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About this blog

Excerpts from the life of a woman on a mission

Entries in this blog

 

1/18/10 - 1 month Post-Op, first fill and OMGOSH They FIT!!!

So today is my 1 month post-op and I also received my first fill, and let me tell ya, it came RIGHT ON TIME!   So the first fill was easy, lay back, pillow under your back, cross your arms, do a lil' crunch, relax and done.   The weird part was when she took all of my fluid out to make sure how much I had in me, then added a cc to it.. I could feel it "flush" through my body/band, what I imagine those lil' canisters at the bank would feel like as they get fed through those air tubes. It didn't hurt, it was just a weird sensation.   Moving on to better news... So the other day I had my first non-scale victory (NSV - yeah I'm learning the lingo lol) on a whim I decided to try on my ever so expensive seven jeans that I bought 4 years ago, when Lane Bryant first started selling them. Yes the ones Kimberly Locke modeled with the rhinestones and crystals and tears on them.. Yes those ever so fabulous, expensive and I'm glad they're still in style ones.   Let me say when I bought them in 2005 I was at the smallest I had been in YEARS or almost like ever. When I tried the jeans on I had to POUR myself into them, do the tight jean jump up and down, wiggle and finish with a deep breath in to button them. But I got them to fit, they were tight but they fit, and I figured I would keep working out and they would fit better. They were cut VERY small... I was an 18 or 20 in other jeans but in these jeans I had to buy a 24. The sales girls just smiled and said yeah they're cut REALLY small, be lucky you can fit into them, most people can't. I wore them once, I got "stuck" in them and had to have my brother free me with a pair of pliers as he carefully jimmied the zipper down so I could get out of them.   So back to my "on a whim" moment. So I decide to try the jeans on, as I do every couple of months, in hopes that one time, just one time they'll magically fit. The last time I tried them on they were about 6 inches from buttoning. Hmmm maybe if I wear a long shirt, some rubber bands or my big 80's belt I can pull them off... Yvette you BETTER not walk out of the house in jeans you can't button.. sigh.. the years go by the gap grew from an inch or two to the most recent of 6 inches from closing..   So I decide to check my progress and put the jeans on....THEY FIT... OMFREAKINGOSH!!! THEY FIT!!! and not just FIT but FIT COMFORTABLY!!!!   I have been wearing them pretty much every day since I tried them on on Saturday night. Ok so it's only Monday, doesn't matter... they FIT and I'm wearing them to get my money worth! lol   But all of that being said brings me to what I was told at my appointment today....Drum roll please...   Waist is down 7 inches since surgery one month ago!
 
Weight is down 22.7lbs since surgery one month ago.
 
I've lost 12% of my 66% of "extra weight" and am 90lbs from my doctor's goal for me.
 
My BMI is now in the 40's high 40's but still 40's!
  My doctor says my progress puts me at the 3-4 month post-op mark, and this was done in a month. She was VERY happy for me, and I was VERY happy as well as I fastened my fabulous jeans after my fill lol   I came home and had some soup, then a couple of ours later some applesauce.... about half way through the applesauce I felt I had had "too much" so I know the fill worked...YAY!!!   I'm SO glad, because after eating 2 big tortillas yesterday (bean & cheese burrito and a quesadilla - took me 3 hours or so but I ate it) and the mini loafs of bread that come from the cheesecake factory a couple of days before I was starting to feel like I felt before surgery, so this fill definitely came right on time.. I'll see how this one goes, I think she could have put in another CC, but I'll go back in on the 8th and get another one, I honestly think that will put me in my sweet spot...we'll see. Either way I'm feeling great and I'm loving life. This is THE BEST THING I could have ever done for myself! :confused:
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

16
 

Feeling FABULOUS!

Let's call it metamorphosis - the closest thing I can liken it to is a caterpillar cocooning and turning into a buttterfly. Except my cocoon has mirrors and I allow the occasional visitor. I'm definitely undergoing a transformation, my fill is working, I'm rarely hungry and when I am I eat small portions. I'm officially a size 22 dress which is for me a BIG deal, even though I've been a size 22, 20, even an 18 in jeans, I haven't gotten below a 24 top. So my dresses were always in the size 24-28 range depending on the cut and store.   Officially a size 22 which is for ME a HUGE deal, I feel GREAT.. I feel fantastic.. I feel....FABULOUS!   I'm definitely in the middle and midst of something great and I can't wait for it to continue.   NSV this week - Down from a size 48D to 40DDD - yes they actually got BIGGER! lol.. Down from a 24/26 dresss to a 22 Double chin has almost vanished completely! Taught myself how to do "professional" looking makeup. Rocked absolutely everything I wore... And then ran into an old friend who just CHEESED when he saw me and couldn't get over or stop saying how great I look. That was just amazing (especially since he's the best friend of an ex boyfriend lol) this is absolutely 100% the BEST thing I ever did for myself.. I know I'm experience God results and my change is rapid and I'm SO thankful for it. Praise Him!
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

