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About this blog

THE SWEET SPOT My journal on my expedition to Bandlandia and my adventures there. I plan to stay forever (been to Onederland many times, but I never stayed long). Join me!:see

Entries in this blog

 

12/14/08 To "Diet" or not to "Diet"...

Well, I’ve been thinking about starting to track my calories on one of those food tracking sites. I’ve been reading that so many here do this…heck some of them even track their food and every calorie they burn exercising and just walking around. So I’m thinking, I’m committed…I can do WHATEVER it takes to make sure I’ll be successful with the Lap Band…I’m not afraid of working hard…heck, I just bought a fancy pedometer. They want me to track every calorie…I can do that, I’ve done it before…I’ve done WW, Atkins, and Alli among others. I’ve tracked calories before. I was pretty successful at some of those diet plans…I’m the expert dieter…I can stick to a diet like nobody’s business…I can even up to 50 pounds on a diet, it’s just the keeping it off that I have trouble with. I’m as anal as they come…I love lists and spreadsheets. I never much enjoyed the time it takes to track every calorie, but if that’s going to help me then I’m all for it! Except, the thing is I’m not sure I want to go down that path again. I guess it smells too much like a “diet” to me. And aren’t the mottos here “Diets don’t work” and “If you do the same thing you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten”. When I first started looking into the Lap Band it looked like the miracle I’d been searching for forever…Eat healthy, but mostly regular foods, just a lot less of them and the best part…you won’t be starving all the time. But after perusing this site more, I’ve found there’s a LOT of talk about dieting after the LB…even some of the diets I’ve been on before. I’m not saying that doesn’t or won’t work; different things work for different people…I’m just not sure it’s right for me yet. It just seems counterintuitive to me. The reasons I’ve always gained weight back is because yes, I felt like I was starving, but also because I got tired of not being able to eat normally. I hated thinking about food 24/7, planning and cooking special meals separate from my family, and tracking everything…it’s just not a normal relationship with food and isn’t that what I’m trying to change? OK, before you say Well, it doesn’t sound like you’re willing to do the work it’s going to take to make the Lap Band work, maybe you’re not ready for it”. I’ve seen those posts where someone thinks the LB is going to do the work for them…I get it, I know it’s going to be hard work. I get that I’ll be on a very strict pre-op and post-op diet, and I get that I’ll be giving up some foods forever, drinking protein shakes when needed, and yes even cooking some different meals from my family on occasion. I see the benefit in tracking my calories at the beginning year of having the Lap Band or later when I’m not getting the results I want or when the Dr. needs me to track them. I’m willing to work hard to change my eating habits, and choose healthy things-high protein. Maybe it’s a matter of semantics, but I don’t call that a diet, I’d rather think of it as a lifestyle change…and somehow counting every calorie for the rest of my life doesn’t sound like anything but a diet. I also remember that when tracking calories it made me think about food more…obsessing over it in a different way. Maybe I’m overly optimistic about this, but I’m hoping I’ll be able to eventually work past the head hunger and that I’ll get to the point where I have a normal relationship with food…not obsessing over it with stuffing my face or with a “diet”. Or…maybe I’ll need the accountability that tracking food helps with...I don't know. Honestly, I’m not certain where I stand on this yet, I may be tracking every calorie in a few weeks. I guess it will be one of those things I’ll have to figure out as I go along. I'm sure the answer is different for everyone.
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12/13/08 Dashing through the Doctors...

Last night: I feel like all I’ve done is go to the Doctors/Dentist this month!:rolleyes2: My youngest came home from school today with a high fever and a sore throat…then he vomited on the carpet…then the kitchen floor:puke: (yes, I'm not an idiot...I had already given him a big barf bowl, why he didn't take it with him as he ran to the bathroom, I don't know:glare:) so into the bathtub and a call:phone: to the nurse for advice and an appointment in the morning. He’s resting now, so I just sat down to look at my calendar and put in his appointment (yes, you know me well…my very-anal-color-coded-by-person-calendar…I’d be lost without it:wink2:). I counted up 18 Dr./Dental appointments for the kids and me this month…and the only 2 LB ones were my PCP visit and my upcoming my surgeon consult. Who knows how many visits Mr.SA has, he keeps his own calendar. So take out Christmas holidays and what is that…more than one appointment every weekday!:glare: Boy, it sounds like we any unhealthy bunch…and the rest of the family are all skinny as rails! I won’t share my families medical issues- just mine (Mr. SA is the opposite of me about sharing that kind of stuff with anyone), but let’s say we’ve already reached our family prescription deductible. Oh well, all those waiting rooms have given me time to actually read the book I started this summer…halfway now…I never find time to read anymore. I guess it’s also a good prep to for all those LB appointments I’ll have next year! :biggrin: Oh, he’s awake…got to go push the fluids…   Today: After 6 more “vomit session” :puke:and me steam cleaning the carpet DS finally fell asleep last night…fever still raging. He was all better this morning but we kept our Dr. appointment anyway so they could do the strep test. So we went “dashing through the snow” :driving:again today (our Doctors office was closed, but the one in Richland was open). Rapid test negative:thumbup:…here’s hoping the longer one is too. He’s got 2 exploratory procedures coming up this Wed. (no surgery, nothing serious) so I’m hoping he’s well for them. That's life.:rolleyes3:
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12/12/08 Glamour Shots...(and "Telling Others")

