So year out... couple weeks over.. this time last year I was on liquids only so the spiritual fast I do every January was very easy...protein shakes and more protein smoothies.. I had been doing it for weeks prior to my surgery and just kept on it while I healed. So here we are this year... January and this year's spiritual fast is here.. no meat, no bread, no sweets. Just all natural fruits, veggies, etc... essentially vegan for a month.. NO animal products. This means alot of gluten free, wheat free and organic eating.. Oh look that was in the aftercare diet..
So now here I am eating veggies and "whole" foods, all organic and gluten free and in the 3 days (started on the 3rd) I've been doing it, I haven't had one single issue with my band, getting stuck or getting that overly full feeling sneaking up on me. Wouldn't you know that in 3 days I've lost 10lbs?!?!?!? PRAISE THE LORD.. last year I lost 42lbs on the fast but I did it for 6 or 7 weeks if you include the pre-op diet.
If I keep up at this rate for the month... Hmmmmm I'll be ALOT closer to goal...
In my prayer time, I heard to stop eating wheat, it's the gluten that keeps me fat because of my blood type. Then I went online and researched and sure enough... there it was clear as day, O blood types shouldn't eat wheat products because the gluten reacts with our bodies and we pack on pounds...
As someone who has lived most of their years on the planet eating sandwiches, hamburgers and pasta.... it ALL makes sense... either way the point to this post is.. I totally get it now and will be making these changes, and adhering to the true aftercare diet...this time next year, I'll be on a billboard... Watch!
Is what I find myself saying about food all the time almost on a daily basis!
Something that once almost ruled my life is now so far removed. I eat because I "NEED" to now instead of because I WANT to, don't get me wrong I still enjoy a DELICIOUS meal and cooking but prior to my surgery I never understood how people could say "Oh I forgot about that" when it came to food.
Like bringing in something like donuts or mcdonalds to work, the people who take a bite or don't even open it and just leave it on their desk for the day. I would always say something to them in a joking manner to let them know um HEY it's there and YOU need to eat it!
But now I'm that person. I don't get it, but I am. Food no longer rules me and it's SO liberating. I keep finding things in my bag that people have given me like candy, chips, snack bars, etc... I just throw it in my bag and days later I'm like "Oh yeah..."
Yesterday I was at a festival and I didn't go to ANY of the food booths *GASP*, even the one vendor who was giving away FREE cake.. yeah I know.. CAKE.. and I LOVE CAKE.. This morning, I woke up a lil' hungry and was like MAN I FORGOT ABOUT THAT CAKE!!!! lol
It feels SO good, so so good to just be you and not you with food. To be able to eat a few bites and put something up and know it's ok if you want more it's there if not, that's ok too. I spent so much of my life consuming food while it was obviously consuming me. This is just AMAZING! So glad I did this for myself!
Starbursts do not count as "Gummies".
Pasta especially covered in cheesey fattening goodness, in even a small bite or two are NOT your friend.
Sugar cookies dissolve in your mouth before you even realize you put one in there and you're REALLY not supposed to be eating them.
No those ghirardelli chocolate and caramel squares will not just melt and slide...
Christmas parties and potlucks are the devil when you're a day short of being a week out of surgery.
All of the above results in gas, and gas pains coming back even though you've been pain free for a week.
Today I will do liquids all day, until dinner and then I will be VERY VERY VERY careful and then go back on to liquids to repair any damage I did last night... UGH...
So being banded 12/18/09 I've been doing great, restriction, loosing weight, feeling great and still able to eat bread, rice, etc...
My last fill on the 5th I went very aggressive as much as my dr. was willing to put in 1.5 ccs and I FINALLY felt true restriction...
They say it takes about 2 weeks to be able to tell what your fill really did...
So this morning... I decided to have a turkey sandwich...I eat half of the half of the sandwich and I feel it... the BREAD.. STUCK.. trying to come back up... ICK... say it isn't so? I LOVE my bread.. love love love bread.... I did what we're not supposed to do and drank some water to help it go down but MAN... say it isn't so, what's a girl to do with out her bread?