13
 

Taking my own advice....*caution this is a bit of an overshare*

I have often told those dieting or making an effort to lose weight to be sure they DON'T weigh themselves daily. This habit becomes obsessive and can be disappointing. I really need to take my own advise.   I woke up this morning anxious to see the scale move down another pound again... I got on the scale.. I was .8 from it moving... frustrated I remembered what the skinny girls I used to work with would go on and on about.. "Oh I never weigh myself until after I have a BM, it makes such a HUGE difference." Hmmm works for them, may work for me. I go about my day..... and the time comes.. after I run and get on the scale now .6 away from the scale moving down... "Hmmm poop sure doesn't weigh very much does it?!?!?" I think to myself.   A few minutes later I'm having an over share moment and I'm talking to a friend of mine who has the same weight loss struggles I do, we laugh about how different it must be when skinny girls poop cause she had tried the same thing and had the same result I had. We've decided all of their fat is stored in their intestines and that's why they always look thin, but evidently have REALLY heavy poo.   My day continues and another BM comes...ok now THIS...THIS has got to make the difference.. I run and jump on the scale .1 from the scale moving... Are you kdding me?!?!!??! Ok I give up.. I give up.... I'll stop for the day. I end up taking a nap and waking up to have a dinner of black bean burgers and hummus, water and a small glass of organic soy milk.   I decide to weigh myself again... I gained .7 that can't be right... I get a call and forget about it... a couple of hours later.. I'm on the scale again... WHAT?!??!?! HOW COULD I HAVE GAINED 3LBS?!?!?!??!?!?!   So the moral of the story is, dont' weigh yourself everyday and if you do make sure it's at the same time everyday but don't stress if it goes up or doesn't move because our weight fluxuates by a few pounds through out the day and there's absolutely NOTHING we can do about it.. also we tend to weigh more at night, as we're water and just as the ocean tide is effected by the moon, so are we. I know all of this, I've done the research for YEARS and yet I think I was becoming addicted to the high of seeing the scale go down every day.....today was a reality check and reminder to TAKE MY OWN ADVICE!
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

11
 

2 months post-op and 2 fills later....

"I thought you would have lost more weight by now" my mother says while we're having lunch yesterday. :frown: (the look on my face while I work on not choking on what I was chewing.)   "Well I'm supposed to lose 2lbs were week, I'm 2 months post-op or 8 weeks post op today and I'm way ahead of that goal. Yes I could have lost more if I was working out like I should and didn't eat crap for the last two weeks since I've moved but I'm still way ahead of where I should be."   "Oh ok.... I guess" she says as she shrugs and eyes me as she looks back to her plate.   I saw that... now suddenly UBER "aware" of what I'm eating (6oz steak, veggies, starch) I felt that old feeling rise up... "Would you ladies like pie for just 99 cents???" the waitress interupts.   "What kind of pie?" I ask... She lists them and I decide on peach, warmed with ice cream. Ala mode just like my extra pounds evidently..   I then turn to my mom.. "What?!?!?! We're sharing."   "I didn't say anything Yvette... eat what you want to eat..."   Already feeling full I take a couple of bites of pie and eat the ice cream. I know I know.. SLIDER food.. but it was good and I realized in that moment I will struggle with food for the rest of my life. I know I can overcome it, I've done very well since being banded but in the last couple of weeks there's been too many slip ups and letting the cravings get the best of me.   I don't know how those of you with kids do it, since I've had children staying with me for the past couple of weeks it's been WAY harder, they eat ALL the time and they want things I shouldn't be eating. I love them but I need to find a balance or something lol..   Guess it's practice for when I have my own. :redface:   Either way no more.. today I'm going back on the basics I was eating, I'm going to make my list and go to the store and get what I need to make healthy band and kid friendly meals. For the days they're eating crap, I'll do shakes/smoothies. No pizza, no pasta, no more bread and NO MORE SWEET TEA! I made it with one meal and it's been "Can I have tea?" ever since... and every time I pour them some, I pour me some.. EMPTY CALORIES! UGH..   Ok Done with everything else, as I was typing this this morning, I was on my prayer call and the person leading intercessory started praying about appetites being controlled and eating just what we need to feel satisfied, not to eat til a point of gluttony. God will minister to you in many ways...   It's time to get serious...Think I'll start some twoadays at the gym as well..   It's friday, my day off. I have to put my bedroom together, it's the last room in the house that hasn't been completed after my move. Tired of looking at boxes and clothes thrown everywhere.   Then to check my mail, the bank, other errands and plan my menu. But before all that... I'm going back to bed
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

11
 

Fat Girl Moments....#FatGirlMoments

These are the moments where I realize how fat I once was, am and no matter how much weight I lose, will be.. It's because it's not on the outside it's on the inside. It's a mental thing.   I sit here writing this... 80lbs....wait make that 83lbs from goal. As someone who can lose 10+lbs in a week.. I really have no excuse to not hit my goal by my birthday in Oct. Even if losing at a slower rate.   This week, I hit the lowest number I'd been since I've been on this journey and it felt so good.....I then proceeded to make these "victory meals", cause that's what you do when you have something to celebrate right?!?!? #FatGIrlMoment - There was Ribeye Steak, Pork Sirloin Steak, "Light" Jello Salads ok....not so bad, but then we got to the mashed potatoes.. It's a celebration let's load them up... Garlic mashed potatoes, with triple cheddar cheese, with a touch of cream cheese and butter oh and bacon, and finally green onion for color.... These potatoes were and have been a meal in themselves for me in the past. They're so good they come straight out of my "Get Your Man" recipes/book I'm working on. But that's besides the point, the point to this is.. through the celebratory eating over the last 3 days I have gained 3lbs...   Last night having seen the scale move up 2lbs I decided "It's ok I'm gonna work out hard and lose it again" and I REALLY REALLY REALLY want donuts. So off to walmart I go, in the middle of the night for donuts, they didn't have the kind I wanted.. so I settled for my 2nd favorite again justifying it in my head, it's ok... I haven't had them in Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo long, I think I may have actually caught myself talking to them about how I'd missed them at one point. #FatGirlMoment   But here's the kicker.. today when I got on the scale, I actually got on the scale with a donut in my hand and was eating it as I looked down at the scale, half expecting it to move down. No shock and awe here....it was up, I'd offically gained 3lbs in just over 3 days....   Things like this is exactly why it's SO important for us to get the mental aspect about losing weight. Why it's SO important to understand our relationship with food and how it effects us, not only our bodies but our emotions as well.   I look forward to my #FatGirlMoments both good and bad as they're always a learning experience for me. And this time I learned a big one.... Everything we pick up is a choice, everything we eat can either move us closer to our goal or further from our goal and that's how we have to look at it. One day at a time, one meal at a time, one bite at a time. It's not easy... but I'm in faith I can and WILL do this!.
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

9
 

The problem with fat people is....

