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About this blog

THE SWEET SPOT My journal on my expedition to Bandlandia and my adventures there. I plan to stay forever (been to Onederland many times, but I never stayed long). Join me!:see

Entries in this blog

 

11/12/08 "Before" pics

On to more pressing matters…I’m nervous about my last seminar tomorrow so I’m being lazy and spending most of the day on the computer. After lurking all over LBT today I’m now feeling the need to take my “Before” pictures or find some. I’m even thinking I might even attempt the insurmountable feat of creating an Avatar soon (isn’t that a Cartoon show?).:angry_smile: Heck, I’ve now got a Blog and I didn’t know what that was a week ago! And BTW what the heck is a Vlog people are mentioning “I love vlogging?”?? I’ll have to Google that one!   I’ve found there are very few recent pics of me…I hide from the camera, shove my youngest in front of me, or it’s in my hand…I wonder why. This is a somewhat scary proposition. So…I’ve been perusing everyone’s Before/After pics (wow you all look so different! You know I’m talking about you! What an inspiration!:cursing:) …do I wear the jeans; nope…I’ll NEVER be able to get that pic where I’m standing in one pant leg!:cursing: I’ve got the jeans for 160# still hanging in my closet and they’re not ½ the size of my current ones...hard to believe I was there less than 8 years ago (for the umpteenth time!). Do I just do the face shot…nope; unfortunately I still have a very oval face with a double chin only when I smile. Let’s be real…It’s not my face carrying this weight…I’m a pear and the skinniest part is still at the top, my head. Do I dress myself in my finest (aka full camouflage of the weight)? Or do I let it all hang out (I saw one in her underwear belly fat roll in hand...I’ll cut her a break, maybe she doesn’t own a bikini; I know I don’t!:cursing: BTW not on LBT…we have standards here!) I think I’m opting for the middle ground. I like the ones that wear the same outfit so you can really see the differences…so I guess I’ll need to wear pants I might keep…oh, wait, I guess that only leaves my spandex sweats and a tank…not so pretty…that’s one step away from the underwear lady! But maybe that’s the motivation I need!:cursing: I don’t know about you but I know I don’t see myself the way others see me…while I’m disgusted by the site of me and what I’ve done to my body…I know I still don’t see myself as fat as I am…Why is that? And when I was 70# lighter when we moved to Pittsburgh, I remember being in my youngest sisters wedding and feeling SO fat…I hate my photos from that day. Maybe Technicolor photos will help me gain perspective. So I’m gathering my courage to have my DH photograph me…I’ll let you know how it goes.:cursing:   Now I’ve just got to ask…WHAT’S UP with all those Avatars of people’s faces taken from above their heads? :cool:They are beautiful and interesting, but I started to ask myself why? Why no face pics from below…OK…looking up anyone’s nose wouldn’t be pretty! Above- Is it so no one can recognize you? Do they all have disfiguring goiters on their necks:eek:…I’m not making fun…I’m just curious. I’ve finally decided they all have double or triple chins (I’m a double) they’re hiding. I’ll have to keep this in mind when I finally figure out how to do an Avatar…I wonder how skinny I’d look from up above? But then I'd have to dye my gray roots! For now I’ll just work on the “Before”… :cursing:
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12/21/08 The Price of Beauty

It’s the wee hours of the morning and I was reminded of this incident as I completed my now-weekly ritual. Since I’m on the path of turning half a century soon, and you all now know that not much embarrasses me, I thought I’d share another thing that’s so special about being 49 ½. Hairs start growing on your body in places it never did before. No, really! I looked in the mirror one day and saw a hair growing out of my chin…AHHHH!:eek: Then, in a few months I noticed I was starting to get a few whiskers over my upper lip….DOUBLE AHHHH!:eek6: Call me lucky;:ohmy: my dark haired youngest sister says she’s had this problem for years, but being a natural blonde (probably more like natural gray now, but I’m never finding out!:sad:) I’ve apparently been blessed to avoid this up until now (I don’t feel blessed). I’m blaming this all on the one month I tried hormone replacement therapy this year…estrogen I get, but doesn’t testosterone make boys go into puberty=facial hair? The hot flashes are way easier to deal with than boy puberty! Anyway, I sought advice from everyone and this is what I got; bleach (they’re already blonde), pluck (they come back thicker), wax (I’ve yet to brave this with my legs even), or hair remover…OK, that doesn’t sound SO bad? So off to the store I went.:nonod:   Now I have to preface this next part by telling you I have VERY sensitive skin. My neck turns red every time I’ve gotten my hair colored or permed. I have the kind of skin you can write your name on (or whatever else you please) and it will show up. So do I listen to the part on the box where it tells you to do a test patch…HECK NO! I’m almost half a century…I’m wise…I don’t read directions…except the part that tells you the max time to leave it on…8 min.? Well, this is a BIG problem:sneaky:…a few more minutes couldn’t hurt, so I set the time for 10 min. It’s a little bottle of cream and the lid has a built in brush…this is a piece of cake…just like nail polish right?:mad: I brush it on my face in the offending areas…the directions say to lay it on thickly (OK, I read a little more of the directions) so I keep brushing. It now looks like I got into the canned frosting in a big way.   After a few minutes I realized that I should have brushed more carefully…you would never know I have an Art Ed degree. My lips are now on fire:target: where I ‘colored outside the lines’. So I ran to get a cold wet cloth (sounds good right?) to try and wipe it off my lips. Oww! I’ve now succeeded in smearing it on every part of my lips…note: wet cloth does not work…now I’m jumping up and down…Oww, Oww! :cryin: Tissues…where are the tissues?....Ahhh…that’s better…lips are still burning a little, and they’re starting to swell, but the fire is out. A few more minutes pass and now my face is on fire! Beauty hurts though right? I tough it out…Oww, Oww, Oww! Can’t…take it…any…longer! Quick, what did it say?:smile2: Rinse? Wipe off? Who knows? Oww, Oww, Oww, Oww! I pretty much stick the lower half of my face under the sink while I’m wildly wiping it with a tissue in one hand and a washcloth in the other. What the #%!#:cheers2: is this stuff, rubber cement? After 10 min. of rinsing and wiping I finally realize it’s off…it’s just my skin that’s still on fire! I run downstairs for some ice and after about 20 min. with a cold compress I decide to take a look. OK, you know when you kiss a guy whose got really bad beard stubble…nope, that’s not it…let me start again…you know when you put red lipstick on, but you totally miss your lips? That pretty much describes my face…oh, now add Angelina Jolie’s lips…on fire! But my skin is now as smooth and hair free as a baby’s behind!
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1/27/09 Oh, yes, they call her the Streak!