Nope, no “Afters” or even “Befores”. Remember?...I know I told you!?:wink2: I went back to the Urologist yesterday (See my “12/5/08 Urodynamics” blog…if you want to sing a wacky Christmas Jingle with me) for my “Glamour Shots” (Yee Old Tiny Camera up the gazoo photos).:eek: I wonder if I can get a copy for my fridge?:biggrin: After all that (again) my Urologist comes in and says they didn’t find any problems:confused: from the original surgery so he’s going to send me to a Specialist at Magee (Specialist?:glare: I thought you WERE a specialist!). Oh, and he gave me a reassuring “Don’t worry…you won’t be leaking the rest of your life.”…what am I, a faucet? :sad:Sigh. I seem to always be the “exception” or have the weirdest medical things happen to me that the Doctors can’t/take forever to figure out.:out: Just ONE example of many; 2 years ago during 3 months of a TERRIBLE no-sleep literally-can’t-leave-the-house-because-I cough-so-hard-I-vomit:puke: constant cough, it took 5 Doctors and 2 Specialist and about 5 different diagnosis of everything from hand-foot-mouth disease to small pulmonary embolisms:ohmy: for me to finally get a “we think you have adult onset asthma…that was aggravated by…”…who knows?:rolleyes2: The good new is, none of my problems have been terrible things that I know so many have to deal with…Hey, if the worst thing that happens to me is peeing every time I laugh, which my youngest just told me I do way to often :laugh:(the laughing, not the peeing, although that's true too), then I’ve got a lot to be thankful for! Asthma for me is like being obese and the many comorbidities it causes…you just get tired of it, tired of not feeling healthy.:frown:   I think one of my first questions for the new “Specialist” will be “Is there a chance this could improve with weight loss?” I asked my Urologist that (after also telling him I was getting the LB) and he said “Not for you! That only happens with people that are huge-morbidly obese…You’re not that overweight!” :sosp: Yeah…us low BMIers hear that from anyone we tell :rolleyes3:(I’ve only told 3 Doctors and 3 Nurses and ALL of them have used those same 4 words…You’re not that overweight!:glare: To which my immediate reply is always “I’m 100 pounds overweight!”:mad2: I was surprised how that just came out the first time and how defensive I felt about wanting to get the LB.:huh2: Some of them came around and eventually said positive things once they saw I was serious about it, but it was a weird conversation even with these medical “strangers”. I felt like I had to give a list of what a failure I’ve been at weight loss and all the terrible things I’ve let happen to my body because of that in defense of wanting the LB. What negativity…not me.:hand: It reinforced my decision not to tell anyone but DH-Mr.SA (and of course the WHOLE WORLD on LBT). So come on World…get behind me on this (just don’t make me laugh).:lol2::yikes:
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12/11/09 Friday Facts

- I lost THREE pounds this week (don't ask me how)! One more pound until my ¾ Goal! Remind me of this happiness when I'm whining about a gain next week...and (judging from my pattern getting to my last ten pound head)...the next 10 weeks after that.   　 - I woke up to another bad UTI this morning…WTHeck! Yes, I took the right Cranberry (pain) pills this time, and I left a message for the doc, whom I just visited for my physical Wed., that I need an Rx. Please say a prayer that they don't make me drive the 40 min. to their office, or it will be time for my 'almost a diaper' pads again.   - Scratch that…they called and I had to go in (no more phone in Rx's)…there's 2 hours I'll never get back…if I didn't love our PCP so much I'd get one closer (guess it's a good thing I went as she thinks I have an antibiotic resistant UTI…and she thinks it's a continuation from the last one…testing underway). I keep telling them they need an office up North as I alone can keep them in business (you know it's bad when the Receptionist greeted me with a 'You're back again!').     　   - DH was sick at home from work yesterday…no, you don't understand…he hasn't taken off work in, I believe, 10 years (broken leg then). He managed to drag himself to work this morning for a meeting, (they can't live without him) but I'm guessing he'll be back soon (must…type…faster…). It has been confirmed that he's never allowed to retire (men are no fun when they're sick…I love my DH). 　   - School had a two hour delay this morning due to the wind chill factor temperature…How dare they invade on my time…I hate getting that automated phone call...better go make the most of my last few moments alone...I'm guessing I'll be spending most of it in the bathroom (stupid UTI).   Have a great weekend all!
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12/11/08 WANTED- Shoe Fairy