The pounds go down on the scale...so it's been awhile since I've been on or blogged but just a quick update. I haven't had a fill since December... which was great at first then I got to the point where I was throwing up then ok then throwing up then ok... Not wanting to waste the co-pay and not get a fill I just decided to go it on my own.. Come late April/May I evidently hit my sweet spot because I've lost more weight in the last 3 months than I've lost the entire time I've had my band. I was starting to feel like I was a band failure hovering at the same weightloss since 6 months out of surgery... not really gaining, but not losing either.. or if I gained 10lbs losing it (hormonal) then just balancing out at the same range..
So now I am 1 yr 7 months out since surgery, it's been 8 months since my last fill and about 2.5 to 3 months since I hit my "sweet spot" I no longer HAVE to shop in fat girl stores, I am now able to shop in the skinny girl stores even if it's they're biggest size, it fits... So now my band is just truly giving me portion control...the way it's intended and now I'm losing losing losing.. I've also stopped weighing myself since the 1st...So I have absolutely no idea what I weigh at this point but everyone keeps telling me how I look like I've lost so much weight and I actually see the changes on an almost daily basis.
I guess I've just stopped worrying about it and just doing my best to live right and eat clean... always room for improvement and it's a process but it's getting better everyday! Hope you're all doing well.
Trying to document my progress, living alone it's hard to get full body pics, so mirrors will have to do lol... Anyways, this is just a documentation for me and those who are curious
My goal is to lose 115lbs. Maybe more, I'll see when I reach the first goal. I've successfully lost over 130lbs before and managed to keep most of it off (less the 60 I gained back). When I reached that goal I always said, eh I could lose another 50-80lbs.. Well now feeling like I'm pretty much back where I started (I'm not but it feels like it) I'm going hardcore and it all starts today.
My surgery is scheduled for 12/21, I am scheduled to start my pre-op diet on Monday. Me being gung-ho decided to get an extra week in as a way of "Easing" myself into it.
Yesterday I went and got my provisions, Protein mix, skim milk, frozen strawberries, yogurt, salad, chicken, etc....Then in a celebration of my last meal I also added some ice cream to the cart, not one but two different pints. Pint 1.) Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie. Pint 2.) Bryer's cookies & cream. Now if I could have found my all time favorite Oatmeal Cookie from B&J I would have bought two of those and gave myself foodgasms all night but alas I'll suffice with those.
I checked out and started on my way home, and some how, some how my car took a right instead of a left and I ended up in the drive- thru, just one last time. Oh golden arches how I'll miss you and our cheapy tawdry affair. You were always there for me when I needed to come by, early, late, doesn't matter you're always ready and willing to put out just the way I like it. Hot, Fast and cheap, In and out with a lil' sweetness at the end. Mmm speaking of sweetness let me get two large sweet teas one with no ice... What???That way it doesn't look like it's all for me.
Mcdouble no pickles, they just ruin your pure beefy taste, french fries oh how I love it when your hot golden salted crispy goodness enters my mouth again and again. I must admit, I get a lil' sad when you're done, something about you makes me just want to keep you in my mouth enjoying your salty goodness. Mmmm what is that delightful sweet nectar I taste? The sweet tea I wash you down with. That's right, I say as it feels like you just hit my sweet spot. Basking in the afterglow, I lay back and let it course through me like a heroin addict who just shot up.
This isn't good for me, I know I know Ronald I've said it before, but I mean it this time. No more, we have to break it off. You have no power over me. Don't look at me like that, I mean it.. I have to go. No I won't be back.. I won't and don't call me either.
Breaking up is hard to do, but they say they best way to get over a man is to get under another one. Or in this case two. Ben & Jerry fulfilling my two man chocolatey threesome fantasy yet again. Yes take me, take me..fill me OMG YES!!!! YES YES YES!!!! Wait what do you mean you're done? we just started.. it was just getting good. The two of you could never keep up with me anyways, get out!
