and First Fill

Its been quite a while since I last posted and thats partly because I didn't want to own up to my bad eating habits! Yikes! Accountability is huge and its time I start realizing it. Towards the end of my 2nd stage of pured foods, i graduated myself to solids. I discovered I could eat anything and everything and I did. I have been on such a strict diet to lose the pre-op weight and then having the surgery and doing liquids and then mush, i went crazy on solids. No more folks! I had my first fill yesterday. I stepped on the scale and saw 204. Now, i had no idea where i was weight-wise because i also avoided the scale. 204 is not acceptable. Weird thing is that I stepped on the scale today and saw 199. So, with the fills, i have to be on fluids for 24 hours and then can start slowly back into solids. I have to follow all the band rules to the T. Today i have had a protein shake and thats it. I am now just starting to get hungry. I can feel the liquid going down. A weird feeling. Back on track! I am going to start following the rules, taking smaller bites, choosing better foods and up my exercising. I need to get that scale moving.

May 12, 2010

2

Lets get this show on the road already!

Can you say impatient??? Thats what I am. I have always been the kind of person that when my mind is made up, i go out and get it or do it. I can't wait for things at all. I have been lap band obsessed, especially since i found this website and all the blogs associated with it. I read, study, take notes, write down recipes, talk about it, dream about everything Lap band! Its crazy. So today, i tried to move up my surgeon appointment. Its scheduled for the 16th of March and apparently thats where it stays. The surgeon needs some time to get the results of my tests and assess my progress. From there, my paperwork will be submitted to the insurance company for final review. Who knows how long that will take. I am sooo inspired by all the success of all of you. Hopefully I will be able to have the surgery at the end of March. Seems so far away. At least my kitchen remodel will hopefully occupy my mind. For now I wait.

February 22, 2010

2

Day 14- Atkins and Dietician Appt.

Well, today marks day 14 on an extremely strict Atkins diet of eating 20 or less of net carbs. I am happy to report I have lost 6.5 pounds! My surgery weight needs to be at 213.5 and I am now at 212.5. So proud of myself. It hasn't been easy at all but I feel good that i am getting a good jump start on making sure i eat protein first and then veggies. My hunger is down, my face looks thinner and my clothes are a bit more comfortable. I am going to stick to the phase 1 portion for 1 more week then move on to phase 2 next week. So, I met with my dietitian today and we went over all thats expected after surgery. I was pleased to know that i will have no pre-surgery diet since my weight is down to where it needs to be. I brought my food journals like she asked and even did the 2 day "mushies" diet like she requested, which was not easy being on the Atkins diet! She said I was her star patient. I was pretty pleased with that. I just did what she asked me to do before meeting with her. I did find out that I will get a surgery date when I meet with my surgeon (March 16). I can't wait. I have finished everything except the 2 last support groups that insurance requires. Fingers crossed for the end of March. My first pre-op hurtle: I had an all girls party last Saturday where my friends and I got together to have drinks and food. I was really worried about this and thought about not going so I could avoid all the food. Then I realized i needed to go for my own sake and sanity. I can't hide from these social events. I need to go out and embrace them and be strong. So, i decided not to drink so I wouldn't give into the temptation easier. There were sooo many goodies and all the stuff i love like chips and dip, ziti, cookies, etc. I ate before I went and sipped my water all night. I made it through successfully but it wasn't easy. My friends are so used to me drinking and eating along with them, that of course I stuck out like a sore thumb. First question: Are you pregnant? Thats a huge negative. So, i told a couple of the girls and it was nice to talk with them and get their support. I have decided to tell people about my choice of WLS and I am not regretting it yet. I have had a lot of support and I know I will need it to make me be successful on this journey. So now, I continue to diet and exercise and wait for March 16th.

March 1, 2010

2

I made it!

Well, i am officially banded. Still hasn't sunk in yet. The surgery went smoothly. I remember being wheeled into the OR, talking to the nurses and doctors then the mask was placed over my nose and that was it. I woke up in recovery and was told everything went perfectly. I couldnt drink anything the whole rest of the day. I did have a pain pump that helped alot with the incision pain. Tuesday am i went for a barium swallow to make sure everything was doing well then i was given a tray full of liquids: tea, broth, jello, popcicle and water. I couldn't wait to dig in! Suprisingly i was hungry, just really thirsty. So, today marks day 3. I am definitley in more pain in the stomach area. No gas pains yet. I am sure they will come. Drinking fluids is really satifying. I am suprised on that. i have been taking laps around the house and that really seems to help loosen things up. So, in summery, everything well and the only pain i have is from the incisions. I am still bloated and up 2 pounds from before surgery. I hear days 3-5 are the worst?? I will keep you posted. Good luck to everyone that is scheduled this week!

March 31, 2010

2

Getting closer and I can't wait!