It’s almost 10am and I’m sitting here in my jammies. I just realized I have nothing I HAVE to do today…no appointments, no kids at home (yes, another school holiday yesterday):cheatfree:…I’m alone with nothing that HAS to be done! How often does that happen?:cheatfree: I don’t think I’ve been in this position since before the holidays! Now, what to do? And before you say “Must be nice!” it’s not that I have nothing to do, it’s that I have nothing I HAVE to do. Sure the laundry is calling me, my kitchen floor needs mopping, I’ve got piles of papers sitting in the hobby room that I started filing that are now spread out on the floor, but what to do? Well now that my computer is back from it’s ‘vacation’ after a month, I need to start tracking my food and exercise again (I’ve been catching up on everyone/websites this morning), and I do have phone calls that need to be made…I need to make my appointments with physical therapy (back osteoarthritis), the treadmill, but what to do? No one’s here…maybe I’ll go streaking through the house naked on my way to a bubble bath in the jacuzzi…oh, yeah…I'm still a 'Before'...and there’s that full glass front door I had to have…:Banane37:
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3/27/09 Do you measure up?

Does the sight of this lovelly belt send shivers down your spine? But it says 'You can add extra holes.' And look, I think it goes ALL the way out to 15"! Thinspiration? And for my metric friends, they have your size too... Hey, why stop there...let's place it around the hips! Quiz: What's the scariest part of this picture? A. The tape measure belt? B. The fact that this person has no belly button? (I'm guessing tummy tuck and they didn't want to pay the extra moohla for a new button?) The "Anna Rexia" costume with a tape measure belt...that's just so wrong! Now MAYBE once my pants are this baggy and if I don't have a buckle... And for my friends in our Bunny Bandsters April group... OK, I could totally wear this bracelet. My wrists are tiny...but that's the only thing on me that is! What's next...shoes with digital scale displays ontop?!!
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1/11/09 Packing B***h!

Today’s the day. I’m sad, I’m gloomy, and I need some comfort food, which is why we ate homemade lentil soup for lunch. I know, soup can no longer be the comfort food of choice post-band…slider and all that, but it’s perfect on a cold, snowy, bummer day like today. DD just left with DH to take her back to college. It’s been a fun three weeks of coloring hair, going to the movies, renting chick flicks, lunch out- just the girls, shopping, and yes, cooking. Now it’s all over…back to my ‘Boys Club’ here at home. Waaah!     The only thing that always makes this parting easier is that she’s a ‘packing b***h’ like the generations of women in my family. We’re a little OCD and like everything ‘just so’ when we’re packing. We’re not the type who could even fathom just ‘throwing a few things in a suitcase’ and hour before leaving for the airport. Therefore, we get very stressed out when packing to leave for anywhere and it brings out the absolute worst side of us.   I remember from the time I was tiny my Mom fighting with my Dad every time we left for a vacation. My Dad would always be sitting in the car with all of us honking the horn while my Mom was vacuuming her way out of the house. She would finally come out, angry, red faced, and with the last few items she’d thought of for Dad to fit in the already overstuffed car. Like me, a few minutes into the trip she was fine…I could hear her loud sigh and I knew everything was good. My Mom has always had everything we could possibly need when we arrived (usually for a camping trip-one huge canvas tent with all seven of us in it) and I marveled even then how organized she was…I guess with 5 kids you had to be. She always had everything we needed.   I got the ‘packing b***h” gene…in spades. Even worse, I also got the gene from my Dad that compels me to write everything down and pigeon hole things to the nth degree (a deadly combination). Yes, my Dad danced a jig as he saw the birth of the sticky note! He has to have a certain kind of calendar every year, because it fits the tiny sticky notes perfectly…I’m not quite that bad, unless you count the fact that I have labels for every row of food in my walk-in food pantry…OK, I’m that bad (the Doc ought to have a feild day with me at my Psych pre-op tomorrow huh?). I’ve had a packing list on my computer since our first vacation; I update it, print it out for every trip, and check each item off as I start packing weeks before a trip (thanks Dad). I am a total grump, OK ‘packing b***h’, the day before and day we’re leaving (especially if we’re leaving somewhere I want to be)…DH now knows just to steer clear of me, keep the kids out of the way, and ask me if I need help every once in a while. My house is never so clean as when I leave for a trip (thanks Mom)…what if you died and company had to come to your house…would you want them to see how messy you left it?...Mom’s words. Yes, I am my mother. Like my Mom, I’m fine once we’re on the road…I let out that sigh and I’m instantly on my trip/vacation/whatever. Even better, once we’re there I AM Mary Poppins as my extended family has dubbed me. Ask me for anything, I dare you to, I’ll have it. Once we were sitting at one of those Japanese steakhouse places at WDW. My nephew put his hand on the grill in front of us even though they’d warned us 100x that it was hot. My sister, who didn't get either of these genes, asked if I had anything as she was planning a frantic trip across the park to the first aid station. Did I have anything?!!! I had tissues to dry his eyes, antibiotic wipes to clean it, I had antibiotic lotion WITH the pain anesthetic, I had bandages of every size, I had pain reliever pills for Jr. kids even…after the ice, I hooked him up and we were good to go…Mary Poppins! (thanks Mom & Dad)   DD has definitely got the ‘packing b***h’ gene…I went in her room this morning to chat and started helping her put the clean laundry on hangars…I wasn’t doing it right…then I wasn’t sorting them right…when I turned off her TV to pack it up all he!! broke loose. Eventually I was asked to leave the room so she could ‘just get packed on my own’. ‘Packing B***h!’ It’s OK, in fact it makes the parting easier for her…she’s leaving us, I get it, I’ve been there. As she was giving me a long hug goodbye she whispered in my ear ‘I’m sorry I yelled at you earlier Mom.’ and then with a kiss it came…the sigh…it was all good…she was ready to get back to her life at school.
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12/9/08 How many sizes are in your closet?