Since I’ve been rummaging the closet for pants the last few days, it got me thinking about shoes. Pre-kids I was a size 7 1/2-8 and now I’m an 8 1/2W-9W. I always thought that I gained sizes because of pregnancies and because of that ol’ “your feet spread as you get older” thing…you know…the same thing that makes you buy uglier and uglier shoes the older and fatter you get. When I worked and was thinner, I wore beautiful heels every day…stilettos some days even, but now I’ve got those stay-at-home-soccer-mom-who’s-let-herself-go shoes. You know the ones…almost always plain black…flats or a low huge chunky heel (who could balance on stilettos at my weight?)…sometimes an ugly square toed boot…tried those beautiful long pointy-toe ones…you know “witches boots” but I about killed myself tripping over those beautiful pointy-toes (yep, obese & balance aren’t a good mix). So anyway…I’ve been reading that people lost shoe sizes as they lost weight…seriously? This is good news indeed! Pretty shoes again…seriously?!!! Uh-oh…no, I mean UH-OH!!! I gave all my old ones/sizes to charity!!!!…Used shoes you say? Who would want those, you say? Well, my “collection” wasn’t just any old used shoes! My MIL worked for years (no longer) at a fancy boutique shoe store and twice a year when the seasons changed, I, and my SIL, were the recipients of the “shoe fairy” (usually got 3-6 pr. at a time). She was able to buy the out-of-season shoes for next to nothing for us…and these weren’t just any shoes, oh no!...these were “drool on yourself” “Carrie (Sex in the City) would be so jealous” shoes…all the best brands …some of them originally hundreds of dollars even “way-back-when” ...the kind that even made my short stubby almost-a-Wide feet look pretty…and I had so many…barely broken in! Now I’m no label snob at all…my daughter wants to turn me in to “What Not To Wear”…Shhh-do you think she’s noticed yet that I’ve only got 5 cruddy pants that fit (see “12/8/08 Pantless until June!” blog) I ask you, WHO wants to clothes shop when they’re fat?..Ahh the shoe-fairy...I can’t BELIEVE what a great deal it was…and now I can’t BELIEVE I gave them all new homes and I may be that size again! I didn’t even give/save any for my daughter that I could steal back…her feet are longer and narrower…Dang my DH giving my daughter the long pretty skinny feet gene (He’s a 14B, she’s a 9-10Narrow)… even SHE cried when I sent the last batch away…I remember, she tried to play “Ugly Step-Sister”…you know…trying to cram her size 9.5 feet into my size 7.5 Cinderella shoes…but no go. So I’m looking for a new Shoe Fairy…and hanging out the “Wanted” sign…after all, pretty shoes may be in my future!
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12/10/08 One Down, 5 To Go...Oh NO!

I had my first month’s weigh in with my PCP this morning. I came out 2 pounds lost (from my eat and drink fest last time), but at least I wasn’t water-logged/bladder bursting again so I could actually have a nice discussion and pay attention this time. My PCP visit went well and we discussed my building a support system (talked about online and the Healthwise Company support program I enrolled in). I’ve been having more trouble with my osteoarthritis in my lower back…not sure if it’s because I’ve just about eliminate the almost daily pain relievers since they started me on migraine medicine. I was afraid to start any pain relievers for my arthritis in fear of the migraines coming back (the arthritis is nothing compared to the migraines). She said it’s OK to start some Tylenol as needed, so we’ll see what happens. It’s also likely that I’m having more pain now that I’m exercising…my body saying “Exercise??!!! What’s that?!!” I’ve had some toe numbness on one side, so she’s having me get an x-ray just to be sure the discs are still OK.   I was so frustrated at the beginning of this process with learning I’d have to do the 6 mo. diet (Diet?!!! Been there, done that…if that worked I wouldn’t need a LAP-BAND®!), but after spending some time researching the LB I began to think 6 mo. was a good thing. There’s so much to learn and to prepare for. For example, this month my “Education Task” with my PCP was doing research and putting together my questions for my surgeon consult coming up. I’m actually amazed that even after 3 different hospital seminars how many questions I still have. I’ve been thinking about this and it’s because this isn’t like most procedures. Heck, when I had my hysterectomy & bladder sling it was pretty much textbook, no choices, standard procedures, I knew what would happen (except the failing part). With this I still have a million questions not only because every surgeon requires different pre & post-op testing/care (let’s not even get into all the differences in fill schedules/procedures/amounts)…but even with the surgery there’s differences….ie. I have a choice of which type of LB and a choice of where my port goes…and look at all the other differences we hear about on LBT: 1 incision or 5?, catheter or not?, CO2 heated and removed or not?, overnight or out-patient?, on and on. So having 6 mo. to research and prepare isn’t all bad and I know now I’ll be more successful afterwards because of what I’ve learned…   My only problem is…I started researching this in summer so I’m ALREADY almost at 6 mo. of preparing/researching…yep, when I look at it, the past 6 mo’s. went fast, but these next 5-6 months are going to be longggggggg! Help me make the time go faster...tell me a story…....anyone have a good joke?
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12/1/08 We Are.....!!!

