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About this blog

I was banded on December 17th, 2009 by Dr. Robin Blackstone of Scottsdale Bariatric Center. I received my first fill (3cc) on 1/27/10, second fill (1.5cc) on 2/10/10, third fill (.75cc) on 3/1/10, fourth fill (1.25cc) on 3/29/10, fifth fi

Entries in this blog

 

Don't want to jinx myself, but I think I might be...

either at my sweet spot or very close to it. And, I never expected it would happen this fast. I've had two fills and am at 4.5cc in a 10cc lapband APS. I just can't get over how great the band has been working for me since my second fill (last Wednesday). There isn't anything I CAN'T eat, but I'm getting full w/small meals and not hungry between meals (which is my doctor's definition of a proper fill level). So, if this restriction stays and I keep losing 1-2 pounds per week, then that may be it. Really, I have a goal to lose 2.5 per week, but I'm willing to exercise my booty off (literally :thumbup:) to get there.   Or, if I do need another fill, I think it will be small at this point (maybe .5). I really hope this level of restriction will work for me, though, because I don't really want to develop a long list of foods I can't eat (like some who have their band tighter). Right now, I have a healthy fear of bread (just doesn't go down great, but I CAN eat it if I eat it slow). I'm noticing some healthy proteins are getting harder to get down, though (like salmon, chicken breast, meat in chili). Really, I just have to remember to chew them thoroughly, though. And, I haven't PB'd anything at this point. I just have discomfort if I don't take my time and chew well.   I THINK this means I am at my sweet spot or very close to it. I am going to a support group meeting tomorrow night so I am curious to hear what others have to say about it there.   Once again, though, I was able to eat dinner last night and then NOT eat anything AFTERWARDS without being hungry when I went to bed. Woohoo!!!
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So excited about my new found restriction!

I know I already posted about this yesterday, but it just keeps getting better and better. Last night, I had a small bowl of chili at around 6:30pm for dinner and was not hungry at all for the rest of the night. And, I am a big big late night eater, so this is big for me. I absolutely hate going to sleep on an empty stomach, but for once, my dinner actually kept me satisfied all the way until bedtime.   This morning I ran out of time to have b-fast so I grabbed a zone bar to have in the car on the way to church and I could barely finish it! Unbelievable!!! Usually I would just eat one of those to keep my stomach from growling. I don't actually get any 'filling' sensation from them even after my first fill. But, w/this second fill, oh yeah! Woohoo!!!   I also lost another pound this morning so a total of 21 pounds since surgery on 12/17. Its so so hard for me to believe this is even real that I could lose 20+ pounds in 2 months. And, not even being perfect about it. Usually, when I had done WW, I had to be absolutely perfect to lose anything and many times it would be a half pound or less.   Now I have been contemplating my behavior w/the band and how I really have not been working it as well as I could. Specifically, I had started slacking off on exercise and letting more liquid calories (as in cocktails and wine!) slip back into my life. And, I've asked myself is this what I really want... to do the band half-assed? And, the answer is NO! Clearly, its doing its job for me and its time for me to get more serious about doing my part.   So, now I think I am ready to make some goals. A friend of mine is getting married on April 2nd and I am making it a goal to lose 15 more pounds by her wedding so I can feel cute dressed up (instead of frumpy). I am 221 right now so that would put me at 206. To achieve this, I am going to:   1) Attend Jazzercise at least 2x per week   2) Walk for 30 minutes at least 4x per week (on the days I don't do Jazzercise)   3) Limit alcohol to only 1x per week   Wish me good luck and persistence! :confused:
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Down one more pound and some restriction!