Ok so I'm by no means thin or skinny but my surgery has definitely helped, if not made me change my outlook on food and over eating.   I now know and understand how the rest of the world looks at us and why some almost feel a disgust for us. I never understood it until now... and now that it's finally clicked I never want to be there again.   Before I continue let me first say I don't believe in discrimination against anyone for any reason. I also do not believe in judging a book by it's cover and I realize this may be hard for some of you to read or accept but it's my thoughts and my blog and if you're bothered by what I say, feel free to kindly hit the x, or take part in a respectful and intelligent debate. I'm up for either.   All of that being said...let me continue. The problem with fat people is... 1.) We're killing ourselves 2.) We (meaning most) do nothing about it 3.) We've developed such shameful eating habits that we've also developed denial right along with it. 4.) We encourage others to eat with us, as if when we eat with other people it doesn't count. 5.) We seek out others like us, so we have eating buddies.   I can go on and on about all of this.. but it has really just got to stop.   So, my ever so rude awakening came when I opened my home to a young lady from church. I invited her to stay with the hopes of helping her grow spiritually and financially and remove her from the living situation she was in.   Everything was ok at first, until I started noticing her eating habits. Just greedy and fat and not in a cute lil' have a fat day and pig out kinda way. In a I eat like this EVERY day at EVERY meal kinda way.   Understand this is not a rant about any one person, I just use my examples as a reference point.   It's hard for me as a foodie to live with someone who eats so extreme, especially when I'm still recovering and being delivered from that area myself.   For years I had myself fooled that "I didn't really over eat." because I went all day without eating and then thought nothing of going through the drive thru at 10pm for 2 double cheeseburgers, fries and sweet tea. Rationalizing it in my head that I hadn't eaten all day. When the truth of the matter is, that was too much freakin' food at one time, for anyone at any given time. I was eating like a linebacker and wondering why and how I ended up with the physique of one.   I really thought there was nothing wrong with my behavior, or at least I thought, I thought that.. looking back on it I realize now that I would ALWAYS mute my phone while ordering so the person on the other end didn't hear. Or eat it in the car and throw it away before I went in the house, even though I lived by myself... All acts of a shamed and guilty person.   So now I have a young lady in my home who thinks nothing of downing 3 fried hotlinks at a time. These are not small hotdogs, I mean the hillshire farm kind that can be split in two and used as a hotdog...that type. Someone who I made 2 boxes of mac & cheese for easy leftovers, I had 1/2 of cup and went back to put it away only to find an empty pan.   Someone who as I'm making cookies for church (simple breakaway readymade ones) can't control themselves and takes a block of unmade cookies and thinks it's funny.   Someone who has lunch, then comes home and ransacks whatever is in the fridge not an hour later, eating a dinner I prepared for someone else.   And to be honest....it's disgusting. I had to stop and have a moment and repent for thinking so poorly of someone but then I realized being obese really truly is a disease. The trouble with fat people is, we don't see it often times until it's too late. We're literally eating ourselves to death and it's disgusting to watch.   I wonder how many times did someone think the same of me? People would always make comments to me about how they don't consider me "fat" that being "fat" was gross and that I wasn't, I was just overweight. Skinny/thin people would make these comments to me and I never understood why, or what made me different. Was it the way I carried myself? How I dressed? How I was shaped? No what it is, is that I NEVER ALLOWED them to watch me pile food into my mouth like some out of control cross between a hungry hippo and a garbage disposal.   Even if I was eating out with people I would eat normally. Sometimes over indulging in bread, but always having a takehome bag/box. UNLESS, I was having a "fat day" with one of my "fat friends" who had lured me out to eat something fattening and just indulge in it. This is where we sabotage ourselves and each other.   While it's fine to have a cheat day or meal, we shouldn't encourage it with each other. I have a good friend who lives in another state and we would both get Oreo shakes and bacon cheddar wedges from Jack in the box and eat them while on the phone together when we were having "bad" or "fat" days... WHO DOES THAT?!?!??! Fat people...that's who!   I notice too how my friends plan their vacations around eating, I've had 3 people say to me "Oh when I get there, we're gonna eat this this this this ____ this this this blah blah blah..." I just kinda laugh it off when the reality is ummm NO WE'RE NOT... you might, but I'm not.   Then the funny part is when you don't indulge your fat friends will then start to try to gode you into eating with them, by saying things like "Oh you think you're too good now cause you lost some weight?" or something to that effect, even though it's in a joking manner.. they still mean it.   Or friends who look at you funny because you've lost weight... and say things that they mean as a compliment but really just come out sounding bitter.   We do it to ourselves...all of this to ourselves and the problem with Fat people is we're sick and we don't even realize it. Looking back on it I know and realize I was addicted to food. The tastes, the flavors, the textures.. I would almost get a high off of it. I think that's why it's so hard for me to watch others now who are still sick.   It's like when someone stops smoking, they can't stand to be around other smokers.. it's the same feeling..   Ok I'm rambling.. feel free to respond or not I just needed to get this out.. these thoughts were blocking my other thoughts I needed to get to for another writing I'm doing.. but man.. whew.. I feel better :smile2:
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

9
 

At the risk of embarrassing myself....

I'm just gonna ask...   Anyone else have intestinal issues since surgery? Gas, where there was none before. Lack of time or warning before the feeling of "having to go" hits you like a ton of bricks, etc???   I NEVER had these types of issues before surgery, ever. I'm not sure what to do or say about it... is there anything to do or say about it? Or is it just a side effect of losing all this weight?   *In my Ben Stein voice* - Anybody???....Anybody??? lol
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

8
 

Eh it's just not the same...

So I had pizza last night.. I was craving it.. (I know I know) I blame the $10 for any large pizza email I got from Pizzahut...anyways I got thin crust thinking this would help with bloating...etc..   Eh it's just not the same.. you ever eat something cause you had a craving and then you're like "eh" this isn't what I was expecting." or "this isn't as good as I thought it would be" - yep totally the reaction I had last night.   Or maybe it's truly that I just don't care for pizza really, and especially pizza hut.. either way I was just about full after a piece, I started to eat another one and I was done.. which makes me glad I didn't get hand tossed but seriously who wants pizza on a cracker? Ick!
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

So fulFILLed....