OK, after noting my lack of pants that fit yesterday (see previous blog) it got me thinking about how many sizes I’ve kept over the years. I decided to go check (in hopes of being able to wear a few someday:bored:). We’ve moved seven times since we’ve been married (I was a bean pole then 5'9"/132#...I've lost and inch and gained a ton), and yep, I got rid of clothes every time we moved …and yeah, my college daughter has permanently borrowed some of my better skinny clothes…and yep, we give clothes to charity every year…so WHY do I still have so many sizes?:cursing: OK, I’ve done the yo-yo thing for decades (obvious from my closet) and, let’s see, the lowest I’ve been in this decade was 160#, but even then, I wore a size 16 on a skinny day. So WHY do I still have size 10’s hanging in my closet??!!!:blushing: I actually have at least one pair of every size between 10-2x (that’s 14 different sizes). OK, I try to buy “Longs” when I can find them, and they’re so hard to find I’ve had a hard time giving them up (saved mostly a few dress ones or jeans)…but GET REAL, size 10’s!??:biggrin: Do you know how much DUST:blushing: was on the top of that pants hangar? I’ve always carried my weight in my lower half…I think I was barely in a size 10 when I was 130#! So there’s my new end goal…I’ll even settle for a 10/12 with an elastic waistband…wow, doesn’t seem even possible! :thumbup: Well, at least my pants are all sorted by size now…next year I plan to start working my way down that rack!:wink:
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6/25/10 My Wrinkles

*Portion of Post Deleted for Lap Band Book   Come on...sing it with me!!! Cracking open the 'box of wine' for you all now...there's no such thing as too early...hold those glasses still GF's...happy weekend! OK, now you're singing...and dancing...WHOOT! YouTube - Wrinkled Ladies
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11/17/08 So Why Am I Insulted?

I got this call and the lady explains it’s about the health surveys we had to fill out for our insurance about a year ago. :incazzato: I’m thinking, OK maybe me going to the info. seminar at the hospitals triggered something since I filled in insurance info. on their form? Then she goes on to tell me my health survey tells them “You’re at risk for several things” (very nebulous… :cursing:“things”) and “Would you like to sign up for our free program?” :sneaky:At this point I’m trying to confirm this is not some phone scam---free program:glare: (yeah right), but I don’t want to piss the woman off either…heck I don’t know if it’s someone who works and my DH-Mr.SA’s company even (I’m thinking do they have health people in HR there?). “Could you tell me more about what this program is exactly?” I ask. :prrr: After dancing back and forth a few times (now I’m really wondering if it’s a scam) she finally offers up some details “Someone will call you with regular phone appointments and they can help you with your issues….” ISSUES? I have ISSUES?? :ugh: I don’t respond as I’m thinking this and so after a long pause she timidly says “…things like exercise and diet”. The magic word DIET. She thinks I need to go on a DIET? :banghead: I’m insulted! :puke: My mind is racing… Who is this stranger telling me I need to go on a DIET? I don’t know what to do now…so again, I blurt…(I’m really stressing now—so spoken at 100 miles per hour…) “Well I’m working with my PCP and have started a diet and exercise program…I’m going to get the Lap Band…and I’m not sure how your diet and exercise would fit in with that?” :willy_nilly: I'm nice, but inside I’m so insulted. But wait…now it’s sinking in…I’m realizing it’s not a scam…if she wanted money, she certainly wouldn’t be insulting me like this, would she?!!! Uh, oh. She’s legit. :cryin: Better be nice. She says “Well, they can help you with things like stress even.” STRESS? :incazzato:WHAT STRESS?!!! She must have detected the stress in my voice…I’m thinking…Go to your happy place, :closedeyes:deep breath… “Uh, stress, OK, fine.” I say. “Someone will call you in a week to get started.” and she explains it's a service the co. pays for through insurance...we say our goodbyes. I hang up and I’m thinking why do I feel so insulted…then I realize:der:….NO ONE has ever told me I need to go on a diet…not in my entire life…it was always my idea to go on a diet...it was like someone calling me fat to my face for the first time ever! :dita: Wow! Reality check!! :blushing:OK, she didn't make up the numbers I put on the health questionaire...I welcome the help…diet, exercise, stress even…bring it on! I get it, I AM fat, I know that!...but I ask myself again...So why am I insulted?:yikes:
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2/24/09 It's Fat Tuesday!