It was the day before Thanksgiving and we’re packing up the car to go to go to Philly to my SIL/In-laws. We’re trying to get out the door by lunchtime because we know how bad the PA Turnpike gets this day. Side note: You pay a toll to take your life into your (white knuckled) hands to tailgate at 65 mph; :car::car:leave more then two car-lengths and someone darts in front of you (no turn signal, no smile, no wave…Happy Holidays to you too!), causing you to slam on the brakes and wonder if the car tailgating you will soon be in your backseat! :scared2: Back to the story…I finally got my three teens (DD is now 21 actually) out of bed and packing up their final items around 10am (this is early for some of them…teens!). My middle one (DS-18) comes up from the basement beaming.:biggrin: PAUSE right there! This alone is a holiday miracle…he’s going through that moody-teen:glare:Ask-your-teenager-now-while-they-still-know-everything phase:sneaky:…so moments of “beaming” are a rare commodity! He announces “I got accepted into the Engineering school at Penn State main campus!!! Whoo-Hoo!!”:party:(insert us jumping up and down here). Those of you that know PSU, know what a feat it is to get accepted to main campus your Freshman year (most go to a satellite their first 2 years). He’s a very smart kid (National Honor Society), but isn’t the best test taker (psyches himself out:scared2:). He took a course and studied for the SAT, 2 hours almost every day for months, and then took it several times. He thought he wanted to go to Ohio State “OH”… “IO”!!! (DH-Mr.SA and my alma-mater), but he missed the out-of-state scholarship by a mere 10 points on the SAT, so it was just too expensive to go there…He was crushed,:hurt:but I kept telling him things happen for a reason. Since then :pray2:we’ve been waiting:toetap05: for the acceptance letters online everyday, so this was welcome news indeed! He is totally thrilled (and we are too! He deserves this after all that hard work!...dilemma:confused3:...who will we root for at the PSU-OSU game next year?)! One of his best friends that he played on the soccer team and ref’d with got accepted as well (also engineering) so they’re making plans to room together. My niece is a junior there now, so she was thrilled when we got to her home for Thanksgiving and he told her. The chant around our house now is… :thumbup:“WE ARE” … “PENN STATE”:biggrin3:!!!
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11/7/09 Blogiversary!!