So I had my 2nd fill and welp yeah it worked, I'm not hungry AT ALL like never.. I make myself eat only because I know I'm supposed to, but I have that satiated feeling constantly which is great until I actually eat and I/my body/brain has a hard time saying when to stop because I've felt "full" for days now...   In other news, I joined the gym.. yeah we'll see how this goes... For $50 bucks a month I BETTER go.. lol
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

Banding, Business, Bread and Blogs!

Let me start by saying I love my band and the results. At 3 days shy of being 1 month post-op, I think my band and I have now become "one". I no longer "feel" it or feel concisious of it.   I've won the mental battle and it's been great. I feel great. I constantly find myself looking at food going "Wow that's too much." so portion control isn't really an issue.   I have found though that I need to stick with what works for me. My church has been on a spiritual fast of fruits and veggies. I felt like I was actually gaining weight, and started to see some weight come back in my face. I believe this was because I wasn't getting enough calories to burn or protein. So while I'm still sticking to the fast as much as possible, I've realized that I REALLY need to do what's right for me.   If that means 3 days fasting, 2 days eating, or whatever it is I need to do to complete it I will.   Also now that I'm back on a full schedule of traveling with my clients I've realized how difficult it can be to constantly eat out and stay not only on the fast, but within band friendly foods.   I was working and traveling with clients from Monday straight through til the following Monday. That was ALOT of eating out. ALOT of Cheesecake Factory, Houston's, Bing Crosby's etc.. Lots and lots of lil' eateries between AZ, Cali and everywhere else we went.   I managed to do well at all of them, and oddly enough, nobody ever noticed or mentioned that I never finished a meal and always had left overs.   Since I was eating salad mostly, it was easy to explain not taking them back with me. But some foods not so easy, people look at you crazy like "why aren't you eating that?!?!!??!" Or why are you skipping dessert..etc...   Or my personal favorite because I used to think the same way... "How do you come to the cheesecake factory and NOT get cheesecake?!??!?!?" lol funny how your outlook and priorities change.   In other news: I am READY for my fill on Monday. I don't think I need much of one, as I'm still full off small amounts but I ate bread last night, no problem. I had my initial "full feeling" after eating... waited a lil' while and the bread and butter was CALLING me. Hot crispy on the outside, soft on the inside sourdough and soft butter... I slowly and carefully ate 3 small slices over the course of about an hour (i was at home) but after eating an hour before hand, that's not something I should have been able to do.. so I would definitely say it's time for a fill, and for me, it's coming right on schedule!   Other than that I'm off to verizon for a new phone, since I managed to break mine in half.. then I'll be back to catch up on the blogs. Looks like some of you have been BUSY while I was away.
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

It's not about you....

My journey... My weight loss... My weight gain... My progress.... My thoughts... My feelings... My prayers... My beliefs... My faith...   Noticing a trend here? My and by my I mean Me. This is the best thing I've ever done for myself. My journey is not yours, nor is yours mine. I wouldn't want it any other way. I'm here to encourage and uplift by my blogs, thoughts and comments. Spread love and encourage nothing else.   I see/hear some comments and receive some that just leaving me with a blank look on my face and going *blink...blink*, your issues are not mine, feel free to share and comment but be careful to not try to PUSH/DUMP/UNLOAD your issues or feelings on me or anyone else, I wonder when some of you will stop trying to find yourself in others and find yourself within. That's when this REALLY works, when anything YOU really wants to do works. Whether it's weightloss, business, or something else. You have to find it within YOURSELF to do it, just as I have to find it within MYSELF to do it. We should all want those around us to be our very best, and we should encourage them and love on them until they reach it. Just my two cents.
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

New life starts NOW.

My goal is to lose 115lbs. Maybe more, I'll see when I reach the first goal. I've successfully lost over 130lbs before and managed to keep most of it off (less the 60 I gained back). When I reached that goal I always said, eh I could lose another 50-80lbs.. Well now feeling like I'm pretty much back where I started (I'm not but it feels like it) I'm going hardcore and it all starts today.   My surgery is scheduled for 12/21, I am scheduled to start my pre-op diet on Monday. Me being gung-ho decided to get an extra week in as a way of "Easing" myself into it.   Yesterday I went and got my provisions, Protein mix, skim milk, frozen strawberries, yogurt, salad, chicken, etc....Then in a celebration of my last meal I also added some ice cream to the cart, not one but two different pints. Pint 1.) Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie. Pint 2.) Bryer's cookies & cream. Now if I could have found my all time favorite Oatmeal Cookie from B&J I would have bought two of those and gave myself foodgasms all night but alas I'll suffice with those.   I checked out and started on my way home, and some how, some how my car took a right instead of a left and I ended up in the drive- thru, just one last time. Oh golden arches how I'll miss you and our cheapy tawdry affair. You were always there for me when I needed to come by, early, late, doesn't matter you're always ready and willing to put out just the way I like it. Hot, Fast and cheap, In and out with a lil' sweetness at the end. Mmm speaking of sweetness let me get two large sweet teas one with no ice... What???That way it doesn't look like it's all for me.   Mcdouble no pickles, they just ruin your pure beefy taste, french fries oh how I love it when your hot golden salted crispy goodness enters my mouth again and again. I must admit, I get a lil' sad when you're done, something about you makes me just want to keep you in my mouth enjoying your salty goodness. Mmmm what is that delightful sweet nectar I taste? The sweet tea I wash you down with. That's right, I say as it feels like you just hit my sweet spot. Basking in the afterglow, I lay back and let it course through me like a heroin addict who just shot up.   This isn't good for me, I know I know Ronald I've said it before, but I mean it this time. No more, we have to break it off. You have no power over me. Don't look at me like that, I mean it.. I have to go. No I won't be back.. I won't and don't call me either.   Breaking up is hard to do, but they say they best way to get over a man is to get under another one. Or in this case two. Ben & Jerry fulfilling my two man chocolatey threesome fantasy yet again. Yes take me, take me..fill me OMG YES!!!! YES YES YES!!!! Wait what do you mean you're done? we just started.. it was just getting good. The two of you could never keep up with me anyways, get out!   Frustrated I wait a lil' bit, but I"m still turned on. Turned on like some sort of crazed eating machine, I set my sights on Bryers, "come here my sweet" mmmm, um oh.. um yeah.. eh, just stop. This isn't working out for us, you're not as good as I thought you would be. Just go...   A couple of hours past and that familar remorseful feeling comes over me.. WHY did I do that??? I know better.. Ugh.. Now I need a shower or something.   A couple more hours go by, the feeling doesn't pass. I comptemplate if I'm REALLY ready to change, to stop doing things that I KNOW are not good for me, and stop living to eat and start eating to live. Hmmm cucumbers and ranch sound really good right about now. Oh and maybe just these crackers.   But today, Today my friends is a new day! I will fast, be celibate and stay true to my new found relationship, even if protein shakes tastes like eggs and @ss. I've heard there's some good ones, I'll have to explore those flavors, for now I'm on these "Designer Whey" protein shakes, even with the strawberries and the vanilla extra and ice and 2 oz of skim milk added in, it still tastes awful. But I'm commited I have a goal, I've started early. I would like to drop 30lbs before the end of the year. Which should be easy for me, as the bulk of that will be water weight.   So here I am, stripped down, standing before you as my own "Before" Picture.. which I'll be taking later to commerate the start of my new life. My best life is ahead of me, and I'm going after what's mine. Life solutions, not resolutions. AMEN!
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

