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Story of a thin girl stuck in a fat girl's body.....

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Day 1

Ok...I am lying..It isn't day one. It's really more like WEEK ONE...... I have had in my head for weeks my trip to the US back in April. I had not seen my best friend in a year and a half. We were talking about my weight ( a topic sandwiched somewhere between upcoming Jazz Fests and world politics) and she said, "You know, they do weight loss surgery laproscopically these days and it's not very risky."   Now, had this come from any of the other billions of people inhabiting this planet, I would have smiled, walked away very annoyed, muttering foul names under my breath and never spoken to them again. But, we share a rare sort of honesty we know is always tempered with the most amazing love, loyalty and respect...a once in a lifetime friendship. Instead of doing what I MIGHT have done, I walked away feeling sad that my friend was so obviously disturbed and worried about my weight........   So, I went and had a nice Mexican meal...most probably washed down with a pitcher of margaritas.....Didn't help my weight, but sure was yummy!   After returning home, I tried to forget the whole thing....Then a week ago, I had a dream about having "stomach stapling". That morning, completely unsolicited, my next door neighbor told me about our former neighbor who got "banded." Well, hey...God doesn't need to hit me in the head with a brick. I could see the signs...Thanks God!   I began my internet search and found myself here...among fellow wannabes and brave already banded LAPers!   Now, less than a week into this thought process, I am having epiphanies all over the place and imagining unleashing this thin girl I have inside me. My husband started out with a typical man response...Why don't you just work out more...They DO like to have all the answers, don't they? Now, I have him calling the insurance company for me (we are in the Netherlands, and although I can speak in Dutch, I am afraid I will end up in an Austrian hospital with a vasectomy if I try to discuss the ins and outs in Dutch.) He has also offered to go with me anywhere I need to go for appointments. And, he said if I want it, I have to do it....Pretty good progress for a few days. maybe after I am banded, he can eat all the goodies I am missing and I can live vicariously through him! :-)   Anyway, I am wrapping my mind around the whole idea of a foreign object inside me. (As if it is the FIRST thing foreign inside me...but that was when I was single...hahahahahaha :heh: ) Ok...enough about my sexlife.....   WAIT...NO! Back to my sexlife...I am also imagining me in my old corsets and things......waaaaaaaaaay back when I actually looked sexy in them! And, it would be nice to make love and not lie there in terror that my stomach was going to be touched at some point..... Anyone relating...Yeah, I bet!! Man would I love to hit forty looking HOT!!!!!! Forty and Fabulous sounds like a goal I can live with!!! Better get started..I only have three years......   Heading off now to get some beauty sleep...Wouldn't it be nice if sleep made you thin too??? I think I would have to be Sleeping Beauty...........Rip Van Winkle......you get the drift.....
Charlif761

Charlif761

4
 

Working on the Chain Gang...

Well, it took me an entire week and a few days to find 10 minutes to slip away and make some calls to sort out the procedure for being evaluated for the LAP band, and to find out if insurance pays. I am so bl9oody busy at work that I cannot manage to stop to breathe, much less make phone calls.....But, ok, I MADE myself do it day before yesterday.....   HOORAH!!!! My insurance company will pay 100% if I make it through the consults. THey gave me the name of the clinic that I needed to call to get a form sent to me. Once i have it, I have to go to my "huisarts" (house doctor) and haave him fill it in...   I am sure it goes something like this:     Name: Blubber Butt Height: Too short for her weight Weight: Too mcuh for her height Bodyfat: Broke the caliper Recommendation: SAVE THE WHALE!!!!!!!!!!!!   lol KIDDING guys!!!!   Anyway, once he fills it in, I have to send it back to the clinic, wait for the surgeon to evaluate and then they contact me to make an appointment for a consultation. If he/she approves the LAP band, I have to go to some other place for a series of counseling sessions and health assessments (they want to make sure I won't die in curgery or have comlications). After that...who knows. It is a process that they say takes 6 months or less. I could be having my last FAT CHRISTMAS this year!!!!! woopiee!!!   I feel like I am working on a chain gang.....................
Charlif761

Charlif761

1
 

The Dairy "Diet"

OK...so maybe I am getting older and weirder (as if it were possible...the weirder part....getting older is a given unless you are a vampire...). I SWEAR the older I get (I know, I said it already, and no, I am not 80 and senile!), the more things I find I cannot eat without really bad effects on my body. So, anyway, I have learned that nuts make me have to RUN for the bathroom. So do eggs. NO! I am not talking about run to hide...I mean that eating them makes me sick as a dog and it is either get to the potty or hire a maid! :eek: Now I am finding out that dairy does it to me too! Tonight, I made a strawberry smoothy with lots of milk...something I rarely drink....and I got so sick! Oh wait!!!!   Sorry....detour...... Maybe if I live long enough, I will become allergic to every kind of food and A. Not be able to eat them anymore, or B. get such severe diarrhea every time I eat them that I will become skinny from lack of nutrition..... <<<<<<<     OK, OK.....Not realistic. Back to my story. Wait....what was my story? $HIT! I forgot...... Maybe it is this getting older thing..... (kidding, it was supposed to be a joke about being senile.....anyone get it?)   Anyway, truly, I am now starting to think about all the things I CAN have when I am banded...especially the liquid phase. Now tell me.....is this a good thing? For example, is this a sign of me mentally preparing myself and planning ahead. Or, is this bad....An example of my really horrible subconscious preoccupation with food? Maybe I am thinking too hard...   Maybe I am getting older.....Did I already say that??? :nervous   All right enough of that....   Anyway...what really happened today? Well, I tried to call my insurance company to see if they cover the surgery. Apparently I have to call a toll number (5 euro cents a minute) and speak to someone to get the answer. Problem? Yes, you can only call from 9-5. I work from about 8:30 to 6 and don't really want to be discussing my business in earshot of all of my colleagues. Stupid Dutch lack of service! And they make you PAY to call them! Anyway, I am going to have to go in late on Monday to call them. After they say yes or no, I decide whether to upgrade my policy or get on with my next step. Either way, once I get that info, I will then call and make an appointment at a clinic about an hour from here. Hubby has agreed to go with me, and says don;t worry about money, we will just pay it outright if I want it. Nice huh? I am also researching other places I can have this done..... So, I am seriously putting one foot ahead of the other.....And, I am having DREAMS of being skinny again.....   Bikinis, short shorts, sexy lingerie.........HERE I COME!!!!!!!!! I think I might walk around naked the rest of my life if I get back where I wanna be!! Hell, I might join a nudist colony...Wait....now I AM going too far!   OK, outta here....more insanity from the "Weird and Wonderful World of Me-ville" tomorrow......
Charlif761

Charlif761

1
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