Is it a holiday for fat people like me? Well, kinda...coming from my Catholic upbringing, I can tell you it's all about the last indulgence before abstinence and fasting...Fat Tuesday before Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent. All of you Lap Banders who have participated in a "Last Supper" or better yet a whole "Bucket List" of special meals before banding should be able to relate. "Fat Tuesday" translates to "Mardi Gras" in French and is the last day of Carnival (it's also called Shrove Tuesday and Pancake Day). So party it up...just don't indulge too much...or there'll have to be more abstinence and penance! Now where's that King Cake? King Cake: As part of the celebration of Mardi Gras, it is traditional to bake an oval cake in honor of the three kings - the King Cake. The shape of a King Cake symbolizes the unity of faiths. Each cake is made from twisted strands of cinnamon dough, topped with icing decorated in the traditional Mardi Gras colors: purple represents justice, green represents faith and gold represents power. A small baby, symbolizing the baby Jesus, is baked into each cake and whoever finds the baby (like the Kings) is rewarded with good luck. Val Kilmer partied it up in New Orleans this weekend as King Bacchus XLI on the Krewe of Bacchus' legendary Mardi Gras float. (Go Batman!)
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2/6/09 NUT, Pulmonary, PT- Making the Rounds

Yesterday I had my NUT and Pulmonary appointments at the hospital and then my PT appointment. The NUT one I’ve really been looking forward to as it seems like each surgeon’s NUT here has different plans for patients to follow, so I was anxious to see what my diet would be (some NUT’s diets here seem a little crazy to me). I’ll have to tell you that I came away VERY happy.   Here are the basics of my plan: PHASE 1 (1-2 wks) Goal is hydration (64oz fluids). Clear sugar-free liquids, skim milk, fruit & vegetable juice (all these count toward liquid ttl). Start chewable multi-vitamins. NO protein goal (she says you have enough nutrients stored that you’re fine for a week or two), NO protein shakes. PHASE 2 (about wks 3-4) Goals to transition to food, increase nutrition. Use all phase 1 foods (64oz. liquids) plus mushies. Eat 6 small meals with portions ¼-1/2 C, and only eat for 30 min. No liquids 1 hr. before, during, and after meals. Protein – at least a few Tbs-up to ¼ C/meal, then other mushies. NO protein shakes. PHASE 3 (about wk 5 or 6) Goal adequate nutrition and weight loss. Continue liquids rules/amounts, 3 meals no snacks, <1200 cal, <1.5 C ttl. per meal. At least (per day): 6-9oz (about ¾-1C) protein, 1C Vegetables, 1C fruits, 1.5C grains/starches, 3tsp Fats. NO protein shakes (not expected to meet all these amounts/goals until about week 5). Avoid: high fat/sugar (in moderation and add to cal. for the day), stringy/tough/course foods you can’t tolerate (may be able to eat if you chew very well).   So here’s why I’m so happy with it. I’m basically following the new food pyramid (with smaller amounts/cal. to lose the weight) so it’s a very balanced diet. Basically no healthy food is completely off limits unless you can’t tolerate it (i.e. Raw celery may be too stringy, untoasted bread may be too doughy, but some CAN tolerate/eat these). I hate most low-fat condiments so I just need to use less and figure the cals into my daily totals. Did you get that I don’t HAVE to drink Protein Shakes…EVER, and she said even though they’re protein, they are high in calories compared to the satiety you get from them…they are sliders so you will feel hungry way sooner than with a food protein (I couldn’t understand why people are still drinking these years later, but whatever works for them). So far, this was the diet I was hoping for. Just healthy eating in smaller portions! We’ll see about the pre-op diet when I go to the pre-op class.   Pulmonary was simple as I’ve been to this Specialist before. I have Adult-onset Asthma and found out at the same time that I am very allergic to everything environmental (diagnosed with both in ’07 after 12 weeks of bad coughing...more debilitating than you think) and after several misdiagnosis’. My lungs have been so much better with my daily meds. Sleep lab is a pre-op my surgeon requires. My PCP had already sent me this past fall to the sleep lab as I was having a lot of trouble sleeping and my Dad has very bad sleep apnea (apparently I just snore a little, no apnea). Once I started the next month on meds. for my chronic migraines one of the side effects from that drug is deeper sleeping, so that’s helped me a lot with getting back to sleep (I think the back/shoulder problems I have wake me up, so maybe the PT I’m doing will help as well).   So two more pre-ops down, and only the Cardiologist visit next week and then my Pre-Op class left in April!   Oh, I got my neck and shoulder x-rays back before going to the PT yesterday...small amount of arthritis/degeneration in my shoulder, no problems with the shoulder blade, and the PT was right, the main issues are in my neck right where she thought (C5,6,7). I have arthritis, bone spurs, degeneration, one bone that has slid back a little and disc space narrowing which is pinching the nerves...that's what gives me the pain in my shoulder, down my arm and the numbness in my hand. The neck...which doesn't really bother me...who knew?
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5/24/09 Speed Racer