Note: I thought I had this cued up to post automatically Saturday on my Blogiversary while I was away, but apparently I’m still very tech-challenged…         Today is my first Blogiversary (to think a year ago I didn‘t even know what a blog was). Before I started this I made a point to read a few blogs (not on LBT) that I came across while I was researching the LB the summer before I joined LBT. I found that, while some of them were well written, I got quickly bored with the ones who didn’t have much depth-didn’t give me the ’real deal’. While I work hard to surround myself with positive people, like I strive to be, I also got bored with the ones whose lives were a bed of roses everyday…I don’t like negativity, but again, I like to get the ’real deal’…my life isn’t perfect…I’m not a perfect Bandster. So I made a conscious decision just to be myself and put it all out there…I figured if I wasn’t true to who I really am that I wouldn’t be able to attract people who had similar thinking that I needed for support.   It’s my moment to be a little narcissistic so I’ll apologize now. I decided to start this blog primarily for support as I didn’t feel like going to my hospital’s support group, which has more RNYers. I quickly found support (shout-out to Julie Ann for my first comment on my first blog) and I found out that I was learning so much from everyone here. I also found that as I finished each phase of my journey that I felt a strong need to ‘Pay It Forward’ through spending extra time with more research/details on subjects of my blog and by supporting others in theirs.       I decided to take a look back at my blog and see what others thought was helpful. WOW, some interesting realizations came out of that:   - 41,598 Views of my blog   - Almost 500 Comments from others   - Someone gave me ‘stars’ on one blog…I didn’t even notice that there was a rating system for blogs!   Wow, that was cool…       And then I looked at the top viewed blogs (you can use the calendar to your left to click on to get to any of these by the date):   - I’m a Bunny (4/3/09)   - My Wii Hates Mii (5/12/09)   - My Heart’s in the Right Place (8/12/09)   - Head Hunger and Bandster Hell…or maybe it‘s just Hell (5/2/09)   - I Peed My Pants! (11/10/09)   - LB Picasso (3/4/09)   - Steeler’s Nation and a Funny Song (1/31/09)   - Restriction…Finding the Balance (6/18/09)   - The Buzz about Coffee (3/12/09)   - Scale ***** (2/22/09)   - Dorm Décor (6/29/09)   - Hospital Packing List (2/24/09)   - Off with her head! (4/15/09)   - Dear Abby’s Daughter (2/5/09)   - Band Firsts (5/26/09)   - Scale Whores Anonymous- Semi-Annual Meeting (8/12/09)     The only one I’ve directed people to, more often than you’d think, is my second blog as I run across a lot of people here who are right on the cusp of either a 35 or a 40 BMI when they’re starting out (‘I Peed My Pants!). Ahh well, I’m still going to believe that I helped someone somewhere along the line…at least I know I helped their site with their ‘hits’ with getting sponsors LOL.       As I’ve progressed in my journey here I feel like I’m starting to have less to talk about regarding my Lap Band. I often feel a little guilty about just journaling for myself about my life and not about the LB. I feel like I’m misusing the site blogs and that those looking for LB info. might be disappointed some days. I’ve had a lot of messages all along over the year suggesting I take my blog to a more universal site, but I‘ve always felt that while I‘m still blogging mainly about my LB journey that this spot was the best way for me to ‘Pay it Forward‘ and for me to continue learning. I’m not sure where the next year will take me, or how much I’ll continue blogging, but like the rest of this journey, I’ll take it as it comes.       *Portion of Post Deleted For Lap Band Book       I know one thing, this blog has given me everything I’ve wanted from it and many more things I’ve never even expected. I’ve enjoyed it much more than I ever thought possible. I’ve gotten so much support and made so many great friends here (if you’re ever near Pittsburgh, let me know)! I’m constantly surprised by what I end up writing about and by what I learn through this process.       Most of all on this Blogiversary I want to say I love you all and want to say THANK YOU for your support and friendship! This past year would have been such a lonely journey and I would have struggled so much more without you all. It would have felt like I have on every other ‘diet’ I’ve been on constantly for the past 20 years. Even surrounded with great friends and family, the WL piece of my life, even with all the temporary ’successes’ was always a very lonely, frustrating and even shameful piece of my life. I’ve never gone through a WL process where I’ve felt so positive even at moments where things weren’t going perfectly. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for always being there for me.    
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11/7/08 Secret the World Knows

First things first. I had no idea what a Blog was and now I'm writing mine...a "journal", I get it. My kids would be proud of this technological feat (maybe someday I'll figure out how to do those photos online-Avatar...isn't that a Cartoon?)...except at this point I've decided not to tell anyone about this "journey" except my skinny DH, whom I dearly love. Let's face it, if you've never fought obesity for more than a decade (OK, I'll give him the "college fatties" that he soon lost) you just don't get it. He's supportive in his own way (he just sat through two different information seminars with me), but I know him well... He married a 5'9" (I've lost an inch), 132# art teacher who also taught 8 aerobic exercise classes a week. He's watched me go up and down the scale drastically. It's hard, but I can lose major weight (up to 50)...My real problem is keeping it off. Heck, I was 80# lighter just 8 years ago when we moved here and I've been up and down 30 and then 45 pounds of that twice in the 8 years since. His reaction to Lap Band "It's so drastic. Can't you just do Atkins again and then we can get you a gym membership so you can keep it off?" (I wish). Now, I can hardly move around without hurting at almost 250#...I'm sure I LOOK lazy sitting in the recliner with the heating pad on my osteoarthritic back. Ahh...if only they knew how much more WORK it is to be fat...seriously, just think about it...how much time have I spent researching, doing, logging diets and exercise plans...how many minutes a day are spent just thinking about food/diets/self image/my obesity...I wish I could get all that time back to just Live Life! Will everyone I know be surprised if I lose a lot of weight...no, they've all seen me do it before...but they, and I, will be shocked if I can keep it off. That is my secret hope...I just want to feel healthy again...and getting back into those skinny jeans will just be a bonus!!!!     I'll track my progress another time, but I'll tell you in my few months of researching this I've done a 180 on sharing this process, at least for now. I'm known as a "sharer", nothing is sacred...I had my hysterectomy and incontinence sling surgery...everyone knew (yeah, even the husbands in the neighborhood...I can't help that they were at the bus stop waiting for their kids while the Mom's were asking me about it...they couldn't have talked a little louder about "the game last night"?) and I shared whatever anyone wanted to know...if you've never been through incontinence "testing" you haven't lived (and the surgery failed, so I'm starting testing again...wee!...literally). I don't get embarressed by this stuff and I find a sense of support by sharing to whomever wants to know, but I've changed my mind for this process. After reading many others experiences both positive and negative with telling others about their Lap-Band, I've decided for once in my life to keep this under wraps. I think what's left of my self-esteem just can't handle any negativity about this. It's against my nature to not share this, and it's going to be harder on me, so I was glad to find an outlet here for sharing...even if no one ever reads anything.     So HELLO "My Blog"! I'm not really keeping a secret if it's here for the world to read. This will be my place to vent, to plan, to track, and hopefully to celebrate, and maybe find some friendly support along the way! Thanks for listening Blog.
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11/5/09 14's!