I think I am finally feeling it since my second fill on Wednesday. I was on liquids the first day of this fill and mushies/soup the second day so I couldn't really feel it. But, yesterday, I tried veggie burgers, chicken, fish, vegies, and a teensy tiny bite of garlic bread. I was happy to find that I felt good and satisfied all day on less food and I could feel that I actually had a pouch. And, with dinner (fish, vegies, and garlic bread), I had to be super careful and chew my food really well.   At first, I started eating the green beans like normal (not chewing well enough) and I could feel them going down not so well. So, I had to slow down and chew, chew, chew. I had put a piece of garlic bread on my plate in case I wanted it (otherwise my family would gobble it all up before I'd even get to try it). I ended up taking just a tiny corner off of it because I wanted the taste, but I gave the rest to my son because I knew there was just no way I could eat it.   Wow, I LOVE that! Really, a taste is all I NEED. I know on other diets, I'd do so good through the whole meal (just eat the fish and veggies), but then could undo all my good intentions by eating two whole pieces of garlic bread as I cleared the table and put food away.   Now, I know I don't have the full restriction that I need long-term because I was still looking for food a few hours later. But, I was able to avoid any additional late night calories by having some caffeine free Stash Chocolate Hazelnut tea w/a splash of soy milk and some agave nectar. I guess I almost bit my DH's head off, though, when he asked me if it was hot chocolate. He said I gave him a really mean look. LOL I didn't mean to, but I guess that was the dessert monster in me that was not so happy about having the tea. But, it worked... kept my mouth busy and warmed up my belly so I could fall asleep.   Oh, I'm also happy to see that I am finally down one more pound now. So, the scale is moving again! Lately, I've been slacking on exercise so my goal today is to get out and do SOMETHING... maybe I will load up my iPod w/some new songs and go for a walk. :confused:
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2nd Fill Done!

My 2nd fill appointment went quick and easy today. I was so glad to see the waiting room empty when I got there. Usually there is ALWAYS a wait. But, this time they took me back right away. I was a little surprised that they switched my appointment to someone else to do the fill, but I was gonna see someone who I hadn't seen before anyway so it really didn't make any difference to me.   You could tell she was newer at it, though, and had to poke around a little bit. Lucky for me, needles don't bother me at all and my port is really pretty easy to access even for a newbie. In fact, a part of me thinks they may have had her do me since they know my port is easy to get at it. I remember Melissa saying I would be a good person to teach others on. LOL   Anyway, she added one more cc first, sat me back up, drank some water, went down fine. Then, she added a second cc, sat me back up, drank some water, and some burpy bubbles came up. So, she took back out 0.5 cc, drank again, water went down fine. So, now my total comes to 4.5cc (in a 10cc lapband aps).   I'm on liquids now so I don't know for sure if this gave me much restriction, but I am noticing that I can't guzzle water as fast as I could before. So, I'm hoping that is a good sign that I'll have better portion control after this fill.   Oh, and I still lost 2 pounds even w/the bad Big Mac attack. And, she said it was all fat so my fat percentage went down too. Woohoo!!! :w00t:   I drank a ton of water this morning to make sure I was well hydrated so I'm sure the weight would've been even lower if I went in empty. I'm trying not to play those games w/the scale, though, like I used to when I'd weigh in for Weight Watchers. I would go in starving and totally dehydrated just to see a loss. :tongue_smilie:
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Scared to get on the scale...

I had a bad bad weekend. Actually, if I am to be perfectly honest, a bad five days. Everything went downhill as of last Wednesday. I've just been feeling blah and unmotivated. My friend had her bday party last night and got a private cabana, bottle service, etc. Today, DH got McD's for the kids and I had a Big Mac. I can't even remember the last time I had a Big Mac.   Oh well, I gotta pick myself back up, weigh myself tomorrow, and get back on the program. I'm so glad I have my second fill scheduled for Wednesday. I so NEED it! And, I need to do my part too, but it will certainly help when the band will say no to the Big Mac even when I say yes. LOL
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Second Fill Appointment Scheduled

When I got my first fill last week (1/27), I was told I could have another fill in two weeks if I still felt I was in the yellow zone (hungry between meals, eating large portions, etc.). They just told me to wait one week to see how I feel first and then I could call and schedule the next fill for the next week. Yesterday, I was crazy hungry all day... may have something to do w/starting back at Jazzercise. So, I called this morning to schedule my second fill (thinking it would probably take them at least another two weeks to get me in). Well, I was very pleasantly surprised that they can do my fill next Wednesday, 2/10 (so exactly 2 weeks after my first). Yay!!! :biggrin:   Its funny, when I tell my friends how I get stuck w/a needle and aren't supposed to eat for 72 hours after, they figure I would want to postpone as long as possible between fills. And, personally, I was a teensy weensy bit tempted to schedule this fill AFTER Valentine's Day since DH and I have reservations for a very nice dinner out. But, above anything else, I just want to get this show on the road. And, ultimately, this will be my life. I can still enjoy our V-Day dinner out, but savoring a small amount of food (maybe just getting an appetizer for my meal) rather than stuffing myself w/a 4 course meal. I am ready!!! :confused:   I've been so happy w/what the band has done for me already, but I am eager to get it working to its full potential. :drool:
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I'm having a hard time believing it...