I jinxed myself. Here I am giving you all advice about driving, signs and the traffic on this holiday weekend. DD went camping and boating to a lake here in PA (about 3 hours from here) with a bunch of her friends this weekend. She drove a group and the last thing I said to her was ‘Drive safely!’ An hour later I got a call…her voice was shaking and it freaked me out ‘Mom?’...me ‘IS EVERYONE OK?!!’…Her ‘I got a SPEEDING TICKET!!!’ …me…just breathing again. It was her first ticket. Remember how I told you all to watch the speed limits as you drove through unfamiliar streets? Hmmm…should have reminded her. She was on one of those 4 lane rural roads that has stop lights and a few businesses every once in awhile to somewhere she’s never been. The speed limit kept changing from 65 to 55…well she was caught speeding in a 45 mph zone; didn’t see the sign changing the speed limit. She was so upset…of course ‘everyone around her was going the same speed’. It’s a good lesson. We had a ‘teachable moment’ discussion and she calmed down. I only hope it doesn’t hinder her from getting good car insurance when she moves out of here and can’t be on our policy anymore. I’m just SO relieved it wasn’t a wreck and everyone is safe. Oh, and the 8 yards of mulch is FINALLY done…we’re all exhausted, but now we can enjoy what’s left of our long weekend. I soaked in the jacuzzi tub for a half-hour and my muscles still hurt…black mulch…looks beautiful, but I have no fingernails left and my hands, even with garden gloves on, won’t come clean.
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3/13/10 This Week's Blogs

- Telling - Wednesday Words (Misc.) - The Incredible Shrinking Woman - Endoscopy Schmendoscopy   Enjoy!   All here: http://bandgroupieth...t.blogspot.com/
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1/29/09 I've Got Curves!

Sure, we’ve all heard people here who, through the course of their pre-op testing, have gotten new diagnosis’ for ailments they didn’t even know they had. Sometimes it’s even helpful with insurance approval :cheatfree:(yep, me). I’ve even counseled others to have their doctor order at least basic blood test as they might have high cholesterol, or indicators of diabetes. Remember I got a new diagnosis of hypertension at the beginning of my journey.   At my last PCP monthly check we discussed my comorbidities (that word sounds like we’re all dying doesn’t it...OK so maybe it's appropriate:huh2:). One of my minor ones that has gotten worse with weight is my osteoarthritis in my lower back. Adding to that is the fact that I was put on preventative medication last fall for my migraines. Suddenly I was no longer needing to take the usually daily pain medications, often strong migraine ones. So although my migraines have virtually disappeared my back pain is worse without the pain relievers. The PCP suggested I try Physical Therapy, which I’ve never done before. She ordered a new set of x-rays of my lower back/lumbar to be sure I didn’t have any disc problems and because my last set was 10 years ago, in another state.   I got a call from the nurse at the PCP’s office… “We have your x-ray results. They did find the osteoarthritis in several places, but no disc problems.” Pause “And I’m sure you already know about the scoliosis.” Pause…….:Banane37: me trying to process this…thinking…isn’t that the thing we always got tested for as kids…yep, the thing where your spine bends to one side….pause….(me) “No, I didn’t know. What is scoliosis?” (nurse) “It’s where your spine is curved.”…still trying to process… (me) “So is this obesity related or age?”…now grasping at straws… “And is there something I need to do about it?” (nurse) “Yeah you can get this as you age and you just need to do more of those weight bearing exercises.”:iagree: (she said like it was no big deal) …I’ve got nothing:out:…(me) “OK.”   So I somehow decided in my mind that I probably just have swayback from my weight and huge ass (Sounds plausible, right? I don’t need a diagnosis to tell me I could serve cocktails on my bum). Well, with all the stuff going on with the kids and doctors this month I’ve put off scheduling the Physical Therapy. So today, after the snow delay I took some time ask some questions online and start researching this.:Banane37: Apparently I do not have swayback, which is called lordosis, or even a hunchback, well it wasn’t my upper back anyway, which is called kyphosis (although it was Notre Dame where I had my 'moment' that brought me to the LB, but that's another story). Nope, and I’m sure it’s no biggie, but I now have a curve to the side, which is called scoliosis. Yep, I’ve got curves! Tell a fat girl something she didn’t already know!:cheatfree:
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2/25/09 Smoke and Mirrors