Recipe Alert - Red Carpet Ready Cake - You can thank me later lol

So I came across this AWESOME recipe...and as fat kids, former fat kids and on our way to being former fat kids... you know there's one thing we all have in common... WE LOVE CAKE! lol     So I came across this awesome recipe for "Red Carpet Ready Cake" they're individual cakes that are SUPER band friendly and easy and the best part it's a 100 calorie snack ok 150 if you go crazy with the toppings.. but don't! If you're following weight watchers it's 3 points (I'm not but the creator of the recipe is soooo figured I'd add it in for those of you that are.)   Ok so here's what you'll need:   1 Box of Angel Food Cake Mix (I used Duncan Hines) 1 Box of Flavored Cake Mix (I used Pillsbury Strawberry because I know it's SUPER moist and it goes well) Water Optional: (but in my opinion SO necessary lol) 1 container of Cool Whip Free - yes FREE not lite, FREE. Fruit to garnish.     Go home open both cake mixes and mix them together in a ziplock bag or container that you will hold the rest of the mixture in. Once it's mixed you're ready to go.   Now the cake part:   In a microwave safe container mix the following: (I used a big coffee/soup mug)   3 tablespoons of cake mix 2 tablespoons of water 1 minute in the microwave   Top with Cool Whip Free and Fruit (I use blueberries or sliced strawberries but just a couple)   Enjoy!   Save the rest of the mix for the next time you want a sweet treat that's both band and weight loss friendly, while being quick and delicious!   Like the title says.. You'll thank me later! lol
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

Carb Coma...

So I had a battle with the box of vegetable thins and the box one... *sigh*   But I slept and SLEPT and SLEPT and could totally go back to sleep right now.. I think I'm in a carb coma.. I hadn't had simple carbs in SO long, it started with the bread on monday, then the bread on thursday, and now the crackers on monday/tuesday again. Every time I eat them I get SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO sleepy. Guess that's a big hint to STOP eating them huh?   Must become productive....
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

Soda, "Chips" and Cake and still losing weight....

I've had the strangest cravings for potato chips and soda lately. This was never anything I craved pre-surgery and yet here I am just shy of 14 months post op and I am CRAVING them.. I of course, know this isn't something I should be eating.. but recently on a trip to Kona Grill they had taro chips. I'd tried these once before but didn't really remember them but now I'm HOOKED. It's just like a potato chip you can season it and do all kinds of flavors with it but it's great just plain with sea salt... Then last night thinking I was grabbing Taro chips I grabbed Terra chips - Exotic Vegetable Chips... this is a packaged blend of Taro, Yuca, Sweet Potato, Ruby Root, Batata and Parsnip chips...SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO good and works on that whole "sweet/salty" thing.   But eating this makes me want soda.. diet soda but still soda, which I rarely drank prior to surgery and the few times I've tried it post surgery has been hard... but I've figured out if I pour it over ice and let it sit, it's drinkable and don't hurt to drink...     And then... then there's the cake... some of you make have seen my blog about the recipe or the RED CARPET READY 150 calorie cake.. which is SO good, but I wanted real cake, with frosting so I decided to make one myself.. I made a yellow cake from scratch using mayo and applesauce, sounds gross but it was DELICIOUS and I made a cream cheese frosting to put over it... I'd eaten nothing but cake and beef jerky for 3 days and still lost 3lbs... how is this possible?!?!?   I mean not that I was wanting to gain weight, obviously not, but with results like that.. it makes it hard to not want to go on a cake diet lol...     At any rate, my food choices obviously need to improve, but I think I'm making up for being on that fast or 30 days lol... but I'm still losing so I'm happy!.
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

My new food obsession..