Every time I look at the scale, I'm having a hard time believing the number there. This morning I got on and found that I had lost ANOTHER two pounds! Woohoo!!! I am now down 19 pounds since surgery (12/17) and 26 pounds overall (from my highest). This is all SO fast for me. Don't get me wrong, of course I LOVE it! But, for the first time, my head is having a hard time keeping up w/my weightloss. I feel like people can't possibly notice a difference, but everyone says they can. And, I can't believe I could fit into a smaller size, but I just tried some on from my closet and they fit.   In a weird way, it feels like I don't deserve this because I haven't suffered and been hungry since surgery. I have associated hunger and deprivation w/weightloss for so long now. It is just so weird to be rewarded w/the weightloss, but without the discipline and obsession w/'points' required by WW. Or, eating your teeny tiny lunch on Jenny Craig and feeling so damn hungry you want to crawl under a rock until your next teeny tiny meal.   Of course, I have to follow the band rules and I guess that is a 'diet' of sorts. But, it sure is a hell of a lot easier than any other 'diet' I have ever been on and, at the same time, I'm losing weight faster too. And, even though I am still in the 'yellow' zone w/my band (don't have quite the restriction I should), it is helping me tremendously w/portion control and hunger which is SO FREEing after this lifetime of struggling w/diets that I have endured.   So, I guess I'm having a lovefest w/my band today. I can already see that this is gonna turn out to be one of the best decisions I ever made. :bored:
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2 more pounds down! Woohoo!!!

FINALLY, the scale is moving again. I was stuck at 227 for a couple weeks there. Really, it went up and then back down over the course of my TOM. I knew I was retaining water. Well, now all that water weight is gone and I'm down two more pounds. Woohoo!!!!!!   So, now I am 17 pounds down since surgery on 12/17 and 24 pounds down overall... almost 1/4 of the way to my goal. W:smile2:W!!!
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First Fill & 1 Month Dietician Visit

Yesterday, was the big day!!! I tried to update my blog last night, but hit the wrong key and deleted my update. But, I am happy to say everything went great yesterday. :cool:   I love my surgeon's assistant, Melissa, who did my fill. She took her time and explained the whole fill process and all the questions they will ask me each time to determine if I should get a fill. She said after this first appointment, I can decide when I want to come in again (anywhere from 2 weeks to 8 weeks). She also explained how important it is to focus on reducing percentage of body fat... that over the course of time it takes to get to goal, she wants me to go from 51% body fat to 30% body fat. I'm all for it! And, she cleared me to return to Jazzercise (which I have been dying to do - walking is so boring to me). I'm just not supposed to do the stomach crunches they do at the end of class until 8 weeks. That's OK, I am usually so worn out by the time we get to the floor work that I just lay there anyway when everyone else does the crunches.   OK, so on w/the fill. They have a big chair in every one of the exam rooms and I didn't know until this appointment that they electronically adjust all the way back so you are lying down when they put the needle in. So, I got to lying down, she cleaned the area, and told me to look away while she put the needle in. It was quick and no big deal. She gave me 2cc and then sat me back up to drink some water. The water went down fine, so she put in another cc (for a total of 3cc in a Lapband APS 10cc capacity). I drank some water again and it felt a little weird like it was not going through as fast and I felt some little bubbles, but it did not hurt. She stopped there. She told me after that she can give 2, 3, or 4 on the first visit, but most people get 3. So, I guess that makes me average.   Now, the hard part... I am supposed to be on clear liquids for 72 hours (but no juice or sugar). I am trying, but I'm not sure if I'm gonna make it that long. I already cheated a little and put a little soy milk and agave nectar in my decaf tea. I am drinking clear protein shots I got from Costco (25 grams of protein in a 3 oz tube - tastes like unset jello - 100 calories). I drink my broth or tea as my 'meal' and then the protein shot like a 'dessert'. Yeah, right, not sure how long I can last like this! :thumbup:   I'm also just curious to see if I can feel any difference when I eat from the 3cc. I might try a yogurt later today if I can't get my mind off of food after lunch. I did discover an AMAZING broth I just had for lunch. It is made by 'College Inn' and is called 'Culinary Broth' in 'Thai Coconut Curry' flavor... chicken broth infused w/a blend of coconut, curry, garlic, and coriander flavors. It has a lot of sodium, though, so I cut it half-and-half w/low sodium vegetable broth. It has great flavor, though... just the right amount of spice. OK, I am probably becomming delusional at this point from lack of calories if I am raving about a broth.
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Some things I may give up for good...