I’m always amazed by what I start off thinking I’m going to write and then what I end up writing about here. It’s the thing I like best about blogging…not only do you get your feelings/questions out, but it’s often a total surprise. Today was no exception. I started off wanting to explore something that came up in my last blog…the fact that at the same time I hate to look at my current self in the mirror, I don’t feel fat…in my head…and how could I still be constantly surprised by photos of me? ‘Nuff said about that!!! As I went looking for a photo of a fun house mirror (to illustrate my body dysmorphic disorder...or maybe it’s just my split personalities) I found this out:   DRESSING ROOMS AROUND THE COUNTRY HAVE ‘SKINNY’ MIRRORS!!! Oh yes!! They’re scamming us!!! I finally am having a good day clothes shopping! I look like a size 16 in my size 22 jeans at the store, so as I’m skipping happily around the dressing room I decide to buy 3 pair, and come home to find my size 22 butt looks like an elephant wearing dolls clothes.       Here’s how they do it…tip a mirror forward and you look short and fat, tip it backward (even slightly) and you look taller and thinner. And to make it worse, some stores even use slightly curved mirrors…oh yea, just like the FUN HOUSE ones! It’s all an illusion…it’s a house of mirrors!! Is it illegal…no…they make no promises that you’ll look the same at home as you do in their dressing room.     I’m sure I’m the last one on Earth to find this out. As I found article upon article upon this I was finding an increased hatred of dressing rooms. Remember my ‘love’ of dressing rooms anyway (one word…sportsbra…or maybe that’s two words); then I also found the results of a study on women and dressing rooms: 64 percent said trying on clothes in public lowers their self confidence
10 percent have cried in dressing rooms about the way they look
40 percent of the women have bought something that was too small, hoping it would look good once they lost weight
14 percent of the women have refused sales help so they wouldn't have to reveal their size
41 percent have started working out after a shopping trip
and the best one of all… 15 percent have accidentally ripped or gotten stuck in a garment that was too small
I’m just glad I’m not alone…and I’m staying OUT of dressing rooms for awhile…at least until I KNOW I’m skinnier…I have enough body distortion issues.
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7/27/09 Murphy and the Grad Party- Part II

Part II...   Nothing to be done, but to move on…I started prepping for the party…by Wednesday I had the garage tables all covered, skirted and set up and DS2 had all the decorations and streamers up. Oh, and being a ‘visual’ person I had all the chafing dishes out with sticky notes everywhere showing where each item would be (OK, I say ‘visual’, you say ‘anal’…just remember, I now knew I had to get as ready as possible as the quilt was still waiting). I bought all the food I could early and then Thursday I cut and pinned as many pieces for the quilt as I could.   Sis arrived Friday at lunchtime and we got started on our “Quilting Bee”. Thank God for her as we always have a fun time and can get each other laughing in the midst of a crisis (OK, not life and death, but I’ve set the bar people…a quilt is expected!). I sewed, she unpinned and kept me sane (translation = make sure none of the T-shirt were upside down...whe was amazed at all the math involved and how I figured this out without a pattern...math is not my subject). By Friday night we had all the T-shirts and white canvas together. We even took a break to prep some of the food and watch the Weather Channel…Oh yeah, Mr. Murphy (Murphy's Law) was messing with me again….(or you can skip this part and just know I’m doubly cursed and I’m a huge klutz)   - We’d of course been watching the weather all week and it went from bad to worse… ‘60% chance of pm thunderstorms’.   - DH was trying to make more room in the fridge for all the food, so he poured me an enormous glass of red wine to finish off the bottle. I took it in to work on the quilt (on the Dining Room table) while he and Sis went to rent a movie. I was sewing along when the doorbell rang and startled me, so I quickly got up to get the door….as I was leaving I caught a pin on my clothing and the quilt followed me…at the edge of the table…yep, the red wine! It fell and hit the seat of a wooden chair from the kitchen Sis had been using and broke. My poor neighbor at the front door (he was bringing me tables for the party) must have thought I was nuts as I answered the door in hysterical laughter (what else can you do but laugh). Luckily, the only fabric that got wine on it was a bit of the black framing and backing, so no harm done when I washed it off, but there was wine all over the Dining Room and up the walls. - Sis laughed until she couldn’t breathe when she got back and heard the story and scolded me for putting the wine on the table with the quilt ‘What were you thinking?’…at that point I had no brain left ‘I wasn’t!’ We called it a night.   - Saturday morning broke and it was the day of the party. I awoke at 4am with a migraine (stress and lack of sleep are a deadly combination). I couldn’t even move until about 6am and by then DH was up and helped me out…I was able to choke down a piece of bread and took my medicine (can’t take it on an empty stomach). Then I was violently vomiting, well, make that heaving hard with nothing coming up (one of my least favorite side effects of the LB, but it kept the medicine down so it was a positive). I went back up to lie in a dark room. Two hours later I was able to move again, but barely.   - The weather forecast had gotten even worse as they added ‘Gale force winds and damaging hail possible.’ to the thunderstorm forecast. We watched as the red Doppler was headed straight for us. We watched the 'local on the 8's' so many times we were soon reciting it with them...everyone now...'60% chance of pm thunderstorms with GALE FORCE WINDS AND DAMAGING HAIL POSSIBLE!'   - We got whatever setup and food prepped that we could and then went to frame and back the quilt. That’s when I stepped on a piece of wine glass I’d missed the night before and cut my big toe. There were blood droplets all over the carpet and we couldn’t get the bleeding to stop. I finally stuck my foot up on the table to raise it as I was still sewing… ‘Quite the picture of determination! There’s blood, sweat and tears in this quilt!’ Sis said (I’m sending her a nice restaurant gift certificate as I would have thrown it away long ago without her).   - I got the framing done, batting in, and the back on. The opening on the back was only pinned together and the actual quilting stitching wasn’t done, but no one knew the difference. I was just so relieved when we hung it on the garage wall.   - Our families started arriving around 1pm with the pouring rain and winds. At 5pm (party started at 6pm) we had a break in the rain and I decided to chance it and made the decision to set up outside (against the judgement of others in my family who thought I was doomed for a big storm...hey, I'm the eternal optimist remember...and I was figuring we could always ask people to grab a chair to bring in if it rained). Our families were great help in that last hour and we got all the food set up on heat or ice in the garage and everything else done outside..   The party was great. We had neighbors, family and lots of DS1’s friends. I had balloons, decorations, the DVD going in the garage where the quilt was also hung. The buffet was huge (too much food as usual, please come over for leftovers or we’ll be eating it for a month). DS1 has a sweet tooth and so besides my two tables of food we had a third table with the cake, a chocolate fountain with lots of things to dip and an ice cream sundae/cone bar. Outside we had lots of balloons and covered tables/chairs on our big drive and on the patio. We setup volleyball, baggo sets, and the football toss (that new string/rungs game). DS1’s one request was for a cotton candy machine so we had one of those too.   It was all worth it when I saw DS1 watching the DVD with a group of his friends and caught him later in the evening reading all the messages his friends had been writing for him on the quilt. We were all amazed at what a hit the cotton candy machine was…he manned it many times during the night and the kids would line up for their cone of ‘candy floss’ (my 6 year old godson had 8)…DS1 was covered in sugar by the time he was done. As night fell we lit the tiki torches, candles everywhere even floating on the pone and the fire pit for s'mores. We only had a few sprinkles all night that lasted a few minutes each time, but not even bad enough to move inside, so the weather (and Murphy) was finally smiling on us and I got really lucky…it wasn’t even windy…it was the perfect evening. I didn't have time to take a single pic, but I made sure others were doing this for me, so hopefully I can post a few soon.   My party outfit...   I’m exhausted, but DH and I got almost everything back to normal yesterday. I have survived and am victorious! Well, everything but the stupid weight…yep, still not in Onederland…I’ve been up and down the same two or three pounds for weeks now (201.5 today...grrr). Third fill tomorrow!!!!
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1/2/09 Winding Down