So, I have successfully completed 3.5 weeks on the Atkins diet and still going. I started the diet at 219 and now I am at 210. Amazing! It hasn't been easy but it worked and now I am well past my surgery weight. I will have to say I am SICk of this diet. I am bored and i think of cheating all the time. I wonder if this is how its going to be with the band. It scares me. I haven't strayed from this strict eating yet but I feel it coming soon. There is only so much I can take. I am working on head hunger/cravings. I drink Crystal Light whenever I want something sweet. Its working so far...... So next week is a big week for me. I meet with the surgeon on the 16th and then I have my last appointment with the Medical Dr. for clearance on the 17th. I was told after that they submit my paperwork for insurance approval. I am so ready. Reading everyones blogs has got me inspired and I can't wait to see how this is going to work for me.

March 10, 2010

1

2nd Stage Here I come!

So, I had the long awaited dietitian appointment today to learn about the 2nd stage foods of this process. We also talked about head hunger verses real hunger and dealing with appetite (mind) and hunger (stomach). Really interesting and informative. We as lap band people have a lot to deal with, realize and change. I mean, with this 2nd stage, they want me to start off by eating 1/4 cup of pured food 3 times a day. My head is telling me that that is not enough food!! But in fact, it should be for the new stomach size. We will see how it goes. Also, this stage starts the no drinking 15 minutes before I start eating and wait 1 hour after I finish eating to drink again. Plus, they want me to take 20-30 minutes to finish my mini-meal. So, I came home and made oatmeal. Easiest and fastest thing I had on hand. I dutifully measured out the 1/4 cup of oatmeal, looked at the clock and began taking tiny bites. I took the full 30 minutes to finish and was actually thinking by the last 10 minutes that I wasn't even that hungry and questioning whether or not to finish. Well, I finished all but 2 bites of the 1/4 cup and waited my 1 hour to have a drink. It felt goooood to get something of a solidish consistency in my mouth! I really enjoyed the oatmeal. Its been 2 hours and I am still satisfied. Not so bad.Now, I have 20 days of this stage before I move on to solids!! A couple of things that might make things easier that I learned through this site and blogs is to have little bowls and baby/kid utensils. It looks like a lot more food when placed in a smaller container and the bites have to be small when eating off a small spoon! Oh...and i am now down 10.5 pounds since surgery (March 29). Still losing but just a lot slower. I am going to have to pick up the exercising now that more calories are going in.

April 9, 2010

1

2.16.2010

Okay, i have decided to try blogging about my LAP-BAND® experience so I can remember where I started out, what I have gone through, what works and doesn't work and just for memory sake! My weight problems started back in the 3rd grade for me. I have fought weight my whole life. When i got married back in 2003, i was at 160 pounds. Not too thin but bearable. Since then, i have had 2 kids and ballooned up. I have tried all the crazy diets and pills. Even illegal ones that worked until i stopped taking them. Crazy and I have had enough. I have a family history of obesity and without some sort of help, i will continue in that category as well. I have thought about the band for the last year or so and went to an introductory meeting on January 5th, 2010. I took all the info, brought it home, discussed with the Hubs and family and decided to go for it with both feet in. I had my first official appointment on January 27th. I weighed in at 224 pounds. Ughhhh. My highest yet. Because I am only 5'2", i am over the 40 BMI and qualify for insurance purposes. I filled out the paperwork, talked with the nurse and made all my appointments. Here we go! My next appointments are as follows: 2.18-Psych evaluation Cardiac Echo 2.19-Blood work 2.23-Support Group 3.01-Dietitian Apt 3.09-Support Group 3.16-Surgeon Apt. (Hopefully I will get my surgery date) 3.23-Support Group I have read many successful blogs and it has me really excited. So, on January 27th, i weighed in at 224 pounds. Today, I am down to 219. My presurgery weight goal is 213.5 pounds. I started the Atkins diet yesterday, since that has been the most successful and quickest diet for me in the past. With a little bit of exercise thrown in, i should have no problem losing the last 6 pounds. My ultimate goal weight is 150 pounds.

February 16, 2010

1

Making progress, slowly but surely!

So, just a quick update to remember. I have had my 4th fill. I am up to 6cc's now and I feel great. My weight is down to 192 and it keeps going down. Boot camp three mornings a week is making a huge difference and making me want to exercise more. The restriction is great. I will say i do have trouble almost daily with either sliming and/or PB'ing. Its almost like i have the first bite syndrome. Once i get over the 1st bite, i may have to run to the bathroom. Then after I am fine to finish my meal. I eat about a cup three times a day, i have 1 protein shake and 1 greek yogurt. Thats my days and I feel great! I am off to the beach for a week and I hope to continue to exercise on my own and eat good choices. We will see!! So, lets see: Started this journey at 224. Today I am at 192. Not too bad!!

July 17, 2010

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