In the post-op class I took w/others that got banded by my surgeon the same week, the dietician recommended that we give up some things for just the first month after banding. And, after giving them up, I'm thinking I may just be better off without them at all:   1) Red Meat and Pork 2) Caffeine 3) Artificial Sweeteners   The funny thing is that I really missed the red meat and pork the first week because I am so used to having these options when I plan my cooking for the week. But, now, I've found all sorts of chicken and turkey products, fish, and soy products I love. And, with my high cholesterol and other health issues, am thinking maybe I am better off to just not even try to eat red meat or pork again. I think most bandsters have trouble getting them down once they have proper restriction anyway so what is the point of reintroducing these just to end up taking them away again later I figure.   Now, w/the caffeine, there have certainly been DAYS when I would have LOVED to have a cup of coffee to get me going in the morning. But, overall, it feels great to have broken this addiction. I actually crave a big glass of water in the morning now.   And, the removal of artificial sweeteners has had the most amazing effect for me. The dietician claimed that artificial sweeteners make you crave more sugar and I really didn't believe her when she said that. But, much to my amazement, she was right! I used to crave sweets all the time and now I can take 'em or leave 'em quite easily. I've been using agave nectar instead which is a natural sweetener (similar calories to sugar), but much lower on the glycemic index (so good for my prediabetes). It feels weird to add 'calories' when I know I could just throw in some splenda for 'free', but I can't argue w/the results I am enjoying. No more sugar monster!   Anyway, I'm just so surprised that I'm even considering embracing these changes long-term when I had grumbled about them in the first place.   And, I'm trying to figure out how I will handle the lamb chop dinner my mother-in-law is planning a week after my first fill. I have already told her not to worry about me when she plans meals because... (1) I really don't eat much now and (2) I can always find something that works for me out of everything she makes. It seems like everyone worries about whether their menu will agree w/me now that I have lapband and I'm the only one who is NOT worried because I know that even if there is hardly anything I can eat, I don't need much anyway.   Oh, by the way, I am down 2 more pounds as of a couple days ago. Yay!!! :thumbup:
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Crap!!! First Fill Postponed!

I was just grocery shopping when my surgeon's office called to tell me they had to reschedule my appointment (first fill). I was supposed to have it on Friday (day after tomorrow) and now it will be next Wednesday, the 27th. I'm not really annoyed... I know stuff comes up. But, I was just so excited to get it done on Friday. I feel so deflated, figuratively and literally! :confused:   I had made a point of not planning anything for the weekend so it wouldn't be a problem to not eat for 72 hours. And, now I gotta cancel my volunteer day at my daughter's school on Wednesday. And, my mom friends were planning to play Bunko next Thursday night and maybe I should cancel that too. It might just be torture to go play Bunko if I can't eat or drink anything.   OK, enough of my pity party. It is what it is. Bleeehghghghghghgh!!!
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A blessing in disguise...

I was so bummed a couple of days ago when my surgeon's office called to say that they had to postpone my fill from this Friday to next Wednesday. I would've been getting my fill right NOW, but I am so glad right now that I'm not. I woke up this morning w/terrible cramps and sooooo bloated. Yep, my TOM is here w/a vengeance. I can't even get my rings off if I wanted to.   I've heard that water retention and bloat like this can make your band feel tighter so I am so glad I am not getting my first fill right now. And, I usually only have PMS type symptoms the first day or two so I should be totally back to normal by Wednesday for sure. :thumbup:
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Lesson Learned... Skipping Lunch = Late Night Eating