We had the last of the holiday shindigs yesterday, played our last board game (DD and I lost at “Battle of the Sexes”...stupid sports questions!...but the guys had no idea what to use to stop a run in a stocking- HA!) and I’m exhausted. My asthma couldn’t tolerate the fresh tree another day (my kids say I’m officially now a cough drop addict…do they have a 12 step program for that?...actually, I do think the lining of my mouth is getting burned from all the menthol eucalyptus!) so I defrocked the tree and stuffed it out the door. The un-decorating is so depressing really, isn’t it? My house is now a wreck of half-undecorated rooms, bins everywhere waiting to be repacked, cookie and candy crumbs in every corner, and let’s not mention those pine needles I’ll still be vacuuming up in June (Where the flip do they keep coming from?). As much as I’m the holiday queen, I’m always happy when things are back to normal…or maybe I’m just tired? So promise me I’ll have more energy next year when I have some of this weight off…won’t that be nice…turning 50 and having MORE energy…sweet! …zzzz:sleep:
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7/26/10 Monday Musings

I can't believe it's been a month since my last post here...I guess because there's not been nothing new on the Band front since the partial unfill and I try to make sure my posts have something Band related here.   - As of an hour ago, we've now got a last minute trip scheduled to the shore before school starts. My SIL/DH just bought a place this summer at Cape May so we're going to meet them there not this, but next Thursday...guess I'll be breaking out the bikini again...yikes.   - I'm back to writing (the LB book) with a new vengeance today...I wrote all morning about maintenance and outlined a bunch of new things as well. I've learned that taking a break from writing can be a good thing and that I can't force feed it...I'm sure real authors can and have ways to keep themselves inspired, but my busy life this summer was making it impossible to carve out chunks of uninterrupted (read 'three teen/twenties' constantly interrupting me) time to get creative and it was getting stale and tedious...and that's just not me!   - I stopped by Barnes and Noble today to pick up a few Lap Band books to start reading at the shore...and was surprised to find they didn't have ANY (the only WLS book they even carry was 'WLS for Dummies' and after perusing it for a half-hour I realized it wasn't worth buying...nothing we all haven't heard as it's a very generalized book about all WLS). I've been putting off reading any LB books until I had at least the full outline/structure of the book all worked out so that I wouldn't be influenced or start questioning myself. It's probably for the best they didn't have any as my DH's family doesn't know about the blog or the book and they'd be wondering why I was reading these post-op. I'll just have to order some to read this Fall.   - I keep forgetting to share a few things, like I went shopping again right before I left for Ohio. Ten more tops and a sundress.   *Portion of Post Deleted for Lap Band Book   - Also, I'm not sure if I told you that I called and moved my 'refill' appointment up...a month. It's tomorrow afternoon. I've got lots of thoughts on the refill and what I'm aiming for this time (I've got some new thoughts on where I was/want to be), but I'll save the details for now. Here's hoping the Doc doesn't toss me out on my ear when he sees I'm in a month earlier than he said...I'll let you know.   - Oh and I've gone from a full 7 pounds up to reining it in to about 3-4 now...Doc will probably say I'm doing fine LOL.   Happy Monday all!
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12/29/08 It looks like someone threw up ornaments on our tree!