Frustrated I wait a lil' bit, but I"m still turned on. Turned on like some sort of crazed eating machine, I set my sights on Bryers, "come here my sweet" mmmm, um oh.. um yeah.. eh, just stop. This isn't working out for us, you're not as good as I thought you would be. Just go...
A couple of hours past and that familar remorseful feeling comes over me.. WHY did I do that??? I know better.. Ugh.. Now I need a shower or something.
A couple more hours go by, the feeling doesn't pass. I comptemplate if I'm REALLY ready to change, to stop doing things that I KNOW are not good for me, and stop living to eat and start eating to live. Hmmm cucumbers and ranch sound really good right about now. Oh and maybe just these crackers.
But today, Today my friends is a new day! I will fast, be celibate and stay true to my new found relationship, even if protein shakes tastes like eggs and @ss. I've heard there's some good ones, I'll have to explore those flavors, for now I'm on these "Designer Whey" protein shakes, even with the strawberries and the vanilla extra and ice and 2 oz of skim milk added in, it still tastes awful. But I'm commited I have a goal, I've started early. I would like to drop 30lbs before the end of the year. Which should be easy for me, as the bulk of that will be water weight.
So here I am, stripped down, standing before you as my own "Before" Picture.. which I'll be taking later to commerate the start of my new life. My best life is ahead of me, and I'm going after what's mine. Life solutions, not resolutions. AMEN!
So I know it's a total overshare but when you eat something that gets stuck, I mean horribly stuck, I don't know about the rest of you but something I used to HATE absolutely HATE to do is suddenly a relief.
Last night at a dinner party of sorts, I had an epic fail of someone's chicken kabob and a cup of the tropical savory & sweet rice pudding (fully expanded in this form prior to eating) that I brought, the pudding turned out delicious and easy to go down..(yay me!) not to mention everyone LOVED it, I should so be on top chef! lol - but while I was able to avoid most of the other dishes because they were sides, I had to eat the only protein and the host's dish of Chicken Kabobs.. The kabob was dry, horribly, horribly dry. Being polite I tried to eat what I could... ugh.. 1 bite too many and the slime comes, the pain, all of that...I finally excuse myself and go home to shower...Not sure why, but I think because sliming is SO gross to me, this where I like to do it at lol. (WOW that may have been a complete overshare lol) but finally about 15 mins into the ordeal it FINALLY comes up...
Now I know why people say they can't eat things, or can't handle meats, etc... I've come to realize I need to just stick to eating things I cooked, my meats, especially chicken are never dry. How does one dry out chicken? Evidently this is a common phenomenon.. WHO KNEW?!??!?
But I now have full understanding of what people go through.. In 7 months of being banded I've only had 1 bad sliming/throw up experience, oddly enough with honeydew melon.. but after that dry chicken last night ugh! I get it.. I totally get it..
Think today will be a all smoothie day and I'll eat later tonight..
Pre-band but losing and my underwear are entirely too big. Part of me wants to go buy new ones, but then part of me is like wait, we get banded on Friday, let's see what happens after that. lol
This may be an overshare but I think it's a good problem to have.
In other news, other items of clothing and now loose and too big, my one time favorite fitted t-shirt is fitted no more.. YAY!
Well I think, on the upside I get to go shopping. On the double upside, my mother goes through periods of buying everything I buy clothing wise, soooo I can just go into her closet since she's smaller than me and keep my cute outfits LOL.. well for a few sizes anyways, until I get to a size 18, then I'll HAVE to go buy stuff. In a 22 now, so it won't be long... but either way it's still some cushion. YAY a good problem to have.
I'm constantly hungry...but that's because my metabolism is working again, YAY! Another good problem to have..
I'm sure I'll think of more, I'm hungry time for a shake..
3 weeks post-op today, I feel great, I LOVE my band :thumbup:
I went to lunch with a friend yesterday who's on the spiritual fast with me. We decided to do appetizers and salads.
I got the greek salad no olives or cheese.
He got a ceasar salad and zuccini.