DD's been busy so last night DH insisted on taking me out to get a new pair of jeans for our trip this weekend (off to see DS1)...apparently my old high-top relaxed fit Mom jeans are baggy in all the wrong places. The kids have been telling me daily that my pants are too big. Finding a perfect pair of jeans is hard these days!!! Do you want waist-high, mid-rise, low-rise, curvy, skinny, tummy panel, stretch, straight-leg, boot-cut, and don’t get me started on all the colors, wear marks, and decorations. Then I had to decide on length…I’ve lost an inch (down to just under 5’9”) so now regulars are too short and longs are too long. Well, I sent DH on to the other store to pick up a prescription while I got to work. He was back about the time I finally decided what I was looking for and I knew I had work fast and be out within 30 min. (he didn’t get the shopping gene). I took about 8 pair into the dressing room…all too big? I tentatively came back out and sent DH to grab some 14’s…THEY FIT!!!! OK, the size 14’s now are more generous than when I last wore 14’s many moons ago, but THEY FIT!!! My 16’s, I’ve been wearing, I’ve been back into twice in the last 10 years, but 14’s…I believe that was several children ago. Size 24 to a 14...awesome. I ended up with some dark blue (no wear lines on the front- the horizontal lines across my hips and thighs made my widest part look wider), plain pocket (I don’t need decorations on the back pockets drawing attention to my bum), mid-rise (no more ‘Mom Jeans’), straight leg, 14L’s (hope they shrink a tiny bit). OK, they’re not the coolest pair of jeans, but I’ll have plenty of time to look for those…maybe, just maybe…when I reach a size 12!   The nicest part came as we got back in the car (within 30 min. I might add). DH said ‘You’ve been working so hard to get the weight off, you needed a pair of jeans that fit you…you look great!’ A nice NSV... Well we're off tomorrow to PSU to see DS1 and I can't wait to see him. We're all going to the big game (OSU-PSU Look for us, we'll be the only ones in Red as it's a PSU White-Out) and yes, DS1 and his buds have been tenting in Paternoville all week (he says he's freezing). It's been killing me that the fraternity has kept him there on the weekends we had planned. If it wasn't for DH I would have packed up and gone out there just to see him between classes...I know, I know...time to let go a little. Saturday is my Blogiversary...so stay tuned!
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11/29/09 So Much To Be Thankful For!

I hope you all had a great long Holiday weekend (or week)! We sure did! It was great having DS1 home for a week. DH just left to take the PSU boys back to college so it was a wild morning today getting things together. DD just took DS2 out for lunch, a movie ('Planet 51'), and some Christmas shopping…as the youngest, he loves having any kind of private time with any of us, so I was really happy that they wanted to spend time together. I'm left to unwind here and get out some decorations for Christmas, but that's another story.     We enjoyed each others company and time together this week…played lots of games, went shopping on Black Friday (OMG the crowds this year!), etc. I'll have to say it was wonderful being home. We had some great moments together.           DH wanted to pick out the turkey, so I asked him to get a small one since it would only be the five of us. DS2 went with him and they picked out a 22 lb. turkey…ummm….what didn't they understand about the word 'small'?!!! Here's the rational I was given 'The deal was on the turkey's that were 18 lbs. or over and there weren't any that were 18-20 lbs…..Why pay more for a 16 lb. turkey when we can get a bigger one for less?!!!' Can you tell he's not the turkey chef?     Ah well…I had to increase the amount of stuffing so it wouldn't be lost in the turkey and get dried out, but other than that it wasn't a problem. I had DD help me 'dress' the turkey so she could learn how and there was lots of squealing 'Ooooo gross!!!!' as we removed the giblets to make the stock for the gravy, put butter between the skin and the meat, stuffed the cavities, sewed it closed, and bent the wings backwards (it took us at least 5 min. to ram that giant bird into my huge roasting pan). The meal turned out perfectly thanks to everyone pitching in at the end and everything came out at the same time as planned.           I asked all the kids to tell me their 'Thanksgiving favorites' as I was planning the menu. I noticed as I was bringing everything in to the buffet that, other than the turkey, there was nothing low cal or healthy about the meal…turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, green bean casserole w/fried onions, yam casserole in brown sugar, cranberry sauce, assorted olives, crescent rolls and butter, and pumpkin pie with whipped cream. OK, I guess it's not supposed to be a healthy meal, but next year I might add something healthy to the list…maybe some pumpkin soup or something with fruit?           *Portion of Post Deleted for Lap Band Book     I'm so thankful that I had my whole family together and that we were able to stay home and really just enjoy each other…it was a wonderful Thanksgiving week!    
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11/25/08 Saying Goodbye