Kids say the darndest things…wasn’t that Art Linkletter’s show? I’ve been ‘waxing nostalgic’ here over all the holiday traditions and reminiscing over stories from holidays past in many of my blogs lately and today's no exception. As my DD and I were standing in the foyer today looking at the huge tree she began pointing out some of her favorite ornaments from years past. What a lovely moment we were having as once again we fondly remembered stories that went with each ornament, the giver, the funny story behind it, or why it had special meaning. Then she turns to me with a smile and says “Mom, it looks like someone threw up ornaments on our tree!”…I laughed and said “What does that mean?” “Well, most people have a tree that has a theme or something that ties it all together.” she continued “You need another tree or something; there’s SO MANY ornaments.” I gave this some thought…Well, I have some things that tie it together; the dried baby’s breath that looks like snow, the huge bow at the top with ribbons cascading down and all the little bows, the red candles clipped to the branch ends and there are those popcorn strings we strung so many years ago and still use. Then I thought about other trees…I have a neighbor who has a beautiful tree with nothing but Hallmark ornaments she’s collected for years, and another neighbor with matching balls that are color coordinated to her room decorating. I do have that tiny kitchen tool tree on my counter, and Mr.SA has his collection of nothing but wooden Steinbach German ornaments on his skinny tree in the Family Room, but she’s right…our huge fresh-cut tree is packed full with so many ornaments of all shapes and themes. I make ornaments out of everything. There’s the gods-eye made with sticks and multi-colored yarn that I made when I was at Girl Scout Camp one summer and the tiny red license plate with Mr.SA’s name that used to hang from the seat of his very first bicycle. There’s the favorite bunny pacifier holder that was always pinned to my youngest DS’s shirt and the pink sparkly barrette that DD bought me at her Secret Santa shop at school one year. There are the little baubles we picked up in each of the countries at EPCOT and something from every other family trip we’ve been on. Of course there are all the ornaments we’ve made or bought for each other over the years. Yes, my tree is just like my house and its many collections…I explained to her it does have a theme…memories…and lots of them.
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11/14/08 Fall reminds me of college!

I got my two boys out this afternoon mowing & sucking up all the fall leaves with me since we’re having a heat wave-60 degrees high (rain or snow tomorrow; 30’s high next week). Florida Pete I don’t want to hear a word!:w00t: We have a hill with huge trees behind us so you could hardly see the grass for all the leaves. There’s something about the smell of slightly wet leaves that always reminds me of college…I guess it’s that back to school smell. When I was younger it was “paste”:wub:...I’m aging myself again aren’t I?…Hey, do they even MAKE school paste anymore?:huh2:   We’re been doing the final college visits now with my middle one (boy); the one I mentioned just got into National Honor Society this week (sorry, proud). My DH (Mr. SA) is taking him on his last two different visits this weekend (wish I was going, but my youngest has a commitment). It’s good kids know what they want; he wants a huge school, my daughter is a senior at mid-size one. She would tell me to insert a shameless resume here…but I’ll keep it to anyone looking for a bright employee: double major-marketing/intl. business, let me know (She’ll have me on the street corner wearing a sandwich board for her soon). What a bad time to graduate and be seeking employment huh?...but I envy them those wonderful college years!   So fall reminds me of walking around my college campus and all the expectations of a new school year. I was thinking today that starting this LB process now in the fall brings a lot of the same feelings I had then; anticipation, hopefulness, eagerness, anxiousness, etc. So I’ll use this school year to get educated (about LB) and for now I’m just hoping I’ll be “graduating” to a new part of my life…just about the same time as my two oldest ones! :cool::w00t::cool:
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12/24/08 Twas the Night Before Christmas...

I’ve finished all the baking…yes, I know…Me? Baking?...yes, I told you all about my baking disasters here, but just because I like to get creative, that doesn’t mean I can’t follow a recipe. I even made my Mom’s famous “Teacher’s Pet” apple coffee cake for Christmas morning…so moist and yummy! The table is already set complete with Christmas crackers. I’m getting ready to cut up the three loaves of bread so it can dry overnight for my sage stuffing that goes in the turkey. If I’m feeling good about the cooking then all is well in the world (since we all know what a great cook I am…hee hee)!   My youngest and I have been tracking Santa in 3D on Google Earth/Norad…see how far I’ve come this year with technology! Right now Santa is over Ile de la Possession… ‘Possession’? That’s appropriate for Santa bringing new possessions…ha ha! Had to look this place up…FYI…it’s a small island that’s part of the Crozet Islands archipelago in the middle of the Southern Indian Ocean. “The island itself is very small, and features such memorable locations as Mount Mischief, the Jules Verne Mountains, the Moby Dick River, and the Lac Perdu (LostLake), which flows out to sea via the River Styx!” See…we’re tracking Santa and learning geography all at once!   Boy that Santa moves fast…good thing he’s got Rudolph leading the way tonight as we’re having a horrible rainstorm here. All that snow we’ve had since early fall and now no snow for Christmas…ahh well. We’re putting another log on the fire…time for a hot spiced cider! Hope you all have a wonderful Holiday Season!
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5/8/10 Blog Updates and I need input for the Book

Here are some blog updates. Remember, anyone can read these and you can comment under the 'anonymous' choice if you don't have a Google account (just keep pushing the button after you post and it will give you a word verification.   As you know, I'm now working on trying to write a LB book (after a year of messages from all of you suggesting it LOL). I would really appreciate it if you could send me some information (you can do this here, or with a PM, comment on the blog, or via my email) as I go along...I routinely ask questions so I can gather input for the book as I want this to represent all our journies as much as possible. The two blogs marked with * below, are where I need some input currently. THANK YOU! -BG Blog here: THE SWEET SPOT   5/7/10 Lock Me Up...I'm a Smuggler! (Patio projects) *5/5/10 Pre-Op Process (Dr. Clearance & Testing) *5/4/10 Pre-Op Process (Self-Pay or Covered) 5/3/10 Of Mice and Men (and Brother, Sisters...and Parents) (Helping Parents get ready to sell their home 4/27/10 Happy Birthday! 4/24/10 Don't Have any Wild Parties...(going home)
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