Then I found on the menu what seemed like an "interesting" appetizer... Sweet corn tamale cakes. OMGOSH delicious! Like UNBELIEVABLY delicious. And as I quickly found out, may or may not be considered band friendly lol. They're mushie so they're easy to go down. However, they're corn meal/masa so I'm not sure if what I experienced was them bloating in my stomach or just all that my stoma would allow. I'm going to go with the latter because corn meal doesn't tend to "bloat".
I ate 1 and 1/2 of the cakes (shared) with the salsa, avocado and sauce toppings and I was DONE.. Like DONE DONE... I didn't even touch the greek salad. I had 2 bites left when I got that "full" feeling but I admit, old habits to finish it came up only because it tastes SO good. Sigh.. it's a battle being banded when you're a foodie, but I'm learning and recognizing more and more every day.
So me being me, am on a mission to make a healthier version of them, replacing sugar with agave nectar, butter with, I'm not sure yet because well I LIKE butter lol... but it's not on my fast.
The sauces I can do... well except the one with mayo, I gotta find a way around that one.. maybe use vegan soy mayo and see how it turns out.
As with most women, the week before my period my appetite increases and the cravings hit.
I'm two days shy of being two months post op, 2 fills down, feeling restriction and all is going well BUTTTTTTTTTTT.... Man if mother nature isn't tryin' to go 12 rounds with my band.
At my current level of restriction I'm almost never hungry. But when I do eat it's hard to stop... I've gotten so full it's almost painful because mother nature/cravings can't seem to get enough of the taste. Not the amount of food, but the taste of it.. and carbs...OMGosh CARBS.. pasta...pasta..pasta and cheese. I need to get back on track or I'm going to gain and that's SO not on the plan.
On the recent episode of Supernatural there was a guy who ate so much he burst his band... I just thought OMGOSH what if that was me.. cause when you DO eat too much it hurts.. I couldn't even imagine. I know it's overly dramatic but as I sat there watching, realizing I had eaten nothing but homemade mac & cheese for the day I let my mind drift and get wrapped up in that.. Ugh mother nature why must you treat me this way.. lol
I must be strong... every time I want to eat I should go work out... but then the cramps and ugh...
I've been having cravings for "sweet & creamy" - ice cream, blizzards etc... it doesn't help that I have a view of a dairy queen from my kitchen...
Anyways I've been doing ok... but then I remembered I make REALLY good protein shakes, I think I had just tried of the ones I was doing so I stopped doing them.
So today.. today I did banana chocolate chip.. YES chocolate chip and it was SO good.
A few chocolate chips won't hurt you and if you don't want the "extra" you can make it the same without them.
2 handfuls of ice
1 scoop each - chocolate & vanilla protein powder
8 oz of skim milk (I think I did 10, over pour)
4 table spoons of fage greek 0% yogurt
1 banana
1 table spoon of agave nectar
A small handful of chocolate chips (just the palm of your hand 10-20 chips at most).
Blend and enjoy...
So YUMMY!
If you follow my blog you know that I had an affair with Ronald under the glow of his golden arches for years. Even though I knew he wasn't good for me and I shouldn't be there, he was my old comfortable lover that knew how to do everything I liked just right.
I'll admit I've visited my old flame a couple of times since my banding mostly due to lack of time/necessity during a month long moving process with a BUSY schedule.. I know I could have made better choices but I didn't.
I came across this and now I know... WOW
Take the next 5 mins and see this below and you'll figure out how much damage we've done with every visit... never again.. NEVER AGAIN..
Anyone ever done it? I'm starting today for cleansing and weightloss purposes. I'm 10lbs from my own first personal goal and I MUST reach it by monday. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. I thought about doing the pre-op diet or the liquids pouch test diet but then I thought if I'm going to do it, I need to cleanse my body as well.
So here I am...dreading my first Salt water slam... the thought of it...ICK...
I know you can do the master cleanse for 40 days but I only intend on doing it til Monday morning before my fill appointment. I also want them to go super aggressive on my fill, since I skipped my last one, if they'll put 2 cc's in that would be good, or maybe even 1.5 cause I need one. I have days where I feel like a hungry hungry hippo and days where I want nothing at all.
