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In the beginning...

I probably should've started this blog at the very beginning of my journey but better late than never right? I guess I'll start from the beginning. Back in High school I wasn't very overweight. I actually looked pretty good now that I look at pics of myself. I wore between and 11-13 and weighed between 145 and 160. After graduation, I married a guy that I shouldn't have and I gained about 80 lbs. So then I was up to 240. After about 2 1/2 years of depression from an abusive relationship we finally seperated. I lost about 30 lbs and I was back into 12/13 and very happy because I met the real love of my life. We dated for about year and he proposed to me. We got married and he deployed to afghanistan 2 weeks later. During his deployment I gained the weight I lost back plus some bringing me to the grand total of 247 lbs. People when then look at me say I don't look that big b ut everyone knows when you actually carry this weight and see it on yourself its a whole different story. Naturally gaining all that weight made me more depressed which put strain on my marriage. I'm so lucky that even though my husband and I had fights to where I thought it was really over, he never gave up on me. He stuck by my side. I am truly blessed. I tried to work out and eat right but you know how that goes... your motivated you start that monday and by thursday your slacking again. I decided to get the band because a friend of mine had it and lost 60 lbs. Also my older sister decided to be banded with me. She was banded Dec. 5. Since being banded on February 16th as of yesterday I've lost 13.5 lbs.:wink: I figured out today if I lose 2 lbs a week minimum, I can lose about 66lbs by my birthday (oct. 5) leaving about 9 lbs to go to my goal. I know thats not counting the plateaus that seem inevitable. :cool2: I just really want to do well on this. The stories of people who lost huge are such and inspiration to me and then there are the stories of people who only lost a little and I know its mainly because they probably weren't doing what they were supposed to. I just don't want to mess this up. This was a huge decision I made and I want to be successful. I want to be happy again with myself. I owe to myself and my husband. I want him to have the confident woman he married back. He's been so good to me.Ok well I think thats enough for my first post. Keep in touch, I'll try to update at least once a week....or month...we'll see :wink2: Later Bandsters!
NCsQueen

NCsQueen

1
 

One month out!

Well, I said I would try to keep everyone updated more often, its not working out as well as I planned. :blushing:A lot of things have been going on with me emotionally with life lately. I feel like I may be trying to do too many things at once. I decided to promise myself that I will try-- key word here..."Try" to let things go and not let so much get to me. :crying:I realize that, that is what is holding me back on my happiness. I let too many things get to me, work, friends, family.. I spend all my extra time trying to make other happy and I realized I don't know how to make me happy. So that's my new thing is to start focusing on me first. Ok enough of my dramatics, I had my first fill on monday! I have a 10 cc band and they put 3.5ccs in. Ok so I'm sure everyone wants to know how it was. Well first off, it hurt!:thumbup: The needle is about 4 inches long and the width of a 14 gauge peircing needle! It hurt going and and coming out! Well the positive thing was I got to watch on the x-ray machine everything that was going on and I found out that the actual band is right under my breast bone, which makes sense because when I gets stuck thats where I feel it. They of course made me drink barium again to make sure everything was going down fine. That stuff is so nasty. All in all it lasted about 10 mins and I'm so glad that it's only once a month! I was on liquids all day monday and mushies yesterday. Today I get start soft foods but I do feel it a little, the restriction that is. I'm still learning to chew, chew, chew. Oh and I'm down 25 lbs!!:thumbup: So thats my march update!
NCsQueen

NCsQueen

1
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