One habit I've been so proud to break is the awful late night eating I used to do. I would affectionately call it my 'Fourth Meal' (like those taco bell commercials). Usually my 'Fourth Meal' was the biggest meal of my day. Actually, not really a meal at all, but endless grazing that would go on from the time my kids went to bed to when I went to bed... usually based on a little bit of hunger mixed with a whole lot of 'I deserve it'.   Well, since the band and all the pre and post-op education I received on 'head hunger', I've pretty much eliminated that 'Fourth Meal'. I think the band has genuinely made me feel satiated for longer, but also I am being a lot more mindful of trying to break this habit.   What I learned today, though, is that a skipped meal will always catch up w/me. I remember Dr. Oz talking about how eating breakfast is so important otherwise you are trying to catch up to your hunger all day. And, I'm good about eating breakfast. I can't remember the last time I missed breakfast. But, today I slept in and had a late breakfast and by the time I was thinking about lunch, it was only two more hours until dinner. So, I forced myself to make do w/just a yogurt until dinner (figuring I might save some calories today).   Boy was I wrong about that! After my dinner of grilled salmon and asparagus, I just could not shut off my hunger. A couple hours later, I grabbed a few rice chex figuring maybe my body was craving carbs. I try to keep the carbs low, but sometimes its the only way to quiet my hunger. The rice chex did NOTHING for me. So, I had a big bowl of strawberries... still hungry. OK, so I had a big bowl of more grilled asparagus leftover from dinner (figuring that would make me feel 'full')... no way! Time to bring out the big guns... Protein. So, I reheated a piece of leftover salmon. But, even the salmon does not satiate me. At this point I am feeling like the Very Hungry Caterpillar... STILL HUNGRY!!! One half bag* of Peanut M&Ms later... SO SATISFIED!!!   The moral of this story... don't skip meals! They catch up with you!!!   AND, I can't wait for my first fill on Friday. I can eat A LOT of food right now! :confused:   * Just want to clarify that was 1/2 of a normal size bag of M&Ms (like the kind you get in the checkout line at the grocery store)... not the jumbo fill your candy dish type bag. Don't want to make myself sound worse than I am. :wink2:
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20 Pounds Gone!!!

That's 13 pounds lost since my surgery on 12/17 (just over 3 weeks ago) plus 7 that I lost before surgery. Woohoo!!!
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First Stuck Episode

Just when I thought I had no resriction, I had my first real stuck episode tonight. First of all, I think I must be retaining water. I have felt bloated all day. And, I think this is what must be making me feel restricted cause I have not felt any restriction for awhile (I'm 3 weeks out from surgery and no fill yet).   Anyway, so this morning I had a baby shower to go to and when it came time to eat, I splurged on having two eggs benedict, some shrimp, and mixed fruit. I could feel the food not going down so well so I stopped eating. It was so weird for me to not finish my plate cause everything was so good.   OK, so flash forward to tonight's dinner and we had grilled salmon, grilled asparagus, pasta, and rolls. I was just gonna eat the salmon and asparagus and I could feel some of the asparagus was not so tender, but it was still going through fine. Then, I decided what the heck, I think I'll have a roll. BIG MISTAKE!!! By the time, I felt it getting stuck, I had already eaten almost the whole thing. It hurt really bad.   I excused myself to the bathroom and took my water with me. My mom had said you can take a sip of water to help it come back up if needed (she's been banded for 2 years). But, when you are stuck, the last thing you want to do is to add anything to the mix. I took some tiny tiny sips and it just made it worse. It was a weird sensation feeling the water work its way down and little bubbles coming up. I am a woos when it comes to throw-up. I don't even know how to make myself throw-up if I needed to. I remembered that someone on here says it helps to hold your hands up high in the air so I did that for awhile. That seemed to work OK and the roll finally made its way through over the course of a few minutes.   I know some stuck episodes can be a lot worse so I'm thankful this passed pretty quickly. But, I never ever want to feel that again so I am staying far far away from bread from now on. I hardly ever eat bread products anyway because I have an intolerance to wheat (makes me really tired), but just indulged today because it wasn't gonna matter if I got tired.   Anyway, this whole experience has taught me that I also really need to be careful anytime I am retaining water or feel bloated. And, I need to try to prevent that too. I think I was so bloated because I ate some really salty stuff last night which makes you retain water. And, I had wine which makes you dehydated. And, when you are dehydrated, your body reacts by retaining water too. So, I gotta really watch all that stuff now... not just for the calories (which I knew were bad), but because of how it effects your restriction.   On the bright side, I got on the scale yesterday and lost another pound! Woohoo!!!
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Good Body Day

You know how sometimes you have a 'good hair day'. Well, today has just felt like a 'good body day' all day. The scale has not budged, but I feel skinnier. My jeans were loose when I put them on this morning and so was my shirt. It was windy and kept blowing in the wind like it is all flowy on me (not sticking to my bulges like normal). LOL   After I had my kids off to school, I stopped at Ross to return a shirt I had bought that just didn't work w/the outfit I had imagined it with. I decided to do a little shopping as long as I was there and everything looked so good in the dressing room. My stomach just looks slimmer and not so bloated anymore. I got a great deal on three new tops... all a little snug so room to shrink. :biggrin:   OK, now its time to hop on the treadmill and get my 30 minutes in! :thumbup:
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Letter to My Mom