I'm super sore from working out yesterday...Oh my goodness...I think it was the stretching that did me in, not even the work out lol.
It's all working and worth it, when kids tell you "Oh wow you're getting skinnier" lol gotta love the honesty of kids, especially when they keep you in check as well...as the 4 yr old says to me "Why do you always eat that?" as I'm popping something not good for me into my mouth. I stop to think, do I ALWAYS eat that? and pop it out... lol it's a great checks and balances system lol
So now I'm off to the store, need some syrup and some seasalt... here goes umm something lol:thumbup:
Ok so I've been MIA for a minute, I needed some time to think about everything that I'm going through, is this what's really right for me.
Two of the people I respect most in the world have voiced their opinions on my surgery. My mother has voiced the same and so forth. They all say the same thing "Do what you want to do, but you can do it on your own, so you don't really need to do this."
I went from 430+ down to 287. The plus is because I couldn't weigh myself for a long time before that. So I lost that weight and have kept the bulk of it off.
I got into a long distance relationship for 2 yrs and he was jealous of me going to the gym, hearing the guys make comments, saying, hi, flirting, etc...So I spent 2 yrs of my life on the phone, laying around.. and packed weight back on reaching back up to 330lbs.
I started to diet and got fed up with the up and down losing the same 30-35lbs, especially when I can gain and lose 15lbs in just a weeks time. So I decided to make yet another appointment to go see about the lapband.
I've been researching this for 5 yrs...on and off, back and forth. Listening to everyone else's opinions and thoughts on it, wait til you have kids, you can do it on your own, etc...
Thing is, I'm tired of waiting. I've been a size 14 or bigger since I was 8 yrs old. Yes 8 as in eight, not a typo.
And yes I know people look at me and they think "Oh you're not that big." fact is I am, the numbers don't lie. I'm mostly muscle and I'm solid, which is why most people guess me anywhere around 200-250lbs if they guess my weight. And I'm wide front to back, not side to side.
At my pre-op visits people always comment on how they thought I was post-op and would say things like "wow I would like to have your shape/figure when I'm done." - Umm k that's great and I appreciate the compliment. However, I'm PRE-OP.
So all of that being said, I had to take few days to get my mind right, and not be here and caught up in all of it.
My Pastor voiced his concern and doesn't think I should do it. His wife (also my Pastor) said the same. My Mother, my friends, etc...
So now I feel like I'm being forced to lie, well not lie, just not tell anyone. Which I wasn't really doing anyways. I think I told 5 or 6 people total and 4 out of those 5 or 6 have said something negative about it and tried persuade me not to do it.
So I sat and thought, ok do I really want to do this? Less than a week from surgery, do I really want to walk away from this?
I couldn't really bring it here until my mind was made up. I know there are so many people here who are waiting, trying to get approved, etc..and here I am approved, scheduled and thinking about walking away.
My mind is made up, I'll be doing it on Friday. No more, no less and more importantly nobody's business.
I'll have church on Thursday and see my Pastor, Friday is Surgery and then I'll see his wife on Sunday. I'll have friday and saturday to recoup and nobody will know the difference.
I'll see my mom Friday after surgery. She knows I'm doing it, even though she thinks I should wait she's supporting whatever it is I think I need to do. But everybody else doesn't need to know.
I'm sure some of you are like well just miss church or whatever...but I can't. I'm the church administrator and assistant to my Pastors so I have to be there. Be available to pick them up from the airport, check them into the hotel, etc..whatever needs to be done.
I'm pretty sure I can pull it off without anyone noticing, the only issue I may have is luggage, I can't lift anything over 15lbs for the next 3-4 weeks. I think I'll be ok for this week, as the only trip before the end of the year is this Sunday and she'll be coming from San Diego with just a carry on...for an hour or two... By the time I see them after the new year, I'll be healed up for the most part.