We’re off tomorrow :driving:for the holiday to DH-Mr.SA’s Family. I’ve been finding myself saying goodbye to certain foods already (does anyone else do that?)…strange since I’m still 6 mo. from the band. It’s mainly those items I don’t get often, like this past weekend at my parent’s house we were celebrating early Christmas…I found myself relishing Mom’s :drool:homemade pumpkin roll and her strawberry salad (she only makes once a year). Now I’m already looking forward to, and mourning the future loss of,:cool: the stuffing and pumpkin pie on Thursday. I know I’ll get tastes of things in the future, but it’s like saying goodbye to a good friend (OK, maybe a friend you thought was a good friend, but was really stabbing you in the back:sneaky:…I see it’s time to start that mindset change).:confused: HAPPY THANKSGIVING ALL!
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11/24/09 Holiday Cheer

I’m channeling my creativity (so I don‘t take it out on the Thanksgiving pie this year)…I just finished making my annual Christmas decoration exchange items. I was behind again this year in thinking of an idea (as if I‘m ever ahead), so I drug (dragged?) DH to the stores with me this weekend looking for inspiration. There wasn’t much to inspire out there this year, so as usual, I made up my own. We’ve been doing these so many years I realized I’ve never made anything for the kitchen, so that was my inspiration. I made a decoration to hang from a cupboard or other place in the kitchen with a pick, handmade bows and some cookie cutters and ribbon…OK, not all that creative, but I had to make a bunch of these and mail them out soon and these went together quickly (pic attached). 　 Could you hear me? I was playing the holiday music and singing my way through my crafts the last two mornings (much to my family’s complaints). I know, I know, I’m the first one to say when I’m in the stores ‘What’s up with the Christmas music? It’s not even Thanksgiving yet!!!‘ , but it sure got me in the mood to make Christmas decorations. So if your feeling a little blah heading into the holidays (been hearing a lot of that lately here), crank up the music, make a craft or bake some cookies (and freeze them, of course, so you won‘t be tempted)…it will get you in the spirit, I promise. Put them all in bikinis and that will keep you from eating them! 　 I took the leftovers and made a whole string of holiday cookie cutters with picks and ribbon at each end for over my kitchen sink window (pic attached). I think I need to get some more ribbon and picks and pull the center up with a big bow or something for a focal point. You know me, over-decoritis is my affliction when it comes to the holidays...one can never have too many holiday decorations!
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11/24/08 Told You So

:driving:We had a good weekend back home with my family (once we got through the snow). It’s nice having my daughter home from college for the holiday.:confused: DH took my two oldest to the football game and I went shopping with the girls. We celebrated early Christmas Saturday night and it went very smoothly.   My sister sent me some hilarious video’s of elves dancing to Christmas music with my families faces on the elves (you do them yourself at the Office Max website- “Elf Yourself” by JibJab) give it a try; they’re hysterical (and the elves are all skinny)!:huh2: Anyway I’d forwarded it to my sister-in-law (the true “foodie”; she can cook) and asked her yet AGAIN:sad: what I could bring for Thanksgiving (read blog "Why I won't be asked to bring dessert..."). Her response “Just bring yourselves on Turkey Day!”. :glare: I told you so:tt2:…:cool:
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11/23/09 Let The Festivities Begin!

My baby boy (DS1) is home from college for the week and the holidays have begun. He was sick as a dog before he got home, but besides the cough, he’s better now. I made a Dr.’s appointment for him this morning and he’s getting his last flu shot (swine). DH and I got our swine flu shots finally on Friday. DS1 and I probably both already had the swine flu, but they said we should get the shot anyway as there’s a possibility it could have been something else…either that or we’ll turn into swine. 　 We had a great weekend! We had our first fire in the fireplace and the Yule log is still around after 2 nights of fires. The kids made our traditional annual Gingerbread house (no, not this one, but pic attached)…a little early, but they were looking for something to do together. DH and I shared one of those ‘looks’ while they were busy icing and decorating, where we were having a ‘kid moment’…our babies are all home, it’s the Holidays, and they’re all working together happily and laughing. 　 I set the Thanksgiving table and buffet to get everyone in the mood (pic attached). The fridges are full of things waiting to be made. Yes, I’m cooking…stop laughing…no, I mean it, stop!…I’ve got recipes and I promise to follow them. I’ll have to tell you though that the refrigerated pastry crust for the pumpkin pie came in a two pack and it’s very tempting to get creative with that second crust…(in case you didn’t read my cooking creativity moments READ HERE). Let the festivities begin!
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11/20/08 OK, that wasn?t so bad