3 weeks post-op today, I feel great, I LOVE my band :thumbup:   I went to lunch with a friend yesterday who's on the spiritual fast with me. We decided to do appetizers and salads.   I got the greek salad no olives or cheese.   He got a ceasar salad and zuccini.   Then I found on the menu what seemed like an "interesting" appetizer... Sweet corn tamale cakes. OMGOSH delicious! Like UNBELIEVABLY delicious. And as I quickly found out, may or may not be considered band friendly lol. They're mushie so they're easy to go down. However, they're corn meal/masa so I'm not sure if what I experienced was them bloating in my stomach or just all that my stoma would allow. I'm going to go with the latter because corn meal doesn't tend to "bloat".   I ate 1 and 1/2 of the cakes (shared) with the salsa, avocado and sauce toppings and I was DONE.. Like DONE DONE... I didn't even touch the greek salad. I had 2 bites left when I got that "full" feeling but I admit, old habits to finish it came up only because it tastes SO good. Sigh.. it's a battle being banded when you're a foodie, but I'm learning and recognizing more and more every day.   So me being me, am on a mission to make a healthier version of them, replacing sugar with agave nectar, butter with, I'm not sure yet because well I LIKE butter lol... but it's not on my fast.   The sauces I can do... well except the one with mayo, I gotta find a way around that one.. maybe use vegan soy mayo and see how it turns out.  
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

$63,468.64

The price tag on my surgery. Nevermind the $800 for my first fill...That my insurance doesn't seem to be covering all of.. Question though. If it's $150 for a fill with no insurance, how is it $800+ with insurance and I'm responsible for $186 of it. HUH WHAT??? :blink: :thumbup:   I think I'm going to have to have a conversation with their billing department because one of these things is not like the other.   Or how do you get the surgery cash for 15K yet my insurance is being charge $63,468.64???? How does that add up? I guess I should be ok with it and grateful it's going to my insurance and not me but REALLY?!??!! $63,468.64??!??!?!
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

7
 

Strawberry "Shake" Smoothie Recipe

I made my best protein shake yet today. My friend turned her nose up at first but then decided to try it, "I just want a lil' bit..I might not like it" she says as she tastes it she looks at me surprised and is like OMGOSH this is really good!!! And it's all healthy?!!??!?!" as she darts back toward the blender for more.   It tastes just like a strawberry milkshake and it was delicious! The recipe I'm posting made 2 shakes.. The first time I split it with someone, the 2nd time I've just been sipping it all day... The upside it has SO much protein in it and doesn't taste like it at all.   Ice (I fill the blender about a 3rd of the way) 4 tbsps Fage 0% greek style yogurt (I use the plain but you can use the vanilla) 2 scoops Designer Whey Protein Vanilla 6 frozen strawberries 1 splenda packet 1tbsp Agave Nectar (can use stevia or honey, etc...) 4-8 oz of skim milk (depending on how thick you like yours) Blend and enjoy!     The 2 scoops of protein powder = 36 grams The 4 tbsps (I do heaping ones) = 20 grams The 8 oz of skim milk = 8 grams The strawberries are around 1 gram so we won't count those..   In this one mix you have 64 grams of protein. Easy, delicious and filling.   It's around 500 calories for the entire blenderful, split it and it's 250... either way that's great.   Protein powder 100 calories per scoop serving Skim Milk 100 calories 8 oz serving Fage 0% yogurt 120 calories per 8oz serving Strawberries 50 calories per 12 oz serving Agave Nectar 60 calories per 1tbsp serving   For me that's all I've had today and a sugar free jello... and I've met my protein for the day while staying full and feeling like I have a delicious strawberry milkshake :tt2:
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

6
 

I love my life!

We hear it all the time... "I love my band", I'm going one further and saying "I love my life!" I've said this a lot prior to the band, but with it I find myself saying it much more often.   That sense of confidence that comes with it, the great feeling of knowing that I'm doing everything I can to be successful and extend the life I love so much and of course, the changes my body is making that make me feel good and seem to be making people compliment me for.   Yesterday was intended to be a very special day for me, and although things didn't go exactly as I had planned, I did have a few interesting surprises.   I have a date for myself every month where I go and get all of my girly things done, mani, pedi, waxing, etc... If you do it on the right day (within the first 3 days of your period) the results will last for 4-6weeks as opposed to 2-3 weeks. Anyways... as I said it was intended to be a special day so I decided to go a step further and get my make-up done by a friend of mine that works at MAC.   Just as we were finishing up, Surprise #1, our mutual friend pops up to come "supervise" to make sure my make-up is right for the evening/event that was supposed to happen and that I'm dressed how she wants me to be dressed lol -ok you'd have to know her to appreciate it lol.   Our friend instructs on the necessary changes for my makeup, more dramatic, more blush, etc... few mins later we're done.. wow it was "pretty" the first time... now it's umm WOW...   Next stop lane bryant, as my friend has decided that what I was planning on wearing wasn't good enough and would be too big, as it seems the majority of my clothes are these days. (YAY!) She decided I needed new clothes. Definitely God's favor as they had just laid out the Icon clearance rack. For those of you that are fashionistas you know that Icon is the upper echelon of Lane Bryant, most stores don't carry the Icon line, you have to order it online and you're going to expect to pay typically around $100 for each piece or more.   Everything was marked down so that the most you would pay is $12.99 per item....WHAT?!?!?! Ok surprise #2! - JACKPOT!!! $300 worth of dresses for only $26.00 later...we decided on two dresses. One sweater cowl neck dress and one cocktail/party/special event dress. Either would have fit the scheduled event.   Shoes to match? Check.. (Really one pair that matches BOTH dresses?!?!?! - YAY for surprise #3) Cheap accessories that look expensive from the skinny girl shops? CHECK! - WHO KNEW??!?! I tend to avoid these shops, no real reason to go in.. Found jewelry in these shops that's nicer than what you find in LB, Avenue and Torrid at a fraction of the cost... $2.90 for a tennis bracelet? 4.90 for a long necklce, etc.. it was great! - Good lookin' out Surprise #4! lol   I get home and get the look together...FIERCE! You couldn't tell me NOTHING... I knew I looked good. And as I came to find out, so did the people around me. LOL... As I was waiting for my companion (before I cancelled (surprise #5 because this is the love of my life who has been away for over a year in iraq) cause he was taking too long - long story involving kids, bedtimes, saying good night and different time zones by the time all of that was done it was now 10pm our time and um I'm going to need to go on a date at a respectable hour, yes yes I know I pushed from lunch to dinner.. but this was too much and too late, but I digress...back to the blog...)   As I was waiting on my love to sort out his family things, I decided since I was already dressed, to go to another mall near my house to see if they had the shoes the other mall didn't have. I go in and who do I run into? My most recent ex-boyfriend! (surprise #6) the store he moonlights in happens to be next to the store I was going to.. but normally he doesn't work on wednesdays... but as fate would have it, he was last night lol. 60lbs lighter, inches smaller, mani'd, pedi'd, waxed and make up done...lookin' SO good.. in my new form fitting dress and shoes, I see him staring as I walk by and his eyes...his eyes all but literally POPPED outta his head, he was so taken aback. YES YES YES!!! I LOVE MY LIFE!!! LOL   I ended up going into his store so he could get a better look lol, there's nothing between us, defintely don't want him back, he was a 6 month rebound. But I must admit, I did love his reaction! LOL...Yep I love my life lol !
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