In the stress of this I ended up cheating on my pre-op diet 2 days in a row ok well more like 1.5.. sunday morning I had a bagel AND a cheese danish with a yoplait and some fruit.
Then yesterday I had supreme croissant from jack in the box with the intent of just eating the egg and meat out of the center.. yeah no, ate it all oh and tacos.. I wanted to have those greasy best thing you ever at at 2am after you've been out drinking all night tacos. But oddly enough they don't taste as good when you're sober and it's it's 12 in the afternoon lol.
Then I had the weirdest craving for chicken salad, which isn't too bad, but the box of wheat thins I ate the chicken salad on, umm yeah that was kinda bad. So anyways - that's that.. That's where I've been. But my mind is made up, I'm on track.. basically 2 more days, 3 more sleeps and it's here. WOW.
Father I thank you for the opportunity of new life, best life. I thank you for rapid recovery and healing. I thank you for a solid mind and unwaivering spirit. I thank you for all you've done for me in the past and all that you will do for me in the future. You are Alpha and Omega and I give you all the Glory. Amen.
I am so excited to be losing a pound a day! I wake up every morning anxious to step on the scale and see the numbers go down. I am 7lbs away from my lowest weight since being banded, so despite last year's set back I am NOW on track and that's all that matters. 10lbs down for the year and I started this fast on the 3rd, so that's actually a little more than a pound a day, but either way it's great!
No band issues since starting my new eating plan for the spiritual fast and I am excited to adapt this style of eating for the long run. I love to cook and I'm being challenged to come up with new and delicious veggie/vegan recipes. My Zucchini, Mushroom, Hummus pita pizzas are AMAZING and the stir frys and bakes and so on and so on.. I'm so excited for what this year is going to bring and as soon as I can figure out how to rename my blog I will to "How I lost 100lbs+" will be the documenting journey!.
Now to just work in a more routine work out schedule instead of trying to fit it in here and there when I can, it's becoming a priority, it has to!
Maybe... with YOUR support!
I have a friend and client who is a lapband patient. She's lost a ton of weight and looks fabulous. She's currently being considered for the next installment of the Real Housewives franchise: Real Housewives of Las Vegas.
She's open about everything in her life and wants to put a positive image of the lapband out to the public as part of her time on the show... And or this we need YOUR support!
Check out her Fanpage on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/MarissaZdazinsky
Please please please like her page and show your support! The production company is making their final decisions this week and we want to let them and Bravo know.. That WE WANT MARISSA!!!
So I missed my fill yesterday, I've been laid up in bed with a knee injury so I wasn't able to go.
I still have restriction which is GREAT but painful as a reminder for the carb craving I've been on.
Um yeah.. ask me what I ate yesterday? Biscuits. Yep just biscuits.. hot fresh out the oven with honey and butter.. that's what I ate for the whole day...
Today my face is FAT.. so there will be no more biscuits.
But I don't know where this out of control carb/bread craving is coming from. I don't even have PMS as an excuse. But all I want is carbs. The other night I made baked potatoes and dirty rice for dinner.. WHO DOES THAT?!!??!
But I've been fighting off this craving.. it's out of control.. it's so bad even a piece of paper looks good to me.. (oddly enough when I was a kid I used to eat paper) but yeah..
I know they say that cravings mean you're deficient in something.. I've been eating balanced meals, I don't know what I would be deficient in.. guess it's time to go google.
I rescheduled my appointment for the 4th, that gives me time to undo any damage I did on my carb binge.. but um yeah.. HELP.. send donuts lol j/k ok well maybe just one..
Just shy of 14 months out, finally in my sweet spot and losing PRAISE THE LORD!!! I'm at the lowest weight I've been since having surgery and shrinking...lt's been 2 months since my last fill - lol had to remember I'm not catholic , this was starting to feel like confession lol.. anyways.. as I lose and my body is shrinking... my skin is so ITCHY, mostly at my incision sites. I use cocoa butter and coconut oil on a daily basis and stay hydrated so it's not dry skin.. it's all weight loss related.. like the skin that's used to being covered is now being exposed to air or something.. but the incision sites, the incision sites are something else completely. Maybe it's because 1 of them has keloided - oh the joy of being mixed lol.. but they are just ugh.. I can't even explain it.. is anyone else experiencing this? There's no rash/infection etc.. it's just ITCHY!