My mom just joined lapbandtalk.com. She is 'Kakaako Joan' and got the lapband two years ago and has lost over 100 pounds. We actually have the same 'bandiversary' (12/17), but mine is just two years later. And, that was all just a crazy coincidence because I certainly did not choose my surgery date. I had to go through two appeals w/Aetna and when I was finally approved, I hounded my surgeon's office until they would give me a date. :thumbup:   Anyway, I was writing my mom an e-mail tonight and realized that I should've just posted this all to my blog here so I could update you all who I am sure are all on the edge of your seats waiting for an update. So, here it is...   My weightloss has slowed down. I'm holding steady at 11 pounds lost right now (18 if you count what I lost from my highest weight), but if that's all I lose until my fill, I am happy w/that. Its more than I could lose doing anything else for one month.   I have no restriction at all now that the swelling has gone down. I get my first fill on 1/22. In the meantime, I'm just following the band rules as best I can, trying to stick to only three meals a day, no desserts, very limited starch, lots of protein, and walking on the treadmill 30 minutes/day. But, its kinda like being on WW right now cause I'm hungry in between meals. I just try to distract myself or eat protein for a snack if I get really hungry. Can't wait to get a fill and get this band working for me!   I am very happy that I've healed up so well now, though. I feel like I could do Jazzercise already, but will wait to get the OK from my doctor at my next appointment since they said absolutely nothing but walking for the first month. My stomach muscles are all healed, though. No pain and I can even sleep on my port side.
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Bandster Heck

I refuse to call it 'Bandster Hell' because its really not that bad. Heck, its just like I'm trying to diet like normal (pre-band). I refuse to journal, weigh, and calculate all my food and activity because it gives me bad flashbacks from Weight Watchers. But, I do keep a pretty keen mental awareness of how many grams of protein I am getting in, water, and calories. And, am being diligent about following the band rules. I'm trying to stay under 1500 calories per day and 70+ grams of protein. :thumbup:   I've been doing pretty good for the past couple days since NYE and all the holidays are over now. I woke up feeling like I had lost weight this morning so I got on the scale and found that I lost ONE more pound! YAY!!! :thumbup: OK, I was trying not to get on the scale more than once/week and Thursday was gonna be my weigh-in day so I certainly didn't do too well w/that seeing as today is Sunday. Maybe I better go find the SWA group now. LOL :smile2:   Oh, I also had an interesting conversation w/the cashier checking me out at the grocery store yesterday. She told me that this year she is going to climb Camelback Mountain... that she's lived here so long and its so beautiful and its about time she did it. Now, this is a short, but strenuous hike (very steep). The beautiful skinny people of Scottsdale run up and down this trail for a workout. I would probably die of cardiac arrest if I tried to even walk up it right now. But, as she said this to me, I quickly replied, 'You know, I think I should do that too.' And, it got me thinking about how much I used to like hiking and how I miss it. I even started looking up trails on the internet. I think I will pick out some easier trails first and work my way up to Camelback Mountain. And, then later this year maybe I can hike Camelback Mountain. And, if I can't make it, then the beautiful skinny people will have to carry me down! :confused:
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No More New Years' Resolutions!

For once in my life, I feel a great deal of peace about everything. I was banded on 12/17 and whatever I can achieve w/this band, will be just fine. It doesn't matter how long it takes as long as I keep moving in the right direction. Hence, there is no need for New Years' Resolutions. I will continue to strive towards moderation while being kind to myself as much as possible through this journey. :wink:   One of the psychologists at my surgeon's office said that we never have to be 'dieters' again. This has been and will be one of my biggest challenges... to give up the 'dieting' and 'all or nothing' mentality that has only been a detriment to me throughout my life. One of the buzzwords I used to hate... 'lifestyle' is something I am ready to embrace now that I have this tool that makes it possible for this 'lifestyle' to not include constant hunger. :biggrin:   I have to admit that a part of me is sooooooo curious to see where I end up at the end of this year. But, I won't pressure myself to end up at any particular spot by the end of the year. I will do the best I can and my body will do what its gonna do. And, I will enjoy the journey. :biggrin:   I wish you all Peace & Happiness in this New Year. :biggrin:
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And, the scale stands still!