6
 

Noooooooooo say it isn't so!

So being banded 12/18/09 I've been doing great, restriction, loosing weight, feeling great and still able to eat bread, rice, etc...   My last fill on the 5th I went very aggressive as much as my dr. was willing to put in 1.5 ccs and I FINALLY felt true restriction...   They say it takes about 2 weeks to be able to tell what your fill really did...   So this morning... I decided to have a turkey sandwich...I eat half of the half of the sandwich and I feel it... the BREAD.. STUCK.. trying to come back up... ICK... say it isn't so? I LOVE my bread.. love love love bread.... I did what we're not supposed to do and drank some water to help it go down but MAN... say it isn't so, what's a girl to do with out her bread?
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

6
 

It's contagious...

So after the NYE portion control at the party success...(see previous blog) I went to dinner last night with a group of people from church.   Chain of command is basically My Pastors, Me, the ministers, ushers, etc..   So at the cheesecake factory, of all places I ordered the small plate greek salad with no olives. It was sliced cucumbers, roma tomatoes and some feta cheese over greens.   The lady next to me then orders the same thing, then changes her to the asparagus salad, then her husband who normally gets the regular sized cheese pizza, orders the small pizzette, and so on down the line, with the exception of 2 or 3 people out of 8.   As the course of dinner goes on my Pastor asks us if we're getting cheesecake, everyone looks to me and I say "oh no sir, not on the plan." We walk out, say our goodbyes and go.   Today my Pastor calls me to put the church on a fast until Feb 1st. Nothing but fruits, veggies and protein powder drinks mixed with water.   As you all know this is pretty much how we eat so I just had to laugh a lil' because it's spread like wildfire. I've lost 42lbs + (I'll weigh in today) in the past 5 weeks, a noticeable result and now everyone is on board.   See my band has gotten me healthy, and it's getting everyone else around me healthy as well. Like my Pastor spoke to us about leadership last night, What makes a good leader? Achievements... If you've made achievements people will follow you regardless of your methods.   I chose not to tell people at church that I had the surgery, I didn't want the judgements, food policing and gossip, etc... So I kept it to myself.   I think it's the best thing I could have done because now my choices are influencing and leadings others to make positive changes, so that hopefully they will not get to the point where they feel they HAVE to have the lap-band. I'm in faith that those that need it, will receive it, and those that just need the guidance will receive that as well.   Oh well just thought I'd share.. I think this is a great thing! Kind of like a cleanse no animal products at all for the next 27 days or almost 4 weeks/month.   Soy and almond milk, here I come. Need to keep my protein up.
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

6
 

Outta the mouth of babes...

Kids are SO honest, it's a great thing truly...even if/when it's a lil' TOO honest.   So today my friend's 7 yr old son saw my new look and says "Who's that?" to his mom.. she very confused, asks him "what do you mean? Who's that? Who's who???" and he points at me..   This is a child I spend 2 days a week with if not more, however I hadn't seen him in 3 weeks... and he was CONVINCED I was NOT the same person. His direct quote... "That's not Ms. Yvette, Ms. Yvette is fatter."   His mother now mortified looks at me embarrassed and all I could do was laugh and tell her you know what? Kids are honest... if you ever want to know how you look, ask a child. LOL   This goes on with my other friend's 7 (and a half - as she says) yr old daughter telling me all of my clothes were HUGEEEEEEEEEEE as she helped me do laundry. Now after seeing my current size she says "Ok those look normal" lol... funny what a few inches of material can mean to a child's perception, or anyone's really. On the upside, I'm encouraged to continue on with my weightloss and continue on with this "transformation" I'm making... besides I know if I were to go back, I'd have two SUPER honest 7 yr olds to point back in the right direction lol.   In other news...fill on friday, still trying to figure out if I should get one.. i think so since I was able to eat two turkey dogs on whole wheat buns with no problem... Hmmmmmm just how much is the question... decisions, decisions...
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

6
 

Day 4, pants, work and the shopping trip.