It's the strangest thing to watch and feel my body lose weight and change. I mean just the weirdest sensation. I have to wonder why I didn't feel this when I was gaining weight. As uncomfortable and as many weird sensations as I've felt losing it, you would think there would have been some tell-tale signs when I was gaining; but no. Or maybe I just chose to ignore them.
So the strangest sensation to me is feeling my ummm private areas shrink. I know most overweight people have what they call a "fat pad" covering their pubic bone area.. but as my stomach shrinks and that area shrinks it's just the strangest feeling. I woke up this morning like something was "off" so I go and look in the mirror and I was right something was indeed off.. FAT and unwanted pounds. But now.. now one side of my stomach is an inch tighter than the other side.
Ok so maybe all of this is an overshare but I KNOW I cannot be the only one experiencing this. Like I look in the mirror and while I never had a HUGE belly it did hang more than I would of liked stopping just before my pubic area..but now the right side is up and so is the left, just not as much as the right.. a whole inch difference to be exact.
Thank the Lord for being celibate right now because ummmmmm my naked body changes on a daily basis! There's no hanging/sagging skin - THANK YOU JESUS! but the fat I do have is shifting/changing where it's deposited at as I lose it. For instance.. my bra-line incision is now in the middle of my stomach and to the left, not under my bra and centered like it was.
I'm at a point where I'm SO anxious to see what's underneath all of this, I now understand why people get surgeries like liposuctions and tummy tucks... Watching my stomach shrink and get definition is AMAZING to me... especially when I really haven't been working out. I know I know.. I could be alot further on in my process but I was so consumed with other things I wasn't making time to workout like I should...and the muscle weight gain I experienced was a turn off but now I'm back at it. Doing what's necessary to burn the rest of this weight off and sculpt the beautiful body I know is underneath. I've always had a nice shape, just a big shape..an hourglass but the big ben of hourglasses....if that makes sense lol.
So I'm SUPER anxious and motivated to get to the final result. In the meantime these sensations are just SO weird to me.. and when you think about it, it shows you just how amazing the human body really is.
The sensation I'm experience is my skin being able to breathe, being exposed to air after being covered by layers of fat or rolls previously. First it itches and can be painful as the skin is healing but then it just heals up into smooth, soft, supple skin. It's the most amazing thing.
The down side is seeing stretchmarks where I didn't know I had them.. like the backs of calves. I've always had nice legs, big, powerful, muscular, as the little bit of fat that was on them goes, I can see the traces of stretchmarks, everyone says I'm crazy and they don't see anything, but I see it, has to be in the right light but it's there.. I see it! Then again I've had stretchmarks since I was 8 yrs old... They're all old and faded and blended in with my skin. Only if I tan too much do they really show or turn red.
Ok I'm rambling but seriously this journey is just AMAZING to me... absolutely, positively AMAZING.
My journey...
My weight loss...
My weight gain...
My progress....
My thoughts...
My feelings...
My prayers...
My beliefs...
My faith...
Noticing a trend here? My and by my I mean Me. This is the best thing I've ever done for myself. My journey is not yours, nor is yours mine. I wouldn't want it any other way. I'm here to encourage and uplift by my blogs, thoughts and comments. Spread love and encourage nothing else.
I see/hear some comments and receive some that just leaving me with a blank look on my face and going *blink...blink*, your issues are not mine, feel free to share and comment but be careful to not try to PUSH/DUMP/UNLOAD your issues or feelings on me or anyone else, I wonder when some of you will stop trying to find yourself in others and find yourself within. That's when this REALLY works, when anything YOU really wants to do works. Whether it's weightloss, business, or something else. You have to find it within YOURSELF to do it, just as I have to find it within MYSELF to do it. We should all want those around us to be our very best, and we should encourage them and love on them until they reach it. Just my two cents.
