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My Life in the Fat Lane

My name is Cindy I am 38 years old. I have been fat for the majority of my life. When I was in the fourth grade I noticed I was fat. It was when we had our pictures taken and when they came in it was like I saw myself for the first time. When I got home I remember falling down on the bed and crying all evening. My mother tried to console me with words that were at the time meaningless nothing she said helped. So that was my earliest memory of being fat and obviously it stuck with me. I have from that point had low self esteem and with that comes overeating and making bad choices in life that will lead you down a road you don't really need to go down.   As I got older the weight was like an ever growing monkey on my back. I tried every diet there is, some I was successful with and others I wasn't. I'm just soooo tired of the yo-yo that I have had with my weight, and I'm ready for a change.   For some people in my family they look at lapband surgery as a useless thing and all I have to do is just buckle down and "if you really wanted to lose weight you could", and if you have ever had someone in your life to act that way without having to spend one day in your shoes, you just want to slap the shit out of tham.   My husband is my life boat. He is so supportive of my decision for the lapband. I have decided to reach a goal weight of HEALTHY , not of a certain number and I think that is something that I have never done before.   I have always been concerned with a certain number and I know that my body will lose weight before my mind will. I will be that fat kid for a long time but I know that eventually my mind and my body will meet up with each other.   Imet my surgeon back in May of 2008. His name is Dr. Jay Suggs. He is in Decatur, Al and he was very nice! I set up my 6 month supervised diet I didn't lose anything but I didn't gain either. In June I had all of the required labwork done, EKG, and an ultrasound of my gallbladder, that went well. The ABG's were no fun but I made it through without passing out. Also in June I had my appointment with the Psych MD. That was fun, it took a little longer that I had expected but all in all it was good. My last visit with my Nutritionist was in November of 08 and BC/BS approved me the first time out for a Janurary 09 surgery.   I had a small financial setback and I had to put the surgery off until I had the $1,100 for the fees and hospital co-pay. I have it now I am hopefully going to have my surgery in November.   Right now my life is looking pretty sweet and I can't wait to have this surgery to help me on this weight loss journey!!:confused:

cindyj33

cindyj33

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