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On my way...

to loserville!!! WOOO HOOO...I can hear the train getting closer and closer...   I have a blog that I do on another site. But I love this board...now that I just found it so I am going to copy and paste some of my blogs from over there. I will start blogging here with my next one and then copy that to my other one. :thumbup:   I look forward to getting to know all my other banders!   Happy Hump Day!!!   2 days and I start Optifast... I am getting so excited and nervous as the same time. I can't wait to start this journey to a healthier me!   So it is going to be a busy few days. My husband does home dialysis. He was dx in kidney failure 2 months after we were married and 4 months later started dialysis. (So much for a honeymoon year) With doing home dialysis the clinic needs to do home visits to make sure he is doing everything right...which I have no idea why on him it has to be done when he labs are great and they tell him all the time that he could be the poster child for home hemo dialysis.   So that means I have to really clean up around the house and get everything in order for the visit which is on this Friday...same day I start Optifast. Also have my PCP visit on Friday to get the medical clearance from him.   It is going to a busy time the next few days. But it will help the time go by faster.   Hubby & I got into it yesterday because he keeps thinking I can eat these two weeks. He said he was going to pick up some food at the store we can both eat. Salad. I was just like WTF you know with all my talkings I am on pure liquids the next 4 weeks. Just really bothered me that it appears he has not been listening to a word I say about my diet coming up. So last night he tried to get it all down and we went over it and over it again.   Just gets me sometimes that it comes across like he does not care what I am doing. Or put enough effort into something that interests me to get to know more about it etc, since when it comes to his likes and desires I give in to make him happy. The phrase I keep hearing in my head is from Bill Engvall saying "I'm just a guy..." as in what do you really expect from me.   Guys have it so easy that they can have things blown off so easy with that simple mentality that I am just a guy... wonders if that will ever change with men???   Okay sorry about the guy rant just on my chest and needed to get it off. I love my husband very much just needed to vent.   Back on track...still need to go to the store and get some more stuff for the liquid portion starting so that I can try and curb and hunger pains. Which will be really hard to start over the weekend here because we have my step-son so him and my husband will be eating and from what I have heard is the first few days of Optifast are the hardest...   So if I can survive this weekend without cheating then it will make me that much stronger. And I will have much more success I am hoping!!!   I brought up the idea to my husband of us starting to do the couch to 5k workout plan. His first comments were I can't I dialyze in the evenings. I then explained it is only 3 days a week and you have off dialysis 2 days and then there is the weekend that we can do it before or after (if he runs early) But I would really like to see him and I do this together as he has a few pounds he could lose as well. (He has been told that if he goes over a certain weight that he will not longer be eligible for a transplant so he was evening thinking of getting lap band too)   Now I have Spongebob's "I'm Ready... I'm Ready" in my head...guess that means it is time to get moving for the day...   4 days and counting... Till I start Optifast. I have a feeling I am going to be cranky for a few days. But I have gotten a few of the foods or liquids that I can also have to help. Sugar free Jello and made some sugar free popsicles. Thinking it might be easier to buy them next time. LOL.   I have gone through all my notes again on the surgery and the foods that I will be able to eat and when post op so that we can start to get ready. Start to stock up now. : )   The next few weeks I hope fly by. It is going to be really hard seeing my husband and step son eat food and me not be able to but it will be well worth it in the end.   This weekend I was bad, last night for dinner I had my hubby get a pizza saying I won't be able to eat it after this week. So I am trying to eat some of all my favorite foods which is crazy. I thought about the pizza today and I can still have it. Will just have to scrap it off the bread and be careful about the sauce but the toppings and cheese will be a great source of protein.   One thing I am not looking forward to giving up is pasta. I could eat pasta noodles all day and night. Little olive oil, garlic salt, orgeno, and parm chesse mixed up and ooooooh so good. I know I have read it is easier once you go without for awhile. So we will see.   Well Friday will be a busy day for me. Have to go to my PCP to get the results of the pre surgery tests and get his medical clearence form. Then go to the surgeons office to get the official start of optifast weigh in and get my drinks on. Then it will really sink in that I am doing this.   I can't wait to see the weight start to come off. I will be posting on here my official weigh in weight and all my measurements for the start of the Optifast. I really want to see how much I am losing.   My goal this week is to start exercising. At least 15 minutes a day to start. Our living room in a sunken one so I have my own stairs I can start working as my stairmaster. Two steps up and down...just hope my knees can take it!   Starting to hear the train whistle getting closer as it approaches to take me to loserville!!!   Eating everything I can to get rid of it... I know that does not sound like a good idea, but I hate wasting stuff. Growing up I always had to eat everything on my plate...then to top it off if there was food left I normally was forced to eat that as well. No wonder I have weight issues and over eat.   I just want the junk food out of the house. Next week I start optifast for the lap band. I spent today going through and making notes what the next 9 weeks are going to be like. Betweek the 2 weeks of optifast, surgery then the 6 weeks that follow till I get the first fill.   My hubby is getting so excited. He has seen some photos of me from high school recently, when I thought I was fat and huge at 180 to 190 and he says I look like I was anorexia. (He wears some funny glasses) I must say though looking back at them I did look thin. I would love to be at that weight again…and I know I will be…and I hope I can get to the goal weight I desire.   Hubby says he won’t be able to keep his hands off me…which he can’t right now…which at times drives me crazy…I don’t know what I will do when I start to lose…cut off his hands? Get some cuffs and just lock him up at night? LOL   I am really looking forward to start this process and lose this weight that has been hanging on me for so long.   Time to say bye-bye to all these extra pounds once and for all!

Cortney75

Cortney75

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