:eek:Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... I'm on a plateau!!!! :biggrin:   Just kidding!!! I think this is just a sign that its time to stop weighing so often. I lost 10 pounds real quick after my surgery 2 weeks ago, but I knew it was not gonna continue like that through the whole month until my first fill. My swelling is gone and I don't have much restriction. I guess this what they call 'Bandster Hell', but I refuse to see it that way. My surgeon told me my only job this month is to heal... and to NOT worry about the weightloss. Smart woman! :biggrin:   I have started my walking program as of two days ago. The first day, I walked one time for half an hour, but was too tired to walk a second time in the evening. Yesterday, I walked for a half hour two times (once the the AM and once in the evening). I know if I keep this up and use a little willpower about the food, I can still lose maybe a pound a week (hopefully - like a normal diet) until my first fill on 1/22.   But, I guess its time to stop weighing every other day. Maybe I should make Thursday my weigh-in day. Only three more Thursdays before my first fill!!! :biggrin:
adagray

adagray

4
 

11 Days Post Op, 10 Pounds GONE!!!

Its been awhile since I posted. Its been busy, busy, busy w/my parents visiting from Hawaii.   I have become totally addicted to the scale cause my weight just keeps goind down! :thumbdown: I have forced myself to cut back to weighing every other day, though, instead of every day. But, it is such a novelty to me to see my weight drop so quickly like this. I NEVER would lose more than 1-2 pounds per week on Weight Watchers and there would be many many weeks where I would lose nothing or even gain. And, WW was soooooo hard. So far, this has been pretty easy. I'm just satisfied on so much less. Genius!   Now, over the course of my parents' visit, I have taken some liberties on my food which are not recommended by my dietition. I am allowed almost every kind of food right now, but am supposed to avoid starch, red meat, wine, and dessert. The truth is I've had a little bit of all those things. Not as an uncontrolled cheat, but w/the conscious decision that I am trying to rid myself of the 'all-or-nothing' thinking or 'dieting' thinking which has always been to my detriment.   So, last night when we went for Mexican, I did eat a few tortilla chips, but did not shovel them into my mouth the whole time we were waiting for our food. And, I ate one fish taco that was on a small corn tortilla (saved the other one to take home). The other day for lunch, my mom and I split one serving of bolognese over polenta (and it was a fancy place, so half a serving was really small) and I had two spoonfuls of creme brulee. Sorry if I am making your mouth water. :crying: But, I'm happy that this type of moderation actually works w/the band. I always wanted to moderate my intake before, but I was so damn hungry I couldn't stop at half a serving or a couple bites. :drool:   I do realize I'm in sort of a honeymoon period right now, though. My next challenge is to start my regular exercise program as soon as my parents leave (tomorrow morning). We've been doing active things... like yesterday we went to the Desert Botanical Gardens and walked A LOT! But, I know that once they leave, I've got to get a regular routine going because my normal daily activity is not nearly enough to keep my metabolism going good. You all might think I'm crazy, but I'm planning on making it my goal to exercise TWICE per day. Nothing strenuous, but do two walking sessions of at least 30 minutes... one in the AM hours and one on my treadmill while watching TV after my kids go to sleep (around 8:30). Having been on A LOT of diets before, I know my metabolism really responds to this. Its how I've broken through plateaus before. And, now that I'm a SAHM w/one kid in school and one kid in preschool, I really don't have any excuse for NOT putting more effort into exercise. For once in my life, I've got the time!!! :thumbup:
adagray

adagray

2
 

Yesterday was so busy...