So after the NYE portion control at the party success...(see previous blog) I went to dinner last night with a group of people from church.
Chain of command is basically My Pastors, Me, the ministers, ushers, etc..
So at the cheesecake factory, of all places I ordered the small plate greek salad with no olives. It was sliced cucumbers, roma tomatoes and some feta cheese over greens.
The lady next to me then orders the same thing, then changes her to the asparagus salad, then her husband who normally gets the regular sized cheese pizza, orders the small pizzette, and so on down the line, with the exception of 2 or 3 people out of 8.
As the course of dinner goes on my Pastor asks us if we're getting cheesecake, everyone looks to me and I say "oh no sir, not on the plan."
We walk out, say our goodbyes and go.
Today my Pastor calls me to put the church on a fast until Feb 1st. Nothing but fruits, veggies and protein powder drinks mixed with water.
As you all know this is pretty much how we eat so I just had to laugh a lil' because it's spread like wildfire. I've lost 42lbs + (I'll weigh in today) in the past 5 weeks, a noticeable result and now everyone is on board.
See my band has gotten me healthy, and it's getting everyone else around me healthy as well. Like my Pastor spoke to us about leadership last night, What makes a good leader? Achievements... If you've made achievements people will follow you regardless of your methods.
I chose not to tell people at church that I had the surgery, I didn't want the judgements, food policing and gossip, etc... So I kept it to myself.
I think it's the best thing I could have done because now my choices are influencing and leadings others to make positive changes, so that hopefully they will not get to the point where they feel they HAVE to have the lap-band. I'm in faith that those that need it, will receive it, and those that just need the guidance will receive that as well.
Oh well just thought I'd share.. I think this is a great thing! Kind of like a cleanse no animal products at all for the next 27 days or almost 4 weeks/month.
Soy and almond milk, here I come. Need to keep my protein up.
Let me start by saying I am SOOOOOOOOOOO tired.
SO SO SO tired...and I realized as I went to set my 2.19 down for my sugar free redbull....I can't DRINK IT... UGH
Red bulls are how I make it through when I have too much too do and I need sleep....what's a girl to do???
Oh that's right i've had those 5 hour energy drinks before, they're not HORRIBLE and they don't fizz, I guess I could..
Eh wait there's isopure I'll just drink one of those, the protein should keep me up or something zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
*Note to self* Isopure grape frost is good, but it doesn't keep you awake. I need a nap, but alas I'll be going back to the store for that 5 hour energy drink... Zzzzzzzz
LMAO... I took my first progress pic last night and it's the first time I took a pic straight on without the use of "flattering fat girl camera angles" in I can't even tell you how long.
I'm sure you all know the tricks.. Camera UP way UP so you're looking up and the excess chin or in some cases chins are below your jawline and aren't seen in the picture...
Uh huh... famous for those...
That being said I didn't have to do that last night and I'm just one week well 10 days post op.. I'm SO excited!!!
Progress, progress, progress!!! Love to see the changes!
:drool:
So Diane from True Results calls me today to follow up on how I'm doing. I tell her I think I'm doing great and seem to be doing better than most.
We go over incisions, etc... she agrees. Then she says do you have any questions. So I say well yes actually I do, why is it I'm supposed to be be on liquids when I can eat things like chicken salad as long as I chew it up. Her normally friendly up beat voice changes into this motherly tone "Now Yvette, we went over this, you don't want anything to get stuck, you're still swollen and you don't know what will happen."
"Ok ok, but I was reading on lapbandtalk.com and other people..." she stops me short - "This isn't about other people it's about YOU so you need to do what your doctor told YOU to do. If you want to be on full liquids fine, but don't go eating any meat or vegetables" she says sternly.
"So you're saying I probably shouldn't be eating cream of chicken and mushroom soup together?" - Silence on the phone.
"Hello"....
"Yvette we've been over this, no meat, no vegetables and NO chicken salad!"
Sigh....
Mmmm yogurt!