I got my first call from my “Healthwise” coach, Valerie today. (In case you haven’t read…it’s a third party co. that DH's company hires to coach those with “issues” like mine on the health survey form we have to fill out for insurance). I had to answer all those embarrassing questions first…height, weight,:willy_nilly:…after that it doesn’t matter right? Anyhoo…we start into diet and I tell her about the LB and the 6 mo. diet I’m on with my PCP. Didn’t say anything about the LB, but she loved the diet plan…start at 1600 cal. And step down 100 ea. month. She was so supportive and encouraging.:incazzato: Everything I said was immediately given positive reinforcement. I was feeling myself relax…like a day at the spa:sleep: (or what I imagine it to be like since I’ve never been to one). We talked a little about my exercise habits, etc., then we set some goals for next month’s call. She’s all about reinforcing what the PCP is doing with me. :cryin: I suggested adding 10 min. to my exercise routine, she suggested 5 min….it’s all about small changes she said and being able to easily make them. More supportive discussion…la, la, la…I’m feeling like I just got a massage :banghead:(or what I imagine a massage to be like, since I’ve never had one). We set a date for next month…la, la, la…OK, that wasn’t so bad!:cursing:
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11/2/09 It's Calling My Name...

I jinxed myself...we each carved a pumpkin for Halloween and I did the PBing Pumpkin as planned (pic attached & my front door/porch). Yesterday I had my first PB in a long time (peanuts got me).   I made DH buy all the candy...guess I should have been more specific to buy things I don't like, because he bought lots of chocolate (I'm a chocoholic). I haven't eaten one...yet. I put all my favorites in the bowl to give out first on Halloween, but there's still a whole bowl left. ...it's sitting in the kitchen... ...and I swear... ...it's calling my name!
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11/19/08 Inspiration in Skinny Photos

So I’m making my Christmas ornaments today. I know, I know, for all of you out there in the work world you’re saying “Rough Life BG!”.:willy_nilly: I worked for a long time, so I’m there with you…and yes, I do appreciate rare days like today…snowflakes falling…holiday music playing…and I’m hot gluing ornaments (Hey, I’ve got the dishwasher and laundry going and I could get BURNED by the glue gun…it’s tough work I tell you!). :cryin: (I should be packing us up for our two different trips to our families next week as Mr.SA is traveling all this week,:incazzato: but I'm not.) Actually, I copped out this year, big time…I’m using a kit :puke:(shhhh)…blasphemy for an ex Art Teacher…I just didn’t find any inspiration this year.:prrr: Understand, these ornaments/or decorations (exchange with family and my gifts for neighbors/friends) are a lot of pressure for me every year…it’s my “Martha Stewart” moment;:banghead: lots of pressure. I always create original ideas and go to great lengths to make something unique each year and now the bar is set very high for beautiful handmade gifts…antique bobbins made into a candle stick with ribbons braided through the holes and tin punched trees ontop with the candle; Hand painted plates with potpourri and candles; beautiful hanging “Kissing Balls” with mistletoe, fancy ribbons and bells; a set of wine charms with beads and different clay Christmas characters glazed and shining…:present:see, pressure. I ponder this all year and gather:driving: the perfect supplies…I’ve spent weeks on them some years, even finished making them in the summer sometimes…not this year…no time, :nonod:NO inspiration. Luckily I bought several ornament kits about 6 six years back and have kept them in my craft closet…just in case:nono:…NO WAY would I need them. But there I was last night digging them out of the closet. They are little clear round ornaments that are water filled and have different types of glitter (a snowglobe, you know). They actually have 2 halves and you twist them open and add 2 back-to-back photos:camera: and close them back up. I’m adding all kinds of ribbon and doodads to the top, but no way to disguise these as "not a kit":glare:…I know they’re lame…no Martha this year...I can feel the disappointment now. I was going through all my photos yesterday trying to find 2 photos (and the right size) of each person. I was struck by how few photos there are of me fat, but I also was struck by the ups and downs of my weight battle…160 lbs. (for the millionth time) just years ago…I remember I didn’t feel very skinny then at all…but there were the photos…no double chin…no belly. I have a hard time seeing myself as I am, at any weight, even now:blink:…I don’t feel like I look that fat, but I know I am.:yikes: So this year I found my inspiration in my skinny photos…inspiration for my journey here.:cursing: Too bad that doesn’t translate well into an ornament…but now I’m making one just for me…with my skinny photos...:dita:
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