Today is day 4, I did entirely too much. My port incision feels tight and pulled like I may have done something to myself. Could have been when the cart rolled into me, could have been the pants, either way.. I will rest up for the rest of the day.   Today I woke up and had yogurt for breakfast, that kept me full, but I decided I needed a protein shake to go all day. When I got home from my moms, I did some work, and got dressed. I put on the loosest but still cute and professional outfit I could find, luckily for me I work from home for the most part but I did have appointments out today.   I made my shake to go and went off to my first appointment. Everything was fine until I had to follow him, he walked what seemed to me as "REALLY FAST" normally I keep up with him no problem. But I could feel my stomach tightening, gas? pain? pulling? dunno.. just make a joke so he'll slow down.. joke joke, ok I got nothing.. Sorry if I can't keep up with you today, just had surgery. "Oh ok" he says as if I had just said there was paper in the fax machine.. like umm ok.. awkward but whatever...   Finish with him and on to the next, I walk into the building and the smelll makes me nauseated.. umm ok gotta go... back to my car, driving driving driving.. trusty shake by my side.. wait sitting sitting sitting, but these are my big pants, why are they digging into me right there.. ahhh ok there we go..   Whole Foods, they have the BIG thing of Fage yogurt on sale for 6.99... yogurt got it, wait what's this brand it has 24 grams of protein, WOW.. hmmm ok.. let me try this one too, oh what else do they have.. An hour later.... on to the next place.   By the time I'm driving to the next place I'm nauseated from the gas pressure and I think I just did too much, lifting a grocery bag, walking around for an hour, etc.. but I still need some groceries.. Let me go to the store on the way home.   I get to my street.. I think I can..I think I can.. I go straight instead of turning, I pull into the parking lot and I sit in the car feeling wiped out but trying to psych myself up.. wait what do I even need again? Oh that's right SOUP!   I walk in, as normal as I could and see the motorized cart, I jump in, screw it, I need it.. MEEP MEEP!   I get my shopping done with ease, but I bought too much, how am I gonna get this home? sigh.. I drive the cart out to my car, put the items in the front seat. Go to drive the cart back into the store and it stalls going up the lil' incline and pushes the full force/weight of it onto my stomach.. OUCH.. the guy from inside comes from outside to help, and he yells at his female co-worker who is standing less than a foot from me, for not helping me. I don't necessarily agree with HOW he said it, but i'm glad he said it so I didn't have to.   I come home and pull out the light things, the rest can wait.. inside groceries put away as much as possible, pants off.. ahhhh hmm I'm hungry... WOW that was the BEST cream of chicken and mushroom soup I've ever had in my whole life.. I would hurt someone for some pizza right now.. I don't even like pizza.. but I do like the crust.. mmmm   Soup.. delicious.. couple hours later, I wasn't hungry but because I knew it was in there I had some chicken salad.. I wanted to see how it went down, how hard it was to chew, etc.. all in all I had about 1 tablespoon of it, maybe a lil' less. Went down well, tasted even better... tomorrow I'll eat that.. tonight is my first night home, my first night sleeping in a bed, I layed on my bed at my moms but it was too high and hard to get up and down from, the couch, too cushy, the recliner, just right... so I stayed and slept in that recliner 95% of the time..   So now I'm in bed laying on my side.. wanting to roll onto my stomach and just SLEEP a good sleep..   on the upside NO pain meds today, all systems are GO and now I'm just tuckered out.. so with that I will say good night world. :cursing:
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

6
 

No fills and counting....

The pounds go down on the scale...so it's been awhile since I've been on or blogged but just a quick update. I haven't had a fill since December... which was great at first then I got to the point where I was throwing up then ok then throwing up then ok... Not wanting to waste the co-pay and not get a fill I just decided to go it on my own.. Come late April/May I evidently hit my sweet spot because I've lost more weight in the last 3 months than I've lost the entire time I've had my band. I was starting to feel like I was a band failure hovering at the same weightloss since 6 months out of surgery... not really gaining, but not losing either.. or if I gained 10lbs losing it (hormonal) then just balancing out at the same range..   So now I am 1 yr 7 months out since surgery, it's been 8 months since my last fill and about 2.5 to 3 months since I hit my "sweet spot" I no longer HAVE to shop in fat girl stores, I am now able to shop in the skinny girl stores even if it's they're biggest size, it fits... So now my band is just truly giving me portion control...the way it's intended and now I'm losing losing losing.. I've also stopped weighing myself since the 1st...So I have absolutely no idea what I weigh at this point but everyone keeps telling me how I look like I've lost so much weight and I actually see the changes on an almost daily basis.   I guess I've just stopped worrying about it and just doing my best to live right and eat clean... always room for improvement and it's a process but it's getting better everyday! Hope you're all doing well.
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

6
 

A change is gonna come...

I'm sitting here blogging when I should be packing and moving. PROCRASTINATION - LOL - Anyways I'm going through clothes seeing what fits and doesn't fit so I don't take it all with me.   As I'm going through things and realizing the bulk of my clothes are either too big or too small I started to think about all of the changes that have happened to me and my body is the last couple of months (including pre-op) and it's just AMAZING. Everything in my life has gotten better. I have a pretty great life anyways, but I feel better, I look better, my business has gotten better, my home has gotten better, finances, etc... just everything seems to be falling into place. Moreover, it's only going to continue to get better; and those are the changes I'm SO excited for.   I found a pic of me and my mom from my wedding day 8 yrs ago size 26 bride in a size 30 wedding dress because you know they run small and I remember at the time feeling pretty but uncomfortable. Not at all what I imagined I would feel like as a bride. I feel better on a daily basis than I felt on that day all done up.   But now, as I enter into my relationship with my special friend, I can't help but smile when I realize I will NOT have "fat" wedding pictures.   In just over a month I went from "cute pics" but having to use the infamous fat girl angles to get them to being able to take a pic straight on and from almost any angle.   And it's paid off, some offers have come my way from some people I've dealt with in my past and some new people as well. They can tell from a pic if you're using an angle to create a look. But they've noticed the difference in just the few new pics I've taken and now.. I'm sitting here wondering... Is it crazy that at 33 I'm considering going back into plus size modeling? I stopped when I was 21 and started packing on weight, especially in my face. But as it comes off...I'm thinking hmmm I could totally do this. I know I don't "look" 33 to most people but now I have to sit back and figure out if this is really what I want to do.   I already run my own business, a church (churches) and act as a personal assistant to two people. Not sure when I would make time for it.   But it's a dream deferred so to do it, or not to do it? Not many women my age get this opportunity or these types of offers.. I should take it. I still have weight to lose before I go full force into it because unlike in my day if you were a plus size model you were actually plus sized.. now you're a size 10-12 and they photoshop you fatter lol..     The differences just amaze me though, in such little time... just amazing.. God Results!   Before with a camera angle..   Last week... straight on.. no camera angle.
Yvette1026

Yvette1026

6

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