I know I overdid it, but how can I help myself when it is so close to Christmas. I had my post-op class yesterday morning. There were really only two topics... A psychologist came in to discuss the difference between head hunger, real hunger, how to rate your hunger, etc. Then, a dietician came in to discuss the rules around our eating for the first month. It was all good!   And, I was feeling good so decided to stop at Costco on the way home for some stuff I need for Christmas Eve and Christmas. My parents are flying in tonight. Not staying with us, but I am hosting all day in my home on Christmas Eve and Christmas so there is a ton of meal planning and food that I need for everyone. Well, I got some of what I needed at Costco, but they were out of fresh turkeys that were big enough for what I need so I stopped at Safeway on the way home. Originally, I had planned to just get the stuff that they might run out of and then send my husband back for the rest. But, I was there and it just seemed easier to get it all done.   By the time I got home, it was 2pm and I was STARVING! I had not eaten since 8:30am and all I had then was cottage cheese. So, I took two pieces of turkey deli meat, put a little cheese in each one, rolled it up, and microwaved it. Then, proceeded to eat it AS I put the groceries away. I chewed very well, but this is so NOT what they mean by 'mindful eating'. LOL Oh well, live and learn. I know this is something I have to work on... I tend to go go go until I am about to colapse. It worked out OK this time, but the reason they don't want you to do that is you can end up eating too fast or grabbing something unhealthy because you are just out-of-your-mind with hunger.   OK, so by now my incision are killing me. All that shopping meant a lot of stooping, reaching, and lifting took a lot out of me. So, I laid down for awhile. After awhile, my husband came in and offered to take the kids out for dinner so I could rest some more. Great! But, did I rest? Nooooooo, I immediately got up and wrapped the presents I got for him and presents for my parents. More stooping, reaching, and lifting to get the presents out of their hiding places and get the wrapping stuff out of the box that was on the floor. I never realized how much I am picking stuff up off the floor!!! So, by the end of all that I was REALLY wiped out!   Last night was a torturous night sleep. I had still been taking the Lortab every night. I love anything that makes me drowsy at night. :cursing: But, I decided it was time to be done with this, so I didn't take it. And, boy did I have trouble falling asleep and I kept waking up w/an annoying dry little cough. The most annoying thing about this cough is that it REALLY hurts my port site every time I cough. So, instead of just a little cough, roll over and go back to sleep. I cough, have sharp burning pain that completely wakes me up, try to roll over (woops, cannot do that yet), and then lay there obsessing about how I am gonna get any sleep w/this cough. I took cough drops, drank water, etc., but the annoying little cough kept coming back. Ugh! :scared2:   So, hence, why I am up earlier than needed... to put an end to that torture. I have my post-op check-up this morning where they check my bandages, etc. and will ask if I can take benadryl to help me sleep now. This is what I normally take when I have trouble and my PCP says that is fine, but I want to make sure it is OK for my pouch first.   Oh, one other thing I wanted to mention is I seem to have developed an unhealthy addiction to the scale already. My water weight is finally coming off and I am seeing some lower numbers. I know from past dieting on WW that I should not be checking the scale all the time, though. It is giving me that diet/weigh-in/obsessing mentality. I might need to get rid of it!
adagray

adagray

1
 

And, drumroll please... I have restriction!!!

OK, I know it is temporary because I am only 4 days post-op so as soon as the swelling goes down, it will probably be gone. But, for now, I am enjoying it.   Today was my first day I could eat food. I had cottage cheese and smoked salmon for breakfast. I felt satisfied, but didn't really feel full or what I would consider restriction. I could've eaten more, but stopped. But, for lunch I took two pieces of turkey lunchmeat and rolled each piece around a little bit of cheese, then microwaved it. After eating these, I definitely felt full (not uncomfortable, but definitely done) and they were not big at all. My doctor was right that the more 'solid' the food is, the more full you feel and for a long time. I'm so happy! I don't know why, but I expected that I would not feel any restriction until maybe a few fills. It was just hard for me to imagine being truly satisfied on so little.   Oh, and bonus, I already met my protein requirement for the day (70 grams) and haven't even ate dinner yet. I am doing good!!! :cursing:
adagray

adagray

2
 

Its 3am and I'm eating cottage cheese...

:w00t::frown: because I CAN!!! :sad::w00t::mad:   Finally, it is Monday (4 days post-op) and I am allowed food. I never knew cottage cheese could taste so good. I was afraid to put my normal spices on it just yet, but the delicous creaminess, texture, saltiness is just perfect on its own. Yummmmmmmmm!!! :scared2:   I am taking it slow, chewing well, and not drinking water. So far, my tummy is happy, VERY happy!!! :cursing:
adagray

adagray

1
 

3 Days Post-Op - I can eat TOMORROW!!!

First off, I woke up this morning w/the worst shoulder/neck pain ever. I was never this sore in the hospital. The pain was so bad I was crying and shaking. I had to wake up my husband to help me get the heating pad on and pour my medicine out for me. Its weird that I feel like I'm at the most difficult point w/my recovery and I'm 3 days post-op. I thought it would just get better and better, but today was a big setback. I realize, though, that I had not been doing all the walking that my doctor had recommended. And, I feel like the pain med (Lortab) is slowing my bowels too much so that I am not passing the gas as fast as I should. So, I've stepped up my walking and am trying to just take tylenol sometimes instead of Lortab all the time. Its rough! And, I just hope it gets better by Tuesday when I am supposed to go for my post-op education (3 hours in the morning - I'm am gonna be miserable if this pain is not mostly gone by then.   I am also really really really sick of broth, tea, and jello now. And, my stomach is making the weirdest noises. I am so excited to be able to eat REAL food tomorrow. I am fantasizing about cottage cheese. Yes, I am desperate at this point!   I should add, though, that I am still so so very grateful to be able to have this surgery. I have no doubt that it will be soooooo worth it in the long-run. A small price to pay for the chance to get my health back. :tt1:
adagray

adagray

5
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