Dear Folks,
Well, it is definitely time that I come clean with myself and return to my blog and face the fact that I have cheated quite a bit in the last 3 weeks. I haven't been getting on Lapbandtalk.com much because I did not want to face it, but its a reality I know o too well.
I'm not here to excuse myself and my actions in anyway, but more and more I can see ever so clearly how little I actually take the time to love myself. I just let myself fall off the bandwagon after spending $12K on a Bariatric surgery in December?? What the hell is going on with me? I must vent these emotions because I want to get to the bottom of it. I did just quit a really bad job situation last week and start a new one; yes, I guess I've been under a bit of stress, but that is no excuse for me to just walk away and cheat like I have.
So far, since my Lapband surgery on Dec. 22, 2008, I've lost about 18 lbs. and have got to get back on the horse and go back up this mountain of a journey. I've got to embrace myself and take it one day at a time. I ask for prayers and thoughts as I push forward with each of you at my side. Also, if anyone would be interested in communicating or being accountability partners or just friends that chat about their journey, please let me know. I would just really enjoy being able to email back and forth with someone else who is on their weight loss journey after their Band Surgery and welcome you to email me. My email address is: marialcole@gmail.com
Tommorrow I return to my Doctor for my first fill. This cajun girl is getting ready to kick it up a notch or two! Wish me luck and all the best to you guys,
Lauren :toetap05:
I feel that I need to blog a little bit about my pos-op experience and thoughts. I had my lap-band procedure on Dec. 22, and for the most part it has been a very good recovery. However, the first 3 days after surgery were much more painful that I prepared for mentally. Today is Jan. 2, and I am in a much better state of mind and physically all of my energy has returned. I have lost about 15 lbs. already since surgery and to be honest the liquid diet was not as hard as I thought until now. I feel I am starting to have withdrawals from having a normal meal. if I see or go near another box of sugarfree jello or broth I get really frustrated. I have kept my surgery completely confidential with only my parents and boyfriend knowing about it. It has been pretty difficult to explain why I am drinking broth / soup everyday to my fellow co-workers, friends, etc. without them questioning me. But I am really blogging tonight, because I don't have many friends or really any support group who has gone through this experience that I can speak to. I feel motivated but would love to hear what others have done to pass through the period of liquid diet without becoming completely daunted or depressed by it. Thanks and All the best, Lauren :thumbup:
Hello wonderful people and Merry Christmas to you all. I have just finished my last supper (brocolli and snap peas with a little teriyaki sauce on it), before I go on liquids tommorrow and have my lap band surgery on Monday (Dec. 22, 2008). I am thrilled about my surgery, yet mentally a bit nervous as to how difficult this journey may be. I have had a serious weight problem since I was about 8 years old. Graduated high school topping off at 280 pounds. It was a very humiliating and frustrating experience to say the least. While most people gain weight in college, I tried to do something and lose weight. I lost approximately 90 lbs. throughout college while on a very strict meal plan/exercise program and graduated with my Bachelor's degree at 190 lbs. It was a dream! However, I joined the work force a couple years ago as an Oil & Gas Abstractor/ Petroleum Landwoman and I slowly let go of my exercise regimen and healthy food diet and have gained close to 45 lbs back. My first instinct is to beat myself up and be ashamed, but that is probably part of the reason I am still dealing with my weight problem. What I really need is to take charge of my health and learn to love myself first and foremost. Then look at why I'm not on my list of priorities. As I prepare for my surgery on Monday, I feel amazed and embarrassed in a way by how I have not taken care of myself and let my health go. However, I am looking forward to the near future and the beginning of another journey to health and self discovery, as cheesy as that might sound. I just feel really grateful to be able to have the surgery, even though it nearly wiped out my bank account. If any of you guys have any suggestions as to what you did to have motivation at the beginning, please share with me. Also, was there a lot of nausea after the surgery? Well, good people, have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year's.
All the best